HOW TO STOP SELF SABOTAGING + DOUBTING

HOW TO STOP SELF SABOTAGING + DOUBTING

HOW TO STOP SELF SABOTAGING + DOUBTING
HOW TO STOP SELF SABOTAGING + DOUBTING
HOW TO STOP SELF SABOTAGING + DOUBTING

MAKE YOUR GOALS/HABITS AN IDENTITY. Your lifestyle makes up who you are, quite literally. If you want to wake up early, then start identifying yourself as an early bird. If you want to get good grades, then start identifying yourself as a studious student. And so on. 

This helps with feeling more accountable and committed to our goals and habits. However, don’t use this as a reason to overexert yourself. 

THERE IS SOMETHING UNDERNEATH CERTAIN BEHAVIOURS. All of your bad habits stem from your subconscious. This is why mentally healthy people tend to think more about their physical health. 

The best way to recognise patterns beneath your bad habits is just to talk to yourself. In any way or any form. Identify it, see what might’ve caused this subconscious thought and then work towards a way to replace the feeling that these bad habits give with a good one. 

DETACH FROM THE OUTCOME. The more you fixate on the long-term results, the more longer, strenuous and exhausting your journey is going to be, especially because you’re going to want to give up as soon as results don’t appear. Focus on the short-term results. 

You exercised? Now you feel good inside. You studied hard and understood everything? Great job for being so productive. You did that one really scary thing? What a great start!

THE PART OF YOU THAT DOES BAD HABITS IS NOT BAD. It is the complete opposite of bad. It loves you and wants to keep you safe, so it refrains you from doing anything ‘scary’ (which is typically new things in our lives) and makes you fall back on ‘safe’ habits which are a coping mechanism. 

So, instead of berating that part of you that participates in bad habits even if you know it’s bad, understand it. As these coping mechanisms usually stem from our childhoods, we turn to these habits when we feel stressed, anxious or depressed. 

More Posts from Stunnaofc and Others

1 year ago

ways to stay unbothered

Ways To Stay Unbothered

left out? actually try and engage with other people, join clubs to make more friends and don't beg other people.

feeling sick? make sure to drink plenty of water and get sleep, rest your head from any screens and just meditate.

left on read? it's not a big deal, just don't make yourself to them anymore, it will make them value you more.

feeling ugly? appreciate yourself and know that you're the most amazing person ever, your beauty doesn't define who you are.

lacking confidence? don't care about what others say about you and be bold. keep your head up high and focus on yourself.

hungry? try and eat something new today and be creative. try and be healthier and go for smoothies as a drink with your meal.

they don't like you? who cares, it's their loss <3

Ways To Stay Unbothered
Ways To Stay Unbothered
7 months ago
This Is Literally So Me Coded 🪽🍰

this is literally so me coded 🪽🍰

1 year ago

where to start

Where To Start
Where To Start
Where To Start

introduction:

self-improvement looks very simple on paper. eat better, workout, have a skin care and hair care routine. lower your screentime, study, be organized, have hobbies. but trust me i know how difficult it is to actually DO the things you talk about doing. how hard it is to even know where to start, and how to stay consistent. roadblocks also happen, things out of your control. but ultimately you can make change in your life, just little by little.

planning:

during this stage you need to think of what you want to accomplish and creating an action plan full of steps that can get you there. i've provided my own example too :)

prioritize your physical and mental health. when those things are improving then pretty much everything else in your life will start to follow. just look at yourself now and think 'what can i do better? how can i be happier & healthier?'

write down your goals.

create an action plan for each goal. what steps can you take to achieve this goal? make a step by step plan.

come up with things you can do everyday to reach that goal. what adjustments can you make in your everyday routine that'll help you get there? for example, i want to make an etsy shop so i sew for 20+ minutes a day on weekends, and sew 30 minutes on weekdays.

excecuting:

the most important part is slowly easing into your new habits. look at your goals and think 'what steps am i taking to reach it?'

meeting your basic needs. before you even think about self improvement make sure you're taking care of your health and hygeine. this means eating enough, being hydrated, taking care of your hygeine. always make sure that your core needsre met consistently before you even begin.

start small. once you've gotten consistent with meeting your basic needs then start making small changes. (ex. exercising for 10 minutes, reading for 10 minutes, start small with the habits you planned) dont overwhelm yourself!

have a fluid plan. be open to change- if something really isn't working then adjust it! and, when you continue to do something for a while, start doing it longer- i used to walk around 1.5 miles daily for almost a month and then started doing 2.5. keep increasing until you're at a healthy point.

having a good mindset. as always make sure your mindset is good. remember that progress isn't linear- you're going to screw up sometimes and get off track. just make sure you learn from every experience.

conclusion:

no matter what there ARE going to be problems or things that don't go your way, things that aren't in your control. since my 15th birthday i've been applying to jobs left and right, over 30 or so, and it's been 5 months of rejection due to my age (15 year olds can only work 3 hours in a row and most places need more). since i can't control that i just keep applying and in the mean time i focus on the other aspects of my life! it can be really frustrating but you just have to keep pushing.

7 months ago

How I get whatever I want.

- Journal. It’s important to plot out what you want before you begin doing anything new. Sit down, concentrate, and take the time to visualize what you want for yourself. Journaling is an extremely effective tool, and it’s important to be able to write about what you want instead of creating a concept in your mind. 

- Make goals less abstract: Find or make a path to the goal, then zone out (networking, reading, research). Your goals should not be abstract or difficult for you to understand. They should be clear, planned out to the best of your ability, and reasonable enough to achieve in 90 days. If you have a long-term goal, set up a series of short-term goals that will set you on the right path. 

- 3 month hiatus and just fixate on work. Be strict with time and money, keep a schedule, don’t allow minor distractions to sway you from your path, and use the next 90 days to bring yourself closer to the finish line. Can your hiatus be longer than 3 months? Yes, but if it becomes necessary to extend it, be sure that you’re engaging with the real world and not isolating yourself.

- You have to be sure of what waiting and a little bit of luck will do for you. So much of it is a waiting game, and while I believe that it’s important to work hard instead of being hard on yourself, knowing that luck plays into your success is imperative. If you don’t see immediate results, keep going until things fall into line. 

Plan, prepare, and then put your whole soul into action.

1 year ago

Things I do to take care of myself

Inspired by @theambitiouswoman

Hello girlies! On this blog I'm going to write down all the habits I do to take care of my self. These ones I have been practicing them since a long time and I know they maintain me healthy, happy, balanced and stress free. I hope I can inspire you to discover the habits that make you feel your best and start doing some of the things I do!

My habits

Have a morning and night routine to follow

Sleep 8 hours on a consistent schedule

Eat at least one fruit a day, along three healthy meals and drink enough water

Pray when I wake up

Do yoga in the morning and meditate at night

Do my skincare 2 times daily (morning and night)

Have an "everything shower" 2x times per week

Listen to positive affirmations in the morning

Dress up pretty every time I'm going out

Listen a podcast daily

Read one chapter of a book daily

Dedicate one hour for introspective journaling and healing yoga + meditation 2xtimes per week

Use less than 4 hours my phone (15 minutes max on every social media app)

Unfollow any account that doesn't make me feel good with myself or consume content that doesn't inspire me

Study a language 30 minutes - 1 hour 3x times per week

Spend time with my loved ones during the week

Write down a journal entry before sleep

Be productive and focus on my tasks to be free the more time possible

Make a daily to-do list

Maintain my personal space clean

Take my daily supplements after breakfast

Look from time to time my vision boards

Dedicate time to prepare my meals and make lunch for university (instead of spending)

Keep track of my financial movementes

Focus on living in the present and be carefree about life

Smile, be kind and maintain the calm with people

On my free time do things I love ( like blogging, gaming, watch YT, etc)

Be mindful of all the sensorial stimulation (use less screens and earphones)

Respect when my body needs to rest

Have a optimistic mindset that works in my favor

Play with and take care of my pets (my happy pills)

Have a "Sunday reset" routine dedicated to deep cleaning, laundry, weekly review and planning, self-care, etc

See you on the next blog! 𑄽𑄺ྀ

Things I Do To Take Care Of Myself
Things I Do To Take Care Of Myself
Things I Do To Take Care Of Myself
1 year ago

Motivation Affirmations ✨✨

I am capable of achieving my dreams.

Every step I take brings me closer to my goals.

I am deserving of success and abundance.

Challenges are opportunities for growth.

I am focused, persistent, and driven.

My potential is limitless.

I believe in myself and my abilities.

Every day, I become a better version of myself.

I am resilient and can overcome any obstacle.

Success is a journey, not a destination.

I am in charge of my destiny.

My goals are achievable and realistic.

I am surrounded by positive energy and support.

I am constantly inspired and motivated.

My actions align with my purpose.

I am deserving of all the good that comes my way.

I am a magnet for success and prosperity.

I am committed to my vision and purpose.

I trust the process and the timing of my life.

Every setback is a setup for a comeback.

I am fearless in the pursuit of my dreams.

I am worthy of all the success I seek.

My determination is stronger than any challenge.

I am constantly evolving and improving.

I am focused on solutions, not problems.

I celebrate every small victory along the way.

I am in control of my thoughts, actions, and emotions.

I am surrounded by opportunities for growth and success.

I am driven by passion and purpose.

I am unstoppable in the pursuit of my goals.

6 months ago

Becoming "that girl" and the trap of materialism

Becoming "that Girl" And The Trap Of Materialism

Work on your inner self before making any external changes.

It's easy to believe that the next new thing you acquire, whether that be clothes, beauty procedures etc will be the thing to solve all your problems in life. But, it probably won't. All it will be is a drain on your resources and you will still be insecure, just with more stuff. This is not to say you can't buy those things, but to be mindful of the reason why you're buying them. Do you actually want it? Or have you been led to believe you want it, by marketing, social media or what other people are doing?

Even if you don't necessarily like what you see in the mirror, it's important to have love for yourself regardless. At the end of the day, all our bodies are is a vessel for us to inhabit. Despite our best efforts, we are not always going to be looking 100% because life constantly throws stuff at us. There will be times we are so busy we don't eat as well as we should, or stress may impact our appearance through weight gain, acne or bloating. If we go seeking validation for this vessel from the outer world, we make ourselves vulnerable to attracting bad people/energy into our lives. If we are mentally in tune with ourselves, this reflects into our outer appearance and we cannot be shaken by external influences.

You can love yourself and think you'd look objectively better with a certain procedure or a different weight. You can love yourself and want to be different than the person you are currently. A desire for improvement that stems from your love of self is stable and patient. This is important because real change doesn't happen overnight. If you lack this self love, you cannot be objective about yourself and will end up in a never-ending series of 'quick-fix' changes in the impossible pursuit of perfection that will leave you worse off in the long run.

Things you can do to develop your inner state:

Shadow work - Your unresolved tensions from past events will repeat themselves until you address them.

Read/listen to podcasts about things that interest you - Don't you love seeing the way a person's face lights up when they talk about something they find fascinating?

Reducing your social media time - Social media is fake, everyone is just projecting the image they want to project and you have no clue what's truly going on in their lives. Take part but be mindful of this.

Practice gratitude and kindness everyday - To yourself and others. Thing about the simple routines in your daily life, how lucky are you to be able to partake in them? Someone's being a bit rude to you? It's nothing to do with you and everything to do with how they show up in the world, so don't take it personally. A bad personality makes a person look ugly, no matter how attractive their appearance is.

Exercise - It does wonders for mental health. Start small and work your way up. It can be as simple as taking a walk outside or following a YouTube video. Even if you give up halfway, you still showed up and gave something. Something is always better than zero.

Change your diet - Our mental state is impacted by the things we choose to put inside ourselves. If you're eating ultra processed foods like McDonalds, Doritos etc on the daily you could probably feel better than you currently do. You don't have to go crazy and cut everything cold turkey (you'll more than likely relapse), work on making small swaps for healthier versions of the things you like for a sustainable, long-term approach.

7 months ago

HOW TO STAY UNBOTHERED!

1. Never say more than necessary.

2. Don't allow your emotions to overpower your intelligence.

3. Lower your expectations from others.

4. Let your success do the talking.

5. 10 people 10 different opinions. Stop pleasing.

6. Remember your haters are your fans.

7. Don't be afraid to say "NO".

9. Know your truth and be okay with someone else not believing you.

10. Stop taking things personally.

• Let go of control: You can't control others' actions or words, just your reactions.

• Humor: Learn to laugh things off when appropriate.

• Set boundaries: Limit contact with negativity and prioritize supportive people.

• Communicate clearly: Ask for clarification Instead of assuming negativity

• Shift your perspective: Consider the source and if their comment reflects on them more than you.

• Focus on what you can control: Improve your own communication and self-care.

• Thicken your skin: Build strong self-worth and know your value.

11. Healthy detachment.

• Let people be who they want to be, then decide if you want them in your life.

• Trust that rejection is always redirection to something bigger and better.

• Some people are only meant to help you grow, not be in your life forever.

• What if everything is falling apart to come together in a way you can't guess?

• Focus only on what you can control.

1 year ago

How to Stop Procrastinating by Managing Your Emotions

Procrastination happens when we delay doing things, and it's often connected to our emotions. Feelings like being afraid to fail, feeling worried or stressed, getting bored, or lacking motivation can all contribute to procrastination. To stop procrastinating and get more things done, it's important to learn how to handle our emotions better.

Boredom:

Break the task into smaller, more engaging sub-tasks.

Find ways to make the task more interesting or challenging.

Set a timer and work on the task for a specific amount of time, followed by a short break doing something enjoyable.

Feeling Overwhelmed:

Prioritize tasks and focus on one thing at a time.

Break the task into smaller, more manageable steps.

Delegate some parts of the task if possible or seek help from others.

Use tools like to-do lists or task management apps to stay organized.

Anxiety:

Practice deep breathing or mindfulness techniques to calm yourself.

Challenge negative thoughts and replace them with more positive and realistic ones.

Start with the easier or less intimidating aspects of the task to build momentum.

Set realistic expectations and remind yourself that it's okay to make mistakes.

Self-Doubt:

Focus on past accomplishments and successes to boost your confidence.

Seek support or feedback from others to gain reassurance.

Remind yourself of your skills and capabilities to tackle the task.

Use positive affirmations to counteract negative self-talk.

Perfectionism:

Embrace the concept of "good enough" rather than seeking perfection.

Set realistic and achievable goals for each task.

Recognize that mistakes and imperfections are part of the learning process and growth.

Indecisiveness:

Break decisions into smaller steps and make one small decision at a time.

Set a time limit for making decisions to avoid overthinking.

Trust your instincts and make the best decision you can with the information available.

Apathy or Lack of Interest:

Find aspects of the task that align with your values or long-term goals.

Break the task into smaller, more manageable parts and focus on completing one at a time.

Reward yourself for completing the task to make it more appealing.

Stress or Burnout:

Practice stress-reduction techniques such as meditation, exercise, or spending time in nature.

Break tasks into smaller steps to reduce the feeling of overwhelm.

Prioritize self-care and take breaks to avoid burnout.

Feeling Uninspired or Creatively Blocked:

Engage in activities that stimulate creativity, such as brainstorming, mind mapping, or seeking inspiration from others' work.

Start with a simple and basic version of the task to get the creative juices flowing.

Collaborate with others or seek feedback to gain new perspectives.

Fear of Success:

Identify and challenge the negative beliefs or fears that may be holding you back.

Visualize the positive outcomes of completing the task successfully.

Focus on the benefits and personal growth that come with success.

Impatience:

Break long-term goals into smaller milestones to track progress.

Practice mindfulness to stay present and patient throughout the process.

Remind yourself that progress takes time and effort.

Lack of Confidence:

Celebrate your past accomplishments to boost your confidence.

Seek support and encouragement from friends, family, or mentors.

Focus on building specific skills related to the task to increase confidence.

Avoiding Discomfort:

Acknowledge that discomfort is a natural part of growth and improvement.

Break tasks into smaller steps and tackle the more challenging aspects gradually.

Remind yourself of the long-term benefits of facing discomfort.

Overestimating Future Motivation:

Practice discipline and commit to starting tasks even when motivation is low.

Set specific deadlines for tasks to create a sense of urgency.

Establish a routine that includes regular work on the task to build consistency.

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stunnaofc - no gimmicks.
no gimmicks.

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