I Dream About Being A Mom More Then Anything Else

Today,

I found my bathroom to be particularly interesting.

Why don’t we take photos with curiosity anymore.

Well

Why don’t I take curious photos anymore

?

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I miss me

It’s been a long job.

I’m getting calls because my friends and family have forgotten that a few weeks ago I told them how busy and broke I’d be.

And even though they understood my missing presence, I must be leaving a larger hole than expected.

While I’ve been off learning,

I’ve also been missing me.

My routines have been broken and forgotten

My learned habits have become memories

And my forgotten habits feel like new toys in a goodwill window

Reminding me how nice they were and yet I have to remind myself why I gave them up in the first place.

The job is almost over and I’ll be emerging a new person.

Worn and in need of rest

In need of an uplift

A cry

And then another blast of energy to keep me going.

I miss me

But I’m never the same

Day after day

I keep growing

And I need to learn how to take care of me

Day after day

Learn my needs for each day and work with them

Care for them

I need to learn to hear myself more then anyone else

Space Room 

Galaxies sparkle

They dance and shimmer

Slide and skate

Stars beam across worlds

Sharing their light

Their energy

Moving constantly

Somersaulting through voids of space

Like a child

Like a breeze

Like water

But it’s light

Energy

Felt but not seen

Corrupting darkness

Emulating

Illuminating

Exuding

Preciousness

The fragility and strength of that energy

Can build and destroy

Light that gives warmth to dust

Dust under pressure form rocks

Through manipulation

Intricate timing

And chance

Galaxies bear the the constant pleasure and pain of life.

“This, too, I carefully explored: Even though the actions of godly and wise people are in God’s hands, no one knows whether God will show them favor. The same destiny ultimately awaits everyone, whether righteous or wicked, good or bad, ceremonially clean or unclean, religious or irreligious. Good people receive the same treatment as sinners, and people who make promises to God are treated like people who don’t. It seems so wrong that everyone under the sun suffers the same fate. Already twisted by evil, people choose their own mad course, for they have no hope. There is nothing ahead but death anyway. There is hope only for the living. As they say, “It’s better to be a live dog than a dead lion!” The living at least know they will die, but the dead know nothing. They have no further reward, nor are they remembered. Whatever they did in their lifetime—loving, hating, envying—is all long gone. They no longer play a part in anything here on earth. So go ahead. Eat your food with joy, and drink your wine with a happy heart, for God approves of this! Wear fine clothes, with a splash of cologne! Live happily with the woman you love through all the meaningless days of life that God has given you under the sun. The wife God gives you is your reward for all your earthly toil. Whatever you do, do well. For when you go to the grave, there will be no work or planning or knowledge or wisdom. I have observed something else under the sun. The fastest runner doesn’t always win the race, and the strongest warrior doesn’t always win the battle. The wise sometimes go hungry, and the skillful are not necessarily wealthy. And those who are educated don’t always lead successful lives. It is all decided by chance, by being in the right place at the right time. People can never predict when hard times might come. Like fish in a net or birds in a trap, people are caught by sudden tragedy.”

Ecclesiastes 9 NLT

I Will Never Again Speak Another Negative Word

I will say I can , instead of I can*t.

It’s no longer a word in my vocabulary.

🖤✌🏾

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