I Want To Get So Thin And Sickly Looking That My Mom Stops Enabling But Makes Me Eat.

REAL, I randomly stop studying just to scroll on tumblr and look through the tags. I also had a phase at some pointwhere I'd be like "it's ok to neglect my studies for a bit. I can't be stupid AND ugly."

does anyone else’s ED severely impact their academics? and not just in an “@na brain” way?

i mean instead of studying or doing online assignments i’m obsessively consuming media related to weight loss/food/dieting.

i feel guilty when i sit down to study or do schoolwork because “i could be burning calories exercising right now.”

food makes me undesirable food makes me undesirable food makes me undesirable food makes me undesirable food makes me undesirable food makes me undesirablefood makes me undesirable food makes me undesirablefood makes me undesirable food makes me undesirable food makes me undesirable food makes me undesirable food makes me undesirable food makes me undesirable food makes me undesirable food makes me undesirablefood makes me undesirable food makes me undesirablefood makes me undesirable food makes me undesirable food makes me undesirable food makes me undesirable food makes me undesirable food makes me undesirable food makes me undesirable food makes me undesirablefood makes me undesirable food makes me undesirablefood makes me undesirable food makes me undesirable food makes me undesirable food makes me undesirable food makes me undesirable food makes me undesirable food makes me undesirable food makes me undesirablefood makes me undesirable food makes me undesirablefood makes me undesirable food makes me undesirable food makes me undesirable food makes me undesirable food makes me undesirable food makes me undesirable food makes me undesirable food makes me undesirablefood makes me undesirable food makes me undesirablefood makes me undesirable food makes me undesirable food makes me undesirable food makes me undesirable food makes me undesirable food makes me undesirable food makes me undesirable food makes me undesirablefood makes me undesirable food makes me undesirablefood makes me undesirable food makes me undesirable

⭐ving so I'm not the "as long as you're happy bro" girlfriend.

Eating multiple course meals <<<<<<<<

I want to be able to look at an overweight person and feel relieved that I don't relate to them and wonder how it can get so bad.

15 hours into a fast, omw to 24 >:)

don't eat don't eat don't eat don't eat don't eat don't eat don't eat don't eat don't eat don't eat don't eat don't eat don't eat don't eat don't eat don't eat don't eat don't eat don't eat don't eat don't eat don't eat don't eat don't eat don't eat don't eat

My favourite part abt fasting is sleeping. Not in a weird way but I love having dinner, doing whatever for a few hours, going to bed and then seeing I'm at like 12 to 14 hours while still feeling good and not hungry.

Rants w Arcane | pt. 2

I know this isn't my usual content, my I just wanted to get it off my chest. Maybe it brings some comfort to ppl in similar situations.

My education is very important to me. My main form of validation is academic, and while I wasn't a top student in high school, I was happy I graduated and found it a flex that I finished high school in a different country, in a different language. Now I'm an university that ranks top worldwide. I knew it wouldn't be easy, but I had failed all my exams in january. Looking back, my study methods were just really not right and that's why I didn't do well. It obviously took a toll on how I viewed myself. Thus, the past semester, I've been in a constant toxic cycle of putting particularly high expecations of what I should do/what I should achieve by overworking myself, attending all my classes and student society (already 9 hours in a day) and studying an extra 4 hours in between and working out whenever I could. On top of that, I had fueled my £d as much as I could, pushing myself to get worse.

Dealing with the pressure of school, an £d, a relationship and going home every weekend where my relationship with my parents isn't the best obviously took its toll on me. After about 4 to 5 months of that, it seems like my brain finally is giving up. My anxiety is getting bad again and I might need meds again, if I don't get better. I don't want to bother people with it, but it is also something I cannot just keep hidden. I hope that things will get better soon and I should take better care of myself.

For anyone else in a similar situation, know you're not alone and you deserve to take care of yourself. It's ok to step on your pride and do things that'll help you feel better.

I can't wait to be done w my exams so i can starve myself properly again