Corvidaecollectibles - Copper Cassius

episode 1

asking "hey is it fine if I smoke in here" and before you're able to answer I've already set up a full rack of salmon over a fire in your living room

I was going to post a stupid pun involving the name of the band Imagine Dragons, but I literally just noticed that my rhyming dictionary lists "Italian" as a word that rhymes with "imagine", and it's completely displaced the original thought in my brain. Italian dragons.

Bucky: Imagine if someone handed you a box full of all the items you have lost throughout your life.

John: Self-esteem, haven't seen you in years!

Yelena: Oh wow, my childhood innocence! Thank you for finding this!

Ghost: I knew I lost that potential somewhere!

Red Guardian: My moral code, is that you?

Bucky: …

Thunderbolts* said the only thing that is going to get us through this truly fucked up timeline is holding on to our equally fucked up friends and getting through this shit together and they were so right for that

this is the funniest thing I’ve read in my LIFE

When you're writing and you suddenly realize you don't know what happens next

Imagine you're driving and someone's stupid little car cuts you off swerving, driving like an absolute dickhead, and you honk at the car in entirely justified anger. Then you get stuck behind the same car at red lights, and while you're there the car's doors slam open, and 35 clowns come out to beat the shit out of your car with comically large mallets that wouldn't do much damage at all if there wasn't 35 of them.

You didn't even do anything wrong. You just disrespected the Holy Papal Clown Gang (not affiliated in any way with the Vatican or the catholic church) and for that they're going to teach you who's doing the fucking honking around here.

i forgot to post this but which one of you lame ass nerds works at my dentists old office

happy Thursday the 20th