59 posts
This is one of the most hilarious things I've seen in awhile 😂😂😂😂😂
I love Tumblr 😂
This is the most Tumblr thing I've ever seen 😂
AHHHHHHHHHH🥵🖤
this song reminds me of bill. i will cry.
anyways i’m writing a fanfic of him based off of it so keep an eye out for that in a few days. i also posted smth earlier so check that out!
i love u guys ^.^
THIS FREAKING PICTURE WILL BE THE DEATH OF ME 🥵😭
stop he’s so cuteness 🥰
😭😂
Weed gummy should cost 50¢ and be sold out of vending machines and at corner stores
Literally me 😂
Am I the only one who thinks putting 'LOL' on something automatically makes it not dark or weird? 😂..... LOL
This is weirdly adorable 🥲
was feeling a bit bonker
This is way too relatable
When you remember how much you love a character you hadn’t thought about in a while
This is BY FAR one of my favorite jake fics 🥵
Summary: Whilst on stream, your viewers ask why you don’t have “smoking fingers” and you provide an answer.
Warnings: reader smokes, reader is intended to be female, one sexual innuendo, pre-established relationship, reader gets nails done, no use of y/n
A/N: i watched a clip thing on tiktok of someone pointing out Jake’s fingers and it’s because of smoking so i thought why not have a cutesy girlfriend not ruin her freshly done nails.
also expect some Johnnie to come up i have three requests and they are actually amazing so tysm for them!!
You were sat on your pink gaming chair, swaying side to side whilst you were beginning your stream. The viewers rolled in quick, as well as the various donations and quick messages.
A message catches your attention, halting your swaying. “Did you get your nails done?” you mutter to yourself as you lean forwards. “Oh yeah! I did.” You lifted your hands up vertically showing off your fresh nails. “Jake took me for my birthday.” You had a cheesy smile on your face as you brought your hands down. You put them under your thighs as your shoulders hunched up at the mere feeling talking about Jake gave you.
“I was going to get them done anyway,” you paused and thought about your incredibly outgrown nails prior. “if you saw my nails before…Wait! did i show you guys?” you rushed to your phone and went through your gallery.
You found the photo Jake had sent you. It was a picture of you squishing his cheeks together with both hands, and you can see how outgrown your nails were. You flipped your phone to the camera, trying different angles so your viewers could see. “Stop focusing on me,” you muttered angrily to your camera. It focused and showed the chat a cute picture of you and your boyfriend, with your outgrown nails.
“Like we took this when we went target, with Johnnie.” You set your phone down and talked with your hands, even more than usual with your nails. “He literally called me over and went,” you took a breath and made your voice higher in irritation to mock Jake’s, “Babe, show me your nails!” you scrunched your face up, then resorted to your natural voice, “And so i did that, he took a picture.” you paused, showing confusion in your face, “I think he put it on instagram, on his story. I swear he did something like that and.. was there a poll on if he should pay for me to get my nails done?”
Looking at the chat you see the confirmation, or the people who were unaware on how bad your nails looked in shock. You rolled your eyes, “Anyways, i have such a cute boyfriend the came with me and payed.” You showed your nails off again.
This time another message caught your attention, “If you smoke why don’t you have ‘smoker fingers’?” You furrowed your brows at the question. “What the fuck is smoker fingers?” You looked down to your keyboard and began to type ‘what is smoker fingers?’.
“Okay Chat, smoker fingers are~” you dragged out the final word, “Yellowish discoloration on the ends of your fingers from holding a cigarette; wait!” you look at your fingers. “Oh i know why!” you were about to answer when you got a phone call from Jake.
“Hello, i’m streaming.” you held up your speaker to the microphone.
“You wanna know why your fingers aren’t yellow?” Jake yelled in irritation.
“Why?” you giggled with your hand over your mouth.
“Because you always make me hold your cigarettes! Look at my fingers!”
“I can’t, we’re not on facetime,” you were proved wrong as he came through your door behind you. You turned around to see him just stood there with a hand on the door handle and the other on his hip.
You look at the camera, then the stream to see what the viewers were seeing. Then you turned to see Jake still in the same position, causing you to lean into your hands that were propped up on your desk and failed to conceal your laughter. Jake then strutted up to the camera and held up his yellowing fingers with nails littered with chipped polish.
“Look! This is what she does, making me hold her cigarettes!” he then turned away from the camera to look at you cracking up and trying to hide in your hands. “What do you have to say about this?” he then held him fingers up to your face.
“Cigarettes are gross,” you spoke in a small voice with a smile on your face as you peered up at him.
“So you have it inside of your body?” Jake questioned and looked down at you.
“Well, i do that with you. Don’t I?”
He stood there in shock and strutted out towards the door, then he turned around with a cock of his hip.
“Never speak to me again!” he spoke in an accent, then went to another accent. (idk how to describe it it’s kinda like a pageant mum?) “Love you, sweetie.” he opened and closed his hand in a wave and left your room, leaving you laughing your ass to your audience.
781 words
These are way too good 🤌
Duff: Where's Axl?
Steven: Doing stuff.
Duff: I don't like the sound of that. Where's Izzy?
Steven: Trying to stop Axl from doing the stuff.
Duff: And Slash?
Steven: Trying to stop Izzy from stopping Axl from doing the stuff.
Duff: I see. And what are you doing here, Steven?
Steven: I'm supposed to stop you from stopping Slash from stopping Izzy from stopping Axl from doing the stuff.
THIS. RIGHT. HERE!
gif by @daryl-dixon-daydreams
Daryl: Ya got stabbed. D’ya remember anythin’?
Y/N: Only the ambulance ride to the hospital.
Daryl: The world ended. Ain’t no ambulances. I carried ya.
Y/N: But I heard a siren.
Daryl: Tha’ was Rick.
Rick: Sorry, I got nervous.
-Everyone at a small gathering in Alexandria-
Carl: If you put 'violently' in front of anything to describe your action, it becomes funnier.
Enid: Violently studies.
Glenn: Violently sleeps.
Maggie: Violently looks over expansion plans.
Spencer: Violently checks out Y/N.
Y/N, looks worriedly between Spencer and Daryl: Violently kisses Daryl.
Daryl: Violently stabs the head lady’s kid.
Rick: Violently worries about the previous statement.
Y/N: Violently takes Daryl home.
Rick: Violently appreciates that.
Carl: Violently wonders how that escalated so quickly.
When vampires are portrayed as mainly preying on women that's so unrealistic like I'm sorry but they're too careful especially around strange men. Dudes are much easier. You could literally lurk in a bush in the park at night and call out "whoa look at this fucked up looking squirrel" and have 3 grown men climb in immediately
These are to funny 🤣
I love this so much 😂
I love this ✋😂
i’d be a terrible superhero i’d be at home and see the signal calling me in the sky and be like “i literally just sat down”
Can I get a waffle, can I PLEASE get a waffle 😑😭