My Dream Aesthetic Is Being Known As A Crazy Scientist, Just Working 24/7 In A Lab

im experiencing jealousy but the kind where im not even sure if its actually jealousy. i dont know whether its longing for how things used to be, or being happy that they've changed. ive spent so long convincing myself to consider them a stranger with who i shared some memories.

so why do i feel myself burning when i see pictures them with other people, why-whenever i see them having fun with other people-do i feel the need to have my friends beside me just to prove a point. i feel like such a middle schooler because opening up ig to see pictures of them at parties and stuff makes me..jealous? angry? sad? bcoz its like those pictures and captions are targeted at me. they're an indirect way of saying i moved on, and im over u. so why am i still not?

why do i feel the need to go to the mall, buy clothes i shouldn't be wearing and take pictures with guys i shouldnt be hanging around with? i thank well, thats exactly what she's doing, i'll just move it up a notch. but despite it all, im still thinking about her. whether its jealousy, anger or sadness-maybe all at once-it's all because of her. and i hate her. but i feel like such a goddamn whiny child. i cant help it.

"this reminded me of you" and "you reminded me of this" is such a warm thing to say to someone or even think because the former is 'i see you in every piece of the world i see' and the latter 'i see the world in you' and they're both so pretty

the end of august/beginning of september smells like a brimming cup of tea, new textbooks, and autumn slowly approaching

Lady Bird, Greta Gerwig / Nothing New (feat. Phoebe Bridgers), Taylor Swift / Party Girls, Malcom Liepke / ribs, Lorde / The Parent Trap, Nancy Meyers / Landslide, Fleetwood Mac / Female Artist, Ernst Ludwig

Online friends are so cute like you'll prolly just say 'hi' and they'll be like 'HEY HI BESTIE I LOVE YOU SO MUCH LET'S GO TO LIBRARIES TOGETHER!!'

are you actually reading for fun or is it to distract your mind from the current state your life is in and to keep you in a blissful fantasy where all the monsters could be slayed and problems could be solved with simply the turn of a page?

hot bitches read depressing romance books & listen to taylor swift

“i light all the candles, cut flowers for all my rooms, i care for myself the way i used to care about you”

have u ever loved a lyric so much that when u hear it feels like ur heart is trying to burst out of ur body

i kinda felt that on a personal level.

i’m so mad bc someone asked me what the last song i’ve listened to and it’s beach boy by knox hamilton and turns out it’s a tiktok song that i didn’t even know was a tiktok song. this is why i hate tiktok i cannot even enjoy music anymore without everyone assuming i got it from tiktok, it’s a plague on society.