And I Will Have To Be My Own:

Also putting this here because you said you wouldn't read it and I have so many things I want to say to you out loud but I can't so the internet is as loud as I can get without saying anything to you directly.

If you do read any of this, know that you do it knowing full well that you told me that you will refuse to participate or be in any of my work or my art moving forward especially If it had to do with recording you.

Because people would understand why you were also confused as to why I didn't see who you really were?

Because I can clock every humans, passions, insecurities, fears and loves and indifference most, within 5 minutes of meeting them because I can repeat people like a book.

And people are transparent like atoms so it either feels like light reading or an audiobook iTune out of.

You hardly know it's there. But it's buzzing in your ear telling you these horrible stories anyways. But also saying how much you love these horrible stories and that's why you're sharing them because you are a horror fan bitch and you know it. And that will get you through the next little while and make you even funnier to yourself. Because you always know how to pull back on references and do callbacks.

It's not your fault. You're big. Picture is a magic eye photo made of tiny little things. Where are you supposed to squint and look at a certain wind? Make really stupid faces to figure it out. But it's still fun and you end up laughing cuz once you do figure it out you realize how cool it is.

My brother made fun of me for not doing it when I was around 6 years old. Because it was something my dad and him enjoyed doing together so much, and he always act like he enjoyed keeping that secret relationship and treat with my dad which really bothered me.

He would also tell me that my mom wasn't my own mom and was only his mom and it would make me cry so hard that I would scream and turn around and we used to laugh at it when we got older but.

Just like every nanosecond has context. Even if you can't see it, I can. And when I'm calling you out it's not because I care about you, but more because I care about you enough to tell the truth. And for the people who I don't talk to, that should be your answer right there.

I'm showing off how much I can write here if I'm inspired, and I'm actually looking forward to moving on to something else cuz I have so many other things I want to think about before this happened.

Adios

G YAMAZAWA – 1990 (Interlude) Lyrics | Genius Lyrics

Genius

G YAMAZAWA – 1990 (Interlude)

[Chorus] / When I was a young boy, and I heard that bass kick / Then I heard that high hat, then I heard that tape deck / Spinnin' like the

I was gonna write more but Labrinth rips too hard so now I just wanna 🌬️ and bop.

Because I can't stop sweating funny thoughts

I just didn't know how much practice I got being sad for 20 years straight... No wonder I find myself funny you fuckin loser

You had no one else to compare to do it's not technically your fault.

But hey look on the bright side! You ended up on

Einsteins

Sorry you weren't allowed to shine like you deserved. You did look amazing btw, I know it's hard to love yourself or even bear it sometimes.

At least you got to enjoy 7 days of it before they pulled the rug out from under you.

At least no one's holding a gun to your head anymore.

Guilt and fear will no longer win.

I hope I can prove through my actions and not my pleas for help anymore, that I am okay.

#betterthan #butneverthesame

I have no idea what North Cack is but as soon as it came on my Spotify (since I left my joycrumb #joy #breadcrumb #hansel #gretel #weird #ass #witch #butmakeher #anauntie #i finally see you now #I too love to gossip girl one day #xoxo

But there's a time to be a black sheep, and a time to reclaim the AUNTIE title. Now I KNOW you KNOW how much I KNOW how much YOU mean to ME.

And #viceversace #thisoneisforthereal #aunties #ogs

I was scared I may be queer-baiting/being performative when dancing like a crazy person, but now I KNOW:

Same same, but different. Just like us

On betrayal

I'll never doubt you

Or see you the same

again.

I was gonna write more but Labrinth rips too hard so now I just wanna 🌬️ and bop.

Because I can't stop sweating funny thoughts

I just didn't know how much practice I got being sad for 20 years straight... No wonder I find myself funny you fuckin loser

You had no one else to compare to do it's not technically your fault.

But hey look on the bright side! You ended up on

It's crazy how you're not even in my top [however many ppl depending on the screen and resolution) anymore.

If I need to message you, I have to go looking for you. I usually try to scroll up and down so I don't have to type it in. Seems like too much effort.

But today I eventually had to because I had to tell you something and then move on with the rest of my day.

So wild. So quick.

One fell swoop

It ain't easy being me.

You'll find someone to cherish you one day like this too 🌚🌝