I Keep Thinking About How Rfk Said That Autistic People "will Never Write A Poem." I Keep Thinking About

i keep thinking about how rfk said that autistic people "will never write a poem." i keep thinking about that, about if humanity is calculated on the back of old verse. how far we measure personhood is in baseball and stanza breaks.

i keep thinking - i have over 7k poems on here alone. language can be a special interest, after all. did you know the word autism comes almost direct from the greek word autos, meaning "self"? self-ism.

maybe he is right - i haven't really played baseball. i was a ballet dancer instead. and besides - my sister once accidentally hit me in the face with an aluminum bat. i'm not sure if the injury gives me half points. am i only a person in the dugout? hand in a mitt? swinging?

does softball count? does cricket? am i a person if i throw the ball to my dog. am i a person as long as the ball is in the air, or do i stop being a person as it rolls into the bushes. i took my girlfriend to fenway recently; was i a person in the sun, with my hands up, with the game laid out at my feet in a diamond. i felt like a person, but that was back in the summer, and i often feel my most person-like then.

am i more of a person because of the sheer number of things i've written? does quality matter, or is it quantity? i used to write entire books every summer in high school - i wasn't doing well. i felt the least like-a-person back then. but then - does any person feel human in high school?

in the library, ink on my skin, i feel personhood shutter at the edges of myself. actually, writing feels blissfully like not being myself. it feels birdlike; escaping into creation so my body dissolves and i survive only by muscle memory. i am not there, i am writing.

but who can deny the falconlike focus of warsan shire, the tenderness of mary oliver, the sheer skill of amanda gorman. those are poets. they are certainly human. you could line them up with the way their words have influenced us and measure their literary shadows like wings.

perhaps it was very assumptive of me to want to be a poet rather than "a [ label ] poet." i wanted the work to fill itself in, rather than be stained by what i am. i do not write in despite of my neurodivergence, i am just neurodivergent and writing.

does the poem have to be in english or can i send it through my palms into the coat of my dog. does the poem have to make sense. does the poem have to love you back.

if i break a glass, will the poem appear naturally? or is the act of breaking the glass human-enough. the shards of my life glittering out beneath me - do i have to write the poem, or is it self-evident in the pile of glass splinters? i cannot grasp this world the way other people can. regardless, i endeavor to touch - even the mess - very gently.

i broke my toenail against my coffee table recently. i released a bug outdoors. i made coffee. i walked my dog.

i didn't write a poem about any of these things.

something else, then. existing without humanity.

More Posts from Studywithelle and Others

3 weeks ago

“You shouldn’t self-ID as ADHD/autistic, you’re turning a very real mental condition into a trend” Ok then stop saying delulu. Stop speculating on which cluster C personality disorder the criminals you hear about on the news have. Stop saying “schizoposting” and “acoustic” and “is it restarted?” Stop using “psycopath” and “sociopath” as catch-all ways of calling someone a bad person. Stop saying “the intrusive thoughts won” when you bleach your hair and then turn your nose up at people who suffer from very real, very scary urges of physical/sexual violence. Stop saying “I’m so OCD” as a way of calling yourself neat. Stop treating BPD/ASPD/Bipolar as inherently abusive. Stop saying “OP I am living in your walls” without tagging for unreality. Stop diagnosing complete strangers you’ve never met on r/AITA with NPD.

You first. If you don’t want our disabilities to be treated like trends then stop belittling and minimising them. I’ll NEVER judge a person for trying find labels for their symptoms when an apathetic, racist, sexist, ableist healthcare system refuses to. But I will absolutely judge a hypocrite. Which a lot of you are

2 weeks ago

propaganda a lot of y’all should fall for:

whispering “thanku” to your tea or coffee before the first sip.

telling your friends you love them when they least expect it. especially then.

googling “what kind of flower blooms twice” at 3 a.m. to feel hopeful again

deleting apps every two weeks and calling it a spiritual reset.

naming your plants like they’re ur friends. apologizing when you forget to water them.

believing ur younger self would still think you’re cool. even on your worst days.

using perfume before bed. for no one. for you.

making eye contact with yourself in the mirror when you cry. giving the pain an audience.

taking selfies when you feel awful. proof you existed even when the light wasn’t flattering :-)

2 weeks ago

btw forgive and forget is a myth, you can forget sure, for your own peace, but forgiveness is not necessary, you are not sanctified by your loving and forgiving nature btw. you can hate forever and its ok <3

(this is about my history teacher)

3 weeks ago

i just wanted to reblog this to clear some stuff up, because a few radfems have reblogged this with their own thoughts.

i was 100% including trans people in this, i meant to write a paragraph on them but it slipped my mind.

but yeah i have heard stories of trans men in academia who got treated better after transitioning, and trans women who got treated worse.

i don't rlly know how to phrase this i just wanted to make the point that this blog is not a safe space for trans-exclusive feminism, i beleive trans women and women and trans men are men.

btw if you say 'i'm just a girl' you are contributing to the negative misogynistic stereotype that women are silly and ditzy and lesser than men. if you say 'girl math' you are contributing to the negative misogynistic stereotypes that girls are not good at maths. if you say 'pink jobs' or 'pink chores' to describe washing the dishes, doing the laundry, and cooking, you are contributing to the negative misogynistic stereotype that women belong at home or in the kitchen.

i personally am a humanities/social sciences student. frankly sciences and maths baffle me. but i love my female friends in architecture, engineering, medicine, maths, physics, and coding. i think they are so smart and cool!

please do not start contributing to the rise of 'humanities are for girls, sciences are for boys' this is bullshit!

also it should not, and quite frankly cannot, be separated from the rise of the arts being seen as 'useless' or 'mickey mouse' degrees. they are defunding the arts! be angry! they are saying that this what women should be studying and then they are making it harder to chose to study it! they are trying to remove women from academia!

also shout out to men in humanities, y'all are important to!

TLDR: women in stem rock, they are defunding the arts in an attempt to remove women from academia, your harmless jokes spawned from tiktok trends actively contribute to negative misogynistic stereotypes

3 weeks ago

babe your suffering is not noble. your self destructive habits do not make you cool. your self loathing does not make you fun to be around. go for a walk. drink some water. wash your hair. i promise you can be happy and loved.

2 weeks ago
a picture of deepthroat and mulder from x-files standing in front of an aquarium. they are facing away from the camera. the subtitles read "if a shark stops swimming, it will die".
ix. my friends all laugh and say i remind them of a shark. if i stop moving i die. if i stop moving, it will catch up with me. if i stop moving, someone will notice the shape of the hole i've been steadily digging. someone will notice - it's bloody, whatever it is i'm so intent on burying.
66 If I relaxed my body now, I'd fall apart. I've always lived like this, and it's the only way I know how to go on living. If I relaxed for a second, I'd never find my way back.

on lurching towards the breaking point

The X-Files (01x17) // tumblr user @/inkskinned // Haruki Murakami, Norwegian Wood

2 weeks ago

insanely late update on how this went but whatever.

☑ tune cello

☑ finish job application for local bookshop

☑ print off emails about work experience

managed to sort out log in so i didn't need to

☑ attend both work experience events today

☑ minimum 40 minutes music practice

literally played three chromatic scales and that was it

☑ try make sure i have to to eat lunch

☑ sort out some files from the stuff i won't need next year

don't even have a good reason i was just being lazy

Also went up to the phone store to see if my phone was nearly fixed which I had been putting off, and I bought myself a boba tea to reward myself, no pics because as above PHONE BROKEN!!

02/06/25

posting this to promise to myself that I will actually get something done today

☑ tune cello

☑ finish job application for local bookshop

☑ print off emails about work experience

☑ attend both work experience events today

☑ minimum 40 minutes music practice

☑ try make sure i have to to eat lunch

☑ sort out some files from the stuff i won't need next year

2 weeks ago

Can we talk about how the idea that STEM and the humanities are mortal enemies with no overlap is actually incredibly harmful and is not only preventing people from pursuing their passions but also part of the reason why the humanities aren’t given their proper respect? No, artists are not all snobby pretentious assholes who think they’re more cultured than everyone else and no scientists are not all emotionless robots who think they’re smarter than everyone else and it’s possible to be an artist and a scientist at the same time. By acting like you have to choose between STEM and humanities we are eliminating thousands of potential careers and causing unnecessary divisions in a time where nothing is more crucial than unity. I’m so tired of people acting like STEM majors are incapable of understanding art and humanities majors are incapable of understanding math when the two fields are crucial to one another. Who would design our architecture if it weren’t for artful engineers? Who would discover the rules of composition? At the end of the day we are all just people trying to learn and make a living, and all of these careers are important to humanity. People can’t say that STEM is more important than humanities if there’s no such thing as STEM vs humanities.

3 weeks ago

why I don't use AI for school work, and I don't think you should either

I have been staunchly against using AI for as long as ChatGPT has been a regularly used tool, not necessarily for moral reasons but for arrogant ones. I firmly beleive that I can write a better essay then a malfunctioning robot. My teacher used it to generate photos of scrabble tiles for a wall display, and despite the prompt spelling the words exactly correctly, ChatGPT spelt them wrong. Why would you want to trust a clearly flawed machine with your grades? However recently the sheer amount of people I see at school using AI and supporting the use of AI is so horrifying to me I felt it was something I needed to talk about

Using ChatGPT prevents you from learning properly. Doing things quickly does not equate to doing them well. I understand how difficult it can be to schedule and make time for everything, but using ChatGPT is just like getting someone else to do your work for you. You will not learn! (Most) teachers are not setting difficult homework for the sole purpose of making things hard for you, they set the work to help you learn and to grow resilience.

People are using it for completely stupid tasks, that they could perform far easier without it. For our English Portfolio Essays the SQA requires us to have a certain amount of sources and so many people asked ChatGPT to find them articles. It was ridiculous and slightly horrifying. Have we lost the ability to simply look things up for ourselves? Or to, god forbid, read a real book? Do not use ChatGPT for tasks that could be performed to a higher level if you simply did them yourself! My mother has a friend who marks Advanced Higher Biology Assignments for the SQA, she recently marked one that had 30 references, none of which were right! ChatGPT is not a good tool!

Yes it can save time, but what would you do with the extra time? and surely there are other ways of saving that time. Don't use it to help format emails, there are human made email templates available online, don't use it to help find quotes, you can just search them up yourself on a normal search engine, whatever ChatGPT does for you, there will be an honest hardworking person willing and able to do for you, please go to them instead. If ChatGPT saves you fifteen minutes a day is that really worth it? and if it saves more time then what do you do with that extra time? scroll tiktok? watch netflix? you are not saving time you are wasting your life!


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3 weeks ago

What prompts you to write poetry?

honestly i don't really have a good answer for this. i'm not even sure what i write qualifies as poetry, it's most just my ramblings to myself. i just think of lines or concepts i want to write and then write it. poetry isn't something we get asked to write in our english classes, so i don't write very much. but every now and again i think of a line and then the rest of the poem just kind of writes itself? in my head?

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studywithelle - elle studies
elle studies

16, about to finish my second last year of schooli want to study english and then do a law conversiondream uni is oxfordi write shitty poetry and post motivational content'fodere in terra difficile est, sed in sepulchrum tuum fodere facile est'

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