Same

This one

I dont get it is there supposed to be a twist that i missed

I’ve had my dog since the day I was born

by reddit user inaaace

Ok, now that I’m writing this I can see how strange it is that I’ve had my dog for almost 31 years, but when you live with something every day of your life, it’s kinda normal, you know? I mean, sure, it crossed my mind here and there that, hey, how come Snoop is 20, 24, 26 years old, but I never gave it extensive thought. Good nutrition and daily exercise is what I’d say and move on. It wasn’t impossible, right?

Keep reading

Twenty Øne Piløts

*two thieves walk in the store wearing ski masks*

Me: oh mY GOD IM A HUGE FAN CAN I GET A PICTURE

Look mom I'm popular

OH MY GOD

Puppy trying to go down stairs for the first time

Ok time for bed

Does anyone else remember this pop song from around 2008?

by reddit user hartijay

I used to work on my university campus radio station in college. We used to talk about current events around the school, any news around the surrounding town, and played requested songs for students, something our school surprisingly allowed. I remember a very weird couple of months where students who tuned into the show constantly requested a song called “See You After, Babe”, a pop song by some one-hit-wonder group called Symmetry Icon, the dumbest name for a band I’ve ever heard. But that song was huge around October and November of 2008. As one of the campus radio’s DJs, I had to play that song over like a hundred times in two months. I heard it everywhere, in malls, gas stations, on real radio stations, and I think even on MTV.

Something was weird about that song, but I couldn’t remember exactly what. I tried Googling the song and band, but nothing came up in the results for either. Not even YouTube had a single clip of the song.

Keep reading

A couple of months ago, my friend’s cousin (a single mother) bought a new cell phone. After a long day of work, she came home, placed her phone on the counter, and went watch to TV; her son came to her and asked if he could play with her new phone. She told him not to call anyone or mess with text messages, and he agreed.

Keep reading

do you like harry potter because you can slytherin my bed

my younger cousin’s favorite quote is “mamma mia that is a spicy meatball” and he says it all the time and earlier we went outside to play basketball and he tripped and fell over the uneven concrete and i was about to say are you ok when i heard “mamma mia that is a spicy sidewalk”

YES LADIES PLEASE DONT BUY THINGS YOU NEED FOR NORMAL BODILY FUNCTIONS AROUND US GUYS.