Your Mom Told You That Her Phone Didnt Get Service At Her New Boyfriends House, So She Gave Him Your

Your get a text from your moms phone after not seeing her all night.

phone: Hey, is this Sheila’s son?

you: Yes, whos this?

phone: Your mom fell asleep at my place. I spilled some beer on her at the club so we came back to wash her clothes. We cuddled while we waited. One thing lead to another and things got really sweaty.

mom: … ok, when will she be home?

phone: Idk, I had to re wash her clothes cause they sat in the wash all night. Plush, she's still spent from last night. Just look at her.

He sent this pic.

Mom: Honey, You know how I have a little crush on that new neighbor of ours right? Well I found out he loves tattoos! So I´m gonna send him a pic of mine. I think this one is pretty good. Since you cant see it all in the pic, Im gonna slide my shorts down and give him a peek when we work out at his place again. 

You thought it was inappropriate that the guys in your town would send your mom underwear for her birthday. You thought it was REALLY inappropriate when shed send them pics of her modeling them.

Your mom can never turn down a dare, so when your friends dared her to set this as her profile picture, she couldn't refuse. Now, she has almost a thousand new friends and lost her job. But it's ok, she makes more than enough selling selfies online and being a cam girl. You should know, it's your job to tell her what different poses they guys are requesting. You make $50 an hour, but it might not be worth it having to stare at guys jerking off looking at your undressing mom every day.

Since shes discovered Facebook, your mom has developed a selfie addiction. At the same time, after they friended her, the men in your town became chronic masurbators. Im sure its just a coincidence.

your mom texting your friend Mom: 'See? I still got my tan lines from last summer.' Friend: 'Damn, you're right. I can't believe they're still there.' M: 'If you think thats bad, the ones on my ass are way more noticeable.' F: 'Haha really? Get them panties off and take a pic from the back, I gotta see this.' M: 'Only if you promise to make it your wallpaper;)' F: 'Deal 🍑💦👅'

Other women

Would anyone object to captions about sisters and girlfriends? That opens up the possibility of more content.

You were proud of your mom for going to the gym more, but you wish she didnt post pics of her sweat covered ass on instagram. 

Almost 20 minuets after your mom posted a pic of herself in a blue dress to Facebook, you were flooded with friend requests. You thought it was weird that all these guys wanted to talk about your mom, but you didn’t have too many friends so it was nice to talk to someone for a change. Every conversation went the same. They’d show you the original pic and tell you how hot they thought she was, and ask for more. You don’t know why but you immediately sent more shots. Luckily you had some from past vacations. You’d tell them story’s about her, like the time she spilled wine on her dress at a cocktail party and had to wear just the hosts old tshirt the rest of the night, or the time you had company over and she sprinted naked from the shower to her room. They all seemed to love her pics and your story’s so you just kept going, even with 17 chats going at one time. Then something weird happened, you’d send the pic of her in her underwear when she had to be a “sexy attendant” at a car dealership one day, and they’d say “thanks” and immediately stop responding. It’s ok though, they still message you every night for more story’s and pics, and you couldn’t be happier with your new pen pals.

I was so excited that my mom was gonna visit me at college. I haven’t seen her in almost a year, and now she was gonna stay with me for a whole two weeks! The first day was great, and she loved meeting my frat brother Mike. She even insists on sleeping in his room. She explained he has a really comfy bed, and loved how his sheets smell. Plus his room has a bathroom in it, so she wouldn’t have to get dressed right away after a shower. The last thing I want is to see her naked after a shower, so I’m more than happy to make mike deal with that. On her first night I was worried she’d feel out of place, but mike sent me a pic of her fast asleep in one of his nightshirts.

It’s been 5 days, and now I hardly see them at all! The only time I see mom is when she posts on snapchat, mostly shots from his bed. She told me Mike bought her a special pair of pjs she can wear for the rest of her visit. How thoughtful! Moms really getting the hang of college life too. Yesterday, I walked into mikes room and saw my mom kneeling in front of him with his shorts around his ankles, his back facing me. She quickly explained that she was practicing her pantsing skills. She was wearing her special pjs too, and they had cream splattered across her chest, and some on her chin. I guess he pranked her too. I quickly left so they could get back to their fun. I’m so glad my mom and frat brother get along this great!