Telltale Heart Valentine

Monster fucker this, monster fucker that. What if I want a monster RELATIONSHIP huh?! Monster HAND HOLDING, monster INTIMATE CONVERSATIONS, monster COMFORTABLE SILENCE??

TIL that hard disks are so sensitive to vibration, that just screaming at them diminishes their performance

via reddit.com

It has the same energy as "fuck it, we ball" except calmer.

I think we should add Pratchett’s Law to the list of things like Murphy’s Law until it’s a household adage because currently no one is doing it like *shrug emoji* “Things Just Happen, What The Hell” and someone needs to be

reblog to give a girl in need an unlimited supply of blueish green oval shaped tablets with b imprinted on the front and 8872 on the back

Should my body be making those sounds at 23? Probably not.

My body is a crumbling castle of sand and I don't know when the tide will roll in.

Memento Mori

Turn based sex. Take as long as you need to think of a strategy.

If something is ‘old as fuck’ then it’s about 1.2 billion years old because that’s when life evolved sexual reproduction.

the existence of the word "gock" suggests the possibility of a male equivalent, which would naturally be called a "mock".

A Dark Souls-like game where the lore for a weapon gets less vague the more you upgrade it. Broken Blade: A brittle sword. You can’t seem to let it go. Unpolished Blade: A cherished weapon from ages past. Polished Blade: You remember something. Bride’s Blade: Your wife’s sword.