Something About How Atsushi Can Trek Through The Past And The Future When All He Wants Is To Go Back

BDUBS THE THING (1982) DUB LIVE IN THE YOUTUBE COMMENTS

Just saw a comment that said in that moment Akutugawa realised someone thought he deserved to live.

I’m done.

No because… because Akutugawa like Atsushi has always wanted that kind of approval.

And Atsushi may not have died but even he knew it was all a hunch at that point when he pushed Akutugawa aside.

He saved him.

Used his own words against him because back on the boat Akutugawa decided that Atsushi deserved to live.

And now Atsushi’s decided he should too.

i want someone to explore atsushi’s relationship with food and going from barely eating anything and then starving to being able to eat whenever like idk much about anything human body related tbh

but is going from starving to having a healthy diet that easy ?

matching profile pictures 😻😻

If Atsushi gets sent to the Port Mafia after this good luck to them.

Honestly I don’t think anyone is equipped for this except maybe Kouyou because of Chuuya. And Hirotsu because he’s Hirotsu.

Everyone would be expecting the strong sassy weretiger that takes no shit and regularly fights one of their higher ups.

They’re gonna get a broken boy who wants just wants to go home. A shell of who he was because everything died with the Agency.

Mori pauses mid speech because Atsushi’s just looking at him with blank empty eyes that feel all too familiar. But even those eyes were cold, there was life in them.

Dazai walked those halls with purpose and an ill fitting coat. While Atsushi wanders like a lost soul.

Akutagawa stays firmly at his side. He doesn’t fight him even if he does try to stir up their old banter. He didn’t fight Atsushi the day the Headmaster died and he won’t now.

He just hopes Atsushi doesn’t become like the lost boy from the slums.

One of the rare times Atsushi speaks its to ask Akutagawa why wait 6 months? Akutagawa simply shakes his head saying he won’t go back on his word.

Which is true but also because he would gain nothing from fighting a man who wants to die. And maybe he doesn’t want to kill Atsushi after all.

Atsushi who takes whatever he’s given without a word. He hugs his old clothes like a plushi as he sleeps in the back of the linen closest. Because he refuses to use the room they provided him. It’s not his so he won’t act like it.

He fights on autopilot but he’s never put on a major job. Probably because they’re afraid of what he might do.

Q taunts him but Atsushi doesn’t bat an eye because there’s nothing Q can show him that’s worse than what he’s seen. All he can do is taunt Atsushi with things his mind already does.

The only hope Atsushi has that he clings onto is that he can save them.

No one in the Port Mafia will ever forget the day some dared to insult the Agency in Atsushi’s presence. No ons saw him move. No one saw him activate his ability. Everyone heard the scream and the sound of claws digging into flesh.

Even Akutagawa was taken aback. This made the Shibusawa fight look almost peaceful in comparison.

‘Talk about my friends again, and the next time I won’t miss.’ Hisses Atsushi coldly. He throws the person to the ground like rubbish and walks out the door.

His hands are shaking as blood trickles down his claws.

Kinda wild how Atsushi has suffered throughout his entire life both in and out of the orphanage.

How he was abused and almost killed at least twice during his childhood and was abandoned by his parents.

But than Atsushi has what? Two maybe three good days before the Port Mafia show up. And suddenly people expects him to not be traumatised by his past.

His past he was still experiencing up until 2 weeks ago.

You know everyone else is allowed to have traumatic events that happened years ago and still be traumatised by those events.

Unless you’re Atsushi.

Odasuku died 4 years ago and that’s when Dazai left the Port Mafia.

The Flags died 6 years ago.

But Chuuya, Akutagawa and Dazai are all allowed to still grieve those events in the present.

As they should be because that’s how trauma works.

Atsushi has been abused for 18 years. He was kicked out the orphanage and was homeless for 2 weeks where he was on the brink of death.

He just learned he had an ability and then has to reconcile with how and why he forgot about that.

All alone.

And that’s just the shit Atsushi lets us know about.

But no he needs to get over it apparently.

Morally Grey in a World of Black and White

"Every villain is a hero in their own mind."

-Tom Hiddleston

Face down in the dirt was not an ideal way to wake up at all. Chuuya would argue that there were a million other ways an places to wake up that were better than face down in the dirt. One such example would be in a bed, maybe on his side, in a hotel. The best case would let him know where he was. As it now stood, he had no idea where the hell he was.

Normally, in a situation such as this, the logical thing to do would be to get a proper bearings and stock of the situation at hand. Gathering intel should be top priority. How one goes about doing that varies from situation to situation. However, a groan on Chuuya's left had him turning to see what was going on.

Also face down in the dirt, a few feet away, was a kid he'd never met before, but that didn't stop him from recognising him. The kid had a very monochrome colour palette for being a part of the Armed Detective Agency. Chuuya had seen the kid's picture before because of the bounty that had been on his head, and he'd seen an illusion of him at the hospital not even a week ago, but he'd never met the kid. Jinko, for that was what he knew the kid to be called, was Dazai's new protegee. Was that a good thing? Probably not, but that also lead him to hold high expectations of the kid. He was being taught by Dazai Osamu, so the kid had to be at least as skilled as Akutagawa had been when he was under Dazai!

Much like a cat, the kid stretched out on the grass as if basking in the sun before he stiffened and looked over at Chuuya. He didn't make a sound.

Chuuya smirked smugly, "Have a nice nap, Jinko?"

The kid flinched ever so slightly at something before shaking his head, "Where..?"

"No idea."

"Hm." The two let the silence take over again. They'd never interacted before now, so they didn't have much to go off of.

A quick scan of the area alerted the two to no other human presences. There didn't seem to be any animals either. It was weird. Not weird in the way that Yokohama could bost, but weird in the way that there was probably something happening around them that they couldn't figure out yet. It was kind of like the feeling that they both got when Dazai was scheming, but this was somehow worse.

Still holding the distance between themselves, the two made no move to face each other. Chuuya quietly noted the use of common sense in the detective. They'd been enemies not a week ago, but they were the only familiar thing around. Better to have their backs to each other than to the unknown around them.

Jinko hissed something that Chuuya couldn't quite make out before he was pulling him into the tree line. "What the hell?" Chuuya glared.

Jinko shushed him before whispering, "Someone's coming." And wasn't that just swell. Though, Chuuya had to admit that the kid had good instincts. He hadn't even heard anyone coming yet!

A few minutes of hiding in the bushes, there was a break in the plants opposite where the two hid and a kid with - was that green? - green hair stumbled into the clearing. They were obviously injured, but not bleeding. Honestly, they didn't look like a threat at all. As they fell to the ground and pulled out a notebook, they were seeming less like a potential threat and more like and injured bunny.

If Chuuya was confidant in his intel on the ADA, then he knew that the kid beside him would not let this injured bunny be.

Predictably, the were-tiger left the bushes to talk to the kid. Unpredictably, he kept his distance and seemed guarded in a way he hadn't been before. Was it because this green haired kid was a new variable in a new equation? Probably, but that didn't make sense. Jinko was guarded against the kid like he was ready to run, but he'd left his back open to Chuuya, a known enemy.

Enemy wasn't the right word. The Port Mafia and the Armed Detective Agency had a truce, but it was shaky at best. It would take a while for all parties to get out of the headspace of what was basically an attack on sight order. Hostile was a better word to use when describing their current relationship.

"Hey," the were-tiger said, his voice soft but his stance was ready for a fight.

The green haired kid startled and looked up at the grey haired kid with wide eyes. They looked ready to run and cry at the same time. It was pathetic. It would get them killed in Yokohama.

"Hey," the were-tiger tried again, this time he lowered himself to the ground with his hands up in surrender. It was a compromising position should he need to fight or run. Chuuya shook his head. Maybe Dazia wasn't doing a good job teaching the kid. "I'm a bit lost, could you help me?"

The kid relaxed a bit when Jinko didn't come any closer to him. "Y-yeah. You're in Musutafu in the Chubu Prefecture of Japan."

That...was not where Chuuya last remembered being. He was fairly certain that that wasn't were Jinko last remembered being, either. The situation just got a bit more complicated.

To Jinko's credit, he took the information in stride. "Huh. Cool. I've never been here before," he said, "Could you tell me more about it?"

The green haired kid was almost completely relaxed now and Jinko risked scooting closer. The kid made no move to get away, so Chuuya made himself comfortable. He had the feeling this was going to be a long conversation.

~~~

Atsushi really wanted to wake up from whatever not-dream he was having now. He was certain that he'd fallen asleep in the closet last night after bid Kyoka a good night. So how in world had he gotten here?! And with Nakahara-san of all people! He was glad that the Port Mafia Executive hadn't attacked him when his back was turned. He was also a bit relieved to realize that they were both confused about what was going on.

The kid with green - honest to god, the kid had green hair! - hair was helpful, if not skittish. Not that Atsushi could blame them. Though, they were very forthcoming with information, so that was a good thing. It was a good thing that could get them killed in Yokohama.

Nakahara-san had stayed hidden in the bushes while he talked to the kid. He was glad for that. He'd never officially met Nakahara-san, but he'd heard stories from Dazai and whisper's in dark alleyways. Nakahara-san was a force to be reckoned with and Atsushi was beyond glad that they weren't currently trying to kill or otherwise maim each other.

To Atsushi, Nakahara-san was an intimidating person. He couldn't imagine how this kid would feel should the man come out of hiding suddenly.

Either way, he was gathering information from his only current source. He found out where they were, what time it was, a basic layout of the surrounding area, and some landmarks to look for. Most of it was tourist stuff, but it would be useful to him nonetheless. He wasn't anywhere near being a good detective and was still technically an intern at the Agency, but he'd read enough books as a kid - when he could - and asked Kunikida enough questions to know a bit of what he was doing.

He also was given some extra information that he hadn't been after. The kid's - male, he'd realized and quietly confirmed - name was Midoriya and he was in his final year before high school. Smart of the kid to not give away his first name. It was a Friday and schools in the Chubu prefecture had just let out for the weekend.

"I better get going," Midoriya gathered his things and stood up. Atsushi did so as well. "My mom will be wondering where I am soon.

"I understand," Atsushi smiled. He really didn't, but that would only bring up uncomfortable questions that he didn't really have enough training to lie his way through. "Have a safe trip home."

"I will, thank you, Nakajima-san," the kid bowed, "You as well!" Then he was gone.

It was quiet for a minute before the bushes behind him rustled. He didn't bother turning around because he knew who was at his back. Was this a good show of trust? He'd find out in a minute.

"Nice job, were-tiger." Nakahara-san walked closer to him, "I guess they are teachin' ya something at the ADA."

Now is when he turned to face the Port Mafia Executive. "Thanks, Nakahara-san."

The man raised an eyebrow. "How'd ya know my name?"

He shrugged minutely to feign indifference. "Dazai-san likes to talk when he's procrastinating."

Nakahara-san huffed a laugh, "Yeah, that sounds about right."

Another bout of quiet overtook them as the sun set. Finally, Atsushi said, "We're a bit away from home."

"Yeah."

Yokohama was their home. They worked against each other in the past, and are likely to in the future, but Yokohama was their home. It was their place to protect and serve in their own ways. Yokohama was also an independent city-state. It's boarders had been closed long before they'd even been born. Based on what Midoriya had said, they were very much outside of Yokohama. They didn't know what could get them killed here.

"Have you ever been outside the boarders?" Atsushi asked. He suddenly felt very small as he wrapped his arms around his torso and sunk into himself a bit.

"Never." Nakahara-san answered. He suddenly didn't seem as imposing as before.

"Oh."

Storyboard Part 2

hc anytime someone calls aku an annoying emo bitch atsushi pops up to correct them that he's an annoying GOTH bitch

GUYS

Y’all honestly need to give more love to atsushi bc he’s underrated in his OWN SHOW.

“But he’s a boring mc-“ Nuh Uh

He’s literally connected to the book somehow, his ability can literally rip other abilities to shreds,

Plus the theories on how he ended up in the orphanage and how much else he doesn’t even know happened to him bc he somehow forgot LITERALLY GETTING TORTURED BY SHIBUSAWA.

(My hc is that the headmaster definitely forced atsushi to be a cannibal-)

Like, his character is genuinely so interesting, and he’s one of the most mysterious characters in the show.

Same w Byakko. Like, an entirely sentient ability? Hello?

Plus all the shit w the headmaster?

And yet people say he’s boring… 😐