Don’t Invite Me Unless These Are The Plans

15

it must suck to do an assassinate and have everyone cheering you on and hyping you up cuz you can’t tell anyone you did it. you have to keep that information to yourself.

There's an open pit in the middle of our office plan that drops down into a bunch of very sharp spikes that kill you instantly. This is bad. People keep falling in there and dying. Someone put a sign up, the other day, all bright yellow so you can't miss it, that says "Beware!!! Spikes!!!"

The office immediately split into two factions over it. One says that if anyone falls in the spike pit it's their own fault for being so stupid and not watching where they're walking, so we should remove the sign. The other says that the sign is an insult, there shouldn't be a spike pit in our office at all, and having the sign up like that is just normalising the existence of the spike pit, so we should remove the sign.

We ended up removing the sign. Probably for the better. Still... for a while there it looked like it might have worked...

x

went to the pub for a drink on my first real day off in over a week and watched the girl behind the bar drop the entire cash drawer on the floor in the middle of the rush and then just stare at it at her feet for like a solid two minutes

My current favourite tiktok trend is the one where people wrap presents to look like something they're not and some people get ridiculous with it

Like:

✨The dedication ✨

we usually think of mood as a scale from 1-5, but there's actually a negative scale too, where the frown turns back into a smile, but just a little insane !