Marchesaofthemountains - Marchesa Of The Mountains

Hayao Miyazaki

Ways to Cultivate Self-Love

Practice self-compassion: Treat yourself with kindness and understanding, just as you would someone you love.

Practice self-care: Prioritize your physical, emotional, and mental well-being. Take time for relaxation, get enough sleep, eat nutritious food, exercise, and pursuing hobbies or activities that make you happy.

Set healthy boundaries: Assert your needs, desires, and limits. Establish clear boundaries in your relationships and communicate them assertively. Saying no when necessary and honoring your boundaries helps protect your well-being.

Practice mindfulness: Be present in the current moment and non-judgmentally observe your thoughts and emotions. Mindfulness can help you develop self-awareness, reduce stress, and cultivate a deeper understanding of yourself.

Challenge self-limiting beliefs: Challenge negative thoughts and self-beliefs that hold you back from self-love and personal growth. Replace them with positive and empowering affirmations.

Surround yourself with positivity: Surround yourself with people who uplift and support you. Minimize contact with those who bring negativity or undermine your self-esteem.

Practice gratitude: Regularly express gratitude for the positive aspects of your life, as well as your own strengths and achievements. Keeping a gratitude journal can help shift your focus toward self-appreciation and increase your overall sense of well-being.

Celebrate your wins: Celebrate your accomplishments, no matter how small they may seem. Recognize your efforts, progress, and achievements, and take pride in them. Doing this reinforces a positive self-image and boosts self-confidence.

Practice self-acceptance: Embrace and accept yourself fully, including your flaws, imperfections, and past mistakes. Realize that no one is perfect, and that self-love involves accepting and embracing your whole self, including both your strengths and areas for growth.

Focus on self-care rituals: Engage in regular self-care rituals that make you feel nurtured and valued. Take long baths, practice yoga or meditation, journaling, creative activities, or spending time in nature. Find what activities make you happy and make them a priority.

Embrace self-expression: Explore ways to express yourself authentically. This could be, engaging in creative activities like art, writing, music, or dance.

Practice forgiveness: Forgive yourself for past mistakes and let go of any self-blame or guilt that may be holding you back. Making mistakes is a part of being human, use these experiences as opportunities for growth and learning.

Celebrate self-care milestones: Celebrate the progress you make in your self-love journey. Set small achievable goals for self-improvement and celebrate when you reach them. This helps build self-confidence.

Surround yourself with positive influences: Surround yourself with people who inspire and uplift you. Invest in relationships that support your growth, well-being, and self-love. Distance yourself from individuals or environments that consistently bring you down or undermine your self-worth.

Practice self-empowerment: Take control of your life and make choices that align with your values, desires, and aspirations. Set goals and take steps towards achieving them.

Engage in self-reflection: Reflect on your thoughts, emotions, and behaviors. Incorporate journaling, meditation or mindfulness exercises. Self-reflection helps you gain insight into yourself, your patterns, and your needs, enabling you to make intentional choices aligned with self-love.

Be your own advocate: Stand up for yourself and your needs. Speak up assertively when you feel disrespected or when your boundaries are crossed. Express your opinions, asserting your rights, and asking for what you need in various areas of your life.

girl, lock in! 📓🍵🩰

UP your water intake! no more bloating here.

7-10k steps a day. move. your. body — walk, chores, park farther. don’t take shortcuts, do it all!

probiotics, protein, fiber.

prioritize whole foods.

educate yourself for an hour a day. NO EXCUSES. listen to podcasts/youtube videos/audiobooks. read an article or book. learn how to cook better or take care of your skin type. just learn something! don’t let your brain be wasted away. it CRAVES growth.

HAVE ADMIN DAYS. make your to do lists, set 3 priority tasks and set 15-20 minutes of uninterrupted time to tackle them. boom.

stop aimlessly shopping. you have everything to need to live. save up! your future self will thank you.

how to balance work and personal life???

Plan your days & week around your energy peaks: Figure out the times of the day when you're most focused, productive, creative, fidgety, sleepy, etc., and structure your days/weeks/month around your internal clock to the best of your ability. While this may be slightly difficult if you have a 9-5 or go to school during the day, think about what blocks of time are best dedicated to meetings, creative work, planning, routine tasks, emails, studying, etc. For those with uteruses, consider your energy throughout your cycle to help you plan the month.

Create "bookend" routines: While these will often be your morning and nighttime routines, consider how you prime and unwind your mind from your biggest tasks of the day (for most of us, this will be work, school, and chores on the weekends). Some reading, light movement, and upbeat music can create momentum before starting your daily tasks. A long walk and some journaling are a simple yet productive combination to decompress from the day.

Embrace the power of 3s: Create a daily primer routine, workday, and relaxation routine around 3 core tasks/projects/rituals. For example: Mornings can include using your 5-Minute Journal, doing a quick 10-minute meditation/yoga/dancing session to get in some movement, and spending 10 minutes reading; Your workday should be focused on completing your "Big Three" tasks, projects, or meetings of the day; Evenings can include a quick 5-10 minute planning session for the next day, a 15-60 minute walk or workout (depending on how you're feeling), and some journaling/reading time after dinner. You don't need to do it all. Consistency is key.

Make A Life Admin Schedule (and Stick To It): Choose days (and times if possible) of the week to update certain spreadsheets, batch reply to less urgent messages, clean your house, do laundry, grocery shop, etc. Scheduling these tasks ahead of time eliminates half of the battle for following through on what you need to do. Eventually, you will make these tasks into habitual routines that your brain will allow you to execute effortlessly as though you're in autopilot mode.

Focus on systems, not habits: Consider the domino effect of each practice and activity. Determine whether your current strategies and routines align with your energy, goals, and desired outcomes. Reflect on the parts of your routine that increase/decrease your energy and motivation. See how you can create a system – a pattern of consistently-practiced habits – that supports your goals and desired lifestyle that does not compromise your overall life satisfaction and well-being.

Set Boundaries: Understand your expectations, non-negotiables, and limits in every area of your life. Communicate these principles to others clearly, so they know when they are overstepping. Don't tolerate disrespect, but also don't expect others to be mind-readers. If someone knows that they're crossing your boundaries, it is easy to draw the line in the sand and walk away without the guilt or shame that can arise when conflicts originate from a lack of healthy communication.

Incorporate One Creative Practice Into Your Week: Reinvigorate your mind by engaging in at least one hour of creative activity per week. Try drawing, creative writing, poetry, singing, dancing, painting, pottery, jewelry making, graphic design, photography, etc. Even taking a foreign language course or creating a Pinterest inspiration/mood board or organizing your home/closets in an aesthetically-pleasing way counts. Figure out what creative outlet(s) you find satisfying. Prioritize scheduling this practice into your schedule weekly.

Give Yourself A Weekly "Treat": Find a healthy indulgence that you can strategically incorporate into your week. This "treat" can be a massage or nail appointment, permission to watch a movie or a couple episodes of a TV show, a serving of your favorite dessert or a glass of wine, etc. Life is meant to be enjoyed. Consider regular indulgence as an act of self-care not as a sign of weakness or self-destruction. Embracing pleasure does not require guilt or external permission.

Experiment until you find an achievable balance: Focus on progress, not perfection. While there may be days or even seasons where hard work and fewer pleasures take priority, life is meant to bring you joy, peace, and satisfaction at the end of the day. Remaining in your comfort zone does you no good. However, learning ways to find pleasure in the process remains the key to long-lasting discipline and the energy necessary to maintain the determination required for success.

you're smart enough to know the difference between resting and rotting. you'll be happier when you choose to spend your time off restoring your energy and preparing for the next busy day instead of oversleeping and mindlessly consuming content.

be addicted to real dopamine

be in the present and notice those little things you never saw before, but that have always been there

experience new exciting things that bring you joy

love people, listen to them and create meaningful connections

make art and don’t label it as “good” or “bad,” just let your soul be free

stop scrolling on social media and start turning pages of an interesting book

do mindfulness meditation and feel your body and mind calming down

move your body, no matter how as long as you’re enjoying

listen to music that matches the moment you’re in

eat nourishing food, feel your stomach full without discomfort

get a good night of sleep and feel yourself ready for another day

40 Examples of Self Abandonment 🤕👎💭💔

Self-abandonment means not taking care of yourself, your needs, and your feelings. It's like ignoring what's good for you and not being kind to yourself normally in a way that benefits everyone but you.

Not eating well or exercising.

Pretending to be happy when you're not.

Working too much without breaks.

Staying in a bad relationship.

Letting people use you.

Forgetting about things you enjoy.

Not saying what you want.

Always doing things for others.

Not asking for help when you're sad or stressed.

Being alone when you need friends.

Saying mean things to yourself in your head.

Giving up your dreams for others.

Avoiding problems instead of solving them.

Never taking time to relax.

Ignoring how you look or feel.

Not asking for help when things are too hard.

Trying to be perfect all the time.

Doing things that hurt you, like drugs or danger.

Changing who you are to fit in.

Not being yourself and doing what others want.

Ignoring your body when it needs rest or sleep.

Letting others make decisions for you all the time.

Keeping your feelings bottled up inside.

Surrounding yourself with people who bring you down.

Not pursuing your interests or hobbies.

Saying "yes" to everything, even when you're overwhelmed.

Putting up with disrespect or mistreatment from others.

Not giving yourself credit for your accomplishments.

Skipping important appointments or check-ups.

Holding onto grudges and negative emotions.

Comparing yourself unfavorably to others.

Not taking breaks when you're stressed.

Neglecting your financial well-being and overspending.

Ignoring signs of burnout or exhaustion.

Avoiding seeking help for mental health struggles.

Ignoring your own intuition and gut feelings.

Overcommitting and spreading yourself too thin.

Constantly seeking validation from others.

Letting fear hold you back from trying new things.

Dwelling on past mistakes and not forgiving yourself.

don't spend all day neglecting the things that matter most in favor of mindless activities. the grades you want, the skills you desire, the job you'd kill for, the body you want, the beauty routine that would change everything, the books you want to read, the life you want to live is so much more important. years will go by and you'll look up, barely being able to remember specific things you wasted time on but you will certainly be able to name everything you missed out on with ease. all that time wasted with nothing to show for it. don't do it to yourself. prioritize the good life you want and never let it play second fiddle to all of the distractions.

Femme Fatale Guide: Tips On How To Be A High-Value Woman

Table of Contents:

Prioritize Your Self-Respect Above All Else

Set & Uphold Clear Boundaries in Every Area of Life

Make A Deliberate Effort To Discover Your Values, Passions, & Boundaries

Build A Strong Personal Brand & Cult of Personality

Center All Aspects of Your Health & Well-Being

Read, Study, & Build A Strong Skillset

Consistently Invest in Your Appearance

Remain Dedicated To Lifelong Learning

Personalize Your Interactions & Learn Proper Etiquette

Master The Art of Engaging Conversation

Become Extremely Discreet Yet Utterly Shameless

Embrace Growth Without Succumbing To Your Perfectionist Expectations

HOW TO BE A HIGH-VALUE WOMAN:

Prioritize Your Self-Respect Above All Else: Get goals and standards that align with your needs in every area of life (career, finances, physical/mental/sexual health, emotional well-being, friends, family, intimate relationships, self-development). Express and act in alignment with your standards and dreams. Don't allow the displeasure of others to dictate your actions or daily activities.

Set & Uphold Clear Boundaries in Every Area of Life: State them calmly and clearly. "No" is a complete sentence. Reciprocate this effort to others. Practice the art of discernment, differentiation, and interdependence. Get to know yourself, and learn how to observe your needs independently of others' expectations and desires.

Make A Deliberate Effort To Discover Your Values, Passions, & Boundaries: Figure out what matters most to you in life. What activities, topics, aesthetics, art, clothing, hobbies, sounds, movements, books, television shows, movies, songs, and types of conversations most light you up inside? Here are some resources to guide your self-discovery journey HERE, HERE, and HERE.

Build A Strong Personal Brand & Cult of Personality: I have more tips on building your personal brand, creating your persona (or ‘Dream Girl archetype’), and an ultimate Femme Fatale playbook linked HERE, HERE, and HERE.

Center All Aspects of Your Health & Well-Being: Physical, Mental, Emotional, Sexual, and Spiritual. Celebrate your needs – they make you human. Eat a healthful, plant-based diet, exercise and walk daily, meditate, read at least 10 pages a day, journal, make to-do lists, declutter your space, self-pleasure, recite your affirmations, lean into shadow and mirror work, create morning and nighttime routines. Feeling in alignment is essential to allowing your magnetic aura to shine through. Find all my tips to cultivate self-regard in every area of life HERE.

Read, Study, & Build A Strong Skillset: Designing the life of your dreams is an inevitable aspect of living in your queen energy. Stay informed, read books and articles on your industry, interests, current events, cultural happenings, history, and any other topic that brings you joy or you would find intriguing if someone brought up the subject at a dinner party. Mastering an evergreen skillset is essential for succeeding in your career or building a business. Living in your queen energy means living in abundance. While queen energy is a mindset, it is impossible to fully live in this dream reality without having passions and your finances in order. Start with my entire Femme Fatale booklist HERE and guide to building your dream career HERE.

Consistently Invest in Your Appearance: Choose between investing time, money, or extra effort into upkeeping a polished style, beauty, grooming, and physique-maintaining routine. Wear clean, wrinkle-free, well-fitting clothes – styled and accessorized in a way that appears thoughtful & put together with impeccable grooming (clean hair, nails, skin, etc.). Stay consistent with your beauty/makeup/skincare routines, smelling nice daily, and maintain a scheduled routine (weekly, monthly, every 6 weeks, etc.) for specific treatments that make your life easier and make all the difference. These practices don't need to cost a lot of money. You choose to spend more money, time, or effort on these practices, depending on your personal preferences and based on your lifestyle and circumstances.

Remain Dedicated To Lifelong Learning: Make it a priority to read a few articles and 10 pages of a book daily. Ensuring keep up with your learning & education on different topics and the world is fulfilling and enables you to enter into a wider pool of conversations. This practice also strengthens your mind, sharpens focus, and helps your brain relax.

Personalize Your Interactions & Learn Proper Etiquette: Address people by name, and offer a firm handshake. Maintain eye contact. Say "please" and "thank you." RSVP promptly. Communicate clearly and compassionately. Make the person feel special and like the only individual in the room while introducing yourself. It’s the secret to leaving a lasting impression, 

Master The Art of Engaging Conversation: Prioritizing self-presentation, learning how to listen, holding your own, and encouraging others to feel relaxed are the secrets to becoming magnetic in any social situation. Be mindful of how much you listen (more) and speak (less). Carefully consider your tonality and word choice. Remember and recounter the small details of another person’s anecdote that felt important to them. Acknowledge their emotions and validate them. Read more of my tips HERE. 

Become Extremely Discreet Yet Utterly Shameless: Do as you please, but keep your business (or pleasure) to yourself. Privacy is peace, power, bliss, and radiates quiet confidence – the greatest telltale sign that someone is living in her queen energy. Learn to hold your own. You will be guaranteed to earn respect within seconds of gracing anyone's presence.

Embrace Growth Without Succumbing To Your Perfectionist Expectations: Remember that every skill, successful relationship, and goal takes time and experience. No one has it all figured out. It’s okay if you’re not where you expected to be or desire to be at this stage of your life. Stop comparing yourself – we all have our own paths. Choose to do one small thing every day to make your life better – either a step towards reaching a goal or indulging in a deep desire. Ensure there's a healthy (not necessarily equal) balance between the two. Leave your future self better than you found your past self. Express compassion towards yourself and acknowledge that you’re doing your best. Everything starts to make considerably more sense in hindsight. 

Elise Crombez photographed by Javier Vallhonrat for Vogue, June 2008