Be Addicted To Real Dopamine

A few notes on indulging in media consumption

When I pay attention to what media I consume and how those make me feel, I realize some of the things I enjoy actually affect me negatively on the long run.

I enjoy listening to Miss Taylor Swift and get nostalgic about previous loves as much as anyone, but I have to realize I gain literally nothing by doing that - I only get drained.

I quite like some shows (and some high quality ones are worth watching, art puts life into perspective) but binge watching Elite will never be as valuable as sitting down to study Castillian Spanish and I have to act accordingly.

I dislike overly-dramatic tear-jerkers, victimhood-inducing news, and all types of media indirectly promoting pity parties.

Writing this as a reminder for myself, as I quite enjoy such stuff from time to time. One needs to discipline herself in terms of what she puts into her brain.

With love,

Marchesa

Sorry if you have already answered but do you have any ideas about how to develop intuition? Thank you so much

I haven’t!

Meditating every day - this will help you clear your mind of distractions and teach you how to better recognize the emotions you’re feeling, and why you’re feeling them. And overall being very in tune, and aware of who you are. Mindfulness techniques are also really helpful as it helps by being present, and mindful of our surroundings.

Practice using your senses daily - such as your sight, sound, smell, taste and touch. You can do this by spending more time in nature, sitting down somewhere peaceful and just be.

Learn how your intuition speaks to you - your intuition may speak to you in physical/emotional sensations, such as goose bumps, a anxious or uneasy feeling, or even a bad taste in your mouth when you’re being guided towards something that isn’t right. Or can be feelings of excitement, relief or overall peace when you’re being guided down the right path. Also can be communicated through mental pictures, and even your dreams. Also pay close attention to how your energy levels are around certain places, and people.

Be more present - focusing only on the present is the best action you can do for yourself, and your intuition. Focusing too much on things that have happened in the past, brings up unnecessary negative emotions and delays your process on moving forward. Only focus on things that you can control. As this helps you to be in a happy, and positive mindset, which can help you to develop your intuition.

Trust yourself - trusting your intuition is all about trusting yourself, and the more trust you have with yourself, the more successful you’ll be with your intuition.

Learn how to distinguish the difference between your fears and intuition - sometimes we tend to follow with our fears, and this is what holds us back. Think about what it is you’re fearful of, write it down if it helps and how you can make yourself feel more at ease.

Keep a journal - write down any moments you’ve had when your intuition was correct, or not. Keep track of any sensations associated with your intuition. This helps you reflect on what were the signs prior, and how your subconscious communicates.

Ask yourself questions -“How do I feel about this decision?” “How does this person or situation make me feel?” And notice the first answer that comes to your mind.

Build self awareness - self awareness is the power to be aware of your feelings, thoughts, and behaviours, and how they effect you. The more aware we are of how we feel deep inside, the easier it will be to identify our intuition and what it’s trying to tell us.

More career tips please!!

You should always be 10 steps ahead.

Translation: Your boss, team, or senior shouldn't have to remind you to complete tasks; ideally, you should have already completed the task and moved on to the next steps by the time they approach you. Being proactive means constantly seeking ways to enhance processes, workflows, and outcomes. Take the example from a few weeks ago when my boss requested a weekly search of specific KPIs for our client companies. After spending three hours searching and analyzing, and realizing the whole process was inefficient, I collaborated with our data team, organized a meeting, and together, we automated the process. Now, it's a seamless task done with just a click every Friday, much to my boss's delight. Similarly, recognizing the growing importance of AI in finance, I researched upcoming AI conferences, discussed them with my boss, and expanded my knowledge in the field. None of these efforts were particularly challenging or even well thought out--I just thought ahead and as a result, life is a whole lot easier for both me and my team.

Your first job is to make your boss's life easier

By optimizing processes and simplifying tasks, you can significantly enhance your boss's daily efficiency and in turn, make them love and appreciate you endlessly. Take proactive steps like volunteering to take notes during meetings, especially with important clients and while you're at it, follow up promptly by sharing a concise list of key takeaways to help your boss keep them top of mind. Be mindful of their time and present updates clearly and succinctly. Highlight any crucial developments and demonstrate your attentiveness by never making them to repeat instructions. Basically, strive to become indispensable through your proactive approach and valuable contributions.

Confidence is key, but so is humility.

The key is to strike a balance between confidence and humility. Overconfidence can lead to arrogance and closed-mindedness, but on the other hand, excessive humility breeds self-doubt and missed opportunities. So here's how you balance the two. You Listen: confident humility allows you to express your ideas assertively while being open to feedback and suggestions from others. You Empathize: you understand the feelings and perspectives of others, creating a supportive and inclusive environment. You Collaborate: Confident humility encourages teamwork and collaboration, leading to innovative solutions and successful outcomes.

You will be judged based on your appearance.

I don't care what anyone says, humans are visual creatures and we we all absolutely judge books by their covers. So if you dress kinda meh every day in the office, then people will see you as a meh kinda employee. If your clothes are always wrinkled people will think you're a messy worker. And if you look incredibly professional and well put together every single day, people will subconsciously view you as a top-notch worker. Moreover, if your job involves interacting with clients or customers, your appearance can influence their perception of the company as a whole. Dressing professionally and putting together a polished appearance in the office is not just about following a set of rules; it’s about presenting yourself and your organization in the best possible light. Your attire is a reflection of your professionalism, respect for the workplace, and consideration for your colleagues and clients. By investing in your professional image, you invest in your own success and contribute positively to the overall work environment.

Lovingly, Elle

i have such mixed feelings about the idea of “moving in privacy”. i think there are seasons for it (certainly your late 20s/saturn return you will probably desire retreat for a while, or any time you feel uncertain). at the same time, moving in public with a thoughtful personal brand can be an incredible, powerful, and easy way to bring connection and opportunities to you. sometimes i think all this “disappear and move in privacy” talk is just a symptom of poor boundaries and rebranding the fear of being vulnerable… but if you can figure out boundaries and overcome the fear of actually being recognised for your gifts and strengths, well, the world is literally your oyster.

Categories by which you can sort your glow up / self development process:

fashion (wardrobe, jewelry, shoes collection, etc)

body (nutritious diet, skincare, haircare, teeth, fitness, etc)

mental wellbeing (confidence and self-esteem, positivity, focus)

emotional wellbeing (emotional stability, addressing inner wounds, childhood wounds, traumas, anxieties - you have to be in a balanced place in order to really thrive)

education (learning new languages, cultures; courses and certifications; learning about various topics, politics, science, whatever interests you)

grace, poise, posture, manners

financial education - a separate category in and of itself because being financially savvy will change your life (basic financial education, how to invest, healthy money mindset, what are good investments, how mortgages work, etc)

and so many more!

Feel free to add more below or let me know if you’d like more in-depth article on this. 

💋 𝐿𝓊𝓂𝑒𝓃

         morning routine ideas 🥞🫖

how you spend your morning dictates your whole day. create a relaxing structure to truly get yourself ready before heading out into the world ♡

wake up early; before 8am.

don’t go on your phone. right when you wake, bask in the silence and background noise.

meditate by focusing on your breathing.

say affirmations to yourself: “i have woken up in my desired reality. today will be a good day. i am okay. i’m healthy, beautiful, and inspiring. something amazing will happen to me today. i am kind and gentle towards myself.”

stretch!

open up any blinds to let the light in

make your bed. tidy up your space.

say hello and cuddle with your pet(s)

wash your face & brush your teeth

walk your pet(s)

make a simple breakfast and drink water and/or tea and eat it outside or looking out the window.

journal. self reflect, how you feel, what you’d like to accomplish, etc. make it a goal to be more kind to yourself and keep your thoughts in check.

read a few chapters of your current read. 

what are some things you need to get done today? make a plan and set out to get it checked off.

exercise, try a new routine.

choose an outfit, do your hair, try some new looks for the season. have fun. try new things, who knows? maybe you’ll end up loving it.

go on a walk in your neighborhood. 

get in 10,000 steps

buy yourself flowers.

light a candle

put on your favorite feel good songs. let yourself go and freely sing and dance to it.

begin your studies.

rest if needed!

try a new recipe

spend time in nature

youtube wellness channels: a masterlist

workout channels

akshaya agnes - pilates, yoga, strength training

april han - bodyweight strength training

bailey brown - pilates

boho beautiful yoga - yoga

cami sophia - pilates

caroline girvan - weight & strength training

celamarr - weight & strength training

charlie follows - yoga

daisy keech - strength training

dansique fitness - pilates & ballet style workouts

dayana wang - short workouts you can do in bed

dn.beauty natural - short slimming workouts

eleni fit - cardio, pilates, hiit

emi wong - bodyweight strength training

eylem abaci - strength training, pilates

feel good with olya - bodyweight strength training, stretching

fightmaster yoga - yoga

fit by lys - pilates, low impact workouts

fitness__kaykay - weight & strength training, mobility

flow with mira - pilates

gayatri yoga - yoga, pilates, yogalates

gloria song - bodyweight strength training

growingannanas - weight & strength training

growwithjo - walking workouts, strength training, pilates

hailey c. - bodyweight strength training

heather robertson - weight & strength training

hinafit - kpop inspired bodyweight strength training

isawelly - pilates

jessica richburg - yoga

julia.reppel - mobility, strength training

kaila wen - pilates

kpop fitness - kpop inspired strength training and stretches

lena snow - bodyweight strength training

lilly sabri - pilates

madeleine abeid - pilates

madfit - weight & strength training

mady morrison - yoga, stretching

mary braun - bodyweight strength training

mizi - strength training, cardio

move with nicole - pilates

moving mango pilates - pilates

nathalie shanti - pilates, yoga

nobadaddiction - weight & strength training, cardio, hiit

oppserve - bodyweight strength training, stretching

pamela reif - strength training, stretching

pilatesbodyraven - pilates

rachel gulotta fitness - strength training, cardio, fun themed workouts and stretches

rachel’s fit pilates - pilates, strength training, cardio

raminara - pilates

rovena - walking workouts

shirlyn kim - pilates, bodyweight strength training, cardio

sydney cummings houdyshell - weight & strength training

teagan dixon - fun cardio, bodyweight strength training

the glow method - yoga, pilates

the yoga ranger studio - yoga

yoga with adriene - yoga

yoga with bird - yoga

yoga with kassandra - yoga

yoga with kate amber - yoga

yuuka sagawa - bodyweight strength training

somifit - strength training

other channels

diana conforti - fitness, meals, workouts

gainsbybrains - fitness, body recomp/fat loss

janet ndomahina - health, productivity, general wellness

keltie o’connor - fitness, general wellness, nutrition

kyla beland - fitness, health, general wellness

leanbeefpatty - nutrition, talks, motivation

lenalifts - vlogs, fitness, habits

linda sun - nutrition, realistic eating

llexliftz - fitness, healing relationships with food

michael sealey - sleep meditation and hypnosis

mina rome - cooking and recipes

nairee kiana - fitness, health, general wellness

natacha océane - fitness, health, general wellness

rachel wrigley - nutrition, healing relationship with food

samantha clarke - pilates and strength training, vlogs

sanne vloet - pilates, vlogs, nutrition

vicky justiz - bodyweight strength training, fitness tips

My life is dedicated to my family, my self development, and relaxing.

Entering your winter arc (November 1st to December 31)

What is the winter arc?

If you're on social media, especially TikTok, you may have heard content creators mentioning phrases similar to this:

"#enteringmywinterarc: Time to level up before the new year."

"Get ahead of the game—step into your winter arc."

"Transform your life in 30 days by embracing your winter arc."

But what exactly is a "winter arc"?

To me, the winter arc is a period during the colder months—October, November, and December—when we can really focus and get ahead of the game. While others are slowing down and getting comfortable for the holidays, those in their winter arc step up, putting in the work in whatever area they want to improve. By doing this, they’re already making strides toward their goals and establishing habits, so by January 1, when most people are just starting on their resolutions, they’re already well on their way.

Now, I'm not saying that winding down during the winter season is wrong. But if you want a head start, consider stepping into your own winter arc. This way, when the new year arrives, you’re already disciplined in your habits and not starting from scratch, driven only by fleeting motivation.

How to enter your winter arc?

Don’t worry, I wouldn’t just tell you what a winter arc is without giving you concrete steps on how to enter your own (I've got you! 😊).

Step 1: Create a List of Goals for Your Winter Arc

To truly enter your winter arc, you first need to define what you’ll be focusing on. I recommend choosing five goals to work on during this time (having too many can get overwhelming, and we don’t want that).

These goals could be about your health, academics, personal life, or even your spiritual life—literally anything you want to improve. Just make sure your goals are measurable, achievable, and realistic. For example, if your goal is to get 10k steps a day, but you’re currently struggling to reach 5k, that might be too ambitious. Setting unrealistic goals can lead to frustration, and by the end of this season, you may end up without genuine progress because you’ll likely have given up.

Remember, even if your goal is as simple as a 5-minute workout each day, that’s still progress. It’s better to move a little than not at all.

Step 2: Create A Mission Statement

Now that you have your five specific, measurable goals, it’s time to create a mission statement.

In business, a mission statement is a concise declaration that defines an organization’s fundamental purpose, explaining what it does, who it serves, and its core values and objectives.

You might wonder why this matters for your winter arc. Well, understanding the core purpose behind your winter arc is essential. Knowing why you’re doing this, what you hope to achieve, and what drives you is crucial to truly connecting with the five goals you’ve set. I recommend answering these seven questions in-depth, then using ChatGPT to condense your answers into a concise mission statement:

What is your primary purpose for this winter? (e.g., to learn, to grow, to reflect)

How do you want your actions this winter to impact yourself or others?

What specific areas of your life do you want to concentrate on? (e.g., health, career, relationships)

What mindset do you want to cultivate during this season? (e.g., positivity, resilience, openness)

What inspires or motivates you? (e.g., experiences, quotes, people)

What personal values do you want to embody during this winter? (e.g., integrity, growth, compassion)

By the end of this winter, what do you hope to have achieved or learned about yourself?

Having a mission statement is a powerful way to stay motivated and disciplined during your winter arc, especially on challenging days. A simple, one-sentence mission statement that you can easily look at to remind yourself why you started is elite (even better if you set it as your phone lock screen).

Step 3: Develop An Action Plan

Now that you’ve got your goals and mission statement, it’s time to build a solid action plan to keep yourself on track.

An action plan breaks down each goal into manageable steps, helping you clearly see the path from where you are now to where you want to be. Start by listing out specific actions or habits that align with each of your five goals. For example, if one of your goals is to improve your health, your action steps might include planning daily workouts, setting a hydration goal, or meal-prepping on Sundays.

Prioritize Your Tasks: Decide which actions are most important and schedule them first. This will help you stay focused on your highest-impact goals.

Set a Routine: Consistency is key for progress, so set up a routine that allows you to work on your winter arc daily or weekly.

Track Your Progress: Keep a journal, use an app, or create a simple checklist to track your progress. Seeing what you’ve accomplished can be incredibly motivating.

Plan for Challenges: Think about any obstacles that could arise (like busy days or lack of motivation) and have a backup plan ready. For example, if you miss a workout, can you fit in a quick 10-minute routine at home?

With an action plan you will have some structure to your winter arc, helping you to stay committed and organized as you work toward each goal. By the time the new year comes around, you’ll already be deep into your goals, with the discipline and results to prove it.

I really hope that this helped y'all and inspired you to enter you winter arc. Please feel free to ask me any questions that you might have.

Inspired by LenaLifts youtube video <3

P.S. Even if you’re reading this after November 1st, you can still start your winter arc. It’s not about when you start; but starting in general.

how to focus on yourself

limit your social media usage or delete entirely

if you use social media for work, school, or self-development, this might not work for you but if you use social media for friend updates, stalking your ex, obsessing over other people, etc., then take some time off social media; whether you want to limit yourself to 30 minutes a day for a month or deactivate entirely for a month (or however long you want). sometimes you just need to fall off the face of the earth and not allow for distractions to take your attention off of you.

work inwards and see what needs fixing within you

do you self-sabotage, have a lack of self-control, have a bad temper, or have any other traits that hinder your process of growth and development? spend some time with yourself and get deep. it takes a lot of honesty and self-awareness to even do this step so you might spend weeks trying to figure out your weaknesses. once you figure them out, you research and practice day in and day out the steps to fight/heal what you need to work on.

create a list of standards

have a list of standards for every area + person in your life. what are your must-haves and what are your like-to-haves? when you have a set of standards for everything in your life, you will make time for things that meet your standards and you will not make time for the things that don’t. i’ll be uploading a standards template today that you can print out or follow if you want to be organized and specific.

create daily, weekly, and monthly (short-term) goals and make working on those goals a priority

if you’re working on your goals everyday, you are undoubtedly working on yourself and focusing on yourself. i suggest having no more than 3-5 goals you’re working on at a given time to avoid burnout, but you do what’s best for you. when i fully focus on myself, i literally don’t have the time to do anything else.

get in the mindset of “i deserve” rather than “i want”

when you say you want something, it’s putting you in the mindset of “wishful thinking”. if you say “i deserve” instead, you will operate from a mindset of standards like i talked about earlier and expectation. in return, you will be more motivated to work on what you deserve, rather than wish for what you want.