Life Is So Much More Enjoyable Once You Stop Putting So Much Pressure On Yourself

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Just as a side note to the Runaway sskk au: Kyouka is saved from the mafia by Akutagawa.

Atsushi was never the level that og!Akutagawa was as a mentor, but Kyouka was scared as fuck of him because he never took human form near her and was always watching from afar, so she frequently felt like walking on eggshells and like he would kill her if she made the slightest slip during any of her missions.

In reality Atsushi was just trying to look out for her in a way a tiger will usually deal with a cub close to the age of beggining to hunt, tottally unaware of how scary he was for her until she was hiding behind Akutagawa when he came to retrieve Kyouka from the ada and realized she thought of him as a threat.

Bridges Burned (Part I)

First part of the Atsushi-centric prequel to Build Upon The Ruins. For @zigur.

Rating: T Words: 5,600 Warnings: past child abuse.

Bridges Burned Part I

One of the Headmaster’s favorite things to say about Atsushi was that he destroyed everything he touched.

It wasn’t one of his lessons, exactly; he never applied it to Atsushi’s mind with more than brief, dismissive words, never carved it into Atsushi’s back with belt or stick. "You destroy everything, boy,“ he would simply say. And he would look at him with profound disgust and leave.

So Atsushi figured that this was one rule he could circumvent with time. He broke breakable things, yes, because his hands shook often; he stepped over fragilities, indeed, in his attempts to cower and flee; but these were not things he attributed to himself as much as to the Headmaster, who was the source of the flight and who was the source of the shakes.

Atsushi thought: Once I am out of here, I won’t shake anymore.

Keep reading

Do you think Atsushi has trouble eating peanut butter, you know like how a cat's tongue can't grip Peanut butter?

I SAY YES!!

I think Atsushi does a lot of tiger/cat things!

Actually my most favorite headcanon for him, was put forth by @awkward-atsushi who pointed out that tigers don’t meow, they chuff.

So now Atsushi chuffs like a tiger in my mind.

-MI

Have you ever seen one of those videos of Tigers or other big cats playing with a pumpkin that's been filled with meat?

Here's a cute one if you've never seen that before. https://youtu.be/fFOPhelZxPU?si=5jR3eDQg5BU4QBjC

Anyway can you imagine as Atsushi Starts to feel more comfortable and safe around the agency He starts displaying more big cat mannerisms. Because he knows the others won't judge him for it or think he's less human.

Imagine getting him to feel comfortable and safe enough that he starts playing. I think that would be fun.

a/n: THAT’S ADORABLE OMG honestly atsushi deserves to play around every once in a while outside his agency duties given his traumatic childhood :(( i think it’d b so nice seeing him relax a bit and just be the kid he never got to be. here’s some headcanons i think might fit into ur idea !!

atsushi hcs: big cat behavior!

✑ character/s: atsushi nakajima, mentions of other ada members

✑ short desc: just atsushi being the big cat he is.

✑ content includes: general headcanons ; focus is on atsushi ; no warnings, just pure fluff

✑ word count: 1.3k words

i think as much as atsushi may have been portrayed as being on the more timid / wary side in the beginning of the series when he first joined the agency, he was also almost always on high alert / defensive mode a lot — typical cat behavior

after the whole shenanigan with the black lizard breaking into the agency’s main office (and them being thrown out promptly after lol), that’s when his trust in them solidified a little more and he decided then and there that they were the people he could always come back to no matter what

hear me out for this one: although the popular choice for the person able to loosen up his screws a bit more is dazai, i genuinely think that both the tanizaki siblings are one of the most responsible for helping him relax a little around the agency

when both jun’ichiro and naomi aren’t being weird (ahem) or when they aren’t on the job, i’m pretty sure they act the same way all typical teenagers do — they have interests outside of work / school that they spend time with, like to go along with trends, and they socialize a lot with people their age

and because the tanizaki siblings are the closest age-wise to atsushi, i think he learns to act his age around them as well. they probably hang out every once in a while and do normal stuff that don’t involve the use of abilities or crime-solving

hanging out with dazai is a little more different; i don’t want to make their relationship seem shallow because i know there’s more to them than meets the eye, although branching out in this post might make me go off topic, so we’ll just stick to saying that beyond them having a mentor / supervisor and student relationship, dazai seems to be able to bring out a much more honest and open side to atsushi

dazai’s words of encouragement and points of advice allow him to grow from being stuck in a circle of self-pity and learn to slowly move on from the events that traumatized him as a child — that being said, atsushi learns to unfold himself a little more with dazai’s guidance, which in turn helps him become a more honest version of himself around others

outside agency duties, i hc dazai to be the more chaotic of the two, often dragging atsushi into whatever shenanigans he has planned. he probably lures atsushi into playing pranks on kunikida, who very likely finds them irritating at first (schedule issues) but i think kunikida has the heart to let them off easy every now and then given he’s well-aware that they never had the easiest upbringings either. and if he scolds dazai / atsushi, it’s really just because he cares about them

with ranpo, i think atsushi is probably the more mature of the two. i hc that whenever they get paired together for a mission and are sent out of yokohama for that same reason, they often stop by candy stores to bond over buying sweet treats after accomplishing their tasks

yosano comes off as quite strong to atsushi at first, and the whole operation thing probably still scares him to death, but her kindness and care towards everyone including atsushi helps put him at ease. he’s at comfort knowing that someone is there to patch him up as well as the other people he cares about at the end of the day, even if his ability allows him to regenerate his limbs

he learns to become an older sibling figure through both kyouka and kenji. there’s more responsibility taken for them outside their jobs (older brother duties), but the innocence that comes with playing games with them or simply chatting about whatever topic pops up helps him hold onto his own innocence

and then there is fukuzawa — stern as he may appear, i’m sure he genuinely cares for the well-beings of all his employees. his ability says it all: it gives his subordinates all the control and freedom needed to ensure that their abilities are under full command of themselves. from atsushi’s side, there is gratefulness (especially after making peace with his own ability), but from fukuzawa, there is a lot of parental care outside duty (also because atsushi is part cat and fukuzawa likes cats lmao)

that comfort from having peers he can socialize with without the fear of being bullied or messed around with allows him to feel a little more at peace with himself at some point later on, and because he is part-tiger, he eventually ends up becoming more playful around everyone when his feline instincts come out

i like to imagine everyone sees it as a little inside office joke at first when they buy him toys like those cat scratching pillars or the little fishing rods with the feathers at the end, and he gets embarrassed about it initially, but he’s around people who care about him and don’t judge him for what he is, and he figures hey, why the hell not?

so now, it becomes the norm for one person every day to bring a new cat toy for atsushi to play with

it’s kenji who brings the pumpkins to the office (which earns him a few side-eyes of confusion, not to his knowledge), and at first, atsushi doesn’t really know what to do with them until one day after a particularly stressful mission, he finds himself gnawing at the pumpkin to help relieve himself a bit

it’s a strange feeling at first, but being able to sink his teeth into something that (thankfully) isn’t human flesh really helps him relax

sometimes he’ll use his tiger claws to slash at the pumpkins and mess around with the insides if he doesn’t feel like using his teeth

nobody at the agency really says anything about it aside from the occasional joke about it here and there but it’s all light-hearted and they seem to really enjoy watching him be himself around them

there is now a supply of pumpkins specifically for atsushi, and the roof garden above the agency now also has a pumpkin patch (run by kenji and kyouka, of course, and supervised by fukuzawa every now and then) so they don’t run out

remains of the pumpkins aren’t wasted. somehow the rest of the agency members (or at least the ones who know how to cook) find different pumpkin recipes to try and now they have a mini cookbook in the communal kitchen where the main ingredient for every dish is a pumpkin lmao

i’d imagine that if they do celebrate halloween, atsushi’s in charge of gnawing out the insides so the rest of the members (and he himself) can carve their decorations on the pumpkins respectively

when atsushi is sleepy, he’ll rub his face around on the surface he’s laying on or the person nearest to him (kind of like cats in general) and i think that a lot of the other members find it adorable so nobody makes any comments about it when he does that

sometimes dazai will bring one of those laser pens around when he’s bored and when he points it at a wall (or kunikida’s forehead), atsushi instinctively goes up to try and “catch” it lmao

i think he really enjoys playing hide-and-seek with the kids (and ranpo) especially when he’s “it”, primarily because of the feeling of the chase / hunt (which big cats seem to enjoy)

to no one’s surprise, fukuzawa enjoys playing with him a lot when he’s in his big cat form. i feel like he spares a few of the sardines he keeps in his yukata for atsushi as well. he probably carries around one of those fishing rods with a toy fish / feather at the end for atsushi (and atsushi enjoys it anyway lol)

everyone thinks it’s very enjoyable seeing him be himself. even if the whole found family dynamic turns out to not be true in canon, his happiness will still remain their happiness because they’re all still part of an organization who supports each other and are understanding of one another’s upbringings

atsushi with big cat behavior is so cute :>

a/n: i think i enjoyed myself a little too much with these and got carried away LMAO feel free to let me know how i did!

Little tiger 😢😢 eu.. Euuu.. 😭😭😢😢😢 m my baby tiger that I hate

so much atsushi slander. how do i put into words that his character is so refreshing. that his reactions aren't weak for the situations he was put into and what prep he was given, but endearing to me because he's always trying his best. not in a 'he just messed up and is trying his best sort of way' but in a 'he's experienced so much cruelty that still affects him to this day, but he's still trying his best.' that he hates himself sometimes and can't brute force a solution to the problems he faces. he's just. so realistic.

Headcanon that the reason why Atsushi’s eyes are purple and yellow is because the yellow part of his eyes is his ability. He was born with bad eyesight and couldn’t see shit so the tiger manifested itself in Atsushi’s eyes to fix his eyesight but now he’s also colorblind.

And then for Atsushi’s first month and a half of working at the agency every time Dazai makes direct skin to skin contact with Atsushi his vision gets 10x worse. And Atsushi’s too scared to point it out at first but eventually he’s like “hey guys every time Dazai touches me I can’t see and also I start seeing new colors what’s wrong with me”

Eventually they all figure it out and get Atsushi a pair of glasses so that he can turn off his ability every once and awhile, Atsushi also ends up learning how to drive because Kunikida and Yosano can’t just be the agency’s chauffeurs and even though he can only drive if he turns off his ability and puts on his glasses it’s still really funny to say that a colorblind teenager can drive better than 90 percent of the agency.