(Bucky And Y/N Yelling At Each Other)

Feelings

What happens once you kill yourself? Because I'm ready to go.

You wanna know what happens once you kill yourself? Your mother comes home from work and finds her baby dead and she screams and runs over to you and tries to get you to wake up but you won’t and she keeps screaming and shaking you and her tears are dripping onto your face and your dad hears all the screaming and runs into the room and he can’t even speak because the child that he loved and the child that he watched grow up is gone forever and finally your little sister runs into the room to see what all the fuss is about and she sees you dead. The person she looked up to and loved. The person she bragged about to  her friends, the person she wanted to be just like when she grew up, the person that made her feel safe. But she’s never really going to get to grow up and smile and laugh and love because she’ll always be consumed with this feeling of missing you. And now there’s something missing from your family and they can barely look at each other anymore because everything reminds them of you but you’re gone and hurts more than anything. and you think that your mom never cared because she was always busy and yelling at you to finish your homework and clean your room and forgot to say I love you sometimes but really, she loved you more than anything and she doesn’t leave the house anymore, she can’t even get out of bed and she’s getting thinner and thinner because it’s too hard to eat. Your father had to quit his job and he doesn’t sleep anymore, every time he closes his eyes he sees his baby dead, and the image never goes away no matter how much alcohol he drinks. And at school your best friend sees that your seat is empty and she gets this sick feeling in her stomach and that’s when she hears the announcement. You killed yourself. And suddenly she’s screaming and crying in the middle of class and no one even bothers comforting because they’re all  busy sitting there staring at your empty seat with tears dripping down their cheeks and all she wants is for you to hug her and tell her it’s gonna be okay like you always did, but this time, you’re not there to do it, everything is dark now that you’re gone and her grades are slipping, she barely goes to school anymore and she ended up in hospital after taking too many pills because she wanted to see you again. the girls who used to make fun of the way you dressed feel their throats get tight, they don’t talk to each other anymore, they don’t talk to anyone, they’re all in therapy trying so hard not to blame themselves but nothing works. and your teacher who always gave you a hard time stares blankly at the wall, she quits her job a few days later. And then your boyfriend hears the news and he can’t breathe, he still calls you a lot just to hear your voice and he talks to you on facebook but you never message him back, he can’t fall in love again because every girl he meets reminds him of you, he’s never going to get over you, he loved you and he cries himself to sleep every night, hating himself and slicing his skin because he couldn’t save you and he’s never going to hold you in his arms or hear you laugh again. Now everyone who knew you, whether they were a big part of your life or someone you passed in the hallway a few times a week, they carry this aching feeling around inside them because you’re gone, and they miss you, and they don’t know why you left but it must’ve been their fault and they should’ve stopped you and they should’ve told you they loved you more and that feeling is never going to go away. And so you killed yourself

but you killed everyone else around you too. 

tumblr i am BEGGING you to let me reblog ads, this is the funniest thing i’ve ever seen

“Incredible. You follow one idiot question with another.”

— Tony, definitely

Lies

He was suppose to be dead…so how is Simon fucking Riley standing in front of you?

A/N: Guys these tik toks make my mind RUN! So her is another idea from this tik tok! Lost of heartache and angst so enjoy! 💙

“A broken heart is all that’s left.”

Warnings: ANGST, heartache, trauma, depression, mention of suicide, violance, swearing

simon x reader list

Months. Months you sat crying in the shower. Screaming into your pillow. Hell you fucking slapped Soap because of this. Because Simon Riley died. Died when he promised to come home, you didn’t eat or sleep right. Price would eventually pull you aside to take a holiday. Clear your mind.

You did and all you did was drink and smoked the left over cigarettes of his. To eventually go shop for more and pretend he was smoking them. You drank all his whiskey and your wine. Your parents came over to make sure you weren’t dead, that you decided to pull a Romeo and Juliet bullshit. You wouldn’t do that, you wouldn’t have taken your life.

Instead you drank until you didn’t feel the numbness. The sadness. The memories of both you and Simon. Simon plagued your mind, wanting his laugh to burst in the air. His voice. His hands. His kiss. Anything. So why not drink until you don’t remember the next day. You did this until going back into work.

Gaz would make sure you would be alright. Soap tried to make you laugh. Price made sure you wouldn’t run into the field killing yourself. Yet this was so much worse.

Price sat all of the task force down for a debriefing. Yet when the door opened it was him. Simon. Simon fucking Riley. Everyone froze, not because of him being alive, because they knew. They knew he would be alive. Nothing was said for a moment as you stared at him, waiting for him to say or move anything.

“Y/n,” Soap said closing the door behind him. You haven’t turned to him yet looking over the paperwork you had. “Do ya have a minute?”

You rolled your eyes, smirking. “John I am not doing your paperwork. Ghost already mentioned…”

“It’s not that Lass,” Soap mumbled playing with his hands. Soap argued that it would be not a smart idea. However, with the rat in the ranks it would convince that he was dead. “It’s Simon.”

You perked from that, you gave him a confused look. “What about him?” You knew after that, after Soap used Ghost’s name. The one you would say when you laughed, cried, moaned.

“They…they tried to get him out but…” The world flipped, you yelled at Soap and pushed him. Telling him to shut up but you also didn’t know that Simon was listening in. He didn’t want this. He didn’t want you to be the one not to know. Price convinced him due to the rat falling for the trap.

Simon heard you yell until the deafening slap echoed through the halls. You slapped him hard, you gritted through your teeth that he was a liar. You said that if his body is not here then it isn’t true. However, he knew that they convinced you that he was too burned to actually see him. His true form. Not a burnt crisp. They led you to the body, left small hints that it would have been his body.

He thought about you crying above the body. Screamed until you couldn’t. Held the bastards hand. Everything was suppose to not to happen. It shouldn’t have been months. He hoped that it wouldn’t. Price would give him updates on how you were doing. It didn’t sound good. He wished he could leave and get to you, hold you, and apologize for everything but he couldn’t.

Now he stands right here in front of you. Hate. Hate is the word the best describe your eyes. “Did you all know?” You voice said in the room. The quiet room. It was filled with venom. It was quiet.

No one said anything until you stood up and slammed your hand on the table. “Who fucking knew!” You snapped your head to Price.

“It was to pull Samson out.” Price said watching your move.

“Bring Samson out,” You repeated shaking your head, looking over at Simon. “You fucking bastard. You fucking bastard.”

No one expected the next thing, you walked over to him and pushed him hard. Slamming your fist into his chest. “You know how long I fucking grieved! How long my heart has been in pieces! You fucking just let this happen! Let me be in pain!”

Simon let you slam your fists into his chest. He deserved it. “You fucking promised! You promised! And it’s broken! It’s been fucking broken!”

Price told everyone to leave besides Simon, you, and Price. As everyone huddled out Simon grabbed your shoulders. “I had no choice.”

“Everyone has a choice!” You said pushing him one last time before facing away.

Price shook his head. “He didn’t, I wanted to tell ya but we couldn’t. We had to make it believable to bring him out.”

You shook your head. “I don’t care, you know what I’ve done the last couple of months? Did you know that empty feeling? Or the nights where I thought ending it all would have me not suffer?”

“Dove,” Simon mumbled reaching out to you. “It’s fucked up and I am sorry it happened. But I’m here now.”

You wanted to lean into him and let him hold you. There was just so much anger. Resentment. You just couldn’t believe that he would do that to you. You made the choices to drink and make yourself miserable sure but the feeling you had. The darkness that pulled you away from anything and anyone.

His hand burned your arm as he gently grabbed it. You ripped your arm away. “Fuck both of you,” Price face dropped to give more reassurance. “We are suppose to be a team.”

Simon knew that was a jab more for him. You both have been secretly running together until he had to fake his death. It was easy when he first did it, making sure that everyone knew he was dead so he could kill all the men that killed his family. Once Price came up to him and asked he declined it.

“No.” Simon firmly said and reaching for the door of Price’s office.

“Simon this would be the best route for the team,” Price explained standing up. “Why the hesitation?” Price knew. Simon knew that Price knew. He just wanted Simon to state it. Confirm Price’s suspicions. “It’s her isn’t it?”

Simon held the knob of the door tighter. All he did was nod his head. He couldn’t lie to Price even if he wanted to. “A year,” Price nodded, he didn’t know it was that long. “I can’t do it to her.”

Price sighed and walked over to place a hand on his shoulder. “I don’t either but…we have to. It will unfortunately be the best time and convincing.”

It felt like a poison came out of Price’s mouth. He didn’t want to do it to his team, didn’t want to hurt nobody. Why everyone got to know? Do they could take care of you. Simon didn’t want that. It wasn’t fair ok your part. He promised to protect you no matter the cost. “Johnny tells her.” He spoke softly.

Price nodded in agreement. “I already assumed that.”

Couple of weeks later was when he wasn’t suppose to be there. Wasn’t suppose to hear your scream. The wail. The heart break. He had to contain himself not to run in there to hold you. Tell you it was some sick joke. “Simon.” Price warned.

Simon stared at him for a moment. His own heart shattering, before Simon could say anything the rat came running in. Anger boiled through his body as he watched him run in the shadows. Why does he get to comfort you? While he stood and watched the heart break unfold. He had to peel himself out of the building, Price sneaking him out and leave. Never had he cried before but after being dropped off at the solitary home, he cried for hours. Wishing that he could have done something better.

“Y/n.” Simon whispered. His heart shattering. Not looking at you. Not hearing you. Nothing was coming around.

It felt like hours of you not talking. Price didn’t want to say anything neither did Simon. They wanted you to speak. Thoughts ran wild in your mind. How could they? Why would they? You knew why it was beneficial for the mission. But was it for you? Was all the heartache and not working especially worth it? You can’t do this over and over again. The pain was too hard. You closed your eyes and shook your head.

You’re tired. You are mentally. Emotionally. Physically tired. You can’t deal with this again if it happens. Your heart is still broke and broke even more of that could be possible. You could feel the water more and more drowning you, you’ve been trying to come back for air. But now this? It went back to what it was.

“I’m done.” You said ripping your patch off and placing it on the table.

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Reblog if Black Lives Matter to you

Where are those woke white people at!?

Bruce: *on the phone with Natasha* You’re on speaker, behave.

Natasha: Or what, you’ll spank me?

Bruce:…

Tony:…

Steve:…

Clint:…

Thor:…

Nikki Giovanni

Blurbs

Fantasy/Supernatural Blurbs

You’re a mermaid?

Shawn is an angel…literally?

Want // Werewolf Shawn*

Petting | Werewolf Shawn

Late Night | Werewolf Shawn

Challenge | Werewolf Shawn

Mine | Werewolf Shawn/Hybrid Wolf Reader

General AU

MMA Trainer Shawn

Bunks Bestfriend!Shawn

Just As Sweet // coffee shop AU

Missed You // College!Shawn

You and Shawn have a baby

Hot Cop!Shawn

Hockey!Shawn (badboy)

Little Bee

If I Had You | BFF!Shawn

Want | Friend AU

Feels Like Love | Badboy/BFF AU

Non AU (Real Life Shawn)

Cuddling

Shawn wants you to move in with him

Cake

Shawn locks himself out late at night

Protective Shawn

Lazy Day

The one where Shawn /really/ likes your new heels

Drunk kissin’

Under the table

Sweet Tooth

My Everything

Will you…

Down (plus size reader x shawn)

Shawn’s Favorite Thing

Hallo-weenie (you and Shawn go to a haunted house)

Nightmares

Sleepy

Aquarium Date

Bath

Backstage

Sick

You’ve Ruined Me

I Never Stopped Loving You (Jealous Shawn)

Perspective

Grounding 

Soft Love // plus size/curvy reader

Sick And Tired // Tour Shawn

“One Liner Blurbs”

“She’s hiding behind the couch.”

“Look at my tan. Shawn your skin is red, that’s a burn.”

You had one job…

“I thought I lost you”

“You want me to do WHAT?”

“dude, you’re whipped”

“Do I have to?”

“ARE YOU SERIOUS!?”

“I’ll put that tongue to good use if you don’t stop sticking it out”

“I’m telling you I’m haunted”

“Run for it!”

“I need a place to stay”

“You work for me.”

One Call Away