Someone Said That Being Depressed Is Your Avatar Telling You That It Is Tired Of The Character That You

It's my 2 year anniversary on Tumblr 🥳

Ruts. Also known as one of those phases in life where you are just existing and not really living. Where you are just going through the exact same cycle day by day just to keep yourself alive. 😕

Where you have no idea what's next or don't know what you are working towards. The phase where it gets to the point where it feels like you're just being dragged by life.🫥😵😵‍💫

That's when you know you need some clarity. 💯

And sometimes clarity requires stillness. So slow down if you will.

Other times clarity requires silence and solitude. Take time away from external stimuli because you can't hear yourself if you always surrounded by outside noise. 📢📢

And as you start to slow down and be still eventually the answers will come.

Maybe in the form of a burst of inspiration. Or coming across that one thing you used to enjoy but left halfway cause you never had the time for it. Or maybe through meeting rekindling an old friendship. 🫂🫶🏼

Anyway.... you never really know what that one choice can bring you as long as it's bringing you closer to your true self.🌸💫

I truly believe that humans are born with confidence and then we lose it somewhere along the way. Through judgements, comparisons, being laughed at, etc. If we look at babies for example, I mean it sure takes a certain amount of confidence and courage to learn to walk among everyone else who can walk. Yet falling doesn't really bother them. They get up and try again and again.👶🏻🙈💫

And so one thing I have learnt when it comes to having confidence in oneself is through self-trust. But how can you trust yourself when you're constantly doubting yourself? 🤯😤🥺

And one way to build self-trust is by keeping the promises you made to yourself. If you told yourself you'll do something then go do it. And by compounding those kept promises, you become confident in yourself cause you know- you'll always show up no matter what. It may be messy, overwhelming, scary but you showed up for yourself. You trusted yourself enough to do something. And that's confidence.✨😃

The best thing that works for me when feeling anxious and airy is first grounding myself.

This could be taking a walk barefoot on the Earth, jumping up and down(if I have the energy).

Sometimes it's just sitting outside being present with whatever is outside. That looks like listening to the birds, sitting on the grass, cloud gazing, bird watching or people watching.

Doing something that simple just makes me feel at home within myself.

After I have done that and I feel grounded that's when I start questioning my thoughts as to whether they are true or not and whether it is within my control or not. And lastly I choose to let go and melt into the present moment. Because in that moment I am choosing to trust God in that moment and in turn it's easier to then trust myself. It's easier said than done but it helps ✅

One thing I've been insecure about for most of my life is my tummy. My fat tummy. Cause that's what it is - fat.

Most of the time, I suck it in to the point where people even compliment me on my "flat" stomach and in my head I'll be like "if only you knew"

Anyway, today I took a visit to the doctor and I was seated in the reception area, across from me sat a girl around me age wearing a crop top. That crop top was revealing her stomach. Her fat stomach but she wasn't even bothered at all. For her, it was completely normal.

And because of that experience I've began to fully accept this part of me. The stomach I don't see as nice. I've decided to accept my stomach for what it is.

I've decided to appreciate my stomach for all the digesting and detoxing that it has done for me.

I'm slowly learning to love my stomach by looking in the mirror and hugging it and also speaking positive affirmations and being grateful that I am healthy because of it.

I was watching this video of this beautiful woman who was explaining how our desires aren't what we actually want but it's the feelings of having that desire that we want.

And I brought this to my current situation. I have been obsessing over getting a high paying job lately, like I can't afford to wait. I want that job right now.

And after listening to this video, I started asking myself why I want this job so badly. The first answer being to have a sense of security and stability. But it is not only that.

I want that job quickly so that I can get some validation from my family members - so that I can get approved of, in a way. So that I can be that cousin that helps others out. So that I don't have to constantly ask my parents or siblings for money. So that my brother does not constantly tell me how I wasted my years to a degree and have nothing to show for it.

So I realised that deep down, I want validation, acceptance and approval. And now the question is how can I give that to myself rather than wait for others to give it to me.

What does the process to an outcome normally look like? If I look back on my past experienc

es, on things that I managed to achieve, there was an element of curiosity and fun to it.

Until the novelty wore off and things go hard. And during those moments that's when you ask yourself why you started to begin with? What would happen if you don't give up? And what kind of character are you choosing to portray in this part of your story?📖📖

Like if you look at your favourite show, the ending wouldn't be that satisfying without the ups and downs that the characters face. And sometimes the show is so good you don't want it to end.

Of course, there are times when you decide to take a break to rest and re-centre yourself. And there are times when you choose to give it all up because it's no longer aligned with the goal you had in mind. But it's all about taking note of your patterns when you are in that "hard/difficult" phase.

Do you start procrastinating. Do you move on to a new project or do you choose to forget about the task all together?

Normally this is where your character is being tested.

So if you need to go on your knees and ask God for strength, do so. If you need to cry it out and call friend do so. If you need to watch a motivational video - do what you need to in order to move forward and keep the momentum.

Because it's in that phase that growth happens because now you are surpassing your limits. You are getting that character development which takes you to the next level.❇️💯

So fall in love with that process because that's the most beautiful and impactful part of the journey. Make sure you're having fun even in the midst of difficulties cause at some point,it's gonna have to end and the ending has to be just as beautiful. It's the messy middle that we need to learn how to master so that we reach the beautiful ending. 🪷🪷

Ever found yourself in a situation where there is absolutely nothing you can do to change a situation. Like you have exhausted all the possibilities you can think of and still come to nothing and all you can do is overthink.

Overthinking about how the situation will pan out. How that situation will leave you stranded. How you are so uncertain that your mind is all over the place.

And when you are in that situation, you can't do anything, let alone think properly.

In my experience, what I've come to find out is that the best think you can do is acknowledge where you are. Acknowledge that you don't know what to do. Acknowledge that there is nothing you can do, like you have no control over the situation and make peace with that.

Sometimes we overthinking because of the uncertain future ahead of us. Overthinking helps us stay in control even if we aren't really in control.

Don't focus too much on what might or might not happen. Bring yourself back to the present moment and away from your mind. You can only focus on this current moment as that is all you're in control of. Once you're here - trust that it will all work out and everything is going to be okay. It's just a hurdle - and you've been through a lot of hurdles in your life even though they were difficult, so what's one more, right?

No amount of thinking can change the outcome of a situation. So save that energy for something peaceful, that fear and anxiety is not worth it. You are going to be okay.❤️🎀

Isn't it weird how at times we always wishing things were different. Like having a different job, being in a relationship with someone or living somewhere different. Ye when we look back there was once a time when we prayed to have what we have today. 🤲

At times we always wishing how nice it would be to have what that other person has. Not that it's a bad thing. But we never take the time to think what took them to get there or have that. We never take the time to think about about the pain or struggle that the other person had to endure to reach that outcome. What hard times they faced to finally get to the top of that mountain.🗻⛰️

So if you're going through a rough terrain right now, embrace that struggle because there's a lesson there. And eventually we'll reach the outcome we want.💯🤍