(Almost) Exactly My Sentiment! Thank You So Much For Expressing It Better Than I Ever Could Hope To Do

A revelation of a design for me!

Could do without a posy at the belt, though.

1920 c. Cotton day dress with blue stitched design. From Rococo Vintage, Etsy.

thinking about time lords and their fucked up little society again and i just realized how devastating the revelation of the drums in the end of time is in relation to the master's character.

because of all the renegade time lords in the universe, i think it's the master who most exemplifies the philosophical outlook that the time lords have towards the rest of the universe. they're stuffy observers, administrators, yes - but this position is one they've decided for themselves because of this concept of supremacy over other life forms. imposed and upheld this idea that other species that lack a time sense are less-than, primitive. and the master buys into this hard.

and i mean... compared to the doctor, the master is good at being a time lord. he buys into these supremacist concepts, this idea that every other species (and especially humans) is practically a meaningless ant in the grand scheme of the universe. takes it to the extreme, yes, but its the same underlying principle. he's a good student (despite whatever chibnall might think) - that one time lord from terror of the autons (identity forever a mystery) (its brax) even says "he did receive a higher degree of cosmic science than you." the master could play their game if he wanted to. he's remarkably comfortable with being on gallifrey/the idea of gallifrey(in eot/tlotl) than the doctor ever is. where the doctor avoids the subject of the lord presidency like the plague, the master is like "well if you kill the president you ARE the president! and then you have all of gallifrey!" and when the doctor destroys gallifrey (nominally), the master tries to rebuild it in the sound of drums/last of the time lords. tries to emulate their society. honor them in his little fucked up way. he brings them back from the time war!

and what does he get for it? how did the time lords treat him in response?

they decide to implant the sound of drums in his head, stretching back until he's a child. puts this insufferable noise, this splitting headache, in his head for his entire life. all so that they may live while he dies. because he is diseased, because of them. he has swallowed the pill, bought their propaganda, he has followed the rules, he tried to rebuild them he tried. and in response he is chewed up and spit out like trash so that rassilon's god complex can survive while the universe crumbles.

how crushing must that be to someone? to have your whole worldview - that you are better, you are chosen, you are special - come crumbling down in a few short moments? to see the revered founder-god of the civilization you have so desperately tried to revive look at you and say "you are diseased," even though he was the one to poison you in the first place?

and as his heart is torn to pieces... when rassilon says "no more," and charges his gauntlet, the master - who has spent countless lives fighting death with his bare hands - does not move.

part of me thinks he does not want to.

am i the only one who doesn't want to know crowley's angel name

my beautiful baby girl [INFORMATION REDACTED]

I think what I love most about Crowley’s character is how poetic and cyclical his story and struggle is.

It starts with him in heaven, an angel with a deep love and reverence for God and her creations, a love that he then pours into his work to bring Her vision of the stars to life. But just as he begun his work, he is given a message from God through Aziraphale that can be effectively summed up to “nothing lasts forever”. The physical manifestations of Crowley’s passion and love will be erased in, what is to an angel, a blink of the eye. For forever God has always been the designer and Crowley, as an angel, has always been there to simply carry out Her plans. But it is here that Crowley begins to question and strain this unspoken relationship, desiring change.

So despite being warned, Crowley dares to test his relationship with God and questions the unspoken, only to be rejected and abandoned by her in the most visceral way imaginable. It was here that Crowley began his fall.

As a demon, Crowley comes to love Aziraphale and, just as he did with God, he expresses this intense love through acts of service. He takes him out to eat, he saves him, he bends at every whim to keep him happy and safe, and yet nothing is ever explicitly said. Instead they dance around each other and communicate in code, and so Crowley is left to assume.

But then just as with God, Crowley pushes his luck and says too much, asks for too much. He questions the comfortable unspoken dance they’ve been doing for centuries and asks for something more. In response, Aziraphale parrots what he had said in the very beginning, except this time it’s his own words: “nothing lasts forever”. Not the stars, not the bookshop, not love.

So despite being warned, Crowley kisses Aziraphale, posing his most desperate question. In return, he is rejected and abandoned by Aziraphale in the most visceral way imaginable.

Aziraphale’s “I forgive you” is a very loaded response, and while it rings as an attempt to call back to his and Crowley’s old unspoken routine, it also reminds me a lot of God. Crowley falls in act of sin, and while God punished Crowley, She also forgives him for being a sinner because God forgives all sin. So Aziraphale forgives Crowley because again he has sinned. Again he has fallen.

At this point we realize Crowley did not just fall, that’s past tense. Rather, Crowley is falling. He continues to love, dares to show it, and thus suffers the consequences.

Lil rant incoming. I was watching a clip on an insta fan account of when Aziraphale and Crowley arrive at the theatre in 1941 and Azi is being all cute and excited and I noticed someone commented this:

And seriously I felt so shocked because I'm so used to our cozy little echo chamber here where we all adore the ineffable husbands.

The ineffables are dorky af, we know that. They are unapologetically ridiculous and goofy and that's part of what makes them so compelling. They are hilariously cartoonish but also have such profound depth and complexity. These characters are so incredibly special that they have impacted all of us here in an intense, visceral manner.

I'm rambling here but my point is... mah point is.... mah point IS... dolphins Silliness is important. What will feel cringey to the wrong people will be perceived as an endearing part of who you are by the right people. Be as weird as your nasty little heart desires. 

@ineffabildaddy - I remembered our "cool" discourse again while typing this!

the necessary anguish of the Good Omens 2 finale

Ah ok. So after 4 years of waiting post Season One and ten cumulative years of bookish fannery, I watched bonified New Content of Good Omens. And when those credits rolled, I sat there, not in my expected state of pleasant satisfaction, but in a state of abject shock.

I actually don’t know if I’ve ever had such a reaction to a show before. Or, rather, that I could still have such a reaction. I’m thirty, for goodness sakes – I was planning on being thrilled and charmed and entertained, not having my hands shake so much that it was hard to type a text. I wasn’t planning on losing an entire night of sleep because my heart wouldn’t stop pounding really hard, Neil. This was not expected. I had an estate sale to run the next day – by God, I needed that sleep.

Anyway. These are my thoughts on the season, and on this upswell of mourning/unhappiness at such a gut-wrenching ending. As always, this are my dumb opinions and nothing more; take with a grain of salt, etc. 

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Normally I'm not into Human AUs, but this one definitely made me reconsider. A delicious take, intriguing and (unconventionally, thrown-off-balance but somehow still) perfectly in-character.

high school tensimm au except they’re both unbearable losers.

ten is a science geek that spends 23 hours a day in a laboratory, sucks at every subject that isn’t a scientific one but somehow manages to pass the classes, teachers and students hate him because he’s just always raising his hand to say shit and sometimes he doesn’t even do that, he just says stuff out loud when someone else is supposed to answer AND ITS NOT EVEN ALWAYS CORRECT. he chainsmokes cigarettes when he’s working, he wears glasses even though he doesn’t need them because he thinks they give him a hot look but he looks even more nerdy than before, he wears a suit to school and cmon who does that?! yet somehow all the girls seem to fall for him, at least to flirt and kiss him, just to get dumped after the first month of dating.

the master is just the rich petty kid you have in your class that somehow manages to get good grades even if he’s subtly insulting the teachers in their faces, there is no subject he’s not good at. he looks down on people for dressing badly (although he mostly wears a black sweatshirt to school too), he thinks his family name opens the door to everything in his life, he tries to do everything to get extra credits, he insults people who aren’t good at subjects he redeems as “easy”. he fucks people when he’s bored, he drinks alcohol right after school and calls it a “pre-party” for the evening, he likes the feeling of getting beat up, he has a thing for trying to make pathetic older men submit to him.

and together they just make the most insufferable couple. they spend a day literally sucking each other’s face off in class and then the next day they avoid each other like the plague - just to make out against a wall in the garden at the end of the school day both with a black eye and a few more scars. they skip classes together and fuck in the janitors closet, they smoke in the bathroom and blame other kids if the alarm goes off, the master sometimes puts ounces of vodka in the doctor’s water bottle so he microdoses for like two weeks before the master takes it off and leaves him feeling odd for a month, the master seems completely aware of the doctor’s past stories with other girls but makes comments that have people thinking he’s going to murder them soon, the doctor once went on a full hour rant at a party about how he is the only one the master will ever need and he’ll fix him up by curing him and making him a sane person with his infinite care (and then threw up on the ground). they’re just silly.

Part 5 the End of Time

Last special with the 10th doctor so here’s a silly one

Funny (and kinda revealing) thing is that for years I’ve stuck to that moody picture of the Doctor walking through the clouds/smoke to the TARDIS as my lock screen wallpaper. Then I went through a couple of official posters for GO S1, then reverted to my trusted and almost monochrome Ten… and now this.

I see some parallels, so to say.

It was 20 years ago today!..

The first episode of Blackpool was aired on the BBC on 11 November 2004.

I can't even start to tell how much I love that show.