Hotwife Lifestyle - Understanding Our Man’s Hotwife Fantasy And How To Use That To Our Advantage

Hotwife Lifestyle - Understanding Our Man’s Hotwife Fantasy and How to Use That to Our Advantage

Hotwife Lifestyle - Understanding Our Man’s Hotwife Fantasy And How To Use That To Our Advantage

The fantasy of having a “Hotwife” is growing, in fact, research shows it is growing at a higher rate than a good majority of the other lifestyle alternatives, including the old staple of “swinging” and the modern “open relationship”.  Why is it that a fantasy that revolves around only one part of a relationship – the woman – going out and finding pleasure from another man more intriguing to an increasing number of men than going out and “getting some” for himself?  

Basic psychology tells us that men are highly competitive creatures.  They have a drive to compete with other males of the species for the best mate – this isn’t so much different than what happens in the animal kingdom.  Most men have an innate drive to compete with other men when it comes to the “best mate” or the “most attractive woman”.  With this being said, one of the reservations of most women who find out about their husband or partner’s Hotwife fantasy is that he is somehow “weaker” than the rest because he wants to give up his position as your only partner.  Is this really true, though?  Could the truth lie somewhere within today’s man’s loss of natural competition in everyday life, and a desire to maintain a level of competition after marriage or “monogamy”?  Is this weakness, or rather the ultimate confidence?  

Cuckholding aside, because this aspect of the fantasy requires a bit more in terms of a “woman led” relationship, and a bit more from the man in terms of a desire for mental sadomasochism, a good majority of men enjoy the idea that they have been able to “capture” the best mate and even when she’s out having amazing physical and emotional experiences with men who may have qualities that actually supersede their own – a better body, a larger cock, youth, more prowess in bed – their woman actually WANTS to come back to them at the end of the night.  While most Hotwife-Husbands do get some level of turn-on from the jealousy and the possibility that their Hotwife may actually be enjoying their dates more than they enjoy being “at home”, the overwhelming desire is the competition and the “win” in terms of having a wife who chooses them again and again even after being allowed to go out and have other men.  

As Hotwives, we may be the focus of the fantasy, but there is that deeper and more psychological desire of a man who, even after committing to one woman, is able to compete with other males sexually.  This is why the desire for “reclaiming” a Hotwife after a date is so strong – it’s actually been scientifically proven that men who are able to reclaim a partner after she has been with someone else have an increase in testosterone levels, which means stronger desire, more powerful erections, longer lasting erections, and an overall stronger sex drive.  So, what does this mean for us as Hotwives?

He Enjoys the Jealousy, Go with It

As women we’ve learned that inducing some jealousy can actually be a good thing when it comes to dating – before we’ve found our “person”.  We use our female prowess to keep the men who we are seeing guessing…why?  Because they seem more interested in us when it seems as though we may not be 100% there.  So, if this works in the dating world, why wouldn’t it work once we’re married? In contrast, women typically don’t respond as well, or in the same way to jealousy – we tend to worry, question, and sometimes shut down if we feel that he might be “just not that into us”.  Naturally, because of our own feelings on the matter, we tend to avoid making our men jealous once we’ve committed to them, because we, ourselves don’t want to feel as though we’re in constant competition with other, more attractive, sexier, younger, etc., women.  Why would we do something to the man that we love that we, ourselves, would hate?

For men, though, and especially those with Hotwife fantasies, jealousy is a big component and tool for us to keep our men hot and bothered.  Sometimes just the mere mention of being flirted with by that cute guy at our favorite restaurant, or our interest in the sexy personal trainer at the gym is enough to send our men into a sexual frenzy.  It doesn’t take a lot to feed the fantasy.  It’s not ALL about dates and recounting how well we got worked over in the bedroom (and how much we loved it), though that is the ultimate turn on for our men, it’s also about the little things – the mention of our interest in someone else, the sexy messages that we send to potential lovers or Bulls, the “tease” of how much we loved what our last Bull did for us and how much we’re looking forward to doing it again.  Remember, this ignites the “competition” element of things, which is natural for men.

The More You Enjoy it, the More He Enjoys it

You may be thinking, “But I’m doing it for him, I’m not doing it for myself” (a common theme by A LOT of Hotwives), but in reality, our men WANT us to enjoy our encounters. They want to hear about what this “other guy” did for or to is that sent us over the edge, and yes, they want to hear what we liked better about the “other guy”.  I know it seems crazy, because we don’t want to imagine our men, even if we did allow them to be with other women, thinking that their “others” were better, sexier, hotter or had something that we don’t.  That’s because we don’t have that “competition drive” like our men do.

Let’s face it, despite what our men tell us – “It’s all about your pleasure” or “I don’t get anything out of it unless you’re enjoying it, because I love you so much” – this isn’t some ultimate “unselfish” thing our men are doing for us.  These things come out of their mouths, but what they are really saying is “I want to know that you came three times while he was fucking you, and you STILL want to come home to me”.  It’s their kink, and we have to understand it.  

So, if you’ve actually taken the step into the world of Hotwifing, you’re going to have to learn how to properly tease your man into believing that, just maybe, your Bull was better than him in some ways.  Whenever you think “But I’m only doing it for him”, follow that us with “I’m doing it for him and he WANTS to know that I absolutely enjoyed it”.  Find some aspect of your encounter that was mind-blowing, and recount, in great detail exactly what it was that sent you over the edge.  This may require a little bit of embellishment, and that’s OKAY…trust me…embellishment is your friend in this situation.  Tell your man about your Bull’s amazing cock, how good if felt, how good he tasted, how fantastic he was at oral sex, etc.  These are the things that will ramp up that competition streak in your man and make him want to reclaim you with increased vigor and desire.  

The More You Want Someone Else, The More Your Man Wants You

Again, you’re playing on the competition and the teasing aspect of things here…  The more that you act as if you WANT to be a Hotwife, the more that your husband or partner is going to WANT you.  His desire for you is going to skyrocket, his sexual desire for you is going to make it so that he’s ready to chew his own leg off to get you back in bed.  I have experienced this firsthand many times…if I am completely honest about an “encounter” and admit to “D” that my Bull was lacking in some way, or I didn’t quite “get there”, he isn’t nearly as turned on as when I tell him about how amazing things were.  I don’t like or believe in lying, but I do advocate for being selective and stretching the truth…maybe your lover wasn’t the best at giving oral sex, but maybe he was an amazing kisser, so a good answer would be “he was amazing with his mouth” and leave the rest up for interpretation.  

We’re women.  We are strong and capable and we are smart.  And the truth is, this is a GAME we are playing for and with our husbands/partners, so we need to get our heads into the game. Furthermore, this is an intellectual game, and we need to use our intellects to get to where we want to be.  Where do we want to be?  We want to have a husband/partner who is absolutely drooling over us, believes we are the ultimate sexual goddess, and in is jealous enough to realize that in order to “compete” they will need to step up their own game in order to “keep” us satisfied – be that with amazing sex, extra romance, other rewards, or all of the above.  

Happy Hotwifing!

-S

More Posts from Cuckinlove and Others

9 years ago

When I introduced my wife to the idea of locking me up in a male chastity device, she was hesitant because she thought it was perverted, but she went along for my sake. That was then. Now, her mind has changed after locking me up for a week and wearing the key to work on her necklace; after giving me nothing but teasing all week while requiring me to give her head every day until she has mind-blowing orgasms; after giving me a list of chores every day and demanding (not asking) that I do them; and after a week of me doting on her like she has never known in our 16-year marriage (even when I was trying to woo her to marry me during our courtship), jumping to do her will immediately after her every command, and even begging her to allow me to do more to please her. Now she says of my chastity device "I love it! I would gladly have paid five times what they charged us. " Now, when I suggested that, since the week trial was over, she probably would choose to lock me up only on special occasions, rather than every day, she replied (with a sinister look on her face), "I don't know about that. You need to know that I have REALLY enjoyed how things went this past week..." This morning, when I asked if she was going to lock me up again this week, she grinned a sly grin and said "yes." Guess who's relationship just changed forever?...

5 years ago

How To Ask Her To Become A Slutwife

How To Ask Her To Become A Slutwife

There are only 2 ways that a wife can become a slutwife.

The first is initiated internally, within her. Internal drive is something inside of her makes her desire to sleep with another man, to have attention from another, to seek a relationship outside of marriage. Internal drive is often the cause of cheating and also a great indicator of slutwife potential. Internal drive is absolutely necessary for a good slutwife.

The second is initiated by external influence. External influence is done by things that influence her internal drive and eventually make her seek the attention of another man and look at the possibility of sleeping with another. External influence can lead to cheating when the husband is not involved, but can lead to a very good slutwife/cuck style relationship when the husband is very involved.

That being said, you can safely assume that her internal drive needs to be kicked in, while simultaneously being a big part of her external influence, in order to get the slutwife of your dreams.

Now, there is only one realistic way of activating her internal drive and being her biggest external influence, you have to ask her to be your slutwife. Why? Because if her internal drive was raging, she would have asked you or already be cheating on you. If that is the case, you don’t need much from this post. For everyone else, it will be up to you to make it happen. You have to push forward.

When people ask me during private conversations, this is usually the biggest hurdle they have trouble getting over. How to ask?

Asking out of the blue can be very intimidating to most, because that is what most envision asking the question. In reality, there are many ways to lead-up to asking the question and warm her up to the idea. Here we will cover a few.

How To Ask Her To Become A Slutwife

1. Let’s Watch Porn - Contrary to what some think, women can enjoy porn as much as men, they just perceive things differently. We have a natural curiosity towards sexuality and anything taboo, so exploring through porn is very common. Set up some time with your partner to explore porn together. Find out what she is curious about, see if there is something on her mind. If she mentions something, explore that topic. If she doesn’t know, guide her towards your goals. Topics like hotwife, threesome, size queens, and BBC are good starting points. When watching a video on a hotwife, mention how hot you think the scenario is and how much it turns you on. If watching BBC type video, mention how hot you think it looks watching a white woman being a slut for a black man, how black men seem better equipped for porn, and how they seem to have better endurance/stamina. Remember, regardless of the topic, only explore one topic at a time, give her mind time to absorb the idea. Towards the end of the video when you are both feeling hot, mention how you think she could do things better than the girl in the video, to give her a perspective of herself in that situation. Finish by giving her some very pleasurable sex and saying that you can’t wait to set up another night like that. This type of activity will open up the floor for bringing up the idea of her having sex with another man after doing it a few times.

How To Ask Her To Become A Slutwife

2. Someone hit on her - If you are with a woman who’s looks rate anything above a 1, chances are she will be getting hit on at some point. You may witness it, or she may tell you about it some time later. The point is to be excited about it when she tells you, and ask her to give you every detail. You can then proceed to eat her out and give her a proper orgasm as you mention little suggestions where she could have done more. (Little things are her smiling more when she gets hit on, giving her phone number, adding him on facebook, wearing something slightly more revealing, etc.) This will teach her that you are cool with her having attention from other men, it turns you on, and that you think about her taking it slightly further. By eating her out while talking about it, it aligns these experiences with other good and pleasurable experiences, thus building a correlation between being hit on and pleasure. This opens up the doors for her to seek more attention and eventually pushing further. As far as asking her to be a slutwife when the time comes, you can go back to one of these scenarios and mention how you imagine her going all the way, how hot the idea sounds, and what are her thoughts on doing it in real life.

How To Ask Her To Become A Slutwife

3. Asking her to Show Off More - You can always ask your wife to show off a bit more, then compliment her on how hot she looks. This doesn’t mean asking her to go full slutmode right off the bat (we will cover more on how to get her there in another post). You will simply ask her to show off a bit more. For example, have her pull her blouse down to show off a bit more cleavage, or let her skirt ride a bit higher than normal. Go out with her and mention how sexy she looked, how you caught a few guys staring, and how much it turns you on. This will no doubt bring a “Aren’t you jealous?” Your reply will be that you are not because you love her, know that she is yours, and that it turns you on when other guys admire your sexy wife. Tell her how proud you are to show off how sexy she is and that you do not believe you should keep such a beauty all to yourself. Over time, as you get her to dress sexier and she becomes more comfortable, this will set things up for the slutwife topic (More on that soon).

How To Ask Her To Become A Slutwife

4. The Sex Shop Experience-Another way to ease her into talking about her becoming a slutwife is by taking her to an adult store. Not into a cheap small store that looks raunchy, go into an adult megaplex with a variety of stuff. The two of you will go on a date to explore different sexual kinks and to simply look around. While there, see if she is curious about anything in particular, costumes, toys, bondage, etc. and go with it. No one should know her kinks better than you, so go with it. If she is following your lead, start by going to the dvd section and explore your fantasy. Show her some BBC/3 some/ or slutwife DVD and tell her how it looks really interesting. Ask her what she thinks about it. Move on to the costumes and ask her which she finds sexiest. Go with her answers and suggest something sexy yourself, than have her visualize herself wearing it. If its something she could pull off on Halloween, mention how she should wear it on Halloween and turn some heads. Go to the toys section and see if any catch her interest. Go with it. Then point out some large dildos as well. Have her hold them and ask her how she thinks one would feel inside of her if she took her time to ease it in. Tell her how much it would turn you on to see her take one. You should aim to buy something that interests her from each section, to show her how much you lover her sexuality and want her to explore it. At the same time, you are dropping small hints as to your desires and feeling out her interests.

How To Ask Her To Become A Slutwife

5. Who Would You Sleep With?-You will ask the question that if she could have sex with any one person in the world with zero consequences, who it would be. She may likely choose a celebrity. If she can speak about it openly, ask her to name another. Have her pick out about 3. If she insists that she couldn’t, then tell her that if she had to, due to a life and death situation, who would she choose. You can also apply a world catastrophe situation where you are gone and she is needed yo help repopulate the world and she has her pick of men. The only point here is to get her to talk about how she would have sex with other men. She may counter by asking you who you would sleep with. You will respond with a girl you have seen in porn as a hotwife, going black, doing a gangbang, etc. and you will say that because you would think back and ask her about that scene she did and it would really turn you on.

How To Ask Her To Become A Slutwife

6. What is your Fantasy?- Last but not least, ask her what her fantasies are. It is important that you know her fantasies and curiosities if you don’t already. If you have done some of the stuff above, you might have done enough to get her curious about the hotwife scenarios, BBC, huge cocks, threesomes, etc. if not, just get to know her fantasies. When she asks about yours, this is where you tell her. Your fantasy is for her to be a sexy slutwife. Remember that you are not demanding anything, you are informing how hot you find the idea. (Go back to post #1) there is a chance she may be into it and willing to explore it further. If not, tell her how you would still like to roleplay that along with her own fantasies.

With the tools above, you should be able to ease into letting her know you love the idea of her becoming a slutwife and gives you a set up to gauge her interests. It also serves towards becoming her biggest external influence and could possibly kick in her internal drive, This on it’s own may not be the home-run, but it certainly sets things up to get her to fulfill your fantasy.

8 years ago

She Cuckolded Me!

I am now officially a cuckold.  My wife has cuckolded me 5 times now with a guy from work.  I’ll post pics/audio/video when I can.  His cock is longer and thicker than mine and he has a lot of endurance and she loves it.  She reels off multiple orgasms every time she is with him and brings me home a sore, gaping pussy smelling of his semen.  

Although she would like to continue with this guy, he is getting serious in a relationship with another woman and it looks like he will not be available much longer.  She is now looking for her next conquest....

10 years ago

Yep.  I'm that sprung!

The Retractable Leash Is For Days When She Feels A Little Under The Weather.
The Retractable Leash Is For Days When She Feels A Little Under The Weather.
The Retractable Leash Is For Days When She Feels A Little Under The Weather.
The Retractable Leash Is For Days When She Feels A Little Under The Weather.

The retractable leash is for days when she feels a little under the weather.

2 years ago

Orgasm Control: A List of Benefits

I get a lot of questions about the benefits for me and for my husband about the benefits of structured orgasm control as part of addressing the issue of “mismatched libidos” in heterosexual relationships. For many people, as soon as they make a start on this journey, a range of benefits become clear pretty quickly. So, in this case, I believe the requests for providing a list benefits are for people who are still in the process of deciding if this approach is for them.

The short answer is - yes, your life (and sex life) will change for the better. Give it a try.

The second short answer - yes, use a chastity cage. While it is possible to practise orgasm control without one, the benefits for you, but especially for him, of using a chastity cage are exponential. Perhaps the list of benefits below will elucidate why:

Control vs Neglect

In most heterosexual, long-term relationships, women have a significantly lower sex drive than their male partners. Men have less sex than they would ideally like. In this sense, marriage means that females control the allocation of sex. Already. However, without a deliberate structure and communication around the element of this control, the mismatched libido is interpreted by the male as ‘neglect’ or the feeling of not being desired. This can drive the male to pornography, masturbation or ‘nagging for sex’, which puts unwanted pressure on you, and is a serious turn-off.

When orgasm control is discussed and structured as part of the couple’s sexual dynamic, the male’s perception moves from being ‘neglected’ to ‘controlled’. The latter is highly arousing, and the sexual dynamics flips on its head. By controlling his sexual release, you as a couple are indicating that it has a ‘value’ far greater than when he is simply free to masturbate at will. His greatest physical reward, and the oxytocin, bonding, dopamine rush that follows becomes linked to you, not to Pornhub.

More Sex, More Orgasms (For YOU)

Orgasm control is about controlling the MALE orgasm, not yours. The worst thing you can do is be sexually inactive between release windows. Rather just call the whole thing off now - it will not work.

Rather, you can and should have frequent orgasms - and he will love giving them to you. My partner and I have sex frequently outside of his release window. I unlock him and we have standard sex - the only difference is that he is not allowed to cum. He goes slower, uses toys, users his hands and tongue - whatever he needs to do to follow the rules - and I can deliciously and *selfishly* enjoy it. Once we're done, he is locked back up until next time.

This is what he expects and desires - don't feel bad for one second. Stop thinking in the old school "Sex is about the male being satisfied" mindset. It is mindblowing for him in every way - both mentally and physically.

Reigniting the Desire

As has been said on this blog before, males are programmed to ‘move on’ emotionally after ejaculating. Orgasm leads to a spike in prolactin which is a ‘shut off valve’ for intimacy and sexual desire. Frequent masturbation is therefore a total intimacy killer. Controlling the male orgasm leads to increases in oxytocin focused on you as his key objects of desire. He is heavily sexually aroused and his desire for you will skyrocket. Now, he is fully aware that he can’t do anything about it until his scheduled release, so it translates as increased intimacy, and increased energy for other things.

No Pressure for Sex

Modern marriages are defined by women ‘feeling bad’ every time they are not up for sex. The perception of old-world society is that it is the women’s duty to provide sex whenever the male desires. With chastity and orgasm control, this is completely reversed. Sex is not the goal, and the ongoing sexual rush of the denial is what the male will savor the most.

We have PIV (penis in vagina) sex frequently. Most often this is outside of his release window, so he knows that he is not allowed to orgasm, and after I am finished, he is re-locked. It's a mind-screw and a challenge for him, but he absolutely LOVES it!

Chastity is Effortless

With him in chastity, I can do all of this without really having to do much. A bit of attention here and there, a bit of teasing and he is at a constant, positive simmer. It is about communication, structure and commitment.

Release Days are Effortless

When I do allow him an orgasm, this too can be as effortless as you could possibly imagine. On release days, his excitement is so high that bringing him to climax can take as little as a few seconds. This is about “release” - after weeks locked up he will not be able to last very long. Sometimes he will cum just by taking the cage off... In which case, job done 😂.

I usually start by having him bring me to orgasm as usual - with his tongue, hands or a toy. Now it's his turn (for once!).

First decision - do you want him to have his release while in the cage or unlocked?

Caged: it's about balls and nipples. I recommend one hand plays with his nips while the other pulls, squeezes and strokes his balls. Then begin tapping his balls at a regular rhythm, building intensity slowly. Tell him he has permission to cum... Keep tapping and in a few minutes he will come to the edge. He is to ask permission one more time before he about to cum. As he is coming, tap / slap harder until he is finished.

Unlocked: Take off the cage, grip his balls tightly and pull them away from his body, back and forth. Try to touch his nub as little as possible. At most, use a slow, infrequent stroke with a single finger from the base of his nub up the shaft to the tip. He must ask permission just as he is about to cum. At this point, tighten your grip and pull his balls away from his body and hold them there until he is finished.

Tip 1: If you do unlock him for release, always relock directly after he orgasms. This significantly reduces the "drop" he will experience after orgasm and will push him through the 2-3 grouchiness period much smoother. He loves it if I put the cage on him, but if you prefer he locks himself, straight after his release, firmly tell him that it's time to go back in the cage.

Tip 2: Feed it to him! Tell him to clean up with his tongue or at least lick it off your hand. Recycling is important 😂.

Cages Look Sexy

I think of chastity cages as jewellery which is very aesthetically pleasing. Unlocked penises flop about, lean to one side, grow and shrink unpredictably and are often pretty badly manicured. When locked in a cage, everything is so neat. Males will need to do a bit of gardening down there to make it as comfortable as possible. Everything is held in place. His nub is encased and immobilized. His balls are held tight and presented forward. He will want to wear tight underwear or swimwear for comfort purposes, which presents such a neat little package. Every time I see the cage I am reminded that he is doing this for me, and I get a little shiver down my spine. It just looks better, and I love it!

Arousal on Demand

Males think about sex all the time. The vast majority of sexual thoughts and corresponding erections go completely ignored. When locked in chastity, these sexual thoughts (and erections) are contained, and are linked to you as the keyholder. This is highly arousing for the male, and will feel like direct attention from you - even though you may not even be in the same postcode. The cage works for you full-time, and is there whenever the male is aroused. Extremely powerful!

Discipline

The chastity cage helps males to stick to the rules. Most males masturbate significantly more than you will ever imagine. For the vast majority, they will NEVER have gone 21 days or more without masturbating since they first discovered it in their teens. With a cage, masturbation is simply off the table. They must direct this energy elsewhere. Which leads to :

Weight Loss and Conditioning

All of this extra energy must go somewhere, and in most cases, this is directed to physical exercise and conditioning. Many women report that time in chastity has lead to significant weight loss and body sculpting in their males. Motivation and drive are seriously tangible chastity benefits that you will notice as little as 7 days in.

Service

Oxytocin is the courting hormone. Increases in this wonder drug caused by orgasm control will often lead to a far more focused, attentive and service-oriented mentality. Whether conscious on his part or not, I notice a happier, more helpful male, with a higher attention-to-detail and eagerness to please. Use this as you see fit!

A Better Sex Life

Most importantly, chastity and orgasm denial will improve your sex life. Sex does not equate to penetration anymore, although it certainly can if you wish. Unlock him at any point in the schedule for sex of you're keen for it - it's just that outside of the release window, he will have to find a way not to orgasm. You are the focus until his release date!

Most importantly, "sex" in long-term marriages is about sexual interaction - intimacy, honesty, communication and care. This is why you are doing this in the first place. Rewire your thinking as a couple, and become a highly engaged, balanced and aligned sexual partnership.

Conclusions

These are just some of the many benefits that are associated with the exciting journey of male orgasm control. Drop some more in the comments and I can add to this ever-growing list.

10 years ago

Learn the secret, ladies...

You Will Get A Lot More Pleasure In Any Way You Want, And He Will Be Stuck In A State Of Arousal That

You will get a lot more pleasure in any way you want, and he will be stuck in a state of arousal that keeps him addicted to you more then he could have been before, he will do more chores, he will be more attentive, passionate, loving, last longer, be eager to please you, and will never cheat.

> Top 10 chastity / Forced denial benefits <

3 years ago

THE 10 BEST POSITIONS FOR ANAL

All you faithful readers know I’m a big fan of knocking on a girl’s back door.   It feels great.   It’s naughty.   What’s not to like about it?

Nothing… for the guy.

For the girl, anal can often be traumatic.   I’ve posted a bunch of times on how to prepare for anal sex.   You can type “anal” in my search bar and get a ton of info.  But let me highlight some things:

Anal sex requires preparation to keep it from being messy.

Anal sex requires relaxation and trust.  If the girl isn’t relaxed… if she tenses up… that’s when it hurts.

Anal sex requires a lot of lube.   LOTS of lube.

Anal sex requires you to begin small.   A finger in the ass.  Then two fingers.  Then your cock.

Anal sex requires you to start slow.   Slide it in and pump with short, slow strokes.

Anal sex requires foreplay.  Because again, a woman needs to be really relaxed and into it before her ass will open.   

What I haven’t written about in much detail is good positions for anal.  I’ve said, “If it hurts, try the woman on top.”  But beyond that, nothing much.  That changes with this post.  

I want to share with you ten positions that can be great for anal.  They’re great for a variety of reasons: intimacy, pleasure for him, pleasure for her, comfort, etc.   I’ll spell out the benefits of each one.  They are listed in no particular order.  But if you read the articles about preparing for anal that I have written and then learn these ten positions, I guarantee you that you can comfortably (and erotically!) add this very enjoyable aspect to your sex life.  

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THE REVERSE COWGIRL RUMP RIDER

image

He lies on his back, legs together.  She straddles him, facing away and bounces with his dong-a-long in her bonk-a-donk.

This position is great for her, not only because it lets her control how deep and fast her ass is being fucked, but also because it provides a great angle.  He’s going straight in, with a slight upward press.  Should be comfortable.

It’s a great position for him because of the view - her bulbous back pillows being split by his love meat.   

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THE SPHINCTER SPOON

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The key to this spooning technique is that the girl pulls her legs up close to her chest, maybe using her arms behind her knees to hold them.  When the legs are pulled up like that, the external spincter muscle (i.e. the asshole) loosens some.   

When the guy slides in, he goes as deep as possible.  But motion is limited.  

This position is all about intimacy.   There is a ton of body contact.  He can whisper in her ear or kiss her neck.   Guys, you also can play with her nipples or even reach between her legs and rub gently.  

This is a great starter position for the first anal of the night, precisely because there isn’t much motion.   It lets her slowly relax her booty.

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THE SUPER SODOMY SIDE SLIDE

image

In this position, the girl lies facedown, then pulls one leg up some.  So her one leg is straight down.  With her other leg, she’s pulled her knee up close to even with her waist.  This tilts her slightly onto her side.  The guy then straddles the one leg that is straight down.  He spreads her cheeks, and slides in.   

What makes this position great for her is how relaxing it is.   He can rub her back while he’s fucking her ass.  It also doesn’t allow for very deep penetration.   

For him there are two pleasures.  First, as he pumps, his scrotum is going to be rubbing against the smooth skin on the back of her leg.  It feels amazing.  Secondly, each time he thrusts in, her one butt cheek - the one of the leg that is straight out - is going to hit him right in what is sometimes called the “inguinal canal” area, where the guy’s leg meets his torso.  The firm but soft tush pressing in there… fuck!  Feel so good!

Guys, an added little treat for her…  She she first gets in this position, get down there, slide a finger in her vajayjay, palm facing down, curling the finger slightly.  That will place your fingertip on her g-spot.  While you work the finger in and out, let your tongue press on her asshole, just causing it to spread a little.  She’ll love it.   

______________________________

THE DALLYING IN HER DERRIERE

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This is a lovely, slow, lazy way to pump her rump.   You are on her side.   She is on her back, with her legs hitched over you.  She can keep them together or spread them apart, depending on what she finds more comfortable.   

This is also a very intimate position, as it allows you to see each other’s faces.   Motion is limited, as her legs hooked over him prevent him from pumping too hard.   He can play with her chest or her clit.  She can reach down and rub his balls while he fucks her.    

____________________________

THE ASS-N-CLITTY

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Another variation of women-on top.  The girl straddles the guy, cowgirl style, facing him, her knees wide apart.   She puts his hotdog in her buns, then leans back, using her hands for support.   And she bounces and bounces and bounces.  

The plus for her is that she gets to control tempo and depth.   And again, it’s a great angle - straight up her dark tunnel.  

In addition, in that position her guy has clear access to her clitty-cat.   He can pet it.  Guys, in this position, I recommend using your thumb.  Lick it so it’s slick.  Then press it down on top of her clit and roll it, like a pea bring rolled under your finger.

Or you can take a finger and curl it in, making a “come here” motion.  That puts your finger on her g-spot.  Again, roll it around like a pea under your fingertip.     

For guys, not only do you have an amazing view, but it actually is a very tight fit.  With her knees apart like that, her glute muscles get pushed together.  Thus, your shaft is cradled in soft butt cheek.  Feels amazing.

True story.   I have had a girlfriend squirt all over my abs in this position while I was in her ass.  

____________________________

THE CATHOLIC BIRTH CONTROL

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You wouldn’t think missionary position would be great for anal, but it really, really is.   However, you probably need to have her hips tilted up.   You can do this simply by placing a few pillows under her hips.   

This is another position aimed at intimacy.  The couple can kiss and caress even as he’s tapping her tushie.   

This position also allows for only shallow penetration, thus it’s great for a girl who, try as she might, believes she can only take the tip.  It’s also great for a guy who is well endowed, as maybe only the first two or three inches will get in.

Guys, be careful in this position.   It’s easy to slip out.  And what can really hurt a girl is when you slip out and then don’t aim carefully when you slide back in.  It forces her anus to stretch in funny ways!   No bueno.   

____________________________

THE HERO, POOTER-POUNDER STYLE

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In the kamasutra, “the Hero” position is woman on her back, with her legs pulled up to the degree that her pelvis tilts up.   This can be done a variety of ways.  She can grab under he knees and pull them back.  He can grab her ankles and push them back.   The point is, her legs are in the air, spread apart, and her hips are tilted up.  This gives him a straight shot to her pooter-palace!

After six positions which were more gentle, we now get to the ones which will be a bit harder.   Thus, it requires a bit more experience.  These are anal positions you might try after you have being doing one of the first six for awhile.  So your rump is all relaxed and ready for a good ramming.  ;) 

For the girls, the fun part of this position is that as well as any of them, you have access to your sugared almond.   While your man drills your dumper, rub that thing like you are a DJ and it’s god-damned New Years Eve.  You might cum.  

Guys, you need to understand that with her hips tilted and legs spread, you could go really, really deep.  That’s great, if she says it’s great.  If not, then this is a position where you have to exercise self control and only use the first four inches or so.    

__________________________________

THE DOGGY IN THE DONK

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I don’t want to exaggerate here, so I’ll say it carefully.  This is the biggest fantasy of every man on earth.    There is nothing like getting a hot girl face down, ass up, and smashing her onion.   

What does this give to the guys?   The best site on earth.  When you can see your cock sliding in and out, wedged between those breathtaking cheeks… when that booty meet shakes with each thrust, a slight ripple working through each one… wow.  I have a tear in my eye just thinking about it.   

In addition to the view, if the girl has warmed up to anal and can handle it, this is the position in which the guy can go his hardest.  The angle of his cock in her ass, especially if she puts her chest down on the bed, is such that it is a very, very smooth fit.   Her rectum is in its natural position.   So he can grab her hips and pound away.

For the girl, doggystyle anal can be either heaven or purgatory.   He’s going to be deep in your ass.   But in this position, he stimulates some of the nerves that are actually located in the vaginal wall.    If a girl is going to cum during anal, this position will probably be it.  While the guy is reaming her from behind, she’ll reach down and play with her clit.   If she can cum this way, it will be so intense her back might break.   

__________________________________

THE BEST LAP DANCE EVER

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This is yet another woman on top position.   The man sits in a chair.  Guys, use a kitchen chair, not a big ass recliner.  It gives you more range of motion.   The woman come and sits on his lap, with his man-meat in her moneymaker.  

There are two variations to this. The woman can put her legs between his legs.  If she does this, she can put her hands on his knees and bounce.  Or the woman can put her legs outside his.   Unless she has really long legs, she might not be able to bounce as well.  But she can grind and rock.    It’s a amazing sensation when you grind in that position, ladies!  It’s like you are trying to break our cock off inside your can.   

Guys, if she goes with her legs outside yours, why not reach around  and flick her on-off switch lightly.   It’s ether that your you make it rain!  

_________________________________

THE 3AM AT DANIEL’S HOUSE

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This is a variation on doggystyle - doing it while standing, with the woman bent over something.  It’s one of my favorites, hence the name.  (Back off!  When you get your own blog, you can name sex positions after yourself too!)

It’s a really comfortable position for the woman.   She’s braced on a chair or couch.  She might even be able to rest on it.   A variation is if she picks up one leg and rests her knee on the object.  A good example of that is a bathroom counter.  She leans over it and puts one knee up on it while I explore her third-entry.   

It’s great for the guy for the same reason doggystyle is.  It’s a nice view.  He can grab the hips and go hard.   Because it’s a comfortable position, it’s also great for prolonged anal.   There’s no need to pound out your nut in 30 seconds.  Get her in this position and spend a good 20 minutes working her bubble over.   

This position can also be very pleasurable for the woman too.  There is a muscle cluster that starts in your lower back, runs through the glutes, and down the back of the legs to the heel.  That’s why if you walk funny in a bad shoe, it can hurt your back.  It’s the longest muscle cluster in the human body.  When a girl is bent over like this, that muscle cluster is tight.   And so as she tenses her anus slightly (which is natural to do as your ass is being fucked), she’ll feel that through her entire lower body.   And guys, if you can reach around and play with her clit and make her cum in this position, she can collapse.  The shudder it sends through her legs literally floors her.  

_______________________________________

And there you have it, faithful readers.   Is this every anal position I know.  Please!  I’m Daniel Fucking Davis.   This is the tip of the iceberg.   But hopefully if you like these, you can put your own spins and variances on them, and have plenty of variety to your hot, hot booty sex!

Now, if you like this, please reblog!   Cause let’s face it.  This is good advice.  

Credit for all the illustrations goes to wewomen.com.  They have their own take on “best of” positions.  I just used their illustrations, which I thought were cute!  

7 years ago

Husband shoe resource

cuckinlove - A Cuckold In Love
5 years ago

Chastity

Chastity is a curious fetish. It’s curious because it’s a fetish that morphs into a lifestyle with relative ease. It’s also a fetish that is just as addicting for the wearer, as it is for the key holder. The part that makes chastity the most curious however, is just how quickly it can change the mindset of the wearer and key holder. It doesn’t take very long at all to recognize just how powerful D/s can be. Chastity does however, have a few learning curves to it, but they can also be a part of the fun.

When starting out with chastity, it can take a bit of time to get the right fit. There’s a lot of components that need to fit together just right. Too tight can mean serious health consequences, where as too loose might mean the cage falls off without the key. Taking the time to figure out the right fit will beneficial for longer term wear, and putting an end to pinching, or chafing.

It’s important that the base ring fits snugly, just before it cuts off blood circulation. When you’re first starting out, you’ll find that over time, you’ll need to gradually move to smaller rings as the body adjusts.  When you’re just starting out with chastity, the male body is going to rebel against it for the first few weeks. In fact, the device will likely not be able to be worn overnight because in the middle of the night, nocturnal erections will prevent him from sleeping. Not because it’s painful, but because the penis is trying to push the cage away from the body. This causes the scrotum to pull against the ring causing it to stretch. This stretching makes him feel a burning sensation that doesn’t really hurt, but it’s a strong enough feeling to prevent sleep.

Don’t worry, with a few repeated attempts to wear the device overnight, the scrotum will stretch and the burning will cease until the cage can be worn all night long. All attempted erections can be slept through, and he will awake as a very horny locked submissive. Being able to stay locked for a full night is a milestone. The stretching/burning sensation will come back when attempting to do 2 - 3 or more nights in a row, because the body is still not used to it fully. Eventually all this will stop, and he’ll be able to stay chaste indefinitely, without losing any sleep.

Chafing is another concern, because it’s a device attached to a moving part of the body, the ring will tend or irritate the skin and cause it to go raw. One good way to combat this, is to use a clear diaper rash ointment which works like a lube, or remove the cage until it heals then try again. One good brand of ointment is Penaten daily clear protection cream, its on Amazon. This can also be used inside the cage, because it repels moisture. It prevents any kind of infections from sweat and daily use while also allowing the penis to slide around in the cage instead of sticking to the sides. It makes it much easier for him to go pee, without struggling to line his penis up with the hole.

Over time as the body get used to the cage, the skin will stretch, and jumping down a size in the base ring may be a good idea. The cage will often begin to pull forward after a few days of wear, making pullout very possible, if not tempting. Moving to a smaller ring at this point, is a good idea.

Attempted erections over time will lessen to a degree. Not because he’s losing the ability to get hard, quite the opposite in fact, when he’s allowed to be hard, he’ll be harder than he’s ever been! However, his body will have learned that it cannot win against the cage, and will accept defeat. It will not try to get erect as often, which means, his penis will be flaccid most of the time.  If you look at the cage, and see where his flaccid penis is resting, it will likely be a short distance away front the end of the cage. This means, upgrading to a smaller cage would be beneficial.

The cage should fit around the flaccid penis so that it rests touching the end of the cage. Not straining against it. The object is not to cram the penis into the cage, so that even when its resting its backing up into his body. The cage should match his flaccid size, so that when he attempts to get hard, he’s gently denied. Causing him to squirm in frustration and submission.

One other important part to remember when fitting a chastity cage, is the space between the base ring and the cage itself. The gap should not be very wide, it should be wide enough to enable circulation. It should compress the scrotum, so that the balls are snugly held in place. If the gap is too wide, when he gets cold, or is active, or even sleeping, his testicles might slip through that gap, and that can cause pain or injury. Especially if one testicle can slip through and the other cannot.

It is for reasons exactly like that, that the submissive should have access to a chastity key at all times. It doesn’t mean he gets to keep a key on his key chain. But perhaps in a sealed, stapled and signed envelope, that can’t be opened without being noticed. It’s also something that can cause him to be extra horny, knowing the key is within his reach, but he can’t use it without his key holder knowing. So safety first, can be beneficial in more ways than one.

It can be a lot of fun to figure out the right size, and experiment with chastity, it’s really the perfect way to figure out if chastity is for you or not. Once you get past the fitting stages, and getting the body used to it, the real fun begins. It’s the point where, she truly gets to decide if and when, he gets unlocked.

A whole new psychological level unlocks with chastity. One very interesting aspect of chastity is that it’s often a male driven fantasy, but the benefits of it hit the female harder. After a few days of keeping him under lock and key, she often thinks about it throughout the day, and really enjoys the extra attention he’s trying to pour onto her. His puppy dog eyes, his eagerness to please, the housework gets done, dinner gets made and she just gets to relax. A few days of this, and she begins to feel his frustration. She can feel it like he feels it, but in a different way. She feels the power of it, where as, he feels the helplessness of it.

This power that she feels, makes her feel desired, while at the same time, having her own desire. It’s an exquisite mix of emotion that helps her to discover just how much power she has, which gives her the confidence to become a little more dominant. It doesn’t take her very long to realize she loves the idea of chastity. This is a realization that even the submissive hasn’t had yet. She’s leap frogged his understanding of chastity, and it has now become her idea and her fantasy, and no longer his.

It can actually take the submissive a substantially longer period of time to realize how powerful chastity really is. At first he may have been the one pushing it, trying to move faster, wanting her to be more dominant. However, once she truly gets it, she’s going to be taking control in ways he’s not yet comfortable with. Especially when it comes to sex, and realizing that he doesn’t actually get to even touch himself while pleasuring her. The intensity of that alone, can make a submissive realize what he’s gotten himself into!

This might make him become resistant, to be rebellious at first. He may even want out of the cage, just as an excuse to masturbate. It’s okay, if he seriously wants out, and doesn’t want to submit any further, let him out. Within a short period of time, a couple days, or a couple weeks, he’ll miss it. Once a submissive has had a small taste of chastity, especially well fitting chastity, it’s nearly impossible for him to ignore it for long. It calls to him. The feeling of being locked is a feeling that is so addicting, so powerful, that he’ll be begging to be locked again.

This time around he’ll understand more of what he’s gotten himself into, and will be more cooperative. Non sexual activities will become sexual for him. Every chore, will be an act of service, which he will hope for a reward from her. Everything he does, will be in hopes to receive an unlock. Going out for dinner and a movie, might get him feeling hopeful, until she teases him by saying she feels like a bath and a full body massage when they get home. He knows he’ll be locked all night, in service to her.

Eventually he’ll have the same epiphany she had, he will feel his submission take over his whole body. He’ll realize he’s not in control, that he’s surrendered to her, and he has no idea what’s going to come next. He will stop trying to be unlocked through good behavior, and realize good behavior was never why he was unlocked. He gets unlocked, only through obedience to her. It’s a pivotal shift in a female led relationship, where he suddenly gets what it means to be a submissive. That’s when chastity really begins.

Enjoy articles like this?

Check out my book series Practical FLR!

Chastity
9 years ago

We need to get this clock...

cuckinlove - A Cuckold In Love
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cuckinlove - A Cuckold In Love
A Cuckold In Love

My wife and I enjoy a cuckold-hotwife relationship. Cucks and especially hotwives &amp; bulls are welcome to contact us. Meetup is possible if you live in Northern California.

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