When I Introduced My Wife To The Idea Of Locking Me Up In A Male Chastity Device, She Was Hesitant Because

What every man needs to know.  Pleasing a woman is your JOB, dude!  Take pride in it.  Get it right!

Ladies I have another question for you....

What’s one thing you wish guy did while he was going down ?

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Hotwfe Life

A guide to entering the Hotwife lifestyle

So you are now one of the millions of women who have learned she has a husband with fantasies about you having sex with other men. Welcome to our club, hopefully you’re past the shock!

Probably, you were quite unaware that a large percentage of men, your husband being one of them, even had these desires. He wants to share you with other men and women and see you enjoy sex with them!

Aren’t you lucky? Feeling excited? A little nervous too?

It’s okay, women too, just like men, want to explore sexually and have fun. How else did “50 Shades” do so well? We all belong to one of the rare species on the planet where sex is not just a reproductive instinct but an integral part of our being, it is an inseparable mix of need and desire and we cannot change that. Why would we want to?

If you are the adventurous open minded type, and you likely are, you are now contemplating doing what he fantasizes about; being able to enjoy the company of other men; their different personalities and conversations, touch, kisses, bodies, their cocks and ways of fucking which will all enhance the wonderful experience that is your marriage and your life! Trust me, I know. I am a Hotwife; a woman being free to enjoy sex with other men with her husband’s knowledge, approval and encouragement.

If you are brave and adventurous enough and you embark down this path, you will find yourself having more fun, happiness and sexual fulfilment than you ever thought. You will be feeling as confident as you did when you were first married and probably find yourself even more in love with your husband and appreciating him more than ever.

Initially, it might take time before you are completely comfortable describing your fantasies to your hubby, having sex in front of him and enjoying dates with other men without him. To begin with, it is important to go slowly and not rush things, you need to check and nurture your relationship first and foremost. Your husband’s approval and peace of mind is fundamental as most men are unaccustomed to actually sharing their wives even if they have fantasied about it. After all, it is against all that society has groomed him to be; he’ll therefore take some time to overcome his instinctive jealousy and become accustomed to watching or knowing you are being intimate with other men without him.

You must help his mind accept and be happy for you being with other men; make the thoughts as pleasurable for him as they are for you. You should regularly and casually talk sexually about men, women too if you are that way inclined, like I am. Talk about your past sexperiences, thoughts and lovers in detail whilst in bed together; never be at all reserved about this, thinking you are protecting his feelings in one way or another. Tell him in detail about your best times and your favourite men; whilst you both are being intimate have him imagine you with them as well as being with men you actually know.

Once your husband is completely comfortable and happy with this, you can gradually move on to actually dating and fucking other men. This really will become quite natural for you both and   providing he never feels neglected, he will let you do anything sexually and will get great sexual satisfaction from your encounters with other men, he will be pleased that you are happy and enjoying. You will discover it will also turn you both on like nothing you’ve ever done before and most importantly, he will be drawn to your womanly sexiness like never before and be more in love with you than at any time in your marriage as your bond strengthens further.

To find your playmates, look at men everywhere, young and old, enjoy looking at them, but don’t always go on looks. Next time you are out shopping or out and about, see if you can find one guy you fancy in some way. If you do, initiate some form of basic conversation. It may be nerve wracking, but do it, you will be happier for it and who knows where it may lead? Visit an adult dating website or a swinger’s club and start interacting with men. Be upfront about your newbie-status and that you’re only dipping your toes at this stage. Get to know some experienced Bulls, most will be more than happy to answer questions and respect your need to explore at your own pace. Try to find men you have a sexual chemistry with, it’s so important. Sexual chemistry isn’t dependent on physical attractiveness. I’ve had sex with many good looking men but felt little to no chemistry with them. The sex was good but it never left me wanting more. In fact, I didn’t care if I never saw them again. Conversely, I’ve slept with men who were more or less average in attractiveness but months later, I find myself daydreaming about them, it’s either there or it isn’t.

The Hotwife lifestyle I can assure anyone that it is a wonderful thing for you and your husband. It takes you away from the routine, like a weekend break or vacation does. You will be intimate with and share another person’s sexuality, looking at a different face and body, hearing a different voice and doing different things with your new lovers that you may not normally do. It will empower you and make you feel different about yourself in a great way. For me, I developed better emotional and physical intimacy with all men, especially my husband, enjoying sex more than ever, making me feel more confident than I ever had done previously.

A husband’s involvement can vary a lot, some Hotwives play completely on their own with no interaction with her hubby, others enjoy their man watching or participating, some do both. All variations on this lifestyle are appropriate, as all couples are unique in what they like, it is up to you. This includes how often the Hotwife dates and or fucks her new male friends. This may be weekly, monthly or just a few times a year, it’s up to you. Remember that open communication is important to establish your goals and boundaries and make this lifestyle work for you and your husband. The idea that you are sexy enough to go to another man for your sexual pleasures will drive him crazy with lust for you, trust me! Husbands of Hotwives want to be immersed into their wives’ sexual being completely as they are totally besotted by their wives; they relish the excitement of watching their partner and exploring her sexuality.

After your liaisons with other men, tell him all the intimate details whilst relaxing together, have him stroke himself and imagine you being with your lover whilst you tell him about the event. Don’t hide anything at all, if your lover made you cum with his big cock, say so, hold nothing back at all. This creates a sexually charged experience for you both on a continual basis; this is a special part of the excitement for many couples. A key point when embarking on this lifestyle is that you take control of your sexuality, it revolves around you, the Hotwife, empower yourself within the confines of your happy marriage. So, when you decide you’re going to go out and meet someone, or have someone over, just tell your husband, in a very matter of fact way whether he is to be involved or not. If you are having a man over, discuss with your husband him the things he can do to set the tone and create a special night for you both and your lover.

When your lover arrives, things then change; you are his, think about and look after his needs as well as yours. Don’t be timid and make small talk for an hour, everyone knows he’s there for a sexy time. Unashamedly show your desire for the other man, initiate intimacy and even drool over him and make compliments while your husband watches. Pay attention to your lover exactly like you would if you were totally alone with him, if you are not alone that is. Treat him like you treated your husband when you first started fucking. Let your naughty slut come out to play with plenty of dirty talk, give him all he wants and experiment a little. Don’t be shy or act inhibited, do anything you want and don’t be afraid to moan and scream and cry out with passion. Be sure to let your husband know when you orgasm with your new lover. Continue to pamper your lover exactly as you would your husband, right up until the goodnight kiss at the door. It’s always up to you, you’re the Hotwife, do what turns you on; you are in charge. The excitement of experiencing a new man sexually, while at the same time turning on the man I love, is difficult to explain but incredibly exciting.

After you have been with other men, with your hubby or without him, the next step is very important if you want to keep doing this and ensure your husband is happy supporting your Hotwife lifestyle. So, even if you’re tired, turn all your attention to your husband, become his again, letting him reclaim you as his own as soon as the other man departs. You must be right back in your husband’s arms and become his wife and lover again, making sure he receives the love and pleasure so that he very much desires to watch you do it again and again. Over the next few days, reassure him that you’re his wife forever and remind him that you love the fact that he lets you enjoy this lifestyle. Tell him how much you enjoyed the time with your lover; replay the night over and over, tell him you can’t wait to do it again and how you appreciate the freedom he gives you.

Emotional attachment with your play dates can and will happen, so be watchful that lines are not crossed. Until you’ve got a better handle on things you should only contact a guy to arrange a date for sexual play. I’ve crossed the line in the past so I’m wary of repeating mistakes, common sense prevails here. . If a guy insists on more contact in between dates because he otherwise feels ‘used’, then I recommend moving on. It doesn’t have to be all clinical either, a little contact and “closeness” between a Hotwife and her playfriends is more than appropriate and in many cases quite essential to build up some excitement before a meet. Even if I haven’t had contact with an out-of-town playmate for months, in the lead up to a date, we’ll exchange quite a few flirty and dirty text messages. There’s nothing like anticipation right? In fact, I would feel a bit weird jumping straight into bed with a guy without stoking the fire first. My husband actually likes building up some excitement and energy before a date so he thinks it’s more than fine to communicate or even see him for a drink or two first.

This lifestyle is about living life to the full, however, you will be unsure at times. What is needed is for you both to take time to acclimatise to this new sexual way of living, so, pause and reflect. Ask yourselves some pertinent questions and then continue living the lifestyle or move on from it, maybe it’s just a break that is required. You must also remember that all women have phases of feeling unsexy and it occasionally takes time and a little effort to lure the sex goddess within you out to play, this is normal. Do not give up or cancel a playdate unless really necessary, persevere and stay on course. Hotwifing in itself is very good for a woman’s self-esteem but unless you feel confident about yourself, you won’t enjoy the experience as much as you should. Pamper and treat yourself to sexy underwear or something that makes you feel good. Men are definitely turned on by happy women. Remember that you are probably your harshest critic so take it easy on yourself.

A word sometimes used to describe husbands in this alternative lifestyle, including mine, is “Stag”. This is a man who shares his woman, but without accepting being treated as a subordinate in any way by his wife and lover. Those who do enjoy this are known as Cuckolds and their activities cross over into the Sado-Masochism (S&M) lifestyle, different to what I’m talking about here. The men who entertain Hotwives (also known as Vixens) are called Bulls or perhaps more realistically, her lovers, playfriends or playdates.

Chances are you’ll be having great sex with your Stag for weeks after he watches or hears about you fucking other men, he will naturally be more attentive and loving than he was before you started being his Hotwife for real, not just in his fantasies. The lifestyle will become an important part of your sexual relationship and it will grow into the most exciting sex life you’ve ever imagined together, there is so much to experience in this lifestyle that you’ll never be bored. One life, be happy together!

reblog to save a life, i didn’t know this

My Hotwife is Working It!

In my last post, I talked about how my hotwife had ended it with her regular bull from work because he got into a serious relationship, and how she was setting the trap for a guy on her commuter bus.  Well, she worked it so the guy from work is back in play.  They will fuck next week. He backed out of his serious relationship because he wanted to keep fucking her (who can blame him?).  And it didn’t happen with the commuter guy that night....but it looks like it will happen tonight.  Our dryer went out so she arranged to take two loads of laundry over to his place to use his dryer (and seduce him to use her).  Early signs are encouraging.  So my wife may be working two regular lovers now, plus her cuckold. Wonderful times, these...

The reasons why...

WHY I CUCKOLD MY HUSBAND? BECAUSE I LIKE IT.

The politically correct answer would be: “My husband is a cuckold, because that is what he is longing for and because he wants me to lead him to a deeper submission. If he wouldn’t, I wouldn’t do it.”

The answer is correct, and forms part of the reason why I began doing it, but I have to admit, in the presend I make my husband a cuckold because I like it.

I love making love with a man, and I love that my husband does not have the right to have the same priviledges as I have. I admit. I love meeting men, the whole process from the beginning of the meeting until the conclusion. I love my husband and I keep him up to date of things, because I love his support and his deepening submission, I love it when he feels the humiliation, and because I think it’s the role of man in a marriage.

It is part of who I am, what I believe. It is not a game but a way of life, and a statement.

As I said, I love the whole process. I like to flirt, seduce, be seduced by a beautiful man. I like to be asked out on a date. I like to tease my husband about my encounters. I like it when my husband helps me prepare for a new appointment.

I like to go out. I love the game, and to test a man. I like the kiss (the first kiss!), the first caress, to be in his arms, and yes, I love sex! I like to see my husband before and after, shy, tormented, or otherwise confused. I love this power I feel, and I like what it gives me, and above all I like what it does to my husband.

And I can tell you, you do not know how it feels to really control a man until he is a cuckold, your cuckold, who knows and who is kept chaste throughout the process.

The cuckolding process is so much more then having sex. It is liberating and by allowing it my husband accepts his subservient position. It is a total power exchange of the husband submitting to the dominant female.

It is neither swinging nor wife swapping. It doesn’t happen because my husband craves for it. I would have stopped after the first try. I continued because it increases my pleasure, and because I feel like it. I enjoy every minute of it. Meanwhile, my husband exists to serve me. Everything is for my pleasure, and the frustration of my husband forms part of the pleasure.

It was my husband who brought it up, more then once. He had to convince me. Before I decided to give it a try, I told my husband that if we would do it, it might be permanent. And indeed. There is no way back.

I would raise those babies!

Never Let Him Touch His Penis

This is a rule I strictly enforce. He has adapted over time so that he can wear his chastity device at all times now so I keep it locked on him unless I play with him. I’m not as strict as some women when it comes to rationing his orgasms.

I generally only make him wait seven to fourteen days between releases. However, I am very strict in how he has that orgasm. I never give him the slightest chance to masturbate on his own.

Before his chastity device is removed, he is restrained very well. Whether I fuck him, use my hand, or just tease and deny him is purely my choice and I never tell him in advance what I am going to do to him. He is helpless and just along for the ride. It is locked back on every time before releasing him from the restraints.

The reason I do it this way every time is because I want to ensure he isn’t thinking about some random woman when he feels the pleasure, but is thinking about me personally. I want him conditioned to lust for and be obsessed with only me.

He has to look at me the whole time. He can’t close his eyes or look away from me or I will stop touching him. If he isn’t looking me directly in the eye when he orgasms, he will wait longer for release the next time.

His pleasure and orgasms belong to me as much as his body does and I enjoy the intimacy doing it this way creates. Watching the pure pleasure on his face when he ejaculates followed by the look of gratitude he feels for me afterwards makes it exciting for me.

I have promised my pet husband that I will ensure he never again has an orgasm on his own. I love the fact that he is sexually helpless without me.

Subs need love, too.

How To Control a Sub

The following is a list of things that you should be doing. Not everything will apply in every case, and there may be things not on the list that work for you.

1. You must absolutely take total control of his orgasms!

You must get him to wear a chastity device of some kind.

You should put it on him yourself and only you should hold the key.

Let him out at your discretion only and only for teasing or release.

2. Control your own feelings of guilt.

He should never be permitted to have any kind of orgasm without your permission.

If you feel he deserves an orgasm… Ruin it!

Remember, you can ruin several orgasms a day, but he can only have one full one.

Full orgasms should be for very special occasions (no more than 3 or 4 per year).

3. You must get into his head!

Learn his fantasies and what turns him on.

Tease him with your words whenever possible.

Find out what humiliates him.

Use his humiliation whenever possible.

4. You must keep him sexually aroused as much as possible.

Talk sexy to him.

Tell him you are going to make him do something humiliating.

Fondle him, or let him fondle you.

Send him text messages with orders to do something sexual.

Make him give you orgasms frequently.

5. Make him do something humiliating.

Make him wear a butt-plug for a time.

Make him be naked when you are not.

Make him masturbate for you.

Always, ALWAYS make him eat his own cum no matter where it is deposited.

6. Punish him whenever he displeases you.

Don’t let him get away with anything!

Spank, paddle, or whip him.

Humiliate him in some way.

Put Bengay or Icy-Hot on his cock, balls, or anus.

Make him do anything he hates.

7. No matter what you are doing, or where you are, find ways to tease him.

Fondle him through his pants in public (or in private).

Whisper sexy or humiliating things in his ear.

Make him shop for lingerie with you.