Loss Of Third Spaces Like Opium Dens And Brothels

I say shit like "If my memory serves me" knowing damn well it serves the dark lord

My favorite banned terms on this site are "suicide prevention" and "safe sex"

thinking of the time I ordered olive garden online and I put "please speak to me in an Italian accent" in the special requests category and completely forgot about it, and when I went to pick it up the guy comes out and goes "eyyy I got-a your-a order bappada boopity!" and when I told him he didn't actually have to do it he was like "a-nooo I was-a looking forward to it! I was-a the only one-a brave enough to do it!"

someone post john cena suit gangnam style depression

the human body is amazing u can just not sleep for 48 hours straight and all that happens is that you go crazy and are dying

*wears perfume to krav maga so it rubs off on the guy im grappling with, causing instability in his marriage*

once i figure out how to hold a conversation, it’s friendship for you bitches

This is the funniest fucking tiktok and I can't explain why