I think people need to learn that managing tasks on our own is a task in itself
"Put it in a diary" thats a task
"Use this app!" thats a task
"Make a list" thats also a task
Its why we start great with it but then stop after a while
OCD is characterized by the presence of obsessions and/or compulsions. Obsessions are recurrent and persistent thoughts, urges, or images that are experienced as intrusive and unwanted, whereas compulsions are repetitive behaviors or mental acts that an indi- vidual feels driven to perform in response to an obsession or according to rules that must be applied rigidly. Some other obsessive-compulsive and related disorders are also char- acterized by preoccupations and by repetitive behaviors or mental acts in response to the preoccupations. Other obsessive-compulsive and related disorders are characterized pri- marily by recurrent body-focused repetitive behaviors (e.g., hair pulling, skin picking) and repeated attempts to decrease or stop the behaviors.
I feel like life was very black and white as a kid. There were straightforward rules everywhere; posted signs and adults telling us to do this, don't do that, say this, respond this way in this situation. But the older i get the grayer life gets. Situations are complex and have good and bad mixed. Right and wrong is subjective. No one taught me how to live in between points on a spectrum.
What else am I supposed to like? Murder? Blood? Guns? Robbing elderly women?
I really hate hearing this comment because the people who say bullshit like that always seem to think that someone liking casual or sweet things automatically disproves that they have an "evil" PD like ASPD or NPD.
Can we all please agree that hobbies and likes/dislikes have nothing to do with a personality disorder? I love my hamster, this tiny little creature, to the point that I am obsessively watching her and overanalyse her behaviour to figure out if she likes me or not. I also had a period in which I tried to learn knitting, I love to play Final Fantasy XIV and take my time to pet any lalafell player I come across because those tiny characters are just too cute.
I know someone with NPD who obsessively collects those funky pride flags and microlabels because that makes them happy. My boyfriend has NPD and he loves warrior cats.
Not everyone who has ASPD or NPD loves gore, horror, blood, shooter games or have any other "edgy" interest (obviously people with ASPD and NPD who love those kind of things are lovely too <3). People are versatile. Stop assuming that everyone with ASPD or NPD just likes edgy things because teenagers think that this is the thing which makes them a psychopath.
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You don’t need to go into a spiral every time you have your intrusive thoughts. You don’t need to spend time feeling guilty and bad about them to be a good person.
Honestly, it got easier to ignore my intrusive thought when I reacted neutrally to them. When I’d get one and go “oh, you’re an intrusive thought”. It allowed me to roll my eyes at it and move on.
Where spending time feeling bad about them because I thought I needed to feel bad about them to still be a good person just got me stuck in them. It left the thoughts happening for longer and more intensely for me. It was also more distressing to me.
You don’t need to feel guilt for your intrusive thoughts. It’s okay to just move on and carry on with your life. They don’t define you.
I’ve experienced two bereavements in a very short period of time. My (undiagnosed) autism is making this trauma even more difficult. I feel physically ill all the time, I can’t do anything but at the same time I can’t process anything. I have barely cried and don’t even feel like this is real, or that it’s even me experiencing this. It doesn’t help that my family don’t accept me being autistic, so when I try to explain that I’m overwhelmed, anxious and experiencing sensory overload more, they just ignore that there’s even anything for me to be upset about. I just don’t know what to do.
I am really sorry you're experiencing grief so close together.
It is well known that Autistics experience grief very differently to neurotypicals. We process it far slower, experience far more inner turmoil with less ability to express it, and this can lead to a long-term burnout/shutdown relationship, where we're more sensitive to sensory input but instead of meltdowns we are trapped in our grief.
I don't know how to get your family to accept your autism, but the fact that grief is experienced differently by everyone should be enough for their compassion. It's cruel that they don't recognise that for you.