Curate, connect, and discover
ove been gone a while and it will probably be an even longer while. it turns out liking people when u have axnious attachment is REALLY bad and now i spend most of my evenings practicing piano or etching his name into a red candle and praying over it like my life depends on it i also recently discovered good weed as after my terrible experience of snooping through the freezer for my dads homemade shit during an anxiety attack scarred me. that strawberry shem hit MAD dawg omg i was metling away lolololololol maybe ill write smthn abt it. everything always turns into smthn i write bc i refuse to get hurt for nothing. all damage is good in my hands bc sometimes the assault is good and sometimes the insane urge to high is good and sometimes the abuse is good and sometimes the irrestable eye gleam that boy gives me at our concert as if he didnt js blck me is good bc i can turn it into art. and speaking of art center marimba got butt dumped on me so now im losing even more freedom from pressure in my arts and i wont even have my big brother there to help me throhg it bc hes gradiating. and big sister cam is graduating and jammy is go bue bye aghhhhhhh its all so sad yk sometimes i like purposelu let myself get hurt or i pirposelu hurt myself emotionally so i can write better. my best work comes when im sad bc i can onlu write sad things well bc how the fuck am i suppsied to write abt sunshine and rainbows and loving relationships when my ever so shitty eyesight is blacking out so everything looks dark and the only rainbows i see are when im saying i hate fags as i write poetry abt my unreauited love for this boy abd theres no loving relationshios cb the last relationship i got FUCKED but its ok bc the dmaga eis good gys i am making art from ut u already saw the shit i did back in february i write ffrom experience so my work is accurate. terribke things arent visualized in my work they are experuenced and thrown onto the page like it will be my last. ad then ppl tell mei should get hep and i should go ti the pyschward like hahaha so funny even if i wanted to i couldnt bc my parents dgaf im literally js a kid. im co28 i should be worring abt like my grades (whch i do) and like playinf valorant or whatever teen boys do. but nof this is mu life but eah my bad for being gone gangalang see yall idk when i js wanted to update my life everythign is great