I Think Every Girl Should Have A Monthly Government Allocated Check To Be Used For Buying Cute Things.

I love saying “of course” instead of “you’re welcome,” like of course I’m helping you that’s what I do, you were foolish to even consider an alternate dimension in which I’m not helping you. you idiot. you absolute buffoon.

me as a parent

if it was GUARANTEED that u would survive would u rather

A. explore a black hole

B. explore the entire ocean 

A brilliant explanation of consent for anyone who STILL doesn’t get it. 

Some of us believe in astrology without needing physical evidence. Some of us believe in paranormal activity without needing physical evidence. Some of us believe in aliens and supernatural activity without needing physical proof. So why all of a sudden when it comes to law of assumption you need concrete smack you in the face evidence to believe it’s true?

The neurodivergent urge to do this

Start giving yourself compliments! everytime you do something, just compliment yourself. You just drunk some water? "I'm actually so smart, I'm impressed". You just passed in front of the mirror and saw yourself? " omg I'm the most beautiful human I ever seen ". You just finished a task? " I'm so productive, it's amazing how well I do everything ". You are more than just worthy of this! <3

“kink belongs at pride” - tired, desiccated, queerphobic discourse

“make the golf course a public sex forest” - thriving, vibrant, moves the conversation forward

I like how “we’re just criticizing your government!!” is every freak europeans response when they’re criticized for joking about innocent people dying