You See The Person They Could Be And Not The Person They Are. That Is Why You Pour Your Heart Into Everyone

Gonna tell y’all what I can hear now that I got my hearing aids

“Not loving yourself back is also unrequited love.”

— Tablo (Blonote)

Things NOT To Do When Studying

I was going through some old papers from freshman year and I was thinking about what I was doing wrong when I didn’t achieve the grades I wanted, even though I got As in my classes. What things could I have done better to get a 100 instead of a 96? I don’t ask myself this so much as to be a perfectionist (even though I am one). I ask myself these questions because: 1) I must not have had a completely solid understanding of the material if I couldn’t get a 100 on it. 2) Maybe my less-than-stellar test-taking skills got in the way. 3) I’m a tutor, so I want to be sure I understand everything thoroughly enough to help others with the material.

I may add to this later, so you can always check out the original post here. As always, feel free to comment or message me if you want to add something to this list!

General:

Don’t simply read over your notes to study. It doesn’t work. You might pick up pieces here and there or even memorize certain things verbatim, but reading something 20 times is very inefficient. Your brain learns by making connections, so if you’re only straight reading the material you’re not making extra connections. You’re much better off going through your notes to make your own questions and quizzing yourself on them, marking down connections as you read (either in the margin or by literally connecting them in the text with a pen), or creating a study sheet (whether in text format or a mind map).

Don’t simply highlight, either. While there is a proper way to highlight, most people I see using a highlighter are doing it wrong. If you’re the person who highlights 90% of the paragraph, I’m talking about you. Okay, so highlighting is physically more active than glancing over your notes 20 times, but it’s about equally as effective if you’re highlighting everything. I recommend instead highlighting (or marking with eraseable pencil) things you want to go back to later. But, again, highlighting and reading alone is not useful. Go back to your highlighted parts to reread something that was hard to understand the first time, a topic you want to revisit to make a review sheet, etc. Whatever you use it for, make sure the purpose is to quickly find information later, not simply so you can read those things again. Try making a study sheet, in your own words, based off of your highlighting.

Don’t forget to write things down. And I don’t mean just in your planner when you have homework or papers due. This isn’t so much about getting absolutely everything down in terms of notes, either, I have a separate post regarding that. But in class you should always write down questions you have and the answer.  If you don’t get a chance to ask during class, ask ASAP whether it’s directly to your teacher or asking a classmate. If it’s that important, do some research on it, too. Also, make sure you write down information on due dates or paper topics. You probably already do that, but I would recommend having a piece of paper with you every day where you can write anything important down like dates and to-dos to organize all in one shot. If you simply write down “paper due” in a block in your planner before rushing to the next you may not see that reminder until close to the due date. I like to take all of the information on the piece of paper (which also has my day planned out and a to-do list) right when I get up in the morning so I’m prepared for the day and don’t forget anything.

What I Did Wrong:

Don’t take it easy at the start of the semester. To be perfectly honest, I’ve pretty much always done that, but my freshman year of college it wasn’t a huge deal since I pretty much already took those classes. Sophomore year, however, everything was new, so memorization and understanding didn’t come quite as easily. The harder your classes are, the more essential this is, especially if you actually want to sleep during finals week. The best thing you can do is start doing work before the semester even starts if you have a syllabus handy, or even just looking through your books to see what’s ahead. While everyone else is doing fun things the night of that first day, make sure you get some work done first before you have your fun. This sets the tone for the rest of the semester and gets you into the habit of working. Don’t let yourself get behind! It’s easier to stay ahead than it is to struggle catching up.

Don’t leave your notes to rot after class. Meaning, do something with them right after class! … or at least ASAP. Mark them up, edit them, rework them, copy or type them (if your handwriting sucks like me), or, best of all, write a short summary. Take the several pages of notes you have and condense them into one or two paragraphs. Don’t worry about the details, just make sure you’re hitting on the key points. As a bonus, you can type up some questions based off of your notes to save for later studying (details are allowed here). Everything will be fresh, making this a much easier process than if you did it right before the test. At the end of the week, make a summary of your summaries and quiz yourself on the questions you made. You’ll probably want to use those questions again, so try to reword them or even combine them into bigger questions that cover many topics. That way you’re being active with the material and will actually understand what you’re answering as opposed to parroting.

Don’t make study sheets by copying off of something else. Yes, I made this mistake. I wasn’t copying initially, but rather, using a review book as a reference to make study sheets. However, the more I was pressed for time the less I started putting things into my own words. Now, this wasn’t a big deal in terms of legality, since I kept them to myself, but it didn’t turn out to be all that helpful in the end. If you want to make study sheets, you could either take concepts you’ve been learning and put them together in different ways or make a summary in your own words. I recommend both, but whatever you do, make sure you’re actually creating something new or else you’re not going to remember it. For example, in organic chemistry I took the reactions and grouped them in different ways (by subtstrate, reactants, products, etc.) as a reference while studying. The act of sorting and looking through the reactions in order to make the sheets helped me remember them, then I had the sheets to look at while doing practice to help me memorize them further.

Don’t save the bulk of lab work for after the lab and don’t wait to write your report. By this I’m referring to the post-lab report. Spend the extra time while prepping your pre-lab materials to start your report! You’re expected to know the theory behind your labs before you perform them, so writing the introduction to your report should not be a problem. If it is, then you’ll be glad you took the time to understand the lab before you tried actually doing it. By doing this you may also find that you have questions that can be answered by the professor before you get confused in the middle of a procedure. Also make sure you have data tables prepared (not just in your notebook, but in the report file to fill in after) and anything else you’ll need to take down data. Once the lab is finished do the report immediately. Everything you did will be fresh and you’ll be glad you finished it well ahead of the deadline. At this point you can show your lab to your professor and get any corrections fixed so you’re ashooin’ for an A!

Don’t try to write a paper in one shot. I understand if you feel like your papers flow better if you do it all in one shot, but at least make sure you plan it out thoroughly ahead of time before you actually write it all out. But even then, you will likely benefit from splitting your paper into chunks to tackle one day at a time. If you have a research paper that’s double-digit pages then you’ll be forced to do that anyway, but be sure you’re splitting up the work for small papers, as well. It may not seem like a big deal to do a short paper in one day, but if you end up having other assignments or tests due around the same time it might up your stress if you’re crunched for time trying to finish that “insignificant” paper while juggling a few other assignments as well as some test prep.

Advice Suggested By Others:

Don’t listen to distracting music while studying. To some degree, the types of music that are considered “distracting” vary when it comes to the subject you’re studying and personal preference. However, the general rule of thumb is that you avoid any sort of music with lyrics if you’re studying a subject that involves language. Art, math, and certain sciences are an exception if you’re working with pictures or numbers, since language usually doesn’t interfere with those things in the brain. But if you’re reading anything, even if it’s worded directions to a math or science problem, lyrics will probably be distracting. Some people suggest that listening to new music with lyrics is okay because you won’t be tempted to sing along with something you don’t know while others get distracted by hearing any type of language. Again, it’s truly up to you, but genres such as classical, jazz, and nature sounds are usually recommended. Heck, if you’re a musician and get distracted by any type of music, silence or brown noise may be the better option for you. (Suggested by aslongasitsfiction)

Don’t study in bed. Scientific studies have shown that doing anything in your bed that isn’t sleep or sex-related affects your ability to fall asleep in your bed. When your brain primarily associates your bed with sleep, it’s much easier to fall asleep. But having trouble sleeping in your bed isn’t the only part of the problem. While studying in your bed is really comfy, you’re also more likely to fall asleep if the association with sleep is strong enough. It’s generally recommended that you don’t even study in the same room as your bed, but as college students this may not be possible if you want to use your desk. So if you don’t want to make the trek out to a more secluded study space, at least try to make sure your desk doesn’t have your bed in view. Because let’s be honest, if you’re exhausted, simply seeing your bed might be enough to make you nod off. (Suggested by rare-footage and ane-mia)

Don’t go on tumblr. Okay, this may seem obvious, but sometimes a reminder is all you need to get off your computer! I suppose it’s better that you’re looking up information to help you study, but I think we both know what the better choice would be. (Suggested by oneofakindgizibe)

Don’t study in a place you can’t focus just because your friends are there. Us humans are social animals. We like being around other people. But this can cause you problems if you’re trying to study. Unless you’re in a productive study group, make sure you separate study time and social time. You’re probably more likely to gravitate towards fun, social things over studying, so make sure studying is a priority and you get it done before seeing your friends. If you have a roommate or two, then your dorm room is probably not the right place to study. Find a few of your focus hotspots and go there for your study time. (Suggested by fitspoforever)

Don’t forget the little things you know you’ll need. This includes but is not limited to things such as chargers, books, snacks, and water. You don’t want to be in-the-zone and all of the sudden realize you need to run back to your dorm room to get a book. And then 10 minutes later realize you’re hungry and need to run to the cafeteria. If you don’t already have certain things that are always in your bag, simply keep a list of things you generally need to bring with you, leave it as a reminder on your desk, and check it over before you hit the library. (Suggested by fitspoforever)

Don’t take naps while studying without setting an alarm. Or even better, avoid naps all together. If you’re like me, 15-minute naps usually turn into 2-hour events. But regardless, if you need to get some extra sleep, get the extra sleep. It’s better to take a nap when you know you need it as opposed to falling asleep on your desk unexpectedly when you have a paper you need to get done for the next day. 15-20 minutes the recommended time for a short nap, but if you need something more robust, try for 90 minutes or use sleepyti.me to figure out the right time to wake up. (Suggested by fitspoforever)

Don’t wear uncomfortable clothes. I personally find that “dressing for success” works really well for going to lectures and virtually everything else, but terribly if you’re hitting the library for a long study session. You’ll probably wanna look cute if you’re heading somewhere public, but just make sure you’re comfortable. Yoga pants are fine for the occasion! (Suggested by fitspoforever)

gentle reminders for when you relapse

- forgive yourself, it’s not your fault

- you’re doing your best and I’m proud of you

- try to do activities that match the opposite of your emotions

- see yourself from an outside perspective, like what you would say if your friend was in your situation

- focus on your health, like keeping hydrated

- if you could heal before, you can heal again

- it doesn’t feel like it, but this is only temporary

- you’re doing well, you are loved and you are growing from this

Some pointers my Prof gave me before I began grad school

Yesterday I visited my university (undergrad) after two years in order to collect documents since I’m moving to grad school. I contacted one of my profs there and asked for advice, as I was nervous about joining research after such a long gap. Here is the advice he gave me:

General tips:

1. Be truthful to your research. Do not copy down somebody else’s work, even if you know you won’t be found out. Trust me on this, being accused of plagiarism is the worst thing to happen to a researcher and if you are exposed later on in career, your entire reputation will go down the drain.

2. Don’t hesitate to ask for help. He screwed up an instrument and waited 6 months before asking one of his subordinate who fixed it in 5 minutes. Imagine the amount of work he could have accomplished in those six months.

3. Manage your time well. Grad school is extremely demanding and some days you may not have time for sleep. Do not put off important work if you have time else you’ll end up doing it all in a hurry and without quality.

4. Every professor/guide/supervisor has her own unique method of teaching. Respect that and try to adapt. Even if you don’t understand most of what they teach, just listen. You might get a fresh perspective on things.

5. Be in touch with your teachers from undergrad etc. and ask them if you get stuck. They might help you out or at least guide you to someone who can.

6. Choose your topic wisely. Study the trends and know what are thrust areas in your field. However, the choice of guide is a major one. Make sure you understand the ways of your supervisor. Ask around, google his papers etc. and make sure he is not someone you’d hate for the entire extent of your school.

Tips related to Science research:

1. Know that there are more than one ways to solve a problem. However you cannot try them all due to time/energy/resources restrictions (or simply because your guide advises you against it). You need to know your limits and try methods that are optimized to your situation.

2. Be like Feynman. He knew his theory but he was a good experimentalist too. Have a balanced approach and know your strengths. If you are experimentalist, interact with theoreticians in order to get an idea of their approach and vice-a-versa. Your goal is to get the result and understand how you got it. 

3. You are in research not only to understand a theory/idea but also to apply it. It is not enough to know your books, you need to be able to solve the problem you are tackling. You won’t find a complete solution because nobody has solved it (thats why YOU are working on it, aren’t you?). You need to create/discover the solution.

4. Every problem in science completes a picture/theory. However not all of them receive the limelight. Find a topic you are interested in and know something about rather than chasing a “popular” one that everyone is talking about.

5. The biggest one: Do not feel inadequate for not knowing everything.

Nobody knows everything. You are in grad school to learn too. When you get stuck, get help/ask around; do not let the fear of being inferior get in the way of learning. You have got brains enough to understand things and you can.

6. Do not rely only on teachers/guides. Often your guide/supervisor will not know anything about the problem you are struggling with and will not be able to help you. In those times, find an expert (if there is) or consult books/papers. You should be able to study on your own, without somebody pushing you or deadlines.

Well, this is all I can remember. I hope it is helpful to those of you who are in a similar situation.

this is peak comedy

ALL 👏🏾 OF 👏🏾 THEM 👏🏾

Piccadilly Circus, c. 1928-1955 

The true deadly sins

Lust

Not a sin- feeling sexual attraction, sex with consenting partners, masturbation, consuming pornographic media, having several sexual partners, sex before mariage. IT’S A SIN WHEN- the person projects lust onto an unwilling recipient person and does not take into account their wants or consent. Rape, harassment, sexual assault, catcalling, dick pics.

Gluttony

Not a sin- food, enjoying food, cooking, eating sweets, eating meat. In the larger sense, accumulating material things you enjoy, like books or collectibles or whatever.  IT’S A SIN WHEN- It deprives other people of what they need.

Envy

Not a sin: Wanting things you see other people have, like money, power, fame. IT’S A SIN WHEN: This is how you define people, and stop respecting them as humans. It’s a sin when you use them for what they have and what they can bring you.

Greed

Not a sin: Wanting financial security, working hard for the things you want.  IT’S A SIN WHEN: Your own financial growth depends on keeping other people impoverished and suffering.

Pride

Not a sin: Being proud of your accomplishments, liking your looks, dressing up IT’S A SIN WHEN: It stops you from accepting your faults and seeing how you can be wrong, not admitting that you can better yourself. 

Wrath

Not a sin: Righteous anger at situations, being mistreated, seeing other people suffer, at the injustice of the world. Self-defense. Revolution.  IT’S A SIN WHEN: Violence towards defenceless people, hitting your partner or your kids,.  Violence fuelled by intolerance and bigotry. 

Sloth

Not a sin: Resting. Sleeping. Taking a day or a year off. Being unproductive. Playing videogames. IT’S A SIN WHEN: You stay inactive when action is required. When people need you and you’d rather do nothing.

I want my nervous system to calm down first,

Vincent van Gogh, from a letter to Theo van Gogh written c. May 1888 (via violentwavesofemotion)