IM GOING TO STAB MYSELF IN THE FOOT I JUST SENT MY ENGLISH TEACHER MY ESSAY ON HAMLET AND IT WAS STILL

RSD check

Your friends don't secretly hate you

You're not a bad person for things you did and said months or years ago that you now recognize as bad

You aren't cringe for being excited about things

You don't talk too much

If you feel sick from intrusive thoughts/rsd please sip on some water, get a blanket or plush to cuddle, put on some music or a video that makes you feel happy

You are loved <3

well shit I reblogged to the wrong blog again. Oh well. Have fun with my raw vulnerability

¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Dear Reader,

I'm glad that I got to experience life as a girl. I really am. It brings me to tears just thinking about it. Sure, there are drawbacks, but so many positives. I mean...

For example, it was nice to play with the other girls because they never treated me roughly. I could feel safe with them. And it's so lovely to wear dresses and skirts and cute accessories with no one thinking it's odd. It's nice to not feel so self-conscious about expressing my emotions. It's comforting to be able to connect and commiserate with others who have experienced girlhood and/or are living as a woman.

But... as I continue to see my therapist, I become more aware of how my anxiety manifests, how I often feel trapped or unseen by the world, for seemingly no reason that I can discern. The feeling of being trapped keeps returning. I'm scared of what it might mean. Maybe it's not related to my gender at all. But I'm still scared of it. And yet I hope to unravel it one day.

Today I went to shower and saw my body in the mirror, and maybe I'm just tired, but I felt so wrong. Another thing I'm not able to explain. And earlier when I spoke with my father, I hated every word that came out of my mouth, not because I thought what I was saying was dumb or irrelevant, but because suddenly, my voice didn't sound like mine.

By the way, I'm not a boy. In case you're asking that, I want to make it clear. To call myself a boy or a man just doesn't feel quite right. But I am always a person, and I don't mind calling myself a woman... sometimes.

I wish this was easy. But I have a feeling this is what the Death card that came up in a recent tarot reading (I know, I'm silly) meant for me. I interpreted it as needing to really grieve something in order to keep moving forward with my life. And I don't know, it all feels connected somehow.

Maybe this is simply part of my path to becoming a woman? I wonder.

For now I just need to cry. Like Chihiro from Spirited Away. I still remember the message I took from the ending of the film, that filled me with such sadness.

"I can never return to my childhood."

Today is my birthday! I don’t have anything exciting to post because my stylus broke but here’s this :)

So LGBTQ+ is now completely illegal in Russia. I wonder if anyone going to talk about that. I'm so tired

FREMINET ART!!! IM ASHAMED TO SAY THAT THIS IS MY FIRST TIME DRAWING HIM AS A FREMINET MAIN AND FREMELLI SHIPPER BUT HERE HE IS!!!! HOPE I NEED HIM JUSTICE

(edit: just realized its blurry..oh well)

the combination of jojo and warframe as my current interests has me feeling so autistic, in the best possible way

dear universe, can I please stop having out-of-body experiences? can i have peace?

A rite of passage for all trans women.

This should go without saying as well but, womens issues is not fully encapsulated in this comic. Its a light hearted way to talk about it, but it is infinitely more nuanced, systemic, and difficult to discuss than a 10 panel mini comic will allow.

Women are more than these problems, and these problems are not all that women face.

Also i see all these wonderful asks your all so sweet, ill be getting to them soon.