Stale-garden-hose - Az S.

Me, calling in to my shift supervisor: Gooooooood morning! Are we ready for another super splendiferous day with the public?! 😀

Her: That is too much energy

Me: It iiiiiis fake!! 😀

Her: Still too much energy

Me when hateful person

Made an autism creature for us autistics that have resting bitch faces or a tone of voice that sounds grumpy and other people often assume you’re mad. I call it the “Im Fine” creature

girl mutuals who want to kiss and eat cunt & so forth should be paid by the state to go see each other

Wait is that the actual actor of the inigo montoya guy?

i'm not really a hater so much as a disliker. occasionally the fires of hate burn within me but mostly i just encounter things and go hm. don't like that.

the resume autofill feature for job applications is. So Useful.

i think this is supposed to be homophobic but i haven’t stopped laughing at this for 30 minutes this is SO FUCKING FUNNY

my brother started calling our cat "doobie brother" which he then lengthened to "dubious brother" and has since morphed into "brother dubious" like he's some sort of fucked up little monk