I Love That John Walker Is Still A Freaky Asshole. Like He Graduated Top Of His Navy Seals Class And

Winter solider: once I tried to rob this preppy kid on his way to school but before I could even get a threat out he told me ‘please don’t hesitate’ and I was so agasp that this eight year old just asked me to kill him outright that I ran off into an alleyway and cried.

Tony: lol that was me

Bro can we talk about how Scorpius and Albus are MENACES

I'm tired of them being the shy bullied boys.

Show me the destroying there bullies with psychological WARFARE

With Albus's sneakiness and potions ability and Scorpius's knowledge and planning ... They could come up with purely DIABOLICAL plans

These are the boys who escaped the Hogwarts Express ( when THE MARAUDERS AND FRED AND GEORGE couldn't even get OFF the train) and where HALF WAY ACROSS THE COUNTRY before they even REALIZED they where gone.

These are the boys who BROKE into not only the Ministry of magic but the MISTER OF MAGICS OFFICE and STOLE a TIME TUNER

Not to mention their RICH like RICH RICH. Cost of materials is no issue PLUS Albus's uncle runs a JOKE SHOP

Throw in the Cloak and the Map and they DESTROY anyone who bothers them. They'd be THE BEST people to have on your side in a prank war.

Bringing back something I wrote seven years ago back on Reddit:

Jon Snow and Baby Switcheroo

I have an appreciation for Jon's ability to manipulate and scheme. From his first scene in AGOT he showed a gift at manoeuvring a situation into his favor, but the baby switch cements this ability the best I think.

First, its important to note that Jon doesn't rush into his lie and swap out of nowhere, he lays the groundwork and plans meticulously.

“Sire, some claim that you mean to grant lands and castles to Rattleshirt and the Magnar of Thenn.”

“Who told you that?”

*The talk was all over Castle Black*. “If you must know, I had the tale from Gilly.” - Jon I ADWD

He says something of which he'd heard rumors of, but he assigns the blame to Gilly so as to alienate Stannis further from her. By doing this, he deliberately leads Stannis into the conversation where he can mention sending Gilly off without drawing any attention or reprimand from the king who practically controls Wildling lives on the Wall.

“The wet nurse,” said Lady Melisandre. “Your Grace gave her freedom of the castle.”

“Not for running tales. She’s wanted for her teats, not for her tongue. I’ll have more milk from her, and fewer messages.”

“Castle Black needs no useless mouths,” Jon agreed. “I am sending Gilly south on the next ship out of Eastwatch.”

Jon is very good at reading people, and he uses that to his advantage by associating Gilly more and more with the things he knows Stannis dislikes and he does it covertly.

The king was confused. “I thought the wet nurse was this man Craster’s daughter?”

“Wife and daughter both, Your Grace. Craster married all his daughters. Gilly’s boy was the fruit of their union.”

“Her own father got this child on her?” Stannis sounded shocked. “We are well rid of her, then. I will not suffer such abominations here. This is not King’s Landing.”

He plays on Stannis' prejudice to achieve his goal.

Finally-

Melisandre : “Gilly is giving suck to Dalla’s son as well as her own. It seems cruel of you to part our little prince from his milk brother, my lord.”

Careful now, careful. “Mother’s milk is all they share. Gilly’s son is larger and more robust. He kicks the prince and pinches him, and shoves him from the breast. Craster was his father, a cruel man and greedy, and blood tells.” - Jon I ADWD

The above is what he says but in the next chapter this is what he thinks:

Gilly’s boy was older, Dalla’s more robust, but they were close enough in age and size so that no one who did not know them well would be able to easily tell one from the other. - JON II ADWD

He will die at sea, he thought, despairing. He is too old to survive such a voyage. Gilly's little son may die as well, he's not as large and strong as Dalla's boy. Does Jon mean to kill us all? - SAM I AFFC

Jon even swaps the physiques of the babies when describing them to Stannis in order to confuse him further and eliminate a chance of them being identified correctly. He further uses that incorrect physique to push the rhetoric of Gilly's babe being an "abomination" covertly to Stannis. Jon hammers out the details of the lie meticulously, not leaving any scope for failure by being vague. He goes all the way.

I think its an aspect of Jon's character people don't notice or credit much because it isn't at the forefront the way it is for Tyrion, but he too is capable of playing the game. I don't understand when people dismiss Jon's abilities in manipulation or write him off. He's often navigated such situations masterfully and shows himself great at reading people and what moves them from the very first book.

jon being rhaegar's visenya as in being the missing head to complete his dragon, jon recieving darksister from bloodraven at some point, jon riding rhaegal who is vhagar reincarnated, jon being visenya

they have awesome divorce sex

marvel text posts 1/?

i don’t understand the lack of harvey centric hurt/comfort fics like how do you not take this man with walls around his heart as high and sturdy as the ivy tower he has made a home for himself in so no one could hurt him anymore and also so he could protect the ones he loves — because he loves and he cares so deeply and so violently, he doesn’t know what to do with it and neither do his people because they’re so ready to believe the mask they can’t even see anymore because he’s so high up and untouchable. how do you not take this man with his fragile walls that are so ready to be torn down, this man who is so scared of being alone, this man who yells that people don’t leave him — and this man who, when they do, stands frozen to the spot because his world is so frail it might as well be made of glass. and glass is useful to watch those you love but it breaks so easily — and it’s a good thing you can still watch your people through broken glass but up here the winds are cold and relentless and your people won’t hear you when you ask for help.

how do you not take harvey specter, the cockiest son of a bitch in new york city who has it all because he worked for it, who came from nothing and worked his way up, whom people are so ready and willing to beat and betray because they see his name as a trophy without knowing that he cares so deeply that it’s his heart on the line more than his name. how do you not take harvey fucking specter and make him wonder if any of this is even worth it. how do you not take this man and inflict pain and betrayal upon his fragile little heart — fragile, because he had to fend for himself from such a young age, he doesn’t know how to ask for help anymore.

how do you not inflict pain upon him because he can take it and he will take it and he takes it and he takes it — until he can’t anymore; but even then he will, because he is harvey specter, and the world knows. he can take it. and he has to.

me every time i get to a jon chapter

went into the theaters for a casual watch and came out wanting to see john walker take it up the ass (specifically from bob)