Mr Sandman Was Playing In This Gas Station And The Cashier And I Both Sang “man Me A Sand” At The

*wakes up during ball removal* hey doc- can you put those in a jar for me?

BCBS: Yeah if your surgery takes longer than our admin staff with no medical training thinks it should, you have to pay out of pocket for the anesthesia.

UHC CEO: [assassinated in the street]

BCBS: ... You know we were just joking about that anesthesia thing ha ha we would never. We love keeping our brains inside customers happy.

there isn't much to draw about fat fish tail

Seek, seek, lest.

Ow oof ouch ow

elf yuri except one of them is high fantasy and the other is one of santa's

Kinda wanna be a girl but I'm 6'4" and built like a linebacker. So ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

You can be a girl you can always be a girl there’s no kind of body that unable to be a girl you need to become a girl

Estradiol grenade

You'd be crying either way.

got turned down for the job at the onion. turns out they write satire or something and don't need a guy to peel all the onions. crying my eyes out.

Reading a Terry Pratchett book is literally just: Here's a funny little joke Here's something that you can tell is a joke but don't get and will only figure out five years later Here's a surprisingly cool fantasy concept Here's a unique and well written simile Here's a lil guy Here's something that has aged depressingly well into the modern day Here's something that has aged remarkably queer into the modern day Here's a character that you can barely understand what he's saying Here is the most terrifying and deeply disturbing concept you have ever heard, casually mentioned Here is the dumbest fucking pun you've ever heard but in the best way Here is a quote so profound that it makes you view morality and the world in a different way Here is a plot twist that you can't tell if it's genius or stupid Congratulations! You've finished the book! It has fundamentally changed you as a person and you will never be the same!

yearning is such a beautiful thing. what i love about yearning and slowburn is that while the romance progresses, you can get to know the characters better, which makes the audience see how deep the bond in the relationship is. all the small moments have meaning. every interaction, every thought, and every glance means something and is a way to emphasize how much love (platonic or romantic) the characters have for one another. there is something so beautiful about yearning because it's so human to want something so badly, but you have a part of you that is afraid you'll never get it. romantic or not, i love watching/reading characters find their person and learning all about each other, becoming so close and connected that it's hard to imagine life without the other. yearning to know more, yearning to be closer. it's so beautiful to me!