The Things I’m Gonna Do To Your Mouth…

Everyone keeps talking about "the writer's barely disguised fetish". But I still haven't heard about "the writer's barely disguised huge ass pet peeve"

I played in the pit of one little silly horror shop musical and now the whole course of my life has changed forever :)

how it feels to stop tossing and turning and get up to piss

david tennant's acting choices in utopia haunt me

I actually do feel like the "unemployed friend on a Tuesday" meme actually helps de-stigmatize unemployment because it frequently affirms that when you don't have a job you're more likely to be getting up to some weird shit rather than just lazing around. But I also feel like the unemployed friend is frequently up to some random shit because there's a whole pile of miscellaneous life tasks that full-time employment keeps people from. The unemployed friend is helping their cousin move, or babysitting, or checking in with a neighbor with mobility issues. The unemployed friend is a walking thesis on the inflexibility of our current labor landscape and just how much work exists outside of work.

There is always time for dental hygiene, Seymour!

THE S IN DDS STANDS FOR SERVE ✨

Teeth are bullshit. What do you mean you’re decaying. Get a fucking grip. You’re a bone now act like it. You don’t see my finger bones decaying from jerking it too much now do you

Steve Martin in the mid-‘60s