Nova-rose-greene - Nova Rose

Create

Art has definitely been a therapy for me. Whenever no one is there, or no one understands, throw it down in your art. Get it out. Sing, dance, paint, write. Do whatever you gotta do to let it out. Every frustration, tear, and smile. Create work that will uplift you. Create work that only you can understand , something that only you can enjoy in the specialist of ways; As a creator.

I love you, and I can’t wait to see what you create

There are 7 billion people on the planet and not one of them thought they should reach out for me

My life’s mission is to ensure that dreams of others around me are fulfilled.

I want to help as many people as I can

I want to love so hard because I don’t want anyone to feel as unspported as I do.

They say what goes around comes around

Treat others the way you want to be treated

Love thy neighbor as they self

Lead by Example

I’ve strived to be the best friend , neighbor, partner, person that a person could exist next to

I’ve crafted scenarios for people to gather and be happy around me

But have failed to have people want to gather with me

I’ve failed at being invited

I’ve failed myself

I’ve stayed in relationships way longer then I needed to

Or wanted to

Because I didn’t want to be alone

I stayed with an abusive man and tried to make myself what he wanted just so I could be the girl who he wanted to love.

I just wanted some to think I was deserving of love

I’ve crafted parties to invite people over in hopes that theyd like me.

They enjoyed themselves and then continued to ignore me day after day.

My parties came and went and no one but me remembered what we did

No one but me cared

No one but me ever remembered my birthdays

When I’m sad I send a text looking for a conversation

But It’s hard for people to hold on to them with me

Or it seems like it’s hard for others to check on me before months have flown by

Yes, I’m the friend who always calls first.

My own grandparents don’t even call to check on me

Ive exhausted myself reaching out to others being the only one to maintain relationships.

Ive said I’m only gonna interact with people who care to interact with me

And then I grow even darker when the truth settles in and it’s just me and Jesus sitting in a room staring at each other.

JC is great don’t get me wrong

He’s the only reason I even know what love is

He’s the reason I keep giving day after day

Sometimes I think I’ll get real friends when I’m older

I’ll have built my empire up and then when I’m exactly where I’m suppose to be at the exact moment I’m suppose to be there, I’ll look around at all the like minded people I’ve loved and who have loved me sitting around a table and I’ll be grateful.

Greatful that there were real friends for me I just had to be patient to find them.

But it’s sad to think that that day isn’t today and the chances of it being tomorrow aren’t any brighter

Maybe next week

Maybe next year

Maybe when I move states, Change my name, shave my head and morph into the Person who people want to be friends with.

Real friends.

Friends who think of you and just send you a message.

A gif

A tag in an article.

A friend who just lets you know they love you.

Until then I’ll keep trying to be that friend.

I’ll keep putting that energy and that love out there

And I’ll do my best to graciously wait for it to return.

Guess at this rate, many people are going to move out of the US

Even Jesus saw the twelve shrink

Team by Magic & Bird

I’m starting to find myself thinking about what I’m suppose to do versus what I want to do.

If the spirit says move then I move

And sometimes I stop and think ... wait

Why did I do that let me go back

But now I’m coming to a point where I don’t question it

I just go

I may think upon what just happened

But no longer am I trying to make myself comfortable

Change is uncomfortable

Change is different

But if you wanted to be comfortable you didn’t want to change

If you wanted to different then you don’t want to be comfortable

Comfort will come in the end

As your reward for the success for all your hard work

But the end is not now

The end is near

So we gotta get all the work in that was assigned before dad comes home

I was suppose to take the chicken out the freezer 2 hours ago and now he’s down the street

Don’t wait.

Do what’s asked when it’s asked

Your only wasting time

Be obedient

And see the fruits you bare

TBT 💙 @leauwkey