A Fun Little Headcannon Is That Everyone Believes Jason To Prefer Paperback And Physical Paper But He

We should talk more about shoes that Batfam wear with their suits. Like, surely, they have some special shoes that are made specifically for the vigilante activies, but imagine them forgetting to switch it on different occasions?

Bruce, hurrying in a place of crime after running away from gala, so goons die of laughter seeing Batman in rich-ass, patent leather shoes, and keep making fun of him.

Dick gets an emergency call in the middle of his salsa dancing classes, and everyone witnesses Nightwing's perfect acrobatic skills followed by a clicking of his boots.

Jason intentionally comes to the shootout in his cowboy boots. Was he inspired by Dante from Devil May Cry? Was it Roy's idea? Who fucking knows. But he keeps making awful puns the whole time.

Tim absolutely knowingly keeps putting on his favourite converses, because he doesn't give a fuck and other shoes make his feet hurt. Also, he looks cool, and teenagers adore Red Robin for that alone.

Cass fights in her ballet flats once. It should be funny, but the sight of her, kicking everyone's asses while acting like she is in the middle of the ballet practice, makes everyone shiver for another few weeks.

Stephanie buys herself those kinds of shoes that light up in neon when you step on the ground harshly. She decides she doesn't want to wear anything else in her whole life and gets excited when she they light up with violet, matching her suit.

Damian once woke up by his father in the middle of the night during some important case. He is so sleepy that he leaves for the patrol in his plushie, cow-themed slippers. Others are too sleep-deprived to notice.

Duke has the worst week in his life thanks to goons and finals. He is so frustrated that he just... throws his flip-flops straight in the criminal's head. The video made by some random civilian circulates in the internet non-stop.

coming out of my cage and i been doing just bad. going back in my cage because i like my cage

Damn girl, go for the jugular

Inspo here

Headcanon that when extremely sleep deprived Dick tells Jason wayyy too much traumatizing lore about his life.

Bc he kinda forgets that Jay wasn’t there for it

Since he was hallucinating the bastard (yeah I know in canon it was obviously a hallucination idk)

So Dick will accidentally just lore dump about the most insane shit bc well Jason was there (no he wasn’t)

And when he’s offensively sleep deprived it goes the other direction and he forgets that Jason ever came back.

So he’s just in the corner watching what he believes to be a hallucination of his baby brother except for some reason his mind decided he needed to see what Jay would look like grown up.

Dick on day 7 without sleep watching Jason beat up a gang member: maybe my therapist was right

Jason: the fuck are you-?

Dick: Maybe I DO need to go back on anti-psychotics

————————————————————

Dick alone in his apartment with a bag of shredded cheese and a plain cereal box in one hand ready to have what is probably the Most depressing depression meal: hmmm hmmmm hmmm

Jason who climbed through a window while dick was distracted: Sup

Dick: ah look a wild hallucinajason appears

Jason: what the fuck did you the call me

Dick patting Jason’s cheek: oh they’re somatosensory now too! That’s new! Anyway bye bye baby bird

Jason watching his brother leave the kitchen: ….okay what the fuck?

——————————————

Dick only on 3 days without sleep: this reminds of the time I was about the sign my marriage license!

Jason: two things 1) why does a shootout remind you of being at the courthouse 2) WHEN THE FUCK DID YOU GET MARRIED

Dick: I didn’t get married?

Jason: then what the hell are you talking about

Dick: idk the last time I tried too get married way more guns than necessary were involved and you know when I tired to get married Jay you were there!

Jason “was dead at the time” Todd: what the fuck are you talking about?

Dick: yeah! I mean you really hated her so you told me I’d be a disappointment if I married her and then disappeared. Which like granted I also didn’t wanna marry her but that was harsh

Jason: ….. I? I don’t even know what the appropriate response is? Here

Dick: an apology would be nice?

Jason who is now 50% sure his ghost haunted his brother 25% sure his brother was hallucinating and like 25% sure Bruce used his image as a tool to get dick to do what he wanted: ……. You know what… nah she was a bitch and I’m glad you didn’t marry her

Dick: I mean.. same

—————————————

Dick has a caffeine IV Grayson : this brings me back to the good old days

Jason dodging an alien: ??? When you were Robin ? How?

Dick: no! When Donna died and I didn’t have to worry about saying alive so I could do insane shit like infiltrating an alien spaceship with no protective gear

Jason:??????????????? Dick what the fuck

Dick: OH come on??? You were there! Very quippy 10/10 would be haunted by again

Jason:…. I- yeah you know what I’m not touching this one



let’s not talk about this, ever

Birdflash I did before bed

Thinking about another funny DeadTired AU idea.

Deaged Dani and Dan btw.

So does anyone remember that one video of a guy doing a interview and his kids come in the room.

Imagine secretly married DeadTired. Tim is out of Gotham at the moment but in a video call with the Bats or maybe during a WE meeting (Bruce is in the call as well) when out of nowhere the door behind him opens and a Deaged Dani (Ellie), who comes in with a smile and walks in like she owns the place and not long after her in a baby walker Dante (Dan) comes in too, Tim is trying to keep a straight face but inside is panicking when he realizes he didn't lock his office door (which is coated with anti-ecto paint that only work when its locked and it keeps the kids out) knows there is no way to keep them a secret anymore.

Then Danny comes sliding in, grabs the kids, whisper/shouts a "Sorry Tim!" and gets them out.

Tim is silent for a moment, takes a breath and tries to resume the talk.

Red Robin!Tim: Can’t stop shaking.

Red Hood!Jason: Probably Parkinson’s.

Tim: Not helping.

Jason: Wasn’t trying to.

[Freeze frame]

Narrator: The shaking was in fact caused by the 15 red bulls Tim had decided to consume before patrol. He promptly proceeded to declare he “had a meeting with the lord” before steeling Red Hoods motorbike and high tailing it outa there. He was found on a random farm in North Carolina the next day with no recollection of what happened.

batman villains are funny bc they all end up in arkham over and over so its just like

killer croc, painting a beautiful and sensitive portrait representing his inner turmoil: i had no idea (insert plant) was an invasive species in gotham

poison ivy, painting a photorealistic fern: they are! they’re so widespread that its almost impossible to contain, and it really hurts my heart

joker trying so fucking hard not to call them homophobic slurs because the therapist told him he’d get extra joker mush if he behaved for once in his fucking life: