HOW TO WRITE A SLOW BURN ROMANCE

//@writerthreads on Instagram

(Because these things get me slapping my pillow at 3 AM)

Slow burns are romance stories with a slower pace. They’re more realistic, because you need to build the relationship between the two people. This can either be a subplot or the main plot, and usually takes place through the whole book because time is a big factor in slow burn.

You’re showing the reader how their relationship changes from a friendship to a romantic couple, therefore you need to show the chemistry between the two people. Build the relationship stage by stage. Plan down “breakthroughs” that acsends them up the relationship ladder. Think of scenarios and reasons for them to become more close. (Ex. mutual friends, common interests) Reference real romantic relationships that you might’ve experienced for help!

Like any other relationship, consider how they met in the first place. With the method of “show, not tell”, show their initial, intermediate, and final feelings (at the end of the book) through actions or thoughts, instead of making them say it out loud all the time. If you need help with affectionate actions, scroll down on our feed!

If they’re already friends, you’re a step ahead— you don’t have to deal with formalities in introductions and such, but still, you might want to talk about initial feelings. A first person POV is much more intimate than a third person POV, which can be more casual, so it depends on what tone you want to build with the story.

Also, like any other plot, they’ll encounter difficulties. It doesn’t necessarily have to be a life-or-death scenario, but think about what makes it slow burn, what’s preventing from from making it official. A common problem is because both parties are afraid to make the first move either due to embarrassment, or inexperience. They might be scared to be rejected because they’re not sure whether or not the other person is causually flirting with them, or because the feelings are actually reciprocated. You’ll then have to find a solution to it.

Show the reader how they become more comfortable around each other and how they enjoy the other’s company. Simple ways could be long, easy conversations between them, or simply showing how they’re happy when they’re with the other person. Romantic feelings don’t just occur in two days, people don’t (usually) go saying “I love you” in a week.

In a way, you’re teasing readers with the question “will they, or will they not?”. They’ll be on the edge of their seats, waiting for the moment they finally become official. Therefore, even though slow burns are paced, you don’t want to make them too slow. Not baby steps, toddler steps. Throughout the story, you’re giving out romantic hints. If you want to speed things up, include more obvious ones where character go, “oh my god, they definitely like you!”, and if you want to slow them down, include less subtle ones, and create a small distance between the two people.

In the “talking” stage, there’ll be loads of flirting. This is basically the honeymoon phase. Other characters are going to tease them about it, but the two people will still be unsure. They’ll be texting on phones or sending letters, or talking loads in person. If you’re writing in first person, describe the character’s current feelings. If you’ve got bold characters, use pickup lines, with or without humourous intention. It’s all up to you, and as I always say, do what’s best for your story and the way you want it to go.

As an author writing a slow burn romance, you’d likely want readers to like the couple, and here’s the main way:

- show that they’re “perfect” for each other...

At least for the time being. You’re writing about the present, not the future (that’s for the end of the book where you decide whether or not they end up together). Make them “couple goals”, even though they’re not official yet, where their love is being shown, but not said (yet). This could be through heart-to-heart conversations where they deeply understand each other, or as simple as waiting for each other while the other person is tying their shoelace. All in all, make them happy together. Show that they’re happy with each other— big smiles, laughing at each other’s jokes because they have the same humour, etc.

I’m conflicted about whether or not on-and-off relationships are considered to be slow burn. If the process of it is rapid, I personally think it isn’t, but if it’s a series and there’s a long gap between each breakup and you properly build on it, it could be a slow burn.

Just remember, it’s like any other romantic relationship, except it’s being dragged out. Don’t forget about supporting/ other characters and the subplot/ main plot. You’re still writing a story, and all those aspects make your story ten times more interesting!

How to Set a Creative Goal

I'm going to be blunt here: a lot of creative people tend self-sabotage by giving themselves goals that are (1) not healthy and (2) completely unrealistic. I know because that used to be me.

I like to lead by example, so I'm going to give you my easiest, quickest, most successful guide for how to set your goal; regardless of whether you want to write a novel, edit said novel, pick up drawing, or learn an instrument.

1 - A Matter of Time

Ask yourself the following question:

"What is the least amount of time I can spend on this project every day?"

You read that right. Not "the most time" or "what you can spend on average." We're talking LEAST here. What is the least amount of time you can spend every day? Two hours? One hour? Twenty minutes? That's good, and that's enough.

Take it from someone who's been doing this for a while, who's made all the mistakes, and who's had to learn and re-learn this:

Consistency is Power.

The person who consistently works on their passions, every day, will not only grow faster, and finish more things, but also just be happier.

I know our human brain hates to wait; we want things to be ready yesterday, we want to see growth in a matter of minutes, but this is just not how life works. Being impatient only leads to burn out, take it from me. I learned that the (very) hard way.

So, again, ask yourself the question above and consider the LEAST amount of time you can spend on your craft every day.

Got it? Good. This is your goal. Now comes the hard part.

2 - The Making of a Habit

You may think that working on something only 50 minutes a day is not enough to actually get better, but that's actually how I practiced drawing. And you've all seen how far I've come. That's consistency, baby—but that isn't the only benefit of doing something every day!

The more you teach your brain to do something the less friction there is whenever you want to do said thing. It's just science. Writing can seem daunting, scary even, but the only way to change that is by consistently facing the blank page.

It gets easier. It'll never be automatic, you're never going to write a book in one sitting, but it is going to get less hard. Less harrowing. Some days you'll sit down and your allotted time will fly by.

It's wonderful.

That being said, the target is to work on your project everyday—because that'll help you make it into a habit faster—but don't stress out if you miss a day. Life happens. Whatever you do, try to miss as few days as possible. Keep a calendar, post about it on social media, tell people that you're challenging yourself. They'll take you more seriously.

3 - Appreciate Life

Your creative projects shouldn't impede your life, they should be a part of your life. That is why we practice them daily, and we spend a healthy amount of time on them. If 2020 taught me anything, it is that you have to take care of yourself. We are a system, a machine with many components, and when you don't take care of one the whole suffers.

That's why it bears repeating.

The best creative goal is one that you can achieve consistently with ease, every day, so that it can function as a part of your life.

That's the trick right there. I can tell you from experience that I used to think my writing, and my art, where separate to the act of living. I did those things, and then I did the living. And I shouldn't have to tell you, but that was such a mistake.

Spending a little bit of time on your passions every day is good enough.

And if you think it's not, remember that I don't give advice I don't follow myself. So far this year I've written AND edited two novels. All without burning myself, without rushing, and while taking the time to appreciate life.

Take that for what it's worth. 🐰🌻

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justanothergirlsblog

4 years ago

“On earth there is no heaven, but there are pieces of it.”

— Jules Renard

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justanothergirlsblog

4 years ago

“Everything was screaming: the sea, the wind, my heart.”

— Yann Martel

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justanothergirlsblog

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Writing Tip #218

Tightening your sentences and getting rid of unnecessary adverbs and adjectives does not mean writing short sentences. You can have a long sentence without any adverbs or adjectives and you can have a short sentence with too many. Tightening your sentences just means that every word has to matter.

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justanothergirlsblog

4 years ago

“Eye contact is a dangerous, dangerous thing. But lovely. God, so lovely.”

— Hedonist Poet

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