Okay So Apparently Kids These Days Don't Know How To Be Safe Online Because Their Parents Are Fucking

I'm sick of hearing the phrase "start a family" when they really mean "have kids". because YOU DON'T NEED CHILDREN TO BE A FAMILY. SAY. IT. WITH. ME.

a married couple can be a family.

an unmarried couple can be a family.

a friend group can be a family.

someone and their pet can be a family.

any family formation is valid, and it's the individual's choice whether to have children, or even get into a relationship.

stop making people feel inadequate for never having kids. it's better to be unsure and not have any, than be tied into an unwanted familial relationship just because society claims it's necessary for feeling sufficient.

Harris will be president and America will be better than it ever was.

Never Forget

Feedback ruins everything.

Social media has ruined everything for me. Even movies! So much so that I will never read or watch reviews ever again.

Update: I'm taking a hiatus from posting indefinitely.

Internet people are not trustworthy anymore!

The Satire for Unrealistic Expectations and Unrealistic Thinking (or the Marketplace of Negativity) (TUMBLR Edition)

DISCLAIMER:

The following fanfic is a satire making fun of toxic rage bait YouTube channels and toxic DeviantArt accounts that cover cartoons, movies and TV shows as well as showing my defense for any movie Disney has made lately, whether it be a original animated film or a live action remake. This is not meant to attack anyone or be taken seriously at all, with the exception of the message that it's sending. This is also inspired by gamerjerk450's DeviantArt fic, Satire IV: Two-Dimensional Thinking with a few differences. Any constructive criticism is allowed. No copyright infringement intended at all.

And no flames, blind hatred or spam allowed! Thanks and let's begin.

It was the year 2025, specifically March 19,. it would be almost 2 days before the worldwide release of Disney's live-action remake of Snow White. Lots of kids and adults all over the world were nervous and excited about the film's release. And everyone at Disney as well as the cast and crew are proud of what they had done. Despite some fears, here and there, they were still sure, that the movie would be a smash hit at the box office, outgrossing its large budget and being praised for being a new Snow White for a new generation.

However, many miles away from Disney's headquarters stood an old condemned building. inside it consisted of just countless people, chatting and having conversations, like normal people. Around them were tables full of cake, ice cream, cookies, tea, alcohol and all kinds of sweet treats, with soda and juice on the side and a sign that read, "Mad Tea Party", right next to them.

Their discussions were soon interrupted with the blow of a dog whistle. This was done by the group's leader, who wore a T-shirt that said Make Disney Great Again on it, who came in with a henchman who wore a black shirt with nothing on it and a hench-woman with badly dyed red hair with a shirt that said, Go Woke Go Broke on it.

The man leading the Anti-Disney Club then proceeded to speak into a megaphone.

Speaker: Excuse me, everyone, may i have your attention, please? Good. Now, thank you all for coming here today. My name is Nick Sorenson, but you can call me by my online alias ToonEGuy. With me, i have MechaRandom42 and Will Jordan the Critical Drinker.

MechaRandom: It's a honor to be here.

Drinker: Does anyone know why you're here today?

Rando: Yeah, to save Disney and the animation and film industries from themselves!

Everyone: Yeah!

Nick: Excelent! This saves us time for explaining all of it. I've brought some refreshments to pass the time and stuff. So, here's the plan: we strike at 6 PM. sharp, march right to Disney's HQ, and protest our hearts out until all the old greedy bastards and woke employees cave in. Any questions?

Random #2: Yeah, it's close to 4 PM, right now. What should we do until then?

Nick: Good question. Before we strike, we'll pass the time by watching the last good Disney movie, Winnie the Pooh from 2011, from before those lying bastards played with our emotions by promising to make a new hand-drawn movie every 2 years, but it all just a lie to try and kill of traditional animation in favor of soulless overrated CGI movies, woke Marvel, woke Star Wars and soulless woke live-action remakes! But enough of that, let's watch.

So the Anti-Disney Club and all the internet trolls, Cartoonaboos, purists and nostalgiatards spent the next 70+ minutes watching the 2011 Winnie the Pooh movie.

Once it was over, they had all begun preparing for their protest march. Soon, they were ready to set out holding up various signs that read stuff like, "End Wokeness", "Restore Walt's Dignity", "2D is Best D", "Animation is for Everyone", "No Live Action", "Enough with the Remakes", "Go Woke, Go Broke", and other phrases.

MechaRandom: Alright, this is it, guys!

Critical Drinker: This is the day we take back what's rightfully ours!

Nick: Yeah, and this is the day we show those hacks at Disney that they messed with the wrong crowd! Today, they will know the name Anti-Disney Club! This will be the biggest day of our lives! Who's with us?

Everyone: Yeah!

Nick: That's exactly what I wanted to hear! Now, let's fight!

However, as they started marching, they overheard something that ground their gears.

Little girl (singing): Let it go, let it go, can't hold it back anymore, let it go, let it go.

Nick (into megaphone): Hey, stop singing that song, you little brat! You should be ashamed of yourself! You're part of the problem!

The girl ran off crying to her mom and told her to call the police.

Over at Disney HQ, everyone was having an office party, to celebrate the upcoming release of Snow White 2025. A bunch of executives, animators, live action crew members and the cast were discussing amongst themselves. However, the conversations were soon interrupted when one executive spotted something bad in the distance.

Executive: Come here, everyone. I think, I we've got an emergency.

Everyone did as told.

Executive #2: What is the problem?

Yep, there was a problem. It was a burning Mickey Mouse ear-hat. Then they heard so many faint shouting, and they could just barely make out the words, "DOWN WITH DISNEY!", from the screams. Some of them even got X notifications on their phones.

Rachel Zegler: "Cancel the Snow White remake"? "End wokeness"? "Restore traditional animation"? Oh god, not those people again!

Executive: What do you mean?

Rachel Zegler: They harassed, threatened and slandered us over these remakes for too long.

Executive #2: We got to alert Mr. Iger about this.

They all made their way to Disney CEO Bob Iger's office.

Executive #2: Mr. Iger, we got a problem!

Bob: What is it?

Executive: There's some toxic protesters out there who want us to cancel the Snow White remake and other remakes and sequels.

Rachel Zegler: And they are led by those who lied about me and Hallie Bailey and others.

Bob: Don't worry, I'll just force the guards on them, right now!

Iger then pressed a large red button that said, "IN CASE OF PROTESTERS AND BOYCOTTERS" on it, and before they knew it, the Anti-Disney Club were hounded by security guards who proceeded to drag them off the premises and, for some of the pestiest protesters and/or boycotters, pepper sprayed them. However, a select few, including Nick, Drinker and MechaRandom managed to avoid them somehow and made their way into the building.

Soon, they reached the main office, where the party took place. Everyone stared at them in discomfort.

Nick: Hacks! All of you! You're all hacks! What do you think, you're doing!?

Executive #3: We're trying to run a business.

Nick: Liar! You're trying to ruin animation! You want to burn this industry to the (BLEEP)ing ground!

Drinker: Yeah, and you won't stop until all animation is CGI and soulless photorealsitic live action remakes!

MechaRandom: You and Pixar even ruined each other. You're even hating men!

Executive #4: Who the hell do you people think you are, just storming in here and insulting us and hating us!

Nick: I'm Nick Sorenson of the Anti-Disney Club! And we are here to save the industry from itself!

Rachel Zegler: How, by bullying people like me for doing my job!?

Bob Iger stood in to defend his company and everyone in t.

Nick: You! You are turning Disney into soulless corporate filth! You don't care about quality, all you want is money!

Bob: That's NOT true! We're just making the movies we want to make, in the ways we want to make them!

Nick: You are ruining our childhoods, Slob Iger! You've even ruined the company and tarnished it's vey name, especilaly with it's inclusitivity agenda! What do you think Walt Disney would say about this?

Then a lightning strike hits the ground and out of it comes a faceless ghost, shaped like Walt Disney himself.

Walt's ghost: I am the ghost of Walt Disney and I'd say that you all need to calm down and retreat immediately!

Drinker: What? Is this some kind of prank?

MechaRandom: Shut up!

Nick: Yes, Walt Disney. Please tell everyone what you think of what they are doing to your company!

Walt's ghost: To be honest, I think, they are all doing an expectionaly good job, keeping my company alive and current.

MechaRandom: Screw you, guys! I'm out!

MechaRandom leaves to surrender herself to the police.

Drinker: I'm late for dinner!

Drinker also leaves.

Nick then goes mad.

Nick: What!? That's ludicrous! They're ruining your company! How can you just be okay with this?!

Walt's ghost: As long as our primary goal remains, "to bring fun, magic and enjoyment to people's lives", the methods to do so whether it be original or a remake are irrelevant.

Nick: That's not their goal! They just want to make money and brainwash the masses into thinking their trash is good! Nobody wants this (BLEEP)!

Walt's ghost: Correction! YOU are among the vocal minority of people online who doesn't want this (BLEEP). And that type of person is a toxic anti-fan and a blind hater!

Nick: What do you mean!?

Walt's ghost: Have you ever thought that what modern audiences, or rather people in the real world want is different from what you want? People don't watch our movies, because we brainwash them, they watch our movies, because they love them. Because they bring smiles to their faces. It's secretly the same with live-action remakes, too, you just don't know it, yet.

Nick: No, that's wrong! I just know it! CGI animated movies and live-action remakes are inferior and completely soulless!

Walt's ghost: CGI is capable of more than hand-drawn animation, is more eye-catching and is less of a struggle to animate as well. Live action is also easy, because you have everything in front of you and go beyond imagination better. They are the best uses of the latest and greatest technology ever created. Plus today's movies have become more inclusive for the better, letting anyone of any cultural background in the whole world see themselves in every character depicted. To not make use of CGI technology or diversity and inclusion would be like filming a modern day movie using a camera from the 1900s. And to just do original stuff 100 percent and not have live-action remakes or sequels, the world be a boring place to live in.

Nick: Well, everything from my childhood in the 90s was more original and less corporate!

Walt's ghost: You mean, the decade when other studios tried and failed to be more like us? The decade that had even more corporate stuff like A Troll in Central Park? Face it, man! You're NOT trying to "save the industry", you just want to "save the industry for yourself", because you refuse to move on from the past and realize that filmmaking and technologies for live action and animation have evolved phenomonally today and is making it easier for anyone to get into the film industry. You refuse to agknowledge that these movies (whether they be originals, sequels, or remakes) aren't just moneymakers, but they're also beloved modern classics for anyone of all generations to enjoy. We'll still have the original versions of these stories available, but we'll tell them in a new way that builds on their foundation. To cancel the live action remake of Snow White and boycott it would mean to not only put the time, effort and money spent making it in vain, but also to disappoint anyone who really does want to see it. And at the end of the day, would that be ruining the industry?

Nick: But you're killing off traditional animation and making everything woke!

Walt's ghost: You know, I'm not even gonna respond to that, you're a madman! This isn't the past anymore! We're not in the 1930s-1990s anymore! And it's not even the COVID era anymore! You have to keep moving forward and adapt to modern times, like my company does!

Nick: Well, I think, you're a fake! The real Walt Disney would never say that and he would be rolling in his grave! Come on, ADC, let's show these assholes what we're made of! Down with Disney! Down with Disney! Down with Disney! Down with...

Nick then realized that his members were silent and planning to quit.

Nick: What re you guys doing, protest with me!

ADC Member #1: Actually, he's right, Nick. Doing this would hold the industry back.

ADC Member #2: Yeah, these protests and boycotts are all dumb and pointless! You and all those other haters are the ones brainwashing us!

Soon, they all tossed their signs to the floor to burn and gave on protesting and boycotting Disney.

Nick's fury (haha) was growing.

Nick: I'll get you, you impostor!

Just as Nick was about to charge, Walt used his ghostly powers to strike him with lighting, making him still and powerless.

Rachel Zegler: Thank you! Now, let's take this toxic hater to the cops and court!

Bob: Agreed! Nick, you and the other haters who have not come to their senses will be placed under arrest for breaking and entering and attempting boycotts. As for those who are not protesting anymore, you will still be fined, for all this.

ADC Member: But we're already are guilty and we're very sorry.

Bob: All is forgiven. We're still going to testify in court, next week.

One Week Later. The Supreme Court makes a verdict against those who attempted to boycott recent Disney movies.

Judge: All rise.

Everyone in the court rises.

Judge: the Anti-Disney Club, consisting of you toxic anti-woke grifters, conservatives and nostalgia-blinded purists.

Nick: Your honor!

Judge: As punishment for breaking and entering and boycotting Disney, I sentence you and other members of the Anti-Dinsey Club who haven't come to their senses to watching every modern Disney movie that is CGI and live-action on repeat all week starting tomorrow.

And live from NY, it's Saturday night! SNL reference.

THE END.

Thanks for reading and have a nice day. And be sure to check out Rachel Zegler in Disney's Snow White, when it hits theaters everywhere, March 21, 2025.