The Wooden Gun Equation

The Wooden Gun Equation
The Wooden Gun Equation
The Wooden Gun Equation
The Wooden Gun Equation
The Wooden Gun Equation

The Wooden Gun Equation

More Posts from Hokey-lokey and Others

1 month ago
sue to reed : i didnt want part in reeds situationship since college. i love him dearly still. not romanatically.

reed to sue: We divorced on mutual terms and hold a familial relationship with one another still. I often ponder how Sue manages dealing with us all, I'd be a mess without her. My feelings for Viktor would have gone unnoticed for a longer period of time.

sue to johnny: my dear baby brother who i'd kill for.  also dont think i didnt see you in the hot tub with peter last night. CLEAN IT.
johnny to sue: the best older sister of all time lol we'd all die w/o you. plz stop cockblocking me.

sue to ben: ben makes me feel sane. i strive to achieve his peace. we need to finish that telenovela from last week...
ben to sue: Susie has skin thicker than mine. Though her taste  in romance could do better.

johnny to reed: i dont understand what ur spittin half the time but real 100%
reed to johnny: A great mind with much potential! [ ignore the heavy amount of guilt ] I admire your technical capablities as a mechanic. Please don't bring your escapades into my labs.

reed to ben: I still feel guilty for what I did to my best friend.  I find myself unable to say no to Ben.
ben to reed: I'd die for you. But sometimes I wonder how you're the smartest man in the world...

ben to johnny: Big drama queen. Teasing 'm is the highlight of my day.
johnny to ben: put cheese in your boxers lol
Im Abnormal About The Fantastic Four
Im Abnormal About The Fantastic Four
Im Abnormal About The Fantastic Four
Im Abnormal About The Fantastic Four

im abnormal about the fantastic four

3 weeks ago
Forgive Me, By Popular Demand I Am Posting Yaoi On Main.

Forgive me, by popular demand I am posting yaoi on main.

5 months ago
✨ Sleepy ✨ . . Mobius Channeling Todays Mood 💕

✨ Sleepy ✨ . . Mobius channeling todays mood 💕

5 months ago
The Onion + Loki (30/?)
The Onion + Loki (30/?)
The Onion + Loki (30/?)
The Onion + Loki (30/?)
The Onion + Loki (30/?)
The Onion + Loki (30/?)
The Onion + Loki (30/?)

The Onion + Loki (30/?)

1 month ago
Reed Will Literally Never Give Up On Trying To Let His Eldritch Abomination Archenemy Doctor Doom Into

reed will literally never give up on trying to let his eldritch abomination archenemy doctor doom into the house and the family. he will never give up on him. "whatcha got there" "a smoothie" since 1961

6 months ago

Thor: haha, my brother's so forgetful

Thor: sometimes he even forgets how to breathe!

Loki: *having a panic attack*

Thor: don't worry he does this all the time

1 month ago
Our Autistic King
Our Autistic King

our autistic king

3 weeks ago

Why I Don't Hate Ultimate Reed

Why I Don't Hate Ultimate Reed

Now, here’s a question for you. You’d think, with all the hate I have for 616 Reed, I’m destined to despise his Ultimate counterpart. And I’ll admit right away, he’s awful.

After having read Ultimate Fantastic Four, all the way to his downfall (but not further, not yet), I certainly have some thoughts on this incarnation of Reed Richards. But hate him? I really don’t. 

Let me explain in a long way full of side thoughts. 

An unwanted child 

Why I Don't Hate Ultimate Reed

They make it a point in the very beginning to show us that Reed’s childhood was no walk in the park. Instead of nurturing his natural gifts, his father constantly yelled at him for disassembling house appliances, his mother didn’t bother to stand up for her kid, and he got relentlessly bullied at school. The only friend he ever had was Ben, and he was pretty much the only one who cared enough to defend him. This could’ve gone one of two ways: he could’ve become someone who never wanted anyone else to go through the same thing, or he could’ve sworn revenge on everyone who’s wronged him. 

Reed turned out as a little bit of both. 

A star pupil 

Why I Don't Hate Ultimate Reed

When Reed got to the Baxter Building, his skills were praised and his achievements celebrated. It seemed kind of like what was happening to his 616 version; he even got the girl who, in this iteration, was a gifted scientist. Reed still got into trouble, but now, he had a trusty BFF, a girlfriend, and her tag-along brother, who, what do you know, was still good-for-nothing. If there’s a multiversal constant, it’s that Johnny Storm is a screwup. 

But this ain’t about Johnny. It is, however, about Sue. I have already heard more than once that Sue leaving Reed was what kicked him over to the villain side. 

But let’s not do that. Let’s not blame her for making a healthy choice for herself.

Reed was treated as a young superstar and, for the most part, his projects were not questioned simply because no one could understand what they were about. And well, if there was a military application to his discoveries… You know what’s what. 

Why I Don't Hate Ultimate Reed

The team had many adventures, but what they called adventures, more often than not it was a global disaster and somehow always a direct result of Reed’s misguided research. On paper, he blamed himself for each and every one of them. But accepting the responsibility and avoiding making the same mistake again are not the same. 

If anything, I would assume that every time he got blamed, he took it as simpletons yet again not being enlightened enough to understand his greeted purpose. That’s why he ended up dreaming of a different world, where his genius would be celebrated. 

A smart friend 

Why I Don't Hate Ultimate Reed

Many fans try to pinpoint the moment Reed turned evil. But how do you do that? It was never Sue’s fault (no freaking way in hell) by the time they met, he already had enough anger inside to use all of his inventions for the worst. As if all that hate he received throughout his childhood festered inside of him for a good decade. It was never resolved, and no one even tried to. The only time a therapist even crossed the threshold of the Baxter Building, it was a very evil version of Agatha Harkness who wasn’t even a witch but an entity hatched from an alien egg. And even she was more interested in Johnny. With his obsession with science and research, Reed naturally didn’t reflect on his own issues. And having a relatively strong support system helped keep him afloat for a while. But not for long.

An obsessed scientist

Why I Don't Hate Ultimate Reed

Now, people do love to blame Thanos for Reed’s asshole behavior when he got hold of the cosmic cube. But again, let’s not. He himself chose to tinker with the cube, it turned out he was always the reason for the cube’s existence. So all in all, Reed totally brought it on himself. And hey, that IS why Sue wanted time off from him. Believe it or not, Namor’s green underwear had nothing to do with that. 

Reed’s guilt over having created Doom didn’t really help. No, it only pushed him further into his research and led him to discover alternative dimensions in which Doom was always an evil tyrant. Now it could be one of two things. We do know that Dooms travel the multiverse and such, helping other Dooms ascend to Doomhood, but also, would Reed ever admit that there is a Doom somewhere whose sole purpose in life is to spread love, support, and understanding? Anyway, Dooms are responsible for Dooms, and Richards couldn’t have been more self-absorbed at that moment. 

An inevitable villain 

Why I Don't Hate Ultimate Reed

Now, to the main course. I stated this in the beginning, and I’m standing by my own words. I don’t hate Ultimate Reed. I don’t, because he is the only logical solution to Reed Richards. He is Reed left on his own, he is the Reed that Reed tries to suppress. The true Reed, if you may. 

That is his character growth, that is his natural path, if you consider how he approached every conflict ever, if you consider how heartless he is, and what ripples his actions send across the world. That is why Reed fears The Maker, and that is why The Maker hates Reed. 

The biggest difference between Reed-616 and Reed-1610 isn’t that one has completely stepped over the line and the other hasn’t (yet). It’s that the same actions are viewed as heroic and concerning. Of course, it all becomes a warning sign only after. In the words of Carol Danvers, the world’s been attacked by a pubescent gnome, and no one saw it coming. Except they should have.

Either way, it’s the fact that we accept one as evil while another one is slowly getting his public image reinvented, as if we’re supposed to just gloss over his history. 

Ultimate Reed is horrifying, just like 616 Reed should be. 

5 months ago
Well Yes
Well Yes

Well yes

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