Reblog To Give The Person You Reblogged This From A Fucking Break

Yes

Definitely

Absolutely

for your consideration: dead boy detectives where everything is the same except the gloves edwin (left) and charles (right) wear are these vivienne westwood ones

The very act of officially sanctioning a wizard orb destroys all its vibes

pondering my ricky rain frog

I briefly read this as stairs instead of stars, and golly gee wouldn’t that be a fun world to live in? Just to be clear, you can look at those for free at night too. 

the fact that stars exist and we can look at them every single night for free just makes me go !!!!!!!!!!!!

If I can recommend you do 1 low-effort thing for the love of God it is this:

Keep 5 cards in your pocket. One will say "yes", the second will say "no."

If you lose your voice, or lose speech, or want to make a dramatic embellishment at the right time, it is an elegant and efficient solution that is right there at hand.

But what if people question you from there? "Why do you have that card? Why would you do this? How long have you had that in your pocket?" For this, or whatever else they say, the third card: "I don't have a card for that."

"What the fuck," they ask. They laugh. They are bemused. You bring the energy back down with the fourth card: "I have laryngitis. I've lost speech. My throat hurts". Whatever you expect to occur.

The joke is over. Rule of threes. Now they are curious. They wonder about logistics. "How did you know I would say that? Is everyone so predictable?"

As a three-part bit, nobody ever sees the fifth card coming.

"I have powerful wizard magics."

Gets them every time

Operation Jet Set, the explosive cigar (twice)

I thought it would be badass to light my cigar off one of the lasers, died, and somehow thought it was the lasers, despite the autopsy saying “BOOBY TRAPPED CIGAR”. It took blowing up again to realize it was the cigar, and even then I thought “oh no someone’s trying to kill John Juniper”

what was your most embarrassing death in I Expect You To Die (any of the games) GO

Fun little math trick I find really helpful: the ratio of a mile to a kilometer is within 1% of the Golden Ratio. That means that if you have a good memory for Fibonacci numbers (1 2 3 5 8 13 21 34 55 89) you can convert pretty accurately by taking consecutive Fibonacci numbers.

For example, 89 kilometers is really close to 55 miles (55.3). Or, say you need to convert 26 miles to kilometers: 26 can be written as 21 plus 5, so taking the next Fibonacci number up gives 34 and 8, meaning it should be around 42 kilometers. Sure enough, it's 41.8 km!

Hey uhhh can you get me a drink im thirsty

(Slings the damp rag I’ve been using to wipe down the bar over my shoulder, dries hands on lil bartender apron) sure, what’ll you be having

just remembered this old clickhole video i used to be obsessed with

I’m sorry but did you say professionally

Hey can I borrow your job for a sec? I promise I’ll give it back…