It's So Unfair, Teach Me Your Ways 🙏😭

Shit I lost it at Tim's 🤣

people don't talk enough about how fucking funny it is that bruce can sub in his kids as batman when he's too busy. like can you imagine it from the league's perspective? imagine you have this really mysterious, geniusly scary guy that you know next to nothing about, never cracks a smile and yet always comes out on top, and one day he shows up to a league meeting and there's just something... off. about him.

you can't pin it down because he's literally acting exactly the same as usual and there's no reason to think there's anything wrong, but maybe he shifted in his seat one to many times, or he looked just a tad bit too bored during green lantern's case review, but something's just... odd. so you quietly ask superman after the meeting if anything's up with the bat bcs you know those two are closer and also clark can hear heartbeats so if something's wrong surely he'll pick it up? and without hesitation he leans over to you and mumbles 'yeah batman was busy, that's his 17 yr old son. he's a crime lord and kills people sometimes though so we're not allowed to let him into the weapons department.' and then walks away like it's normal.

like the whiplash the league must go through every time they realise that no, this is not their fearless dark and brooding leader, this is in fact one of his dipshit kids being forced to sub in bcs the real batman broke an ankle, is incredible.

wonder woman: so that's my proposed plan, what are your thoughts batman?

batman: hn. i think that- *voice raising two octaves* oh shit hold on my phones buzzing

the league:

batman, answering the phone and immediately dropping the Bat Posture™: what do you mean- aw come on little wing that's not fair! but- no, NO DON'T YOU DARE TELL ALFRED I'LL BEAT THE SHIT OUT OF YOU- IM SORRY OK I'LL BUY YOU MORE- *catches sight of the league watching him, baffled* *stiffens* ok listen i promise to replace them but i gotta go, please show me mercy iloveyoubye *hangs up*

the league:

batman:

batman: *coughs awkwardly*

superman: *sighs*

batman, to superman: ...red hood found out i ate his chocolate pretzels-

superman, shaking his head: just... just stop.

the flash: so this isn't batman either, is it?

wonder woman: if this one's also a criminal im losing my mind.

superman, tiredly: no no, this one isn't a criminal. this one's actually a cop.

batman: *sinks down in his seat* b's gonna kill me

green lantern, mystified: where does he keep GETTING you all from!?

'batman' dick, who made a pact with jason to Always Fuck With Bruce Whenever The Opportunity Arises: batman is a whore.

they think they've finally sussed out all 2 of batman's kids and then one day during a meeting 'batman' ends up on a 30 minute rant about different hacking methods this tech villain could be using that results in him half way through a sentence breaking off to say '-oh uncle clark could you pass me that pen- thanks, anyway so-' and then five minutes after that when the league have all been exchanging incredulous looks he finally freezes and is like. SHIT.

wonder woman: you're different from the other two, aren't you?

batman: maybe i am maybe i'm not, you can't prove it.

wonder woman:

green lantern: so like, are you new or have you just managed to avoid sub duty up until now?

superman, coughing: actually, this is this ones ninth occasion of replacing batman. you've just never realised before.

the league:

batman: yeah actually the other two are kinda mad i lasted longer than them...

the flash: how the fuck does he keep getting kids with the exact same build as him!??!?

'batman' tim, spent 20 minutes padding the suit out so he would look the part, still mad that bruce keeps palming WE work off on him: oh he forces us to take steroids for it.

the league, concerned:

superman, pinching the bridge of his nose: now come on red robin-

batman, fully tearing up and looking distraught: PLEASE uncle clark, it HURTS, you can't keep COVERING FOR HIM!

superman, frantically to the league: this one lies.

bonus

the league, squinting at batman:

the league: ...

superman: *head in his hands, too disappointed to do anything*

the league: *silently exchanging looks, wondering if anybody's brave enough to say anything*

duke as batman, fully aware this is fucking stupid but jason and tim fell on the floor laughing when dick came up with the idea and frankly, he wanted to see if anybody would have to guts to call him out: so, are we all ready to start the meeting?

Going to use this so much

The Complete DICKtionary

Or Robinese (or maybe you prefer the spelling Dick-tionary), whatever floats your boat. I wish people used all of these more often, they’re g-r-e-a-t. Including future slang + defenitions AND when it was first used for your pleasure!

Dick’s “unwords”:

Dick Grayson does NOT like affixes, and creates a-fix for them. Not all of these are opposites of an existing word though, and some are more punny than anything! In alphabetical order they are…

aster — a situation with good circumstance, a good positive experience. Opposite of disaster.

First used in: Schooled (01x05).

In a sentence: “If ‘dislike’ is the opposite of ‘like’, is ‘disaster’ the opposite of ‘aster’?”

concerted* — not worried, calm and composed. Opposite of disconcerted.

First used in: Drop-Zone (01x04)

In a sentence: “This mosquito’s mighty concerted over your pain.”

chalant — displaying anxiety, interest or enthusiasm. Opposite of nonchalant.

First used in: Alpha Male (01x13)

In a sentence: “Be as chalant as you’d like.”

ject** — to get rid off what’s left. 

First used in: Terminus (03x23)

In a sentence: “Now, let’s ject the rest!”

outfiltrate — infiltrating an infiltrator and disposing of them. Opposite of infiltrate.

First used in: Infiltrator (01x06)

In a sentence: “The infiltrators have been out-filtrated!”

renial — refusing to admit the truth or reality of something. Opposite of a being in denial.

First used in: The Pit (tie-in comic issue #11)

In a sentence: “You’re in denial Ra’s, ever though of being in ‘re-nial’ instead?”

sheveled — ordered, kept in a tidy way. Opposite of disheveled.

First used in: The Pendulum (tie-in comic issue #12)

In a sentence: “Really though he’d be a little less sheveled after that.”

turbed — being in a good state of mind or to be calm. Opposite of disturbed.

First used in: Welcome to Happy Harbour (01x03).

In a sentence: “Let’s see if you’re more turbed once we kick your can!”

traught — to stop worrying, to keep calm. Opposite of distraught.

First used in: Homefront (01x12)

In a sentence: “Well, get traught or get dead!”

whelmed*** — being level-headed or experiencing an event that falls neither below or above expectations. A “between word” for underwhelmed and overwhelmed.

First used in: Independence Day (01x01).

In a sentence: “You’re overwhelmed, Freeze was underwhelmed. Why isn’t anyone ever just whelmed?”

Bart’s future slang:

Bart Allen comes from 40 years in the future, and brought back some slang**** (and derivatives) that now everyone uses. Surprisingly, there hasn’t been a time paradox because of this. Yet.

crash — something good, awesome and rebellious.

First time used: Bloodlines (02x06)

In a sentence: “That’s so crash!”

meat — a derogary term for a non-Reach organic lifeform.

First time used: Salvage (02x04)

In a sentence: “Half the meat at Comic-Con is from my era.”

mode — feeling down or being defeated.

First time used: Bloodlines (02x06)

In a sentence: “Feeling the mode.”

Thanks for reading, now go and unleash your inner Dick and Bart to infect your friends with some nonsense blather!

*this is already a real word, not something Dick made up. It is still counted in the DICKtionary though.

**plenty of prefixes would suffice for “ject” (e-, sub-, re-, de-), and all of them are used. Also, Wally was the one who said “ject” first!

***technically, the word “whelmed” serves the same purpose as “overwhelmed”, with the latter being a word that superseded the former. This is apparently NOT the case on Earth-16, as no one actually corrects Dick on it (not even Artemis, who’s a college-level English proffesor). Who knew?

****please note that these words have different meanings depending on who uses them. To the Reach, “crashing the mode” refers to a loss of control or failure. Humans have inverted it, and to them it means success. The future slang defenitions are from the human perspective and it’s thus why it’s reffered to Bart’s future slang.

Sobbing, be right back 💔🥹

hello! Since you said you’re taking marauders fanart requests:

can you draw a fluffy dorlene one of them cuddling on a couch, or a really sad one of bartys reaction to regulus/evan’s death, or to both? If not it’s perfectly fine. have a great day/night and remember to take care of yourself!

<3

~new year's eve party at the Weasley's~

Y/n, who's extremely drunk: Harold, I have something to tell you but it's a secret okay!

Harry who is very sober: Y/n, I won't tell a soul.

~later on~

Harry: RON! RON! RON! Y/N HAS A CRUSH ON ONE OF YOUR BROTHERS!

Ron who is also very very drunk: BLOODY HELL! SERIOUSLY?!? ohhhh I wonder who it is... Percy? No he's a git...Charlie?! No, she doesn't really know him that well... BILL?!? Wait no, he's engaged... George? Wait or is it Fred? Wait which one of them is which....oh crap....*big gasp* WHAT IF ITS GINNY?! Wait no, she's my sis-

Harry:... It's Fred

Ron: OHHHHHH!!!

Ron:

Ron: which one of them is Fred again?

This is so beautiful

People who say that most of the Marauders fandom is made up, like it's a bad thing...you have another thing coming.

The whole point of our fandom is to separate us from the absolute BS of canon and JKR.

We are the ones who claimed the smallest part of Harry Potter and made it into something big and wonderful!

We are the ones who fixed plot-holes, improved representation and bought life to characters that were mentioned ONCE.

We made the most beautiful ship- Wolfstar along with Jily, Jegulus, Dorlene, Rosekiller and more!

We made a world where calling a non HP fan a muggle wasn't an insult.

We make the most elaborate pranks and have really good taste in music.

We are the ones that made the Golden Era seem like a spin off for the Marauders Era.

Our fandom knows pain and loss of a whole new level.

So yeah, what if half of it is made up? Not everything has to be canon for one to enjoy it. The Marauders are a testament to the creative minds and passion of all the HP lovers. It is art even if it's inspired by another piece of art. The Marauders fandom is a place untouched by jkr and we all know that if she ever decided to write anything about them it would just not live upto so many beautifully done fics, she really missed an opportunity with this. Therefore, it's safe and diverse which the author herself failed to achieve. Moreover, it's something that allowed people to reclaim their beloved fandom even when jkr ruined it for many. This fandom is OURS. Yes, we did not create the characters or the world but we made it BETTER.

Better ships, better representation, better world, better music, better characters and better everything!

I do not want to seem like I hate the original work, I don't and that's precisely the point. I love it, it's my childhood and the reason for my love for reading but at the same time, being mature and recognising the problems in the original series is essential no matter just how much it might break your heart. That's why I am thankful for The Marauders fandom, they gave me doorway to not abandon my love for Hogwarts and magic. In fact, I only fell deeper in love.

Thank you for reading my rant, you may proceed.

This is so good, I actually love Talia so much

Adopted Damian AU Index

Brief overview of the AU

Arc 1: Who's your Daddy?

Part 1

Part 2

Part 3

Part 4

Arc 2: Welcome to the family

Part 5

Part 6

Part 7

Interlude

Part 8

Arc 3: A Breaking Point

Part 9

Part 10

Part 11

Part 12

Interlude

Part 13

Arc 4: What could have been

Part 14

Part 15

Part 16

Part 17

Arc 5: Who’s Really Your Daddy

Part 18

Part 19

Part 20

Part 21

Part 22

Part 23

Interlude

Part 24

Part 25

Arc 6: 4th of July

Part 26

Part 27

Part 28

Part 29

Part 30

Part 31

Part 32

Part 33

Part 34

Part 35

Part 36

Part 37

Part 38

Part 39

Interlude

Part 40

Arc 7: Mother Dearest

Part 41

Part 42

Part 43

Part 44

Part 45

Part 46

Arc 8: Decisions, Decisions

Part 47

Part 48

Part 49

Part 50

Part 51

Part 52

Part 53

Arc 9: Fateful Meeting

Part 54

Part 55

Part 56

Part 57

Part 58

Part 59

Part 60

Part 61

Part 62

Part 63

Part 64

UNCASUAL REMINDER!!!!!!!

if you’re MAGA, if you’re racist, if you’re homophobic, if you’re transphobic, if you’re not a feminist, if you’re not against deportation, if you’re against abortions, if you like the orange man, if you’re pro israel

BLOCK ME RIGHT NOW!!!!

didn’t think i’d have to say it again but ig i do!!

Aww look at them, so precious

i kinda wanna make em into keychains

You know what's harder? Living a life where neither of them are real and I can't kiss either of them. That's what's truly hard nowadays..🥹

it is REALLY hard living a life where i’m not harty crouch jr and i don’t get to kiss evan rosier, guys :(

This was beautiful, absolutely and truly beautiful, I can't wait to see where it goes

Undoing Fate

neglected to regressor batsis! reader x platonic batfam

what if after 20 years of neglect from your family full of vigilantes, you face an unfortunate death, only to find yourself regressed back to when you were 16?

⤷ lots of emotional neglect, reader was batgirl, reader was a tryhard and an overachiever, reader had no social life in her first life, mentions of drugs, mentions of human trafficking, mentions of death, regression themes, toxic and unhealthy relationships, dysfunctional family, toxic mentalities, reader and everyone else needs therapy…, canon divergence, major character death(s) | tba | based on this

⤷ info! (background) 1 | 2 | read this first to understand the plot and each batfam better :)

⤷ art!!! 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5

⤷ if you’re bored m.list

00 | And she cried over nothing

01 | Sixteen again

02 | A quitter? | ?

03 | Everything is awesome…

04 | Until it’s not | .

05 | Untouched memories

06 | Another suffocating day | .

07 | —

08 |

taglist is closed‼️

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(idk why i can’t tag some of y’all, must be your settings i think 😓) (or let me know if i accidentally spelt ur user wrongly 😭💀)