Every Single Odd Number Has An “e” In It.

Please watch Brooklyn Nine-Nine!

So you know how you love me because you haven’t had a single meeting with anyone since I became your assistant? That’s because every time someone calls and requests a meeting with you, I always schedule it for March 31st.

Like there's a disconnect between farmers and consumers, how its seen as a commodity, just another product to be marketed and sold.

I remember one time I was working for a farm and we supplied produce for a bunch of local extremely fancy + expensive restaurants, and the restaurants themselves had wasteful demands, like only produce of a certain exact shape etc. strictly for aesthetic purposes

and one day they wanted to advertise that they source locally so they sent all their chefs to our farm and took photos of the chefs pulling carrots and whatever else out of the ground, all smiles and laughing together, and for the hours they walked around our fields and we watched them, not a single one of them so much as made eye contact with us while we worked around them.

none of them were interested in our jobs, our names, how the farm ran, or how we actually did the work they were pretending to do.

not sure exactly what my message is here, but this experience stuck with me.

It finally happened. During last night’s Ravenloft D&D game, I put on my best Rob Cantor impersonation and unleashed Actual Cannibal Shia LaBeouf on my players.

I have accomplished all I ever wished to as a Dungeon Master.

I opened the encounter almost verbatim to the song:

“You’re walking in the Svalich woods. There’s no one around, And you suspect the sun is dead. Out of the corner of your eye you spot him, Shia Labeouf!”

The players were stunned silent.

“He’s following you About 30 feet back. He gets down on all fours and breaks into a sprint. He’s gaining on you. And you can see there’s blood on his face! My god, there’s blood everywhere!

…roll initiative.”

It's been shown in the UK as well, there are variations of it such as one where a sheep farmer who is shearing his sheep shears his dog. Peak advertising

……..

this whole situation is very funny

credit to @cryptvokeeper for the idea!

(jester): we made friendship bracelets for you.

(beauregard): i’m not really a jewelry person.

(nott): you don’t have to wear them.

(beauregard): no. i’m gonna wear them forever. back off.

love in hate nation at two river theater, november 9-december 1, 2019

How'd you break your collar bone? Did you try to catch a cactus again: like you've never heard it before

mines is “this is a safe place bc i know harries would murder me: a true crime series”

I’m looking at gameplay of the canceled version of Resident Evil 2 that got leaked a few years ago and I forgot that they were going to have product placement with Pepsi

this is really fucking funny to me idk why