From The Makers Of Rats Full Of Soup, I Am Pleased To Bring You Soup Full Of Rat 🥫🐀

“i asked chatgpt—” well i asked the ceaseless watcher to turn its gaze upon you

wow. i can’t believe tomorrow is christmas.

Cats and small kids are curious about what you're doing in much of the same way. Sometimes when you seem to be up to something, they want to see what it is. If you try to keep a cat from sniffing something to find out what it is, they'll keep insisting, louder and louder, "let me sniff, let me sniff, LET ME SNIFF, LET ME SNIFF!!" until you do.

And then they sniff at it for two seconds and go "oh, oooh. Now I get it. Don't care" and wander off. But the demand to know will remain for as long as the thing is kept from them.

This one time when I was in nursing school, I had a training period in a kindergarten. One day I was chatting with one of the workers, telling her about this one time when I was in Kentucky due to my boyfriend at the time living there, and I saw this huge locally native spider-

And then I got interrupted by this one specific kid - a four-year-old boy who had taken a liking to me, sharp as hell and never missed a single thing. Looking at me with a deeply baffled, wide-eyed frown that kids that age do when Shit Does Not Add Up, he asked me: Boyfriend? If you're a boy, why did you have a boyfriend?

Not sure what else to say, I just shrugged and said that it happens sometimes, sometimes men fall in love with men or women fall in love with women. And I could practically observe in real time as his confusion disappeared in a blink, as this previously completely unfathomable piece of information entered his brain, was swiftly processed, and instantly filed into "boring grownup shit that I don't care about". He only had one follow-up question:

"What happened to the spider?"

PSA:

1. If you are not silly, it is vital you become silly

2. If you are silly, you must stay silly

2. If you used to be silly but have stopped, you must make all efforts to return to silliness

no MCU moment could ever hold a candle to the scene in the incredibles where Bob is at the computer terminal and in the background music the horn section is putting their entire pussy into it as he finds out with dawning horror how many of his old friends Syndrome killed

it's a shame you can't Cool, Silent, and Mysterious your way to being very close to people. we are unfortunately going to have to embarrass ourselves for this

Hannibal and Will taking a romantic walk in Florence

Hmm. Apparently it's starting to be that time of the year when the temperature might be the plausible answer to "why am I unreasonably mad for no good reason." And it's worthwhile to try sitting on the balcony to cool off for a few minutes to see if it goes away, instead of immediately starting fights with strangers on tumblr over which one out of the two of you is the one who doesn't know what it looks like when birds are fucking.