Coffeewasamistake - Drank A Double Espresso Once. Never Again.

I wanted to crochet something for my cousin's baby, but you know, procrastination...

I swear I blinked and the family reunion was next week. Started my project on Monday night, finished it Thursday, blocked it only hours before we had to leave

Pretty proud of myself ngl

“tumblr ceo sucks too” oh mood my bad I honestly forget we even have a ceo I kind of just view this website as a self governed purgatory that runs on sulfur and spite alone

Popping out of a hyper fixation to say that it would be really funny if Vecna targeted Steve after S4, via Kas or honestly even if he was digging his head before the end of S4, and it’s because of sexism. Vecna saw the one man there for the fight who has been around and assumed that was the leader. So he’s trying to parse out their plan based on the 40% Steve heard at all, of which Steve misinterpreted about half, and then the rest got filled in with bits of movies and random guesses.

When the fight goes down Vecna gets his ass kicked because the plan is only vaguely related to what Steve thought was going down.

Eddie: *trying to make nice as Steve gets ready to go out with Robin* Hi baby. Damn Stevie. You clean up nice! Look good enough to eat! Steve: *who is mad at Eddie over something he did earlier in the evening and is petty and hellbent on not smiling at anything Eddie says tonight* Woooow. As someone who has been partially eaten alive, that just isn't a compliment. Eddie: Don't be like that! Also, I literally have been more eaten alive than you!

Your Boyfriend is Hot, So Hot, Too Hot

Written for @steddiemicrofic

[ AO3 ]

June prompt: "Hot" | word count: 315 | rated: T |

Eddie has a hot, hot boyfriend.

That's great, right?

Except the AC is down, and they're melting.

Eddie watches as a droplet of sweat rolls down Steve’s glorious, wonderful tits. His chest hair is damp and gleams in the dim light.

Fuck.

His man is hot.

He lifts a heavy hand and gently strokes Steve’s chest, prompting a groan from his lovely boyfriend. 

“Stevie…”

Another groan.

Eddie takes his hand back and shuffles closer to him, admiring his lovely, shiny face. His parted lips call his own, and he can’t resist their siren call.

Steve opens an eye just in time to see his boyfriend push on his arms to get even closer to his mouth.

“Eddie…” he moans.

Their lips collide, moist, warm, parting to give way to their eager tongues. Eddie feels a sweltering heat growing inside him, something great, something terrible…

He flings himself far away from his boyfriend, sprawling his too-warm body against the barely cool tiles.

“Jesus H. Christ! I can’t, I can’t.” he whines.

Beside him, Steve makes a noise not unlike a dying cat. “Whyyyy.”

“Stevie, I adore you.” He rolls on the floor, trying to find a colder spot. “We’re gonna survive this. Believe me, no distance could ever destroy the undying love I have for you.”

“Please shut up, I’m melting,” is the only response he gets. Understandable.

“They’re going to fix the electricity, sweetheart. It’s been more than twenty-four hours. It can’t go on like this.”

Steve rolls over and mashes his face against the floor. “We can’t even fuck. I hate everything.”

The warmth is unescapable. Unless…

“You know what? I’m going into the pool.”

Steve raises his head, panicked. “Eddie, no, it’s not clean!”

Eddie sits up, reinvigorated. “I don’t give a shit. Lover's Lake has never been clean, and it hasn’t stopped anyone from swimming in it!”

“The pool is green, Eddie, green! The algae have taken over. They’re going to eat you.”

“Not if I eat them first.”

Tired of stories where the author worldbuilds a whole religion only to chicken out at the last moment by making the main character a skeptic. You mean to tell me that there’s all this richness in lore and culture, but you’ve trapped me with the one person in this society who doesn’t care about it? So bland. I could meet an agnostic easily enough by walking down the street, but your story is my one chance to hear the perspective of someone who follows whatever religion you’ve contrived. You made this whole world; convince me that your character really is from there.

“Queerness, to me, is about far more than homosexual attraction. It’s about a willingness to see all other taboos broken down. Sure, many of us start on this path when we first feel “same sex” or “same gender” attraction (though what is sex? And what is gender? And does anyone really have the same sex or gender as anyone else?). But queerness doesn’t stop there. This is a somewhat controversial stance, but to me queer means something completely different than “gay” or “lesbian” or “bisexual.” A queer person is usually someone who has come to a non-binary view of gender, who recognizes the validity of all trans identities, and who, given this understanding of infinite gender possibilities, finds it hard to define their sexuality any longer in a gender-based way. Queer people understand and support non-monogamy even if they do not engage in it themselves. They can grok being asexual or aromantic. (What does sex have to do with love, or love with sex, necessarily?) A queer can view promiscuous (protected) public bathhouse sex with strangers and complete abstinence as equally healthy. Queers understand that people have different relationships to their bodies. We get what it means to be stone. We know what body dysphoria is about. We understand that not everyone likes to get touched the same way or to get touched at all. We realize that people with disabilities may have different sexual needs, and that people with survivor histories often have sexual triggers. We can negotiate safe and creative ways to be intimate with people with HIV/AIDs and other STIs. Queers understand the range of power and sensation and the diversity of sexual dynamics. We are tops and bottoms, doms and subs, sadists and masochists and sadomasochists, versatiles and switches. We know what we like and don’t like in bed. We embrace a wide range of relationship types. We can be partners, lovers, friends with benefits, platonic sweethearts, chosen family. We can have very different dynamics with different people, often all at once. We don’t expect one person to be able to fulfill all our diverse needs, fantasies and ideals indefinitely. Because our views on relationships, sex, gender, love, bodies, and family are so unconventional, we are of necessity anti-assimilationist. Because under the kyriarchy we suffer, and watch the people we love suffering, we are political. Because we want to survive, we fight. We only want the freedom to be ourselves, love ourselves, love each other, and live together. Because we are routinely denied that, we are pissed. Queer doesn’t mean “don’t label me,” it means “I am naming myself.” It means “ask me more questions if you’re curious…“”

—

What Queerness Means To Me « Tranarchism (via docasaur)

I’ve chosen this as one of my first posts as it’s important to me that people understand what I’m talking about when I use the term queer.  

(via hollyloveholly)

I bought a roll of chicken netting to fence off my vegetable garden—which I haven't planted yet because it's been raining every single day for like two months and I didn't want my young tomato plants to rot, but the weather is finally improving. I'll plant my garden next week, and I wanted to trim the grass around it and clear the area of weeds, but then I remembered I have animals that can do this job.

So I opened the pasture in front of the (future) garden. Currently it looks like a long pile of dirt, because that's what it is (well, compost + llama manure + dirt)—but look how long it is! I'm feeling ambitious this year and I have quintupled the length of my initial hügelkultur mound.

You might be surprised to learn that Pirlouit was the first animal who noticed the opening in the fence and got out. It's not actually surprising because Pirou has a fresh grass-dar—but Pampe was very much surprised & vexed.

Everyone looked really happy to have access to this new little area!

Initially I thought I would be able to continue preparing the garden while they were eating, but I quickly realised I was too paranoid for that. I mean, it's Pampe vs. a small temporary fence meant for chickens. Enough said. I didn't dare to turn my back on her even for a minute, so I ended up just sitting in the grass next to them with a book, which was really nice.

Pampe decided to lie down in the grass to eat more comfortably, something Pirlouit still deeply disapproves of.

Poldine however thinks it's a brilliant idea.

Update: all my llamas are now horizontal, eating like three Roman emperors. Only Pirlouit continues to mind his table manners.

Of course this peacefulness couldn't last, and after stuffing herself with new grass for half an hour, Pampe remembered there was also a new fence to think about.

She decided to lie down again 5 centimetres away from it, so she could inspect it and strategise while maintaining a demeanour of relaxed innocence.

I was not relaxed.

You are exhausting.

At 7:30pm I started feeling torn, because I don't like to miss apéritif time but—could I run to the kitchen to get a glass of apéritif and some biscuits and run back before Pampe had time to do anything? (The kitchen is 15 metres away.) (I feel like this detail doesn't change anything and if I inserted a poll here everyone would massively vote "Pampe will have time to escape")

But you would be wrong!! When I returned from my quick and suspenseful dash to the kitchen, guess who was on the verge of doing something illegal...?

PAMPOLDINE. Bad llama!! She was interested in tasting the flowers on the other side and she was pretty bashful when I shooed her away.

I believe the only reason Pampérigouste didn't escape is because she assumed her daughter was about to, so her family's reputation was maintained, she would get to see me run and curse llamakind and straighten the fence grumpily, and she didn't even have to get up.

Which goes to show that she doesn't escape due to a deep and unquenchable thirst for freedom, but to aggravate me personally.

I settled on my ash wood throne to have apéritif, comfortably seated in full view of all the animals—

—so of course Pampe immediately got up and went to inspect the fence on the other end of this little pen, behind the hazel tree that was blocking my line of sight, in the one place that I couldn't see from my seat.

I had to get up to see what she was doing (and angrily wave a stick in her direction until she moved away) and when I returned to my tree stump there was a little insect swimming in my wine. Pampe lay down again, pleased with herself.

When it was dinner time and I kindly invited everyone to return to the pasture (Pirlouit & Pampelune complied without fuss), Pampe suddenly lay completely flat in the grass, in what was clearly an attempt to make herself invisible and be forgotten all by herself in this barely-fenced area, kind of like children who dream of being locked in a toy shop overnight.

I haven't taken my eyes off you all evening. Of course I can see you.

I had to poke her with my stick until she deigned to get up and leave (Poldine followed), but all in all it was a very successful little outing. I might do this regularly throughout the summer to keep the grass trimmed in this area, although the difficulty level will be greatly increased when I have to patrol the fence and protect my vegetables at the same time.

I'll add that when I went out later in the evening to close the chicken coop, Poldine & Pampelune were far away, grazing together under the plum trees, meanwhile Pirlouit and Pampe were still queueing in front of the part of the fence that was previously open. Both waiting for me to let them access this heavenly garden again (but with different motivations)

being fluent in two languages is so weird when you think too hard about it.... like just switching between the two of them while talking to someone who also speaks both and we're carrying on a normal conversation like my friend just asked me "t'sais où jpeux finder the movie we talked about yesterday?" bro what are you even saying but also I fully understand what you're saying

Selkie AU

He's back! here's part two of my selkie steve AU.

Even as a seal he is still the babysitter.

part1 _ 3

___ two more part in the way ;) ---