There is no more division between thorns and roses,
But there is one between your heart and mine..
So fill the void with an unsheathed dagger
And let my heart bleed red and divine.
Would you dare?
If you had no face
Would you still glance at the mirror
In hopes of seeing your feautures
Albeit in a blur?
If you had no eyes
Would you brave looking at the sun
To all but hope
That the blazing fireball can have your blindness undone?
If you had no hair
Would you be bold enough to weild a comb
To hope to know
How It bares its teeth to strands of gold brown and chrome?
If you had no heart
Would you dare to love with your being
Only to hope
To feel at least a little.. At least something?
IT DOES NOT MATTER WHAT KIND OF WRITER YOU ARE YOU CAN BE WRITING: POEMS, FANFICS, IDK NORMAL FICS, NOVELS, SHORT STORIES, IDK ANYTHING!! JUST REBLOG!!!
I can’t get you
Out of my mind.
You barge through every boundary
That I ever defined.
You occupy every room vacant
In every corner of my senses
In broad daylight there are illusions..
Could you not generate these pretenses?
You blur my sight
With crystal clear delusions
My reality does fumble
When you strengthen your visions.
Pleasantly you present
Your devilishly sweet smile
Then you linger and wander in my thoughts
For more than ‘a while.’
If only you weren’t a dream
And were truly near me.
If only you weren’t a fantasy
And were my blissful reality.
Another thunderclap rang out and woke me up once again. Just as I was about to drift off to sleep the thunder would jolt me into consciousness. They kept getting louder, though, as if it was getting annoyed of how quickly I could sleep.
But I had to stay awake tonight. I just had to.
3.26 am huh.
He should be here any minute now.
I looked out to the city. Little specks of light here and there.
Some would go to sleep and some were just waking up.. Street lights and headlights lit up a bit of the streets.
Light made most look around them in awe.. But somehow it made me wonder what or who thrived in the shadows.
I sat near the warmth of the fireplace, not caring about the dying fire.. - I didn't mind the dark so much you see. The orange hue reflected off the polished wood floor and shadows crawled on the walls.
3.44am....he should've managed to crawl up the first flight of stairs at least.
I brought out the first aid kit and kept it on the coffee table. Its just a matter of time. after setting everything up, I sauntered over to the kitchen. If I'm gonna stay up.. Might as well have some coffee.
I pulled out a mug and put on some soft music. The only problem was that I was supposed to feel awake but the chilly weather and soothing music only lulled me further to sleep.
Being sleepy didn't do much good but it was as if my limbs knew what they were doing. I absentmindedly drifted around the kitchen and somehow my mug was now filled with piping hot coffee... Dammit.. I must've got carried away.. There was enough left over to fill another cup. Oh well looks like I'm gonna be having tw-
The door slammed open and in stepped a 5'11ft tall towering man with his balance faltering and eyes red.
Well... I guess I'm awake now.
"why?... Why won't you just give me a chance? Us... A chance?"
Yep. He was drunk. He doesn't just go around slurring those words everyday.
"Iri-"
"No Roxy. I'm tired of you explaining the same shit again and again. You aren't fooling anybody.. But yourself."
A few steps closer and i saw the bruise on his jaw and his slightly busted lip. Why can't he just drunk cry or drunk laugh like other people?
".. And it's useless because I know you do."
Shit I zoned out.
He stepped ahead and put his palms on either side of my face, leaned down to meet my eyes and said with a smirk, "Well at least your eyes don't lie."
Damn him and damn that smirk.. That stupid smi-
And now his head was on my shoulder.
And I think he's sleeping. Great. How do I haul him to the couch now?
He just had to be a giant and pass out on my shoulder.
"You love me Roxy.. I know you do."
I sighed. I did.. But he doesn't need to know that... Does he? I'm no good at this love thing.
"Iris..I don't. Can't you just drop it already?"
His arms went around my waist and he whispered ever so slightly, "Oh dear.....I think you lie."
And the next moment his lips were on mine and my fingers were tangled in his hair. I could taste the alcohol on him and the way his lip throbbed from the fight but I could care less.
Because if he was drunk and hurt.. Then so was I.
He pulled back a little and I cursed myself for ever needing air when clearly the only thing I needed from the beginning was him.
"I hate to say this but... I told you so."
That's when the trance i was in shattered and i scurried back.
"Iris. We need to stop. That was a mistake. I don't love you.. Hell I don't even care ab-"
"Oh really? Is that why there's a first aid kit on the coffee table?"
A step ahead.
"Is that why you're up at 3 in the morning? Because you know it's a Friday and im going to come home dunk and beaten?"
Another step forward and now he was a breathe away from my face.
"Is that why there are two mugs on the kitchen counter? I'm guessing the mug on the left is my black coffee with 1 teaspoon sugar."
And that's when a little voice in my head said 'fuck it' and as soon as we landed on the couch in a tangled mess.. That changed to 'fuck yes.'
And that's the story of how I ended up wide awake throughout the night without any coffee.
Can you please reblog if your blog is a safe place for lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, asexual, aromantic, pansexual, non binary, demisexual or any other kind of queer or questioning people? Because mine is.
The kids scurried into class and settled down. Except a few who fell victim to their nerves and jitters, the children were quite excited. Oh this day would be the best! They'd be able to brag and boast about their parents.. Be able to show off how qualified and rich they are. And boy did Brianna love the thought of getting all the attention.
The boy she sat next to was quite happy too. He was smiling a bit too much for her liking though. Putting his pearly whites on full display, he made no effort in hiding his exhilaration.
Must've found a lone penny somewhere.. Why else would he be so happy?
It was true. The boy was ecstatic but not because of some lone penny.. But because he'd finally get to tell his friends about his father... His dear old man... His Poppa
Turn by turn the kids stood in front of the class and bragged about their parent's achievements and their bank balances. They spoke with a proud glint in their eyes and all but exclaimed about wealthy fathers and beautiful mothers till their voice went hoarse.
".. And that's how we ended up living in our humble 23 million dollar home." Brianna's little speech received a round of applause.. But her eyes held irritation and her fists balled up as her jaw clenched. He's STILL smiling!
Little Julio's smile had not diminished one bit.. If anything it had grown wider... Why?
Well because he was up next.
Brianna huffed and sat in her seat as she waited for him to start speaking. She wanted to be known for having the best. The best of the luxuries, style and standard of living.. The best parents would've been a good addition to the list. But judging from the smile little Julio was sporting, she was afraid he'd have it better than he-
"I live in the suburbs.." Brianna bit back a scoff. Suburbs?! I was a fool to think he'd have anything better.
"When I grow up I want to be like my Poppa." A low laugh resonated in the class. "Poppa?really?"
He was mocked but Julio wouldn't bother himself with that now. He was too happy. He had finally said something about his dad. His father who bought him his favourite ice cream and then gave him a piggy back ride home. His poppa was just the best, wasn't he?
"Um.. Julio? What does your father do?" the teacher asked. "You left that part out, sweetie."
"Oh. Um.. My father.. He roams around happily... Yeah. That's what he does." The class burst into laughter, unable to control themselves at his answer.
Roam around happily? Ha! Brianna couldn't help but snicker along.
The teacher, heaving a nervous laugh and shushing the class questioned again, "No, Julio. I meant to ask what your father's profession is. What is your father?"
"Yes Julio! Tell us what your father is!" A boy hollered from the back.
"He is um... He is a d-"
"A doctor?!"
"No"
"A dentist?"
"No"
"... A dog walker?"
This time Julio just shook his head in the negative.
Oh if only Brianna had brought some popcorn. She was enjoying the show oh-so-much!
This is good..Very good.
"Darn it Julio.. Just tell us! We are very eager to know." A girl in the back said, mock and sarcasm lacing her voice.
"My father is a very happy spirit"
"We know Julio. We all kno-"
"He's dead."
"My Poppa is finally happy because he's dead."
And that was the first time his smile faltered. And the first time that all but eight words had silenced the rowdy class.
She looked at me like i had grown two heads. Her dress was absolutely drenched and I was sure if I stayed in the rain for a minute more I'd have to wake up tomorrow sneezing.
"My knees are kind of hurting now.." I said in between laughs, "an answer right about now would be nice." My worry only grew as I saw her face held no trace of amusement.
Did I mess up? Or did I... - Her eyes were back to being lifeless and emotionless.. Like they were whenever she'd talk about her father. No!
Suddenly, as if something in her snapped, she took off- running out of the park. She ran as fast as her feet could carry her, slipping a few times because of the rain. My heart broke seeing how frantic she was.. Running away as if she were prey.
To my horror she ran onto the streets.. Thank God its late night and the streets are empty.. This girl is going to be the death of me.
"Cara! Cara.. Wait, please!" I ran after her. If she thought she could just run away from me and my feelings and her emotions, she's wrong. "Cara stop... Please!" I can't let her run away.. from us!
"Cara?! STOP!" I screamed as loud and clear as my cracked voice would allow me...,"Please. " She stood deathly still - well as still as she could be while crying- a street light illuminating her sobbing figure.
"Was it something I said?"
No answer.
"Did I do something wrong?"
No answer.
"Why did you run?"
No answer.
I combed my fingers through my hair in frustration. "Cara at least talk to me, damn it!"
"I DON'T DESERVE IT, OKAY?! I don't deserve ANY of it! Not your time, not your effort, not you and definitely not your love."
A deathly silence ensued which put a wall of sorts between us. She stood rooted to her spot and i couldn't help but feel my heart twist and clench in pain.
I took a step forward only to have her step - no, flinch back-... Well, ouch.
"Cara, who told you so? Who was it? Who told you that you didn't dese-"
"He did. She did. They ALL did... Damon, I would've brushed it off if it were just him but...How can ALL of them be wrong?!"
I couldn't tell what hurt more at this point. The ankle I twisted while running after her, my heart that shattered one word at a time.. Or the fact that there were years of hurt and tears behind every smile she put up.
"Cara, I won't go about reciting a cheesy monologue now because.. Well, I don't want you to punch me. So no, I will not say you deserve the moon and the stars and blah blah blah.. What I will say is," I took a deep breath in, this is it!
"I can only give you what I have to give. It may not be what you want or deserve.. But it is definitely something that you need, I need... We need. So, Cara, right now I don't have the power to heal you.. But i promise you that you will heal, I will heal..That we will heal--together. I offer you my love and I damn well have enough love to last a lifetime and then some...... I mean sure, its not good enough for you to deserve but-," I looked down as I came to the close of my speech.
Before I could finish my sentence I felt someone jump onto me and smash their lips on mine. She wrapped her legs around my waist and tangled her fingers in my hair.
I'm going to take that as a sign that I did well. Woot woot! Did I really just say 'wppt woot'? I'm a grown man for heaven's sake. Jeez.
We broke apart, out of breath, and rest our foreheads against each other's.
"Don't you ever say you're not good enough for me."
She giggled a bit as she jumped off of me and I bit back a groan of frustration as she took her warmth with her. "Oh, and by the way?...
... Yes"
It took me a second to realise.. And when I did I'm pretty sure I made her want to reconsider her decision, given the way I was jumping and squealing. I vaguely remember lifting her and spinning her around as she laughed freely, before i slipped the ring on her finger.
We walked together, hand in hand, getting drenched in the rain. For the first time I was myself without a care in the world.. Not caring who saw or judged or envied. I had her hand in mine and that's all that mattered... Other than the fact that she also agreed to be mine.. Yea.. You get the point. Dammit I just HAD to be awkward and ruin a fuzzy romantic story.
In that corner of the room
Behind the curtains of that room
Lives a small part of me
Lives a younger me.
The infant that I once was
The infant that became me
Resides in this room
As memories of sorrow and glee.
Every tear that stained
Every smile that was made
Resides in this room
Where i joyfully played.
I remember only
Two spent days
One where I left for greed
And one where the child in me stays.
The instant I left
The comforts of this room
The adult in me selfishly rejoiced
While my younger self drowned in doom.
The day i returned
Was a day of discovery
Of not the new
But the old, joyous younger me.
Should've been studying for my test but noOooo..
And now I have the drawing of a skull....
YEET ME FROM A WINDOW 💀
🌻🌻🌻WhAt cOuLd gO wRoNg?🌻🌻🌻 Insta: @coffee_beans_sprout_sunflowers
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