😈 You Are Not Bound By The Hays Code.

I am whatever gender has the shortest line at the bathroom

did i tell u guys i got into an argument on twitter bc i said foxes are dogs and someone tried to bring up their actual fuckin. classification or whatever and i just said “foxes are dogs cause they are fluffye” and they kept arguing with me. the entire time i was like “you will not survive the immigration to tumblr you are lucky we are not there right now”

those baby blues..

Butcher!Ghost + Soap

cw: blood

Clark: "Hey, B, are you okay, you look a little--"

Bruce: "What ever you are about to say, don't say it."

Clark: "Why?"

Bruce, in a whisper: "Because Dick has taken it upon himself to impress me with backflips should I appear upset."

Clark: "And this is a problem because?"

Bruce, still whispering: "Because whilst in all other ways he is a gifted acrobat, every time he does a backflip, without fail, he falls on his face and fighting back the urge to laugh everytime is starting to wear on me."

Clark: "Aww, Bruce. Sounds like he messes up on purpose to try and make you laugh, 'cause I've seen him do backflips lots of times."

Bruce: "Oh..."

---

Bruce, later as he tucks Dick into bed: "If you really want to make me laugh, you should do that thing where you jump onto Clark..."

---

Dick, the next morning leaping from the chandelier: "SKY ATTACK."

Clark, scrambling to catch him: "Jesus, Dick!"

Soap comes back to base after having teeth pulled and is not expecting Ghost to pounce the second he gets through the gate.

Ghost: "So where are they? I wanna see."

Soap: "What?"

Ghost: "The teeth. Gimme"

Soap: "I didn't... keep them?"

Ghost, upset: "They didn't let you?"

Soap, growing more confused by the second: "I didn't ask?"

Ghost: "You didn't- Johnny what the fuck?" 😟

Soap: "I was in a lot of pain, Lt., and still am, mind you-"

Ghost: "But... I woulda took 'em if you didn't want them."

Soap: "Ghost, my teeth were far from perfect, there's a reason they had to come out, not exactly great specime-"

Ghost: "THAT'S WHAT MAKES THEM SPECIAL!"

Soap: 😶

Ghost: "ONE OF A KIND!"

Gaz, who walked up in the middle of the conversation: "Think I've still got my baby teeth somewhere, you want 'em?"

Ghost, still distraught: "At least GAZ loves me."

Soap: "... my mouth hurts..."

Mermaid AU now with Jason!

more mermaid stuff

They're not supposed to go beyond the Coral Reef alone, but Dick loves sneaking out, and looking for various shells and stones especially because it reminds him of traveling with his parents. One night, Jason followed him...

Bruce and Alfred found out they snuck out and immediately started searching. But it was too late, Jason couldn't be found and Dick was barely alive.

One day during Dicks recovery, Alfred was on his way to check on him, but he was gone...

Shadowplay 🌤️

I think Jason is taller than Bruce but because they re-met in their suits, and Batman had a slight heel, Jason didn’t notice. But Bruce did. So now he has a bigger heel.

Dick has noticed but no one else is looking, he just knows because he’s been around B since nearly the beginning. And he is definitely holding that over Bruce’s head.

Bruce partly did it out of assholery but also a little bit of stupid paternal feelings about his baby being all grown up.

Jason still hasn’t noticed because they both wear boots and are still rarely in casual clothes/barefoot around each other.