Conflicted Chapter 31:

Conflicted: Chapter 18🎀

Maddy P.O.V:

“I don’t think I can. I’ll be leaving for Seattle soon.”

“Wait what? You didn’t tell me.” he wondered, holding the phone tight to his ear.

“Yeah. I kind of decided last minute.”

“But why?”

“Because of Izzy but mainly the fact that I miss home.”

“Are you sure I didn’t have something to do with it. I can’t help but feel like I did.”

“I’m just overwhelmed between this whole situation with you and Izzy.” I sighed, leaning my back against the wall.

“I didn’t mean to upset you but I felt like you should know about my feelings too.” he insisted.

“Axl, what about Izzy?”

“What about him? Isn’t he the same guy who cheated on you.” he snickered, rolling his eyes at the mention of the guy whom he felt used to be his best friend at one point.

“I’m not going to hurt him for you.”

“You already did.” he mentioned, thinking about the time we had slept together.

“I’m never doing that again.” I spat, slamming the phone down.

I sighed running my hands through my hair and went back to my room to find some clothes to wear.

It felt as if my suitcase grew a pair of eyes and burned its gaze right through me, upon entering my closet.

The bag was already open and a few clothes had been placed inside just incase, on an impulse decision I decided that I wanted to start packing.

My closet was a mess ever since I got here since I never had time to clean it because I was also busy with the guys and Duff.

I grabbed the jacket Izzy had left behind, the day he slept over and smelled his cologne, as I folded it up to put in a bag for him.

I still missed him despite the fact that we had a huge argument.

I did not feel the same way after speaking with Axl. It never gave me the butterflies in my tummy that Izzy would give me when he looked at me with those eyes of his.

… … …

“MADDY GET UP. WE’RE GONNA BE LATE.” I heard Duff scream, as I bolted upright in my bed, wondering what the hell was going on.

“You didn’t remember?!?”

“Remember what?” I croaked, rubbing my eyes from the light pouring in from the kitchen, as he held my bedroom door wide open.

“There’s a party at Slash’s. Everyone is invited. So hurry up and change.” he insisted, leaving my door open to grab some last minute items to stuff in his jean pocket.

Like condoms, cigarettes and the keys to his mustang.

I groaned getting up groggily and rushed to the bathroom to quickly freshen up, putting on a natural look with pink lipgloss before heading to my closet to pick out a dress.

Usually in Seattle I would just wear a sundress and call it a day but over here that wouldn’t go right.

Everyone here dressed like they were in Hollywood and so I settled on a slim fitting, silky baby pink dress with spaghetti straps.

And paired it with a silver necklace and matching diamond earrings that Duff had bought for me and my mom.

I grabbed Izzy’s jacket and wore it over my dress and grabbed the white strappy heels to complete my outfit.

“I’m not even gonna argue because you actually look pretty in that.” Duff said giving me a kiss on the forehead, and pushing me out the door.

“Is everyone going to be there.” I asked, indirectly wondering if Izzy was showing up, since he didn’t really enjoy parties as much as I thought.

“Yes Maddy. Izzy will be there too.” he grinned, raising his eyebrows at me.

I rolled my eyes laughing as we hopped into his car and headed to Slash’s new home in Laurel Canyon.

Izzy P.O.V

I sat smoking my cigarette endlessly, with a bottle of Jack as I put a hand through my hair wondering when the fuck this party was going to be over.

The only reason I came here was to congratulate Slash on his new house and the first thing I was met with was a bitchy Axl.

He was giving me strange remarks and looking at me weird even though he was fine a couple of days again.

I didn’t have any energy to entertain his behavior so I placed myself in a quiet area away from all the loud noise, girls and hard drugs.

Even the girls here were getting on my nerves.

They were so sleazy that it was a turn off but I guess that’s how Slash liked his women.

Everyone started cheering as I saw someone’s figure walk-in and bright blonde hair belonging to none other than Duff.

“Finally someone normal.” I huffed looking over where Steven was passed out with a bottle of tequila in his hand.

“Duff. Over here!” I shouted, ushering him over to me with my hand.

“Hey man. Sorry I took so long, Maddy was taking forever to get ready.” he complained rolling his eyes as he grabbed the Jack to take a big swig.

“She came?”

“Yeah. She’s right there.” he pointed, to a shy Maddy who was quietly standing by the counter where they were serving drinks, looking around to find someone familiar.

She looked so beautiful.

She had on this little pink, tight fitting dress, which was covered by my jacket and her pouty lips were covered in sparkly lipgloss, making me want to go over there and kiss her until it smeared all over her face.

“I can see you getting hard over my sister.” he repulsed, looking over to where I was staring at Maddy.

I laughed.

“Just go talk to her please. You guys are dying to make out with each other I can tell.” he remarked grabbing some shots from a passing tray and heading over to the herd of models that were perched on Slash’s lap.

“Hey Maddy.”

“Hi.” she spoke, her voice barely above a whisper.

“You look really pretty…I see you wore my jacket.” I smirked, placing my hand on her waist to pull her into me.

Her lips pursed and sparkling eyes glowed as she turned to face me, making me speechless as I stared at her beautiful face.

“You wanna go up to Slash’s room?” I asked, caressing her cheek with my hand.

"O-Okay," she said, allowing me to take her hand in mine as I led us both up the stairs, the noisy talk of everyone in the party becoming quieter and quieter until we found ourselves alone in Slash's room.

I removed my jacket from her, locking the door behind us and pressed her against it as I assaulted her neck with wet kisses, groping all parts of her body, enjoying how she reacted to each touch.

“M’sorry that I was mean to you even after you apologized.” She whispered to me, her eyes huge and brows raised, as she pouted her lips.

"I promise to never hurt you again." I whispered, kissing her all over her face and chubby cheeks as she giggled.

“You look so sexy in this dress but I would love to see how you look without it.”

“I want that too.” she coyly smirked.

I took her and laid her on the bed, sliding her dress straps down to display her breasts, alternating between sucking them sloppily and tenderly massaging them with my thumb flicking up and down her nipples.

“I love it when you kiss my breasts.” she whimpered running her hand through my hair, softly tugging at the ends.

I moved down her body, dragging the rest of her dress along and dumping it on the ground, grabbing one of her legs to perch on my shoulder as I spit on her pussy, pressing it in to make her wetter, inserting my finger in and instantly feeling her clench around it.

“Mmphh.” she moaned pushing herself forward to sink my finger in her pretty pink pussy to the hilt.

“Your so dirty y’know that. Letting your brother’s best friend touch you like this.” I grunted grinding into the bed, feeling turned on by her little whimpers and moans.

“I like being your dirty girl Izzy.” she moaned grabbing her breasts with her hands to push them together for me.

“Fuck.” I groaned taking off my shirt and pants throwing them somewhere across the room and getting completely naked along with her.

“I’m gonna fuck you so hard and you’re gonna sit there like a good girl and take it. M’kay?” I cooed, gripping the back of her hair and tilting her head back, asking her to open up so I could spit in her mouth.

She stared up at me through her lashes, extending her tongue out as I dropped a glob of spit directly onto her tongue, watching her swirl it in her mouth before swallowing it and sticking her tongue back out to show me.

"Holy Fuck. You're so fucking sexy, baby. Where did you learn that from?" I asked, slapping my dick on her pussy a few times, hearing the slick sound of her juices coating my dick.

“Some girls in school.” she whispered looking at me with those innocent eyes.

"No one else can see you like this. You’re all fucking mine." I spat, gripping her waist and forcing her down onto my hardened cock.

“Y-Yes yes. M’ all yours daddy.” she whined, as her body bounced each time I slammed her up and down my cock.

I groaned hearing her call me daddy and fucked her harder, as my grip on her waist tightened definitely bound to leave marks, hearing the sound of skin slapping each time I bottomed out into her.

“I-Iz-zy c-cum in me p-please.” She pleaded with me, making grabby hands, to kiss my lips as I felt her orgasm approaching.

“F-fuuckk. Oh fuck look at that fucking pussy milking my cock.” I grunted watching her pussy suck every last drop of my cum into her.

I stroked her stomach thinking about what it would be like to have a mini Izzy but quickly forgot after I came down from my orgasm and rolled over catching my breath as I lied next to her with her flushed out face and fluttery eyes.

“I love you so much Izzy. Please never hurt me.” she mumbled as she fell asleep.

I promise I won’t.

Conflicted: Ch.29 🎀

Maddy P.O.V:

He came down looking smug as ever. Not a care in the world judging by the way his clothes were half on.

“When did this happen?” he asked gesturing with his finger to Axl and I.

“Doesn’t matter. Deal with it.” Axl huffed, ushering past me to help move my suitcases out of the way of the front entrance of the home.

“Izzy babe-yy come back.” a voice whined from behind the tall bassist.

It was that Pamela girl from that day at the show in Seattle.

“Oh wow. What a surprise to see you here!” she sarcastically grinned tugging on Izzy’s arm as she used his shoulder to balance her chin on for support.

Izzy was too dazed to notice Pamela was leaning all over him as he thought about all those restless nights he spent trying to get over Maddy.

“Yeah….well it’s nice to see someone has moved on…I guess.” I whispered at the end, trembling on my own words.

“Wait baby-I mean Maddy.” he called out rushing down the steps to grab her familiar hands in his.

“Please don’t.” I croaked fighting back tears remembering the hurt he caused me when I waited all those nights to hear a phone call but never did.

“Look, I know what it looks like but she means nothing to me. I promise she’s just an easy lay when I’m fucked up and can’t think straight.” he rambled attempting to ease my concern while he rubbed my arms vigorously with the pads of his fingers.

“I don’t know what’s worse. Waiting all those nights for you to finally call me and tell me you missed me as much as I missed you….or coming here to find you with her of all people.”

“I couldn’t okay?!? I couldn’t stand to call you after letting you leave that night. I felt like a fucking coward.” he sighed releasing himself from me to run his hands through his hair.

“I waited day and night. And you couldn’t even give me a simple apology?” I shouted letting my tears stream down freely.

“I’m sorry Maddy. I fucked up I know, but you should know that I fucking love you so much baby.” he pleaded wrapping an arm around my waist to pull me in for a forced kiss.

“Urgh. Get off me. You’re drunk.” I grimaced wiping my mouth as I stormed off, shaking with anger.

“Get your shit together.” Slash said making Izzy feel like a complete fuck up.

“Oh and you should leave sweetheart. I would borrow you if the time was right but not today.” Slash added leaving Pamela outraged as she grabbed her heels and fled downstairs and out the door fuming.

“What’s her deal?” Steven asked walking in confused with a hand in his hair and drumsticks in the other.

……

“Hey, so Duff found out you’re staying with me for awhile and decided not to come.” Axl said as he rounded the table to come sit next to me.

“This day is officially the worst day ever.” I groaned running my hands through my hair, to help diminish the oncoming migraine.

“Don’t let em get to you. They’re just acting out but in a few days they’ll both come around.”

“No. Duff is acting out. Izzy is just guilty because he got caught fucking Miss Pammy, his favorite slut.” I spat thinking about earlier today and seeing her cover herself with nothing but a small towel.

“I came to get you here so we could talk about us. Not Izzy, yet you can’t seem to stop talking about him.” Axl complained shaking his leg up and down.

“I’m sorry okay?!?!…

“I stayed up all those nights waiting for him to call and he never did. Imagine loving somebody and being split apart from them against your own will and come to find out they didn’t even try to reach out to you.” I cried clearly still upset about the whole ordeal.

Axl didn’t say a word and instead quietly got up from his seat and disappeared behind his walls.

I got up to follow him and didn’t see him anywhere in sight so I decided to go up the stairs and see if he went into his room for the night only to walk into the wrong room.

Why is this my life.

“Wrong room.” he retorted, rolling his eyes.

“Y’know what. Fuck you Izzy.” I shouted.

“What did you just say?” he asked getting up from his spot on the bed to walk over towards me and grab my wrist with his hand firmly.

“Let me go.” I whined uncomfortable with his sudden demeanor change.

“How many times do I have to apologize Maddy? I’m sorry.”

“I really am.” he sighed getting go of my wrist only to grab my hand in his, interlocking fingers.

“No. I’m not doing this again.” I stated letting go of his hand to exit his room until he blocked my way forcing me to face him.

“Please. I promise I thought about you every fucking night, every day. I fucked all those girls because I thought it would help me get over you but it didn’t work. It made it worse.” he told me hovering close to my face with a stern grip on my waist.

“I-I don’t beleive you.” I whispered looking down at my hands as I played with the bracelet I had on, not ready to face those eyes of his that I missed so much.

“Will you beleive me if I told you the whole time….when I was fucking Pamela I closed my eyes and imagined it was you that was making me feel good.” he muttered close to my ear.

“S-stop it Izzy.” I whined pushing against his tall frame which stayed put.

“Maddy? Are you in there?”

Axl

—————————————————————

-i know it’s not a lot but i tried to keep up where i left off for u all!! <3hope u all enjoy ittt

if you film it while i suck it you could be a superstar ☆౨ৎ

Conflicted Pt:15🎀

Maddy P.O.V :

I didn’t bother Izzy any more than I already had that night.

Despite what occurred between Axl and Izzy they both did an exceptionally well job on stage and even shared the mic quite often to sing a number of songs together.

It seemed like when it came down to being a band,they were really close and it showed in their amazing performances.

It bothered me that I was driving a wedge between them both because I knew they had a long history, since they had known each other from Indiana.

Izzy told me all about Axl’s troubled childhood and how he felt bad for him, and would be there for him as much as he could despite Axl’s erratic behavior.

I felt as though I was messing around with their feelings too much and most importantly,wanted to make things right between Izzy and I.

But first I wanted to talk to Axl about everything that had transpired between us.

… … …

“You guys were awesome!” I squealed running up to my brother to congratulate him.

“Thanks sis. I appreciate it.” he said giving me a kiss on the cheek.

“Ew Duff. You’re all sweaty.” I scoffed wiping my cheek with the back of my hand.

“Where’s my kiss Duff?” Slash grinned moving his sunglasses down to peek at him.

“You’re definitely wasted.” Duff groaned heading back to the dressing rooms with Slash and Axl.

“How did you like the drums Maddy!” a rather hyper Steven asked, practically bouncing towards me with the adrenaline running though his system.

“It was great Stevie. I loved it all.” I nodded, to which he gave me his iconic grin before heading off in the same direction the others went.

I saw Izzy standing near the stage talking to some girls who were giggling and asking for his autograph.

So I made my way over there to introduce myself and let the girls back off or maybe make new friends.

“Hi everyone!” I grinned waving at the girls who didn’t seem to be any older than my age.

They looked at each other and then back towards me with an unpleasant look on their faces, practically sour.

“Who are you?” one of them spat chewing some mint gum furiously as she looked me up and down, judging my black dress.

They were wearing black ripped jeans with crop tops accessorized with chunky heels and paired with silver hoops and a bold red lip.

“I’m actually Duff’s little sister.” I replied with a warm smile in contrast to their nasty behavior.

“So you aren’t his girlfriend?” the same bratty girl asked now smirking at Izzy who was ogling her.

“N-No I mean y-yes I am.” I spewed feeling my cheeks get hot as soon as it came out of my mouth.

I didn’t dare turn around to face Izzy knowing well that he wouldn’t be feeling the same way.

“When were you gonna tell me you had a girlfriend Iz!” the girl whined like she had been waiting to spend the rest of the evening with him and her plans just got ruined.

“I never said I did.” he shrugged putting his hands up in the air before reaching down in his pocket to light up a cigarette, blowing the smoke towards my way deliberately.

I was caught off guard by the big cloud of smoke he released that I let out a few coughs causing the girls to laugh at me.

“Fucking virgin.” some girl snorted from behind the main girl.

Izzy laughed behind me like it was some funny joke.

“What’s so funny?” I asked abruptly turning around to face him.

I could feel how hot my face was from just turning around and trying to defend myself from Izzy.

“She’s kind of right. You are a virgin in a lot of ways maybe not sexually.” he snorted causing the girl who was vowing for his attention to burst out laughing.

I felt the sting of hot tears about to spill down my face and felt my breath increasing, trying my hardest not to let him see me cry.

“Aw are you gonna cry Maddy. Who fucking gives a shit.” he spat rolling his eyes at me and gesturing towards the girl to come to him.

She giggled and trotted over to where he was and right when I was just about to walk away, Izzy caught my wrist in a tight grip.

He looked me right in the eyes while giving the girl in front of him a big sloppy open mouthed tongue kiss.

“Izzy!” I screamed pushing the girl away from him to slap him across the face but he caught my hand and looked at me very aggressively with this fire in his eyes.

“Don’t fucking come near me.” he shouted making me flinch before he grabbed the girl’s hand again and disappeared down the hallway with her.

I ran off to the first room I could find in the empty backstage area and locked myself in there, bawling my eyes out as I sunk to the floor burying my face in my knees.

I understand that he was mad at Axl and I but I didn’t even let Axl kiss me.

I quickly adopted a raging headache from my tearful breakdown forcing myself to get up from the ground and wipe off my tears.

The dressing room was only a few doors down and I had to tell Duff I wanted to get out of here as soon as possible and without Izzy.

But when I went to open the door of which I thought would be the dressing room the girl from earlier opened it, in a now disheveled state, her hair was knotted and her mascara ran down her face as she wiped the corner of her mouth attempting to fix the smeared lipstick.

I looked over at Izzy who was pulling his pants up, attempting to find his belt in the mess of supplies that was in the janitor’s closet.

He saw me and didn’t say a word much to my dismay as I slammed the door shut not caring if I slammed it on the girl’s hand, wishing I had and broken her finger for being such a whore.

And felt the tears starting to pour dramatically again, this time without any control in the near future as my eyes got puffier by the minute, swollen by how much I had cried already.

I found the GNR manager leaving a room to which I assumed was it and ran towards it not caring who saw me in such a state because it couldn’t be worse than what I had just witnessed.

“Duff I w-wanna g-go NOW.” I wailed, embarrassingly loud for everyone in the dressing room to go silent and stare at me in shock.

“Maddy stop your scaring me. What happened?!?” Duff exclaimed rushing over to me with his brows furrowed.

“Iz-zy…I can’t I wa-na go now please.” I hiccuped, a mess with my tear stained face and throbbing head causing me more pain.

“Okay okay let’s go.” my brother said grabbing my hand and leading me towards the exit with our belongings.

I couldn’t see anything through my blurred vision as I hoped into the vehicle that would wait for Gun N Roses after every show, well now it was mine for the night as Duff and I drove back to his place safe and soundly.

I hugged my brother as I drifted off to sleep in his arms wishing nothing more than this to be a bad dream and that when I woke up, everything was back to normal.

Izzy P.O.V

“Can you fuck me now?” the girl asked looking at me with seductive eyes, or I guess that’s what she thought.

I didn’t even remember the girls name.

“No. I have a girlfriend.” I told her before I found my belt and made my way towards the door to get the fuck away from her before she asked for anything else.

“B—But I thought-

I let the door slam in her face not giving a damn what else she had to say, fishing in my pocket for another cigarette.

Maddy had given me some major fucking anxiety a few minutes ago when she caught the girl giving me a blowjob.

The only thing that was gonna help me right now was some fucking nicotine,booze and heroin.

I needed to get fucked up tonight to forget about all of this and her, for good.

I wasn’t the ideal guy for her and she was too much of a good girl for me to the point where I questioned my own morality sometimes.

She was better off with someone like Axl.

I sighed and opened the door of the dressing room when all of a sudden Axl pushed me up against the wall roughly and held me to it.

“The fuck did you do Stradlin.” he barked holding me tighter to which I pushed him harshly causing him to stumble.

“What are you talking about.”

“She left here fucking hysterical because of something you did. She wouldn’t even tell us because she was too busy sobbing.” he said putting his hands on his hips as Slash and Steven both shot me disapproving looks.

“I didn’t do shit! You guys are the ones who would’ve fucked if it wasn’t for me going to check on Maddy when she was trying to find the restrooms!” I shouted frowning st Axl.

“Dude! She’s fucking in love with you. She literally pushed me off and told me she loves you.” he sighed sitting down with a smack to his forehead with his palm.

“Okay well how was I supposed to know Axl!” I grumbled looking at him as more than a band mate but as a good friend for the first time in awhile.

It seemed like he genuinely wanted to help me out here.

“Look I’m sorry for going after her. I know how much you care about Maddy. And so now that you have her I need you to go and fucking find her and fix things. Make it right.”

“You’re right Ax. I gotta find her.” I spewed rushing to grab my things and jogging outside to one of our loading vans.

I hope it wasn’t too late….I just wished she knew how much she really meant to me.

She was the best thing to ever happen to me in awhile and I didn’t want to give her up.

Not for fucking anything.

Conflicted Pt:16🎀

Izzy P.O.V

Things were great between Axl and I. We had been talking again like old times and I had been staying with him,since Duff wouldn’t answer my calls.

I tried to call Maddy as well but I got no answer and it went to voicemail everytime.

Axl told me to give her some space and that she would come around but she never ignored me this much and I was started to feel uneasy about our relationship going forward.

“I think I’m going to go over there.” I told Axl, feeling confident enough to show my face to Maddy in an effort to save our relationship.

“Are you sure?”

“I don’t know how she’ll feel about seeing your face right now especially Duff. Y’know how overprotective he is when it comes to Maddy.” Axl snorted remembering the time that Duff almost knocked him out for misinterpreting the day he took Maddy out for a hookup.

“It doesn’t matter what Duff thinks. Maddy can think for herself, screw him for not answering my calls.” I spit, getting up from the couch to grab my jacket and keys.

“Just be careful of what you say to her. She’s probably overly sensitive right now.” Axl told me before I left out the door and to Duff’s place.

… … …

I knocked on the door for what felt like forever when the door suddenly opened to a stern faced Duff.

“Iz you need to leave now.” he spat not giving me a chance to reply as he started to shut the door on me, which I stopped with my foot.

“Duff please let me explain. I really love your sister and I fucked up but I can’t fucking live without her.” I begged, which was weird since I never thought I would have to beg Duff for anything.

“I knew you would pull some shit like this. I even warned her.” he lashed out,pointing an accusatory finger at my face.

“It’s not my fault! Axl was the one who tried seducing her and I found them both together at the Troubadour.” I spewed not thinking twice about the consequences it would have on Axl.

All I was thinking about was saving myself and looking good in front of him to get through to Maddy.

“What do you mean Axl and Maddy were together?” he asked this time directing his anger towards Axl instead of me.

“I saw them both, they were like leaning into each other or some shit.” I muttered, all of a sudden remembering why I was mad at Maddy at the first place.

“Y’know what, I shouldn’t have come. I’m sorry for bothering you.” I sighed feeling that aching pain I felt when I caught Axl and Maddy together that day.

“Wait. I know she would want to see you, after all she was crying for you last night anyways.” Duff sighed putting his hand on my shoulder to give it a tight squeeze.

“And I know you didn’t mean to hurt her. I guess sometimes I forget that we are rockstars and having a relationship can be pretty tough a lot of the times.” he added,letting out a deep breath as he suddenly remembered about Axl.

“So wants the deal with Ax. Does he have feelings for her?”

“Yeah. But don’t tell him I said anything. He gave me shit for how I treated Maddy last night and seemed genuinely hurt that she was upset. I wouldn’t take him as a threat.” I told Duff to let him know not to attack Axl just because of some things I might have let slip out.

“Yeah I guess you’re right. The poor guy hasn’t been very lucky with Erin recently either so I guess he’s just trying to find his place again.”

“Well anyways. Maddy’s in her room. I’ll give you both some privacy.” he said as he walked off to his room closing the door shut.

I suddenly felt these weird butterflies in my stomach.

Something I hadn’t felt since middle school.

Usually I never had butterflies because all I did were one night stands,hookups or quick blowjobs after our shows with endless groupies lined up to our pleasure.

It never once occurred to me that I would be nervous for a girl, ever in my life until now.

That feeling was for Maddy.

I twisted the knob slowly and opened the door finding her chest moving up and down softly, she wasn’t snoring but she was asleep for sure.

As I came closer I saw her sprawled across her bed, her comforter bunched up around her feet and her pink babydoll nightdress was bunched around her waist while she cuddled a stuffed bunny.

I came and sat next to her on the bed stroking her hair softly,away from her face as I watched her small body moving up and down with every breath she took, stirring a bit in her sleep when she felt my hand.

She reached up to grab it to which I assumed she thought was Duff because when she opened her eyes and saw me she immediately sat up almost banging her head on her bed frame.

“What are you doing in my bed?” she softly whispered, tugging her nightdress down from her waist to cover herself.

“I’m sorry.”

She looked up at me when I said that and I caught her eyes sparkling as her fairy lights shined down in the room, dimly lighting our figures amongst the darkness of the night.

I could see how puffy her eyes were and it hurt me to know that I was the cause of that.

I reached out to stoke her cheek but she swiftly moved away rejecting my touch.

“When I saw you and Axl together, I saw the way you both looked at each other. You lost your virginity to him so it makes sense that you feel different with him than me.”

“He really cares about you for some odd reason. I guess ever since you slept with him he’s had this soft spot for you in his heart.”

She was silently listening, not replying but instead analyzing everything I said, in her head, by herself.

“And I kissed that girl to make you jealous, when I came back to the dressing room Axl almost killed me because he said that you left crying.”

I saw her twitch when I mentioned Axl and how he almost tried to kill me.

“Which made me realize he might love you and that scares me because you’re supposed to be mine and the thought of him taking you away from me is something I’m not ready to accept.”

She still wasn’t saying anything which was getting on my nerves since I came here and tried to explain to her why I made a mistake.

“Are you just gonna sit there and not say anything Maddy?” I spat getting uncomfortable with the silence she had going on.

“I accept your apology Izzy. But I don’t want to get back together with you.” she croaked turning around to lie down, nestled, with her stuffed bunny.

I could hear her silent sniffles and didn’t want to bother her anymore, so I didn’t have to hear her crying.

Not because it was annoying, but because hearing her cry was the worst, knowing I caused it.

It made me feel bad for her.

“Maddy come on. I don’t want you to cry anymore. I love you, y’know that right?” I whispered laying down to pull her close to my body, putting an arm around her waist.

She didn’t move away from my touch but kept her head down in the stuffed bunny she was cuddling.

Her sniffles eventually slowed as she stopped crying and fell asleep with calm breaths.

I moved her hair out of her face and wiped off the tears that stained it, giving her soft plushy cheek some kisses before taking off my jacket and tucking us both into her blanket.

A rockstar couldn’t possibly fall in love, unless the right girl came along.

Conflicted Chapter 25🎀:

Maddy P.O.V:

The day had become increasingly cold, and the weather had been dreary and pouring all morning, casting a heavy fog over the Emerald City and dampening the mood for today's Guns N' Roses concert.

The band had already sold out Lumen Stadium and were determined to perform rain or shine, not wanting to disappoint their anticipating fans.

I didn't see them much throughout the day because they were at rehearsal early in the morning to make sure things went smoothly for their concert later. Izzy left me a letter saying he was going to be late arriving home, so I didn't bother calling him because I knew he wouldn't answer since he was preoccupied.

I was left upstairs in the meantime, looking through my closet for something perfect to wear to the event. I came upon something I wouldn't often wear: a tight black leather skirt and a black crop top paired with knee high boots.

I made my way to the mirror, double-checking my appearance to ensure that I would stand out from the crowd and that Izzy saw me differently, rather than as an immature youngster. Because the women he constantly dated were double his age.

“I’m home!” my mom called from downstairs, prompting me to rush down.

“How would this look at the concert?” I shakily asked, showing off the rock girlfriend outfit I had put together.

“Maddy, you know how I feel about clothes like that.” my mom grimaced, disapproving the tiny black skirt and top that didn’t look appropriate for my age.

“Please! Everyone wears this to rock concerts.”

“I am not letting you go to a rock concert dressed like a hooker sweetie. Find something else.” my mom insisted.

“Okay fine.” I sighed, trudging myself back upstairs.

If she didn't let me wear it, I'd sneak it out of the house. I could disguise my shirt by wearing one of Duff's t-shirts over it and a long skirt.

My mother would have no clue.

… … …

“Madalaine! Come down or else the boys are going to be late!” my mom yelled, forcing me to quickly spray some perfume and slap on my black choker necklace.

I rushed down the steps covered in Duff’s AC/DC graphic tee and my large pencil skirt my mother had bought for me, my first day of high-school which I never wore till today.

“Why are you dressed like a school teacher?” Axl snickered, at my choice of clothing.

“Leave her alone. She can wear whatever she wants, whether it be an old lady costume.” my brother replied, pausing afterwards and wondering why it came out so terrible yet sounded nice in his head, as he wrapped his arm around me.

Axl, Slash, and Steven burst out laughing, even Izzy, which made me feel sad embarrassed about my choice of apparel, making me contemplate if I should have worn a different outfit to cover my clothes below.

“Okay let’s go now.” Axl said, looking down at his radiant gold watch.

“Good luck boys! And don’t drive fast.” my mom warned, as we all piled out the door one by one.

“Don’t worry Mrs.Mckagan. We’ll be safe.” Steven chirped giving her a toothy grin.

We all crammed into Duff's car, and since there wasn't enough place for me in the the backseat, I had to sit on Izzy's lap in this hideous skirt.

I was starting to cringe while wearing the outfit and wanted to take it off, especially since I was sitting on his lap. I didn’t want him to think I was some loser dressed up like this for a rock concert.

So I quickly shoved the pencil skirt down my silky smooth legs, which had been moisturized and shaved because I intended to wear such a short skirt. And took off Duff's tee, leaving me in the clothes I had intended to wear to the show if not for my mother.

I heard Steven gasp, instantly, next to me, like a little child who had just seen his elder sister doing the worst conceivable thing.

“You look hot, Maddy.” Slash smirked, eyeing my short choice of clothing for the night.

I adjusted my top slightly so that my cleavage was not too apparent; I didn't want to seem trashy, but I did want to feel sexier.

“Whoa baby. When was this?” Izzy whispered from behind me, putting his hands on my visibly exposed waist.

I turned my head to face him, whispering in his ear that I wanted to look sexy for him, and returned his gaze with pouty lips and wide eyes. He looked at me with lustful eyes and grasped my waist more tightly, forcing me all the way back on his lap until my back was lying flat against his chest.

“I would’ve taken you right here if I didn’t have any respect for your brother.” he growled in my ear, yanking on my hair lightly.

My eyes fluttered as I heard his obscene remarks in my ear, and I was about to let out a small whimper but Axl had interrupted.

“What is going on back the-…..whoa.” Axl gulped, looking me up and down.

“Hey, stop looking a-…….Maddy what are you wearing!” Duff yelped, attempting to cover his eyes at his baby sister wearing a black mini-skirt and a crop top with skin prominent.

“It’s fine. I think she looks hot.” Axl grinned looking back towards me, and Izzy, who was scowling at him.

“Ewww. Stop it everyone! Stop staring at my sister please, for christ sake.”

“We can’t help that she’s sexy, man.” Slash shrugged.

Steven exclaimed, drawing everyone's attention to the large stadium that awaited them, as well as a few fans who had been camped outside.

Duff parked the car in the parking garage where there were no fans or workers to protect the band's privacy. They wanted to welcome their fans on the way in, but they knew their management would disagree.

“That skirt better not come up more than that.” Duff groaned looking at my mini skirt that was inching it’s way up towards my underwear.

I nodded embarrassingly, fixed my clothes in the reflection of the car window, and applied some lipgloss for Izzy.

“We have 30 minutes to set everything up and make sure our instruments are in tune.” Axl spoke, drinking some water and a cough drop to refrain his throat from straining.

“You guys go ahead, I think I forgot my cigarettes in the car.” Izzy said, patting down his pockets to see whether they were still there.

“Alright. Be quick.” Axl huffed, as the band entered in one by one through the large door with the huge banner that read, “Welcome Guns N' Roses to Seattle.”

“I’ll come with you.” I remarked, gazing between the boys who had disappeared halfway down the hallway and Izzy.

“Okay quick.” he replied, jogging to the car and opening it, rummaging among my discarded clothes and some rubbish in Duff's car, hoping to locate his pack of Marlboros.

“Where are they.” he groaned, searching through some old cassette tapes in a last minute effort.

“Why don’t we ask Slash, he always carries some.” I asked, leaning against the car, feeling the cold metal pressing against my exposed legs.

“I guess.” he sighed and closed the door, coming to stand opposite of me, gazing at my attire.

“What?” I muttered, blushing as I turned away from him, shying from his gaze.

“Just that you look great tonight. I never expected you to wear clothes like these, but now that you did, I want to see you in them all the time." he smirked and brushed my hair off my shoulders, revealing more of my top.

He traced my collarbones before letting his fingers slip the straps of my clothing down, allowing it to fall loosely like an off-the-shoulder top, and reached forward, laying a wet kiss on my neck, causing me to take a deep breath in and close my eyes at the sweet sensation of him biting at the sensitive flesh.

He spun me around effortlessly, and I placed my hands on the car and arched my back, exposing my ass through my skirt. I glanced back at him with lustful eyes, as he grasped my ass, rubbing the warm flesh, before spreading it apart to gaze my pussy, which my lacy black underwear had been engulfed by, but it was no problem for Izzy as he traced my puffy lips that spilled out, like it was a piece of art he was working on.

I heard the stadium share something about my brother's homecoming over the loudspeakers, which made me cringe and jump away from Izzy to fix myself.

“We should go..” I advised as he nodded in agreement and walked beside me, grabbing my hand and bringing it to his mouth for a quick peck before removing himself from to jog to the set where the rest of the band was.

I shook it off and noticed a large crowd of fans already gathered around the stage, looking up at the band, who were currently strumming out their instruments to determine whether or not their guitar was tuned.

Slash was grinning at some of the girls who were wearing little to no clothing, sending him flirting winks and obscene gestures, as well as flashing him parts of their, while my brother was receiving the same treatment and grinning.

Gross.

Steven was busy pounding away in his own little universe, his hair bouncing up and down with his speed, and as usual, Axl was nowhere to be found but Izzy was just quietly strumming his guitar as he looked out into the crowd, when I noticed one female in particular smiling and waving at all of them like she knew them personally.

“It’s Pam!” Steven exclaimed as he stood up from the drum set and waved her onto the stage.

“Hi!” the blonde woman chirped, wearing nothing but a small stage outfit, leaving nothing to the imagination.

“Pam, good to see you.” Duff smiled and hugged her while checking her out.

Gross again!

“Izzy. How are you?” she asked softly, looking at him as if she were in love with

“I’ve been good.” he replied uninterested, looking down at his guitar that he was currently strumming.

“Y’know ever since we broke up. I’ve been doing well and I hope you are too.” she cooed, trying to grab onto his arm to which he moved out of reach.

“I just told you I’ve been good Pam. Get over it.” he huffed, retreating away from her and to the back corner of the stage where he sat down on the end of the mini platform that was on top of the stage.

“Trust me. He’s way over you.” Slash smirked, looking over at me, making her snap her head to give me a nasty glare.

“Who is she?” the blonde woman named Pamela spat.

“Izzy’s girl and Duff’s little sis.”

“What is a little girl like her doing with Izzy? Doesn’t he like his women with a little more experience.” she laughed, clapping her hands as she flipped her hair back over her shoulder.

“Obviously not or else you would’ve still had him.” I told her rolling my eyes at her ugly attitude.

“You guys could fight…or kiss and makeup whatever you prefer.” Slash grinned, while Duff grabbed him and shoved him away from his little sister, annoyed by his raunchy behavior.

“Where’s Ax?” Pamela whined.

“Who knows.” I grumbled walking to where Izzy was.

“What’s up?” he asked, looking up from his guitar to meet my big brown eyes.

“Nothing. I just met your ex.” I sighed, looking back at the blonde girl who was now glaring.

“Ignore her. She’s just stuck on our past relationship.” he insisted.

“What about Angela? Was she doing the same?” I spat, annoyed by his nonchalant demeanor, at the fact of his ex showing up for their show.

“Baby-

“I’ll be back.” I interrupted, stomping backstage where all the employees were setting up catering and the tables for the management.

I wondered where Axl had gone to hide from all of the craziness, and found him sitting quietly in the dressing room, smoking a cigarette and drinking champagne.

“I thought you’re supposed to be rehearsing.” I mumbled, slumping down onto the blue couch that was placed in their dressing room by request of Axl.

“I am. I need to be away from everyone so I can do my vocal warmups.” he muttered, blinking his eyes in annoyance at my presence.

“Okay I guess I'll leave." I huffed and trudged out the door.

He did not stop me or change his opinion, instead allowing me to leave with nowhere to clear my head, which made me more frustrated.

First, that blonde woman appeared out of nowhere and turned out to be Izzy's ex, and then Axl practically booted me out of the dressing room.

I began to cry because I felt unwanted and started to feel like an idiot in these clothes, even though I had felt so confident from before, but now I was rushing past people, hoping to find the bathroom so I wouldn't have to deal with the shame of anyone watching me cry, and sprinted towards the women's bathroom when I finally noticed it.

There was no one in the restroom, so I quickly chose the farthest stall away from the door to close and slid down the wall, letting my tears fall across my naked legs.

The door opened, and I hurriedly wiped away my tears and tried to contain my sniffles, which were escaping at a rapid pace.

“I can’t believe he’s with that little bitch.” I heard the same woman from earlier shout.

“Who even is she?” another girl spoke.

I looked through the crack in the stall and saw Pamela with another girl who looked to be the same age as hers with a big grin and short brown hair, while they were styling each other's hair with hairspray and applying mascara.

“Adrianna, I can’t believe he would leave me for that.” she groaned, reapplying a dark shade of lipstick to her already chapped lips.

“It’s okay Pam. You can always go for Duff or Slash.” she cooed, wiggling her eyebrows in an attempt to make her friend laugh.

“I don’t want them. It’s either Iz or Ax.”

“Then go for Ax. He was telling me earlier when I visited him in the dressing room, how happy he was, to know that you came.” the girl with the brown hair spoke.

That bastard.

“I guess you’re right. Let’s go.” they both nodded as they made their way out of the restroom.

I ran out of the restroom and dashed over to the arena, suddenly remembering about the show, knowing my brother would be worried about where I went.

I could hear the song "Paradise City" playing throughout the arena, the same one that had been playing on my television when I presented my mother to Izzy.

I looked for Izzy and saw him strumming his guitar along, with the song, occasionally making a gesture to the audience, which exploded.

Axl was bouncing all over the stage and doing his dance moves in between singing breaks before returning to shouting his voice out.

Duff caught me peeping out of the curtain and smiled brightly, as did Slash, so I gave them a quick wave and a thumbs up to let them know they were doing an excellent job but they already knew it.

They had the girls going crazy, flashing them, and the boys in the crowd couldn't get enough of it either.

I saw Izzy look across at me with a blank expression on his face before, acknowledging my presence, and returning his gaze back to the crowd.

I rolled my eyes and returned my attention to my brother, bouncing up and down for him whenever he had a solo moment.

They played a few more songs before calling it a night and thanking everyone who came out to see them, notably Duff, who praised the city of Seattle for their support and expressed his love for his hometown beyond all else.

They all packed backstage and went to the dressing room to shower before sitting down with towels around their necks to cool down.

Slash came over with his curls drenched in water from the shower and flicked some of it off onto me making me cringe.

“Ew stop it!” I squealed, hating the tiny droplets that landed on my bare skin.

“Ew sToP it.” Axl mocked, making me angry with him all over again.

“Leave her alone guys.” Duff shouted from across the room, currently giving a groupie an autograph on her tits.

Ew ew ew.

“So, where is your boyfriend hm?”

“Thought he would want to spend more time with you, now that your dressed hot for once.” Axl smirked coming up behind me to play with my hair and twist it around his finger.

“Don’t touch me.” I spat.

“Damn. I guess he left you for some groupie then? Or maybe Pam…?”

I turned around to face him with my eyes narrowed.

“How do you know they used to be a thing?” I wondered.

“Everyone knew. We all shared.” he grumbled, as if I were too naive to comprehend.

“Shared?”

“Yes Maddy. Shared. As in Izzy would fuck her and pass her to me and then I would share her with Slash, so forth.” he stated as if it was no big deal.

I looked at him with a shocked expression making him roll his eyes.

“Yeah I know. I’m a terrible person. I don’t need to hear that from you.” he huffed walking away.

I now felt stupid for thinking the Pamela girl was anything special, but I couldn't get over how Izzy had nearly dumped all of his girlfriends.

I did not want to end up like that. And I definitely did not want to be shared.

I exited the changing room for some fresh air and noticed Izzy at the other end of the corridor conversing with the Pamela girl.

I scrunched my face upon seeing this and immediately stomped over to where the two were at and shoved the girl so hard that she fell to the floor with a loud thud.

“What the fuck!” she screamed, hissing in pain as her back felt broken.

“Stay away from my boyfriend.” I spat, grabbing Izzy and pulling him aside to a small corner around the hallway.

“I didn’t know you had that in you.” he smirked taking a drag from his cigarette.

“Why were you talking to her?”

“I wasn’t. She corned me.” he shrugged.

“Why are you acting like it’s not a big deal that she’s talking to you. She’s your ex!” I shouted, increasingly frustrated at how nonchalant he was behaving towards the whole ordeal.

“Maddy, stop overthinking about everything that involves me and another girl.” he hissed, grabbing my arm rather tightly.

“Let go Iz. It hurts.” I whined, ripping my arm from his grasp.

“Fuck m’ sorry baby.” he apologized, kissing my arm.

“It’s just, sometimes you don’t trust me and that makes me upset.” he told me, grabbing my hands in his to tug me elsewhere.

“C’mere, let’s go somewhere more quiet.”

… … …

Conflicted : Ch 17🎀

Maddy P.O.V

I woke up the next morning with Izzy draped over me, snoring loudly right by my ear, causing me to push him over.

Last night he had come to apologize but I felt as if he was forced to do it just because Axl told him so.

Nonetheless I accepted it because, an apology is an apology.

He looked so adorable sleeping that it almost made me forget that I was still pissed at him for letting a groupie suck him off.

I huffed and got out of bed not caring about the fact that Izzy could wake up and hopped in the shower to get ready for the day.

Hopefully he woke up by the time I was out so I could see the look on his face when I ignored him.

It was slightly amusing seeing the way he tried hard to get my attention but then again it was for a good cause and that was, to teach him a lesson.

Although I wasn’t so sure if I could avoid him after last nights cuddling.

I woke up in the middle of the night, feeling something hard poking my butt.

I guess he couldn’t control himself even in his sleep.

… … …

Duff was awake when I came into the kitchen for some breakfast, watching MTV which was currently featuring their new song, “Welcome to the Jungle”.

“Look it’s us!”

“Someone tell mom.” Duff exclaimed clapping with joy as he watched him and his band mates on national television.

“Um I don’t think so.” I scoffed, imaging how horribly wrong that would go if my mother ever got around to watching one of their music videos.

Which was filled with endless amounts of bad language, drugs and sexual innuendos.

“So I’m assuming Iz spent the night with you.” my brother asked seeing the black boots left by the front door.

“Yeah. He apologized.”

“And what did you say?”

“I accepted it but I told him we aren’t getting back together.” I sighed slamming the milk carton on the counter.

“He’s a great guy. Cut him some slack Mads.”

“What slack? Duff, he cheated on me with some trashy groupie!” I whined putting my hands over my eyes to prevent myself from crying.

If I had cried any more, my eyes would probably swell up and explode.

“Ahem.” Izzy coughed from my bedroom door.

I rolled my eyes upon seeing him, feeling angry as I made my way to the couch to sit next to Duff.

“Morning Iz. Want some cereal?” Duff mumbled through a mouth full of Fruit Island cereal.

“Nah I’m good. I’ll have some coffee though.” he muttered pulling out a cigarette.

“Maddy go make him a cup of coffee.” my brother insisted, too busy entranced by the models on the screen that were interviewing some rock band by the name of Motley Crue.

“Urgh. Fine.” I spat making my way to the kitchen and taking out some coffee I had just made.

“Y’know this is what it would be like if we were married.” Izzy smirked sitting down at the counter to watch me make his coffee.

“What? Being your slave…no thanks.” I scoffed turning around to grab some sugar.

“Quit it with the attitude. I said I was sorry already.”

“Don’t tell me what to do.” I huffed, roughly sliding the coffee to him, causing it to splash.

He looked at me enraged, wanting to tell me off but keeping his mouth shut because of Duff.

“Fucking brat.” he muttered grabbing the cup and leaving to sit by Duff.

He could be so mean sometimes.

But then he could be sweet, caring and charming which was the Izzy I fell in love with.

Not the Izzy that cheated on me and had bipolar mood swings.

I went back to the table they were sitting at to grab my cereal so I could retreat to my room but Izzy yanked me by the arm, pulling me into his lap.

“Ew. I’m out of here.” Duff revolted grabbing his magazine and leaving to his room.

“Why are you being so mean to me?” he asked twirling a piece of my hair in his finger.

“You’re the one being mean.” I exhaled playing with my hands in my lap.

He turned me around to face him and cupped both of my cheeks in his hands.

“I’m sorry for being such an asshole.” he said, kissing me in between every word.

“Just promise me that you won’t cheat on me again please?” I asked, blindly ignoring the cut he had left on my heart and accepting it for what it was.

“I won’t baby.” he promised.

“I missed kissing you.” he whispered, stroking my arm lightly.

“I-…I wanted to ask you something.”

He looked kind of offended that I dodged his kiss but nodded for me to continue on with my question.

“Do you think Axl loves me?” I shakily asked, not knowing if he was going to get mad at me or not.

The truth was, I was curious why Axl was being so caring and nice towards me recently.

And when Izzy told me last night that he almost beat him up over me, I definitely raised a few eyebrows over that.

“Why?” he sternly asked, his jaw tightening with anger.

“Because he almost killed you over what you did to me last night…remember?”

He scoffed pushing me back a bit on his lap but not all the way.

“Even if Axl loved you it wouldn’t be enough.”

“He has too much baggage from his past to maintain any relationship and will cheat on you as many times as he will tell you he loves you.” Izzy snorted laughing sarcastically about his dig towards Axl.

“I might leave sooner than expected to Seattle.” I interrupted.

“What why?”

“I haven’t really had the best time here. And I’m feeling homesick.” I replied, partly telling the truth and lying about the rest.

The whole truth was, that he ruined my desire to stay here any longer and I wanted to get away from Izzy, Axl and L.A. for awhile.

“You can’t just leave. What about us!” he snapped, his brows furrowed.

“I have school and other stuff…”

“So what….y-your just gonna leave me after I fuck up once and that’s it. No second chance?” he urged looking at me with his big hazel-green eyes that I loved.

I couldn’t come up with one correct answer so I kissed him, not knowing how else to cope with the fact that I might never see him again and put both of my arms around his neck.

“Fuck me Izzy.”

“What? Maddy-

“Make me forget about that girl please. Fuck me.” I begged, hoping it would help resolve some of the anger I was still habouring about him cheating.

And somehow convince myself that after this everything was going to be okay.

It didn’t take much to get me wet for Izzy, all he had to do was talk dirty to me and I was a mess down there.

“Take off your panties, quick.” he urged, pulling his cock out which was already leaking.

I took off my panties and let my nightgown fall back down to cover the fact that I wasn’t wearing anything down there and lowered myself onto his hardened cock, slowly.

“Ohh-“ I squealed feeling it stretch me out in a way I never had been before.

“Ride me.” he demanded letting his arms fall to my thighs, pressing small circles onto the warm skin.

“I don’t know how Iz…” I mumbled, embarrassed that we had to stop because of this.

“This Maddy.” he emphasized, grabbing my waist, which perfectly fit into his hands and grinding me down onto his cock before letting my pussy off his cock and slamming it back down with a squelch.

“O-Ow!”

“Just keep doing it until it feels good.”

I moved up and down slowly at first before releasing his cock all the way and then shoving myself back down the way he taught me, feeling my little nub touch the stray hairs at the base of his cock.

“T-That feels g-good.” I moaned,letting my eyes roll back as he took over, pounding up into me relentlessly.

“Yeah?” he coaxed, pushing my hair out of my face to stroke my cheek as he gripped onto my waist with the other hand.

I reached back down to grab the end of my nightdress pulling it up above my breasts, letting them bounce freely to put on a show for him.

He looked up at me while he took one in his hand and massaged them roughly, spitting on them and rubbing it in on my nipples.

“I want a kiss.” I whined grabbing his hand and interlacing our fingers.

“C’mere.” he cooed grabbing the back of my neck to push me onto his awaiting lips.

We were making out sloppily not worrying about hiding our moans, making me about to orgasm quicker with how roughly he was kissing me.

It turned me on whenever he grabbed me by my neck and took control but my euphoria didn’t last very long because right when I felt like I was about to cum I heard someone yell really loud.

Almost like a girl.

“OHH MY GODD.”

“BLEACH. SOMEONE GIVE ME A GALLON OF BLEACH NOW.” Duff screamed covering his eyes as he made a disgusted face at his sister who was practically naked, straddling her boyfriend/his best friend who was also half naked.

Izzy laughed upon seeing Duff’s expression remaining calm and in no hurry to cover up but I immediately jumped off him rushing to grab my panties and ran to my room.

“I’m going to tell mom! I cannot believe I had to see this.” Duff whined stomping his foot like a big baby as he grabbed a pillow and threw it out Izzy who didn’t seem to give any shit about being caught.

“And you!” he said pointing a finger at Izzy.

“You owe me for having to witness this shit. I want to barf right now.” he groaned kicking the couch with his feet to which Izzy thought was hilarious.

“I’m going for a run now. I need it.” Duff yelled slamming the door shut.

Izzy came into my room shortly after and pulled me up to straddle his waist.

“No Izzy I’m not in the mood anymore.” I whispered, avoiding his face.

“Okay fair enough. But were you serious about going back so soon?” he asked burying his face in the nook of my neck.

“Yes. I need to get away from you and from this place.” I sighed tugging at his arms to let me down.

He let me down onto the bed and ran a hand through his hair, staring at me baffled.

“So you’re just gonna leave us behind? I made one mistake for fucks sake!” he grunted pulling out his favorite anxiety medication, a pack of cigarettes.

“That doesn’t matter, why did you let that groupie give you a blow!” I shouted scrunching my face in anger.

“She doesn’t mean anything to me. It was just a blowjob and not even a good one.” he scoffed, blowing out the smoke.

“How would you feel if I got on my knees for Axl!” I retorted hoping he understood how I was feeling right now.

“I’d fucking kill him.”

“Exactly.”

“No. This is different because I barely knew the girl. Holy shit.” he huffed getting frustrated with my constant bickering.

“Get out.”

“Fine. Fuck this. I don’t need you when I have multiple girls who line up for us after every show.” he shouted on his way out.

I heard the door slam and buried myself into my bed, letting out a deep exhale as I looked out the window, wondering if I should leave sooner than later.

Just when I was about to grab my suitcase I got a call and got up to answer it.

“Duff’s not home-

“Maddy. I wanted to talk to you actually.” a deep voice spoke from the other side of the phone.

“Axl?”

“Yeah. Listen I know Izzy loves you and you love him but I have to tell you this to get it off my chest.”

“What is it?…”

“I think I’m in love with you and I was wondering if you would be willing to give us a chance?”

This had to be a dream….

Mean Girls (2004) dir. Mark Waters

Conflicted : Pt. 7🎀

Maddy P.O.V

Axl joined us a while later. It was peaceful but then Axl mentioned something about rehearsal and Izzy started arguing with him about it.

And instead of helping, Duff turned up the radio even more to drown them out leaving me stuck in the middle.

"Guys stop please!" I pleaded pushing them away from both sides.

“Sorry, Maddy. But my friend Izzy here has an issue with my singing, and I need to figure out why." Axl argued.

“That's because everytime something doesn't go your way you disappear and our fucking song goes unfinished!" Izzy yelled.

“Izzy stop.” I begged, pleading with eyes.

“Whatever.” he scoffed turning the other way to face his window.

Axl gave me a strange look, glancing at both of us before shrugging it off.

“Axl how are you and Erin?" I asked, not sure how else to start a conversation.

"She’s fine. Why do you care?"

“I was just asking." I said, rolling my eyes.

“So did you enjoy my L.A tour, or would you like another private one?" he grinned, scooting closer towards me.

I noticed Izzy shift in his seat when he heard Axl, so I played into it.

I laughed and twirled my hair with my finger before responding.

“Yes I would like that."

“Are you gonna wear that sexy outfit of yours that you wore last time?” he smirked.

“Okay that’s enough Axl. Leave the poor girl alone.” Izzy spoke.

“What’s wrong with you? You’re just jealous because you want her.” he retorted making Izzy scrunch his brows.

“I don’t!”

“Save it Izzy. I can tell the way you look at her you have the hots for your best friend’s little sissy.” Axl mocked.

“What are you gonna do about it?” Izzy asked putting an arm around me.

“Fuck off. She doesn’t want you.” Axl barked pulling me into his arms.

“She doesn’t want you either!” Izzy spat yanking me back towards him.

“STOP.” I yelled causing Duff to slam the brakes.

“What’s going on!” Duff yelled turning around to face Izzy, Axl and I.

“Nothing.” we all said in unison.

“Okay well not that any of you were paying attention but we’re here.”

We all climbed out of the car wanting nothing more than some fresh air.

Axl and Duff went running towards the beach but Izzy pulled me back behind a shed and shoved his lips on mine hungrily.

“Stay away from Axl.” he whispered pulling off my lips.

“You’re not my boyfriend.” I huffed crossing my arms.

“It doesn’t matter. Your mine.”

Duff P.O.V

I wasn’t a dumbass as everyone around me thought.

I saw the way Izzy looked at Maddy and I intended on letting him know to back off.

If there was one thing I was keen on, it was keeping family away from any of the guys.

Including Izzy.

He wasn’t exactly boyfriend material. And I saw the way he treated women like they didn’t mean anything to him.

I’m not saying I’m any better but I know I’m better than Izzy regarding women.

He didn’t even flinch when Angela was being shared between the guys.

It was a normal occurrence to him and I wasn’t gonna let him turn Maddy into a slut.

“Hey man you coming or what?” Izzy asked coming up behind me.

“Yeah. Hey Iz can I ask you a question?”

“Sure what’s up.”

“Are you seeing Maddy behind me back?” I asked scanning his face for any reaction.

“Maddy? Come on Duff she’s like a little kid.” he joked.

I saw Maddy listening to us out of the corner of my eye and once Izzy turned around she stomped off looking pretty upset.

What was that about?…

“Okay. I’m just making sure bro.” I told him giving a pat on the shoulder before joining Axl in the water.

Maddy P.O.V

I trudged around the water looking out to the waves when I saw Duff talking to Izzy with his arms crossed and brows furrowed.

“Are you seeing Maddy behind my back?” Duff asked giving Izzy a stern look.

But instead of admitting to it, Izzy gave a big laugh and shrugged it off calling me a little kid.

What the hell does that mean?

I stomped off annoyed by the attitude I was receiving from his and went to sit on the bench which was located on the other side of the beach.

This day sucked and I just wanted to go home and forget about all of this mess.

Clearly Izzy didn’t care enough to tell Duff about our relationship and I didn’t want to lie to my brother about it either.

So I decided I was going to call it quits with Iz.

I felt like that was the right thing to do.

“Maddy.”

“What do you want Izzy.” I sighed in defeat.

I quickly wiped the leftover tears off my face and scooted over allowing him to have a seat.

“I know you heard the conversation with Duff.”

“It’s fine. You did what you had to for your friendship.”

“I know but it was fucked that you had to hear that and so I’m sorry.”

“What exactly do you want me to say though?” I spat back.

“I just heard the guy I’m in love with talking in such a demeaning way about me.”

“You love me?” he softly asked pushing my hair out of the way so he could see my face.

“I don’t know what to say.”

“Just tell me you love me. Even if you don’t mean it please.” I begged letting a tear fall down my cheek.

“Fuck Maddy.” he shouted.

“You don’t even know what love is. You don’t know what you’re talking about.” he urged.

“This is humiliating. I have to leave.” I bawled getting as far away from him as far as I could.

“Wait.” he yelled but I kept running until I bumped into Axl.

“What’s wrong?” he asked pulling me into a hug.

“I-Izzy. Doesn’t love m-me.” I sobbed crying into his bare chest with my salty tears.

“He’s no good for you. I’ve known him ever since we were little. He’s never gonna change.”

“Maddy. What happened!” Duff called out grabbing my face between his hands.

“Nothing. C-can we go home?”

“Of course. Let’s go right now.”

Conflicted : Pt.5🎀

Maddy P.O.V

I woke up the next morning and took a shower throwing my clothes into the dirty laundry pile.

I couldn’t look at those panties anymore without thinking of what had happened last night between Izzy and I.

I went outside and to my surprise my brother was up early watching some cartoon called The Simpsons and eating a bowl full of cereal.

“Good Morning sleepyhead.” my brother said through his stuffed mouth.

I couldn’t help but feel a pang of guilt when I looked at Duff who had no clue what I was doing or thinking about one of his best friends.

I really liked Izzy and I wanted him to be my boyfriend.

“Do you know where Iz went? I woke up and all of his stuff was gone.” he asked coming around to place the cereal bowl in the sink.

“No clue.” I mumbled staring down at my nails that I was furiously picking at.

“Oh well. He’ll turn up sometime if not now.” my older brother shrugged grabbing his jacket and keys.

“Come on. Get dressed I’m finally taking you on that L.A tour.”

“Really?” I grinned real big.

At the end of the day I really missed my brother and I wanted to hang out with him alone, at least for one day aside from all the chaos surrounding his life.

“Duh. Now go get dressed.” he said.

Izzy P.O.V

I was at the usual diner the band would go to after we would perform when the door opened and I saw Duff and Maddy walk through.

Fuck. I was here with Angela.

“What’s wrong baby?” she purred in my ear grabbing at the side of my jean jacket.

“Nothing.” I said shrugging her off me.

Duff immediately spotted me and came running over with Maddy following behind like a lost lamb.

She really didn’t belong in L.A. She was too much of a good girl to be around here.

“Hey man! I didn’t know you would be here too. Why’d you leave the apartment in such a rush.” Duff asked while taking a seat down in the booth right next to Angela and I.

Maddy was just standing at the end of the booth awkwardly waiting for Duff to acknowledge her.

“Sis come sit next to me.”

“Actually wait why don’t you sit next to Iz because I always have to piss and it’s annoying asking people to get up for me.” he said climbing back out of the booth and tugging Maddy forward to sit in between Duff and I.

“Maddy scoot closer.” Duff whined practicing shoving Maddy into me.

She smelled so good.

Like strawberries and vanilla.

She was staring down at her hands which were in her lap and nervously played with them when I nonchalantly extended an arm around her.

“Get your arm away from my sis.” Duff groaned staring at my arm placement.

“Relax Mckagan. It’s barely even touching your precious baby sis.” I huffed rolling my eyes at his overprotective behavior.

“Oh so your Duff’s little sister.” Angela retorted.

“You look like a little child. How old even are you?” she laughed.

“I’m sixteen.” Maddy spat looking at her with an annoyed expression.

She was so cute when she got all mad. Her nose scrunched up and her lips squeezed back.

“Sixteen is still a child.” she joked blowing out her cigarette in front of the table.

“Yeah yeah. We get it.” Duff said clearly annoyed by Angela noticing Maddy’s discomfort.

“So what’s a little girl like you doing in L.A.” she asked.

“I’m here to visit my brother.” she said glancing at Duff who gave her a smile back.

“Hm.” she replied.

Duff and I started talking completely ignoring Angela and Maddy with our daily music discussions.

Which were arguing about who the better bands were.

The Rolling Stones or Led Zeppelin..

“I have to take a piss.” Duff quickly said scampering off to the restroom.

“Yeah me too.” Angela said getting up from her side of the booth and walking swiftly towards the bathroom.

I grabbed a cigarette from my jacket and lighted it up while chugging at the bottle of beer I had in front of me.

“You look pretty.” I said turning to face Maddy.

She had on these light wash blue shorts that would ride up everytime she moved around too much and a white babydoll top held together by two strings at the top of each shoulder.

We were sitting so close together that I could feel the warmth radiating off her body as my jean clad leg touched her bare one.

“Thanks.” she sheepishly blushed staring at her hands.

“Look at me Maddy.”

“You’re so fucking beautiful you know. Don’t hide from me.” I said bringing my finger to turn her face towards mine.

I could feel our lips brushing against each others but before I could close the gap.

She quickly pushed away from me and scooted away with a pout.

“I didn’t know you actually had a girlfriend.” she said crossing her arms with an angry expression.

“Angela’s just a fuck Maddy. She doesn’t mean anything to me.” I sighed taking a sip of my beer.

“What makes you think I’m different than her. For all I know I could just be some quick fuck for you as well.” she stated worriedly.

“You’re different. You should know that.” I told her scooting back to her again.

“I like you.” I breathed out.

“Really.” she asked looking up at me with those big brown eyes I fucking loved.

“Yeah.” I said before planting a big wet kiss on her pouty lips and pulling back slowly so that there was a line of spit still connecting us to each other.

“Izzy.” she giggled unable to hide her excitement.

“Izzy.” I mimicked playing with my hair and laughing sheepishly imitating her behavior.

“Stoppp.” she blushed.

“I’m only messing with you baby.” I laughed grabbing her and pulling her to my side .

“Iz stop. Duff will come out any minute now.”

“Don’t worry. Angela and him are quite busy at the moment.” I winked.

“Ew. Are you serious.” she groaned.

“Yeah. What did you think was taking so long.” I said shaking my head at her naivety.

I pulled her into my lap and continued to make out with her.

“You know…we could do the same.” I joked tickling her sides making her squeal.

“No. That’s dirty” she said looking into my eyes.

“What’s dirty baby?” I asked playing with her hair and twisting it tightly at the ends.

“Fucking in a dingy diner restroom.”

“You don’t like that? You wouldn’t want me to take you to the corner of the diner and into the bathroom to fuck the shit out of you?” I softly asked before tangling my hand in her hair and pushing her onto my lips.

“You make me so hard Maddy.” I groaned scooting her back a little so she could see the growing bulge underneath my black pants.

“Izzy stop. Not in front of everyone.” she quietly muttered before climbing off my lap and fixing her shorts.

“Okay guys. We should get out of here.” I heard a voice yell from across the diner.

It was Duff.

“Why?” I asked.

“Because the manager caught Angela and I in the bathroom.” he shyly admitted scratching the back of his head.

“Ughhh Duff stop. I don’t wanna hear it.” Maddy whined with a disgusted expression.

Duff and I burst out laughing as soon as we left the diner and made our way to his car.

“Wait where’s Angela?” Maddy asked.

“Don’t worry about her.” I shrugged hoping into the front seat.

“Your coming back to my place right?” Duff asked starting the car.

“Yeah. Your place.” I sighed leaning back into the seat and staring out the window.

I don’t know how to tell him that I like his little sister. I don’t think I ever can.

I hope Maddy can still be with me behind his back. I just hope she doesn’t crack under pressure one day and tell Duff about us.

Or else that’ll ruin Duff and I’s friendship forever and possibly even the band.

And I won’t let the band fall. Not even for Maddy.