Do You Think Anyone Did Her Hair?

“THE PHAAAAAANTOM OF THE OPERA IS THEREEEEEEE…WITH A STEEL CHAIR!!!!”

I got attacked by a fire extinguisher. Somehow, the Phantom of the Opera was at fault. This happened while I was reading fanfiction on my school Chromebook.

My goal form is a hallucination you see at 2am and freaks you tf out, and becomes seared in your mind for the rest of your life

It’s 5am, I cannot sleep and I just tried to reason if Sandy cheeks would’ve died from the water pressure in that one SpongeBob episode where she tries to go without air

"I'm gonna need everyone to just perform a fucking psychic lobotomy on yourself" - Brennan Lee Mulligan, 2024

My favorite jokes are about mispronouncing philosophers' names but I'm afraid it's a nietzsche subgenre

A rescued pelican in the backseat.

If anybody knows how 300 pounds per square inch of water pressure would affect an average Eastern fox squirrel please let me know, my sanity depends on it

It’s 5am, I cannot sleep and I just tried to reason if Sandy cheeks would’ve died from the water pressure in that one SpongeBob episode where she tries to go without air

My uncle was injured in an explosion at the cheese factory today.

He was hit by a chunk of da Brie

Dude; having titties…that would be lit as fuck