this is just not so unpopular opinion from me but i cant give a shit about bsd anymore tbh....... i'm getting bored at the current pace of the manga and the plot. i don't like the way the story is written right now. i do like their banters/yapping/messages/speeches about politics and war tho. i think it's an interesting read. but for a series that is full of fast-paced action, the manga is sure slow as hell. i feel like the monthly release schedule and pages for a chapter are dragging away the intensity and tension of the supposed action in the manga. one month is enough to forget the 'hype' yk?
as someone on reddit says: "my favourite thing about bsd are everything BUT the main manga" and i have never felt validated. while i don't follow the main manga on time or as hardcore, i still consider myself a fan. i think my favourite part of bsd is gaiden and nikolai. hell, i think i've been too fixated on nikolai that i am more interested in my fanon understanding of his character rather than what canon has shown us—not that they are ever enough
so yea, not really looking forward to further chapters that much. i don't even mind spoilers or anything. i see spoilers way before i read the chapter. i feel like the story goes downhill on recent chapters but i couldn't quite put a finger on it. but i can safely say, the next half of the DoA arc is really not doing it for me. there are good moments, yes, but they all passed by so quickly and somehow, i can see characters who have fallen (i.e. the 'dead') will return back alive and well and safe.
i still don't like how fyodor's ability is not actually having something to do with lethal touch. i genuinely think his 'actual' ability doesn't give Crime and Punishment its sense and grace in a way. i mean, nikolai's ability is The Overcoat and although i firmly believe his ability is not limited to clothes/coats, it's still shown that his cloak is a big part of his use of his ability.
and besides, lethal touch is threatening in its own way anyway... making fyodor to be an ageless immortal feels like taking away the humanization in him, if that makes sense? immortal who is pure evil? pfft haa classic villain in the marvel universe. an anemic human who has a deadly yet simple ability and managed to start wars around the world?
terrifying. intimidating. human.
This ask
VALE boys x shy gn reader
I'm sorry it took so long anon😭
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Victor Grantz
Expressing yourself has always been hard. Being shy makes talking to people a really hard task for you. Victor understood. He isn't good with words but can talk in necessary situations so it's not as hard for him. But he still understands.
Every day he saw how you struggled to keep a conversation and how nervous it made you feel.
He decided to leave notes for you. Notes that had words of encouragement. Notes that showed how much he loved you.
You always found notes in your pockets that had words that calmed you down.
It was his way of comforting you when he wasn't there.
Today was a tiring day. It was Emma's birthday and everyone decided to celebrate it together.
Parties aren't your thing. Kevin dragged you with him to talk to everyone else.
This was one of the most awkward days of your life.
You just stood there while everyone else talked and laughed.
Victor saw you and came towards you. He took your hand and walked to the green house.
The greenhouse is a quiet place. All the flowers and plants make the place feel like another world.
You sit on a chair as the moonlight shines on you.
Victor can't take his eyes off of you. You look beautiful is all he could think of.
He sits next to you and takes your hand.
“[Name].” He says.
“Hm?”
“You know you can ask me for help right?”
You giggle. “Where did that come from?”
“I just don't like seeing you struggle so much to talk to people. I mean you slightly change when you're talking to different people. It's tiring no?”
You look down to the floor. He's right. Altering your personality every time you talked to someone was tiring. You could only be yourself around Victor.
“I know you're worried it's just…I can't do anything about it it just happens.” Your said with a low voice.
“I know.” He said while smiling. “That's why I said you can ask me for help."
You blushed. You felt happy. He was the first ever person you expressed yourself to. The fact that he goes out of his way to tell you this made you feel warm inside.
You lean towards him and kiss him on the lips.
“I love you.” You said.
“I love you too.”
Andrew Kreiss
You've been participating in matches day after day.
You not only have your matches but end up participating in place of others when they can't attend.
This match was a long one. You ended up kiting Bane for pretty much the whole game but in the end you lost.
You came back to the Manor with cuts and bruises all over your body.
Andrew rushed to Emily's office to check on you.
“Are you OK?” He said as he panted.
“I'm OK don't worry.” You said with a weak smile. “I'm just tired.”
He took a deep breath and sat on a chair next to your bed.
He took your hands and sat there quietly.
The sight of you like this made his heart ache but also made his blood boil. Those selfish people. How can they keep giving their work to you?
“Andrew?” You said as you brushed a strand of hair away from his face.
“Why do you keep doing this?” He asked.
“What?”
“This. Why have you been attending others' matches left and right?”
“...Are you mad?”
“Of course I'm angry. I'm angry at you for throwing away your needs. I’m angry at you for overworking yourself. Im angry that you never asked me for help.!”
He went quiet for a second and then continued with a lower voice.
“But most of all I’m angry at myself. At the fact that I’m so useless that I don’t stand up for you…Whenever I think of the times where I could've pulled you away when someone asked for you to do something. The times where if I didn't let you attend a match you wouldn't have been in pain. Whenever I think of those I hate myself. I hate myself because I didn't do anything.”
Andrew understands you well. You two are really similar. So you can understand what he's feeling right now. You know how much he's beating himself up for it.
You drag him into a hug and you don't let go.
You start to kiss the top of his head and caress his hair.
“I'm sorry.” You muttered. “I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry.”
“Please. Just stop wearing yourself out. For me.” He said in a low voice.
You nod. “I promise.” You whispered.
Luca Balsa
How many times has Orpheus made you “help him” and then dump all of his work on you because “he got a new idea”? You've lost count at this point.
You've gotten used to it but you obviously don't enjoy it but you just can't say no to him. You wanted to a couple of times but you just couldn't bring yourself to do it. You didn't want to turn him down when he asked for your help. Well that was one of the reasons. You didn't want him to dislike you. You don't want anyone to dislike you but Orpheus was one of the people that the idea of him disliking you scared you.
It wasn't only you who was bothered by this situation. Luca was really worried about you. You would come to his room, exhausted and drop yourself onto his bed and pass out pretty much every night.
Luca always stays up late. You have to drag him to bed if you want him to sleep. But after this routine with you and Orpheus started you would sleep without a word out of exhaustion. On some days he barely even saw you.
Orpheus told you to wake up earlier than usual today. You didn't sleep last night which didn't help. You get up, wash your face, get changed and go to the library where Orpheus told you to meet him.
“These are murder case files. I'm going to use these in my Novel.” He says. “So read these papers and write me a summary of them. I need it by tomorrow evening.”
You blacked out for half of the conversation. Your mind started to properly work just now and this is all you understood. You sighed and were about to say “I'll do it.” When you felt a hand on your shoulder.
“Sorry Orpheus.” Said a person you cherish. “But I need y/n's help today. I know you had plans but it's really urgent. I'm sure you can do this yourself.” He continued with a smile.
“Oh.” Said Orpheus. “Well I guess I wouldn't mind since they've helped me so much. Then bye for now.” He takes the papers and takes a seat in the library.
“What's wrong?” You ask Luca.
“Come on I need your help.” He takes your hand and drags you to his room.
You enter and he closes the door. “Well?” You ask.
He lays on the bed and pats the spot beside him. “I need you to sleep.” He says with a cocky smile.
“You dragged me all the way here to sleep?” you asked a bit annoyed. “I was supposed to help Orpheus.”
He gets up and sits on the bed. “You call that helping?” He asks. “He is using you. Well even if he doesn't have bad intentions he still doesn't care if you want to do it or not. You can't just say yes to everything people ask of you.”
He sounds a bit mad but he's keeping his cool. You lower your gaze and play with your fingers. You don't know what to say. I mean what can you say? You know he's right.
He sighs and gets up from the bed to stand in front of you and takes your hand. He grabs your chin and gently pulls up your head. “I'm worried about you OK? You're just tiring yourself like this it's not good for you.”
“You're one to talk.” You say annoyed.
He laughs. “Well at least I do something I enjoy. Plus you always make me rest. But you just won't listen to me no matter how hard I try.” He kisses your forehead. “I won't let you try to please people like this anymore. You have to start saying no to them.”
You don't say anything. Instead bury your face into his chest. Luca wraps his arms around you and kisses your head. “Come on. Let's sleep. Neither of us have slept these days.”
You tighten your arms around him and nod in response. Then both of you get on the bed and drift away into a deep sleep.
Edgar Valden
Failed rescues, terror shocks, short kites. You really messed up in today's match.
Well, everyone messes up.
But Freddy came up to you and started bickering with you.
“How can anyone be so bad?”
“Practicing is a good thing you know?”
“If you're going to mess up everything don't play the games.”
“Why did you even come to the Manor?”
His remarks didn't stop.
You couldn't say anything. You knew you did terribly in the match but it happens to everyone. He doesn't have the right to be this mad. But you couldn't say anything. Not a single word came out of your mouth. You just stood there while he said anything he wanted to you.
“What makes you think you can talk to them like that?!” You heard someone shout from across the room.
You look over Freddy's shoulder and see Edgar. He was fuming and coming towards Freddy.
“Your little lover over here messed up the whole game!” Freddy shouted. “Why do they even participate if they plays like this?”
Edgar grabbed Freddy by the collar. “You're disgusting.Have you forgotten how many times you've messed up the game yourself? How many times our win turned into a loss because of you? You think you have any right to be shouting at them like this?”
Freddy was surprised. His face was turning red. He quickly snatched away from Edgar's hand and left the room.
He huffed. Then he turned to you. “Why weren't you saying anything to him?” He looked angry.
You just burst into tears. He was surprised and came to his senses.
“I'm sorry. I didn't mean to say it like that. I'm sorry.” He panicked and pulled you into a hug.
“I'm sorry. I couldn't stand seeing you like that.”
You just cried into his chest. Freddy shouting at you like that scared you.
He caresses your hair and whispers “It's OK.” Sometimes.
After you've calmed down he pulls you away and wipes your tears. “Please. Stand up for yourself OK?” Then he pulled you into a hug again.
“I'm always here for you.”
scaramouche is so freaking hilarious to me cause like. look at him. he's a short man with so much rage. he's famously very pretty when he's not snarling at you. he wears an ostentatious hat that can be seen from a mile away. he was 'set free' by his mom/creator for having a heart then proceeded to spend the next five centuries looking for one. he was adopted by a bunch of swordsmiths when found in the wild. he knows how to make a sword as he was taught by the best professional swordsmoths of his country. he knows how to take care of babies and small children, even if they're sick. he also knows how to make a nation collapse on itself and gained a whole moniker out of it. those qualities somehow exist simultaneously. he killed the entirety of raiden gokuden but spared the descendant of the man he thought had betrayed him because even then he held love in his heart for him. he literally endured dottore's mad experiments for probably centuries. he's been to the abyss. he figured out that Teyvat's sky is fake. he straight up reached into the tree of life and erased himself so that he could reverse the fate of those he had wronged. not even vengeance. that wasn't even priority, no he wanted to save the ones he loved. when that didn't work he accepted his memories and decided to work on atonement and vengeance. at the same time. he enrolled in the akademiya – the highest educational facility in Teyvat – by getting into an argument with a bunch of researchers because he has to have the last word. he woke up in a fantasy world and scoffed at the prophecy handed to him. he saved the replica of one of Gold's most dangerous creations by saying 'you need head pats, friends and therapy'. he then proceeded to give the head pats, friendship and therapy to his baby-sized dragon friend. he wakes up everyday and chooses violence, then somehow managed to be kind anyway.
he's so funny. I love him so much.
I still have no idea how tumblr works lmao..
have nikolai!
The first Beta Build for Potion Pleasing has been released!! 🧙🧪 This contains the prologue of the game that's around 2300+ words!!
You can get access to it by joining my Patreon on the Teacup tier!
soul catcher fool's gold concept
midori's denial of his humanity isn't simply limited to physical dimensions, advantage in the game, or even symbolic meaning. it's what makes him so difficult to analyze. any time he gets even remotely close to revealing any sort of information about himself, he immediately covers it up. any time he appears even a little vulnerable, even a little human, he immediately backs it up with something that makes you doubt the momentary sympathy you had in him. it's difficult to tell whether his actions are because he has severe mental and emotional scars, or because he just is that way. his repeated and emphasized dehumanization of himself makes you second guess yourself, which means he becomes harder to understand. it's quite meta, because this must be what shin felt. you think you can understand him, an opening appears, only to instantly disappear because he simply wont allow himself to exist, evident from shin's dialog in his flashback. is he a sympathetic character? or is he just really, truly evil, plain and simple? it's near impossible to know. then you start to withdraw. and that's exactly how he keeps people at arm's length.
I'd die without Matthias Czernin
nah imagine world without Matthias Czernin 🤣🤣😂