This.

let’s talk about a ptsd thing that’s called sense of foreshortened future. i don’t see anyone ever talking about it here and i think that it’s important that people know that what they experience is nothing but another symptom of their mental illness.

So what is it?

Basically, sense of foreshortened future is a feeling or a belief that for some reason you won’t have a long and fullfilling life. You feel like you will die soon – or sooner than expected – and therefore you shouldn’t make any long-term plans. You try to avoid long-term relationships, you don’t have any career plans, reaching your birthday - hell, sometimes even managing to surivive the week surprises you. 

You feel like you’ll never have a normal life because you’re not only broken beyond repair but also can’t trust anyone anymore. It is an incredibly depressing feeling that makes you feel like there’s no point in… anything, really? Every activity becomes dull and pointless and you don’t know what drags you though life at this point.

I know it won;t make the feeling go away but I want you to know that this feeling is NOT a reflection of reality. You’re not broken beyond repair and you will have a normal happy life if you work on your recovery. making plans is not pointless. You deserve to be happy and you will be happy. Don’t let PTSD and its symptoms convince you otherwise.

I can’t let a boy have so much control over my emotions and mood

Fuck, i’m so pathetic

I relapsed a few days back. I've been crying for weeks I can't take it anymore. It's so damn hard. It's like I'm in peices and a shredder is shredding them.

I couldn’t not share this…

I love my scars, they are part of me and my story, they are proof that I survived although it was not easy. I still have demons within me, but I hope there will come a time when I will be happy and free from it all. I'm not ashamed of my scars, I don't hide them, neither should you all either because everyone has a story they've struggled with, but it's proof that we're still here after that all. It is not others business and fuck their looks or comments.

Sorry I haven’t been active in a while🖤

I wish it was that easy💔

“No one has realized how unhappy I am…they haven’t noticed the dark inside my eyes”

- the suicide effect