SEASONS IN LOVE (PART II)
SEASONS IN LOVE (PART II)
Sanemi x F!Reader (modern college AU)
Sanemi meets Y/N in January and isn't a fan. As the seasons pass by, their evolving relationship becomes defined by a handful snapshots from the various holidays throughout the year.
CW: modern college AU • 6.6k words • tooth-rotting fluff • college typical drinking and debauchery • some mildly suggestive content • Sanemi is a massive simp
PART ONE HERE
December 24th – Christmas Eve.
Sanemi was hunched over, back turned against the icy wind that threatened to shred through the layers of his coat and sweater, as he waited for someone to answer the door.
A few weeks ago, he would’ve said to anyone that he hadn’t minded the snow — after all, the snow is what led to Y/N smiling — at him, no less — for the first time since he’d met her, and that memory had been more that enough to keep him warm through the fall of every snowflake coating the earth.
He took it all back. Y/N’s smile was a damn pretty sight, but absolutely nothing could insulate him against the near sub-arctic winds that cut through him like a knife as he shifted impatiently from foot to foot on the Kanroji’s front porch.
“God dammit, Mitsuri,” he growled. He unwound a stiff arm from where it’d been tightly tucked against his chest, prepared to start pounding against the oak of her parents’ front door, when the pink party host threw it open, her smile bright and cheerful and warm in a way that Sanemi was not.
“It’s about time!” She chirped, standing aside to let her scowling friend through and into the front entryway of her home.
Mitsuri held her hand out as she waited for Sanemi to pass her his coat. “Everyone else is here already — help yourself to any snacks you want.” Mitsuri snatched the gift-wrapped package lodged under his arm before he could say anything. “I’ll take this,” she waved it, nose crinkling with amusement at Sanemi’s indignant glare. “And I’ll put it with the others!”
Before he could respond, his pink-haired friend traipsed away back to the open floor plan of her living room and kitchen, leaving Sanemi to brush the snowflakes that had gathered on his trousers and remove his boots and leave them with the others’ scattered by the closet of Mitsuri’s parents’ home.
Every year, the bubbly and exuberant pinkette hosted a Christmas Eve for her friends at her parents’ complete with an absurd array of holiday-themed snacks, games, and Secret Santa.
In years past, Sanemi only ever deigned to show up as a courtesy to his friend, eagerly awaiting the day when he could blame needing to take care of his siblings on Christmas Eve as an excuse not to go. After his family had been killed, however, Sanemi had begun spending the Christmas holidays with Kyojuro’s family, along with Tengen, and so, he’d been forced to continue the tradition, given the enthusiasm his flame-haired best friend had for the over-the-top celebration.
This year, however, was Y/N’s first time attending Mitsuri’s annual fete; and curiously, Sanemi found himself growing more and more excited as the time for the celebration drew nearer.
That excitement only bubbled in his gut as he padded towards the Kanroji’s packed living room, eyes scanning for the sight of the one he was most eager — and anxious — to see.
Y/N spotted him from her position on one of the overstuffed leather armrests by the fireplace and shot out of her seat, nearly toppling Shinobu in the process.
“You made it!” Her smile was blazing, a now permanent fixture on her face that Sanemi found himself sneaking furtive glances at throughout the day, afraid that he would miss it.
“Wait,” Y/N stopped an arm’s length from him as she ran her eyes over his form. “Are we matching?”
Sanemi looked down at the outfit he had thrown on (carefully selected) prior to leaving his apartment and back to the amused woman before him. She was dressed in a black turtleneck sweater, tucked into a pair of belted, vintage, loose jeans that she had cuffed to show her festive Christmas socks.
“Just the turtleneck. I don’t do jeans.” Sanemi snorted, flicking her nose affectionately.
Y/N, however, looked better than he. Her hair was loosely secured with a clip at her neck, and she wore no accessories save for a pair of oversized gold framed glasses that she claimed were to help with blue light strains, but Sanemi was convinced she just liked wearing them for fun.
He tried very hard not to stare too long at her full lips — painted a bright, festive red that Sanemi found he really liked.
“I should’ve brought my lipstick along, then we could’ve really twinned,” Y/N’s eyes were alight with her mirth as she teased him.
Had Sanemi been a tad bolder, he would’ve cheekily suggested another way he could get her lipstick on his mouth, but he wasn’t, so all he could do was grumble, a faint red staining his cheeks.
Mitsuri clapped loudly over the chattering group. “Friends! Dearly beloveds! Snacks are over there,” she pointed to a long table packed heavy with various holiday goodies. “And the hot chocolate bar is open! Get a snack and get settled before secret Santa!”
“When you say ‘bar,’ ‘Suri,” Tengen prodded.
The pinkette nodded solemnly. “Yes, you can make spiked hot chocolate, Tengen.”
The flashy, silver-haired man let out a whoop for joy as he made a beeline for the hot chocolate bar carefully organized by their pink-haired host. Before long, Tengen had blessed each of their drinks with a healthy splash of Irish cream, though Sanemi suspected the loudmouth’s own mug was nothing but the festive liquor.
“Nope,” Sanemi fought to keep the grimace off his face as he took a swig of his hot chocolate, the bitter burn of alcohol making him pucker. “Giyuu, drink this — it’s plain.”
The quiet, raven-haired man gratefully accepted the steaming mug from his friend and took a hearty gulp of it, frowning slightly when he realized Sanemi had indeed given him his own spiked drink.
Sanemi pretended to look affronted at Giyuu’s accusatory stare. “What? I thought you’d need it — aren’t you going home to Kocho’s after this?”
Giyuu considered Sanemi’s words for a moment before tipping his head back and swallowing the remainder of the mug’s contents.
Y/N came prancing over from the kitchen, her own mug of hot chocolate cupped between her hands, to where Sanemi now sat on the large sofa, but before she could sit down, Gyomei plopped down, nearly crushing her in the process.
“Apologies, Y/N,” the gentle giant said upon hearing Y/N’s squeak. “I didn’t realize you wanted to sit beside Sanemi.”
If Sanemi hadn’t known better, he would’ve sworn that was a blush spreading across her cheeks. “No worries!” She chirped, twisting around awkwardly to find a new spot.
Sanemi grimaced. He was about to tell her to sit on the arm rest of the sofa next to him, but Shinobu called her over first, the two girls squeezing into a single-person armchair, as Shinobu threw her legs over Y/N’s lap to make room.
Secret Santa proceeded without much fuss. Sanemi was happy to receive a box of high-quality matcha from his anonymous gift-giver, though Shinobu’s lack of a poker face gave away who’d gifted it. Sanemi winked at his tiny friend, clutching the tea box tightly to his chest.
Y/N was practically buzzing with excitement. Mitsuri had hardly discerned the name scrawled on the tag of her giftbox before she’d lunged forward, nearly toppling Shinobu out of her lap.
“My turn!” The expression on Y/N’s face was that of a greedy child’s as she wriggled her fingers demandingly at Mitsuri in anticipation of her present.
The pinkette dropped the heavy box into her friend’s eager hands, Y/N giving a small oomph! against the weight of the gift.
Sanemi watched his best friend tear into her present with vigor, similar to the way a hyena tore into its prey, tufts of wrapping paper floating down beside her as she beheld the grocery store box within.
“What the—?” Y/N’s eyebrows were drawn together as she turned the container over in her hands, eyes squinting as she read the label printed on the cardboard.
“No fucking way,” Her eyes blew wide as she held the box closer to her face in disbelief. “No fucking way!”
Y/N’s laugh bordered on maniacal as she clapped her hands, ripping into the cardboard as she produced one, fat candy bar, wrapped in unfamiliar purple foil.
“My chocolate!” She crowed, dumping the contents of the box out onto her lap. A dozen large, heavy candy bars thudded to the floor, the packaging on each bearing some foreign language and description. “I can’t believe my Secret Santa found them!”
Sanemi smirked quietly to himself. Sure, he’d rigged the Secret Santa pool to ensure that he magically drew Y/N’s name from the hat full of paper Mitsuri had passed around at their weekly dinner a few weeks prior, but he’d only done it because he’d already ordered Y/N’s Christmas gift from overseas.
For ages, she’d not shut up about a particular kind of chocolate that she’d had while abroad with her family one summer. Y/N had moaned to everyone that chocolate at home just didn’t taste the same, and she longed to have just one more taste of the candy she’d come to love while on holiday, though she hadn’t been able to track it down online.
But Sanemi had; he’d found a website that put him in contact with a local, who then used his bank information to clear out an entire grocery store’s supply of the confectionary. It was risky, but he was a man in love, so what else could he do but chance it?
“Over my dead fucking body —“ Y/N threatened, as Mitsuri tried to snatch a bar from her hand.
As Sanemi sat there, smugly sipping his non-spiked hot chocolate, he mused that the look of pure glee on Y/N’s face was well worth his account getting hacked not even a week after his order arrived.
—————————————————————————
The Christmas Eve party continued until the late afternoon, at which point the group of friends began to help their host clean up the discarded snacks and empty mugs of hot chocolate before each of them set off for their respective homes for the night.
Y/N was the only one in their group who had to take a train back to her parents’, her hometown being over three hours away from campus, and so, she was the first who had to leave the merry fete.
Sanemi had offered to drive Y/N the forty-minute trip to the train station so she wouldn’t be stuck paying for an Uber, and truthfully, he was glad to have nearly an hour of uninterrupted time with her before she went home for the week.
“Ready?” He asked her as he looped his wool scarf over his head, bracing himself to be smacked in the face by the icy wind that howled outside the warmth of the Kanroji house.
Y/N finished tugging on a pair of gloves before sliding into her emerald green wool coat. “One sec!”
Y/N darted back to the living room where their other friends exchanged goodbyes and flung her arms around her pink-haired best friend’s neck.
From where he stood near the Kanroji doorway, Sanemi could see the pinkette whisper a few words of encouragement into Y/N’s ear, her face uncharacteristically serious as she squeezed her best friend one more time. Sanemi knew that Mitsuri had been comforting Y/N leading up to her first holiday season at home since her brother died, and he felt a rush of gratitude for the girl as he saw Y/N’s shoulders visibly relax under the warmth of her words.
Y/N returned, her eyes sparkling with unshed emotion that she quickly tried to wipe with her gloved hands. “I’m ready!” She said thickly, plastering a smile on her face.
Sanemi sighed, but slung an arm around her shoulders, pulling her tightly into his side before releasing her. Y/N nodded in gratitude, sniffing once, before wrenching the front door of the Kanroji house open, allowing the icy winds beyond to whip across their faces.
The drive to the train station was uneventful, though Y/N had been sure to provide him with “entertainment” by singing loudly, off-key, to every Christmas song that crackled over the ancient speakers in Sanemi’s beat-up station wagon.
He wouldn’t have traded the smile emblazoned in her face, nor the sound of her raucous laughter, for the world however, not even for the sake of his ringing eardrums.
The duo parked and Sanemi heaved her suitcase out of his trunk. As they made their way towards the train platform, Sanemi fought the urge to take her hand in his, as the snowflakes swirled around them.
“So, how did you find it?” Y/N asked after a moment, her train turning the corner into the station right on time, slowing in the distance as it prepared to stop.
Her snowy-haired friend played dumb. “Find what, exactly?”
She gave him a sly smile. “Sanemi. You’re the only one who would’ve paid attention to me when I complained about some foreign chocolate that you can’t get anywhere but that country. Of course, it was you.”
Sanemi gave her a wry grin. “My credit card may’ve been hacked, but it was worth it. Got ya the whole store shelf, didn’t I?” He nudged her elbow playfully with his own and she giggled.
He would never tire of hearing that sound.
Y/N’s train slowed into the station terminal, and she sighed, parking her small suitcase next to her as she stepped forward and threw her arms around his shoulders.
“Merry Christmas, Sanemi.” She whispered, squeezing him gently.
It would’ve been nice to say it back — to say anything at all, but Sanemi found himself unable to make a sound, a hand only able to come up and awkwardly pat her back just as she pulled away. Whether or not his awkwardness affected her, Y/N didn’t show, for she only gave him one more radiant smile before boarding her train home.
“See you at the cabin!” She said brightly, stepping through the double doors, suitcase in hand.
Sanemi was still standing on the platform in bemusement at his inability to say or do other than stare at her, as though his brain had become nothing but a smooth rock rattling around inside his skull.
Y/N turned to wave at him, the doors to the train still open for the last few stragglers to board, but her smile slid from her face as she beheld him, staring at her with a fiery intensity.
What’s wrong-“ she started.
“I’m in love with you.” He said breathlessly, and to his horror, she froze, her mouth parting and her eyes going wide.
“What?”
But Sanemi could not answer her; he could not even make his traitorous mouth work as the doors slid shut and the train began its slow pull out of the terminal.
Y/N stood there, just past the doors, staring at him with that same, stunned expression until the train car rounded a corner and pulled her from sight.
————————————————————————-
More than an hour later, Sanemi arrived at the Rengoku family home where he was to spend Christmas Eve and the following morning. He kicked his boots off inside the festively decorated entryway, greeted Kyojuro’s parents, and stomped downstairs to the furnished basement where he knew his two friends would be gathered.
Tengen and Kyojuro were sprawled across the plush L-shaped sofa, both silent as they huddled over former’s phone as they listened to whomever was on the other end.
Kyojuro saw Sanemi first and smacked Tengen on the shoulder, the latter looking up as both his friends went wide-eyed.
“Obanai — hold on, he just got here.” Tengen muttered.
“What?” Sanemi demanded, a heat creeping up the side of his neck as his friends stared at him, mouths open.
Tengen pointed at his phone. “Obanai’s on. Apparently Y/N has been talking the girls for the last hour and a half because someone —“ he narrowed his eyes at Sanemi. “Decided to tell her they were in love with her right as her train was leaving?”
Sanemi wondered, briefly, whether it was possible for one’s stomach to fall out of their ass.
“Are you stupid?” Tengen asked, and Sanemi resented the fact he’d almost sounded serious.
“Put Obanai on speaker,” Sanemi muttered, flinging himself down on the sofa next to Kyojuro.
Tengen rolled his eyes but did as Sanemi asked. In the background, Sanemi could hear a faint, shrill voice ranting, and he felt his gut clench. Mitsuri.
“-and now, it’s Christmas Eve and instead of spending it with our girlfriends, Giyuu and I are playing chess for the third fucking time, because that’s how long the girls have been on the phone with Y/N.” Obanai drawled. “Not that it hasn’t been entertaining — ‘Suri is convinced Y/N should’ve pushed you onto the tracks, Shinazugawa.”
Sanemi grit his teeth. “What did Y/N say, Obanai?”
His friend muttered something under his breath that sounded like an insult, but Sanemi said nothing, waiting as he heard Obanai’s voice grow smaller as he left the phone in favor of approaching the girls.
Sanemi’s stomach dipped at the renewed sound of indignant screeching that crackled through the phone, Tengen and Kyojuro snickering.
“Fine, alright, okay, stop yelling,” Obanai’s reedy and exasperated voice grew louder as he neared the phone again, though Sanemi could still hear the muffled sounds of Mitsuri squawking in the background.
“Mitsuri said you’re gonna have to man up and talk to Y/N yourself,” Obanai relayed, a hint of amusement lacing his tone. “And Shinobu said she doesn’t care enough about you to break girl code.”
Sanemi groaned, throwing an arm over his face as he leaned back into the sofa cushions, wishing he’d saved Y/N the trouble, and jumped in front of her oncoming train himself.
“How do I unfuck this?” He intoned to no one in particular, lifting the arm over his eyes to squint at his two friends as they continued to suppress their shit-eating smirks.
“You could try texting her,” Kyojuro offered, though Tengen shook his head in disagreement.
“You can’t just send a text right after confessing your undying love for her as her train was leaving,” the flamboyant man chided, clicking his phone off and kicking his feet up on the coffee table before him. “That’s like begging her to curse your ass out.”
Sanemi grumbled but he knew Tengen was right; whatever conversation he would have with Y/N would have to be in-person. She deserved that much, at least.
Tengen leaned back against the sofa, twiddling the toothpick wedged between his teeth, eyes narrowed at Sanemi in contemplation. “I thought you two hooked up back over the summer?”
Sanemi snorted, shaking his head, as Kyojuro quipped, “You’re thinking of Obanai and Kanroji.”
Their silver-haired friend looked back to Sanemi, eyebrow raising in incredulity. “You’re telling me, all this time, you two’ve been making eyes at one another and you haven’t been fucking?”
“Watch it,” Sanemi bristled, and Tengen held his hands up in surrender.
“Jesus you move slow,” he mumbled, and Sanemi chucked one of the decorative pillows lying next to him at his head, Tengen effortlessly batting the projectile away. “Is she coming to the cabin next week?”
He was referring to the spacious cabin their group had rented up in the snowy mountains to celebrate New Year’s Eve together, wanting a place large enough to accommodate them all, yet secluded enough that they wouldn’t cause too much harm when one of them inevitably set a tree on fire while drunkenly trying to set off fireworks.
Sanemi nodded, and Tengen’s smile turned smug. “Then I guess you’ll have to wait ‘til then to find out what she thinks.”
—————————————————————————
December 31st – New Year’s Eve
Sanemi Shinazugawa had never experienced torture, but the seven-day stretch between Christmas Eve and New Year's Eve was about as close as he’d thought he’d ever get.
By the time he, Tengen, and Kyojuro had loaded up his station wagon with their duffel bags and enough booze to open their own traveling liquor store, Sanemi thought the anxious buzz in his blood would make him jump out of his skin.
He’d not spoken to Y/N since saying goodbye to her at the train station — not really. He’d responded to her Merry Christmas! text in their larger group chat with his own holiday well-wishes, and she’d simply reacted to the message. Otherwise, his phone had remained remarkably silent, without so much as a meme from the woman who held his heart.
He knew that he couldn’t assume her silence meant the worst, even as his brain tried to convince him it was all it meant. After all, Y/N was experiencing her first holiday season without her brother, and Sanemi knew the emotions of such a milestone were far more likely to hold her attention than his pitiful love confession.
He felt nearly sick by the time he pulled into the circular driveway of the enormous log cabin, seated up the hill and a way back from the main road, surrounded only by an endless stretch of snow-covered trees and forest. As he helped Kyojuro unload the cases of beer and bottles of champagne from his trunk, Sanemi spied Mitsuri’s pink Volkswagen parked at the other end of the driveway, next to Gyomei’s Hummer.
Sanemi’s stomach flipped as Tengen unlocked the back door of the cabin, loudly calling out to their friends in greeting in that booming voice of his. Giyuu and Mitsuri leaned over the bannister of the staircase leading to the second floor, waving as the remainder of the friend group straggled through the door, stomping shoes against the welcome mat to clear themselves of any lingering snow.
Sanemi’s eyes met Mitsuri’s and the pinkette’s narrowed, as she promptly turned away from him with a pointed harrumph.
Kyojuro snorted as Sanemi sighed, and they heaved the case of beer they’d brought into the kitchen and on the counter.
It was going to be a long day.
—————————————————————————
Y/N emerged from the room she was sharing with Shinobu and Mitsuri not long after he’d arrived, decked out in some sparkly get-up of Mitsuri’s that was more suited to wearing out at the club than it was for staying in, though Sanemi wasn’t about to complain.
She’d cheerfully greeted every one of their friends with hugs and her smiles until she came to him. Thankfully, Y/N was far less awkward than he, and she’d only hesitated for a moment before giving him a hug that Sanemi found did not last nearly long enough.
As the group settled in with their drinks and grazed at the smorgasbord of food and snacks laid out in the kitchen, Sanemi caught sight of Y/N watching him, eyes expectant. He tried to muster the courage to approach her, to ask her if they could talk in private, but Sanemi balked at the weight of both Tengen and Mitsuri’s knowing stares as they flicked back and forth between himself and Y/N.
He couldn’t do this with an audience; he could only hope that Y/N would understand.
Yet, Y/N looked slightly hurt at the way Sanemi turned and struck up a conversation with Obanai and Gyomei, and Sanemi could feel at least one pair of eyes hurling daggers into his back as he remained turned away, no doubt from Y/N’s pink, livid best friend.
This was going to be damn near impossible, and yet, it was entirely his fault to begin with, as he’d been the one to stupidly blurt out that he loved Y/N to her without properly preparing himself for the moment; and now, it was his situation to un-fuck.
Somehow.
And so, Sanemi merely opened another beer and took a hearty swig of its contents, hoping to gain the liquid courage he’d need to finally confront her head-on.
—————————————————————————
Sanemi had downed two flutes of champagne since the sun had set and he still found himself jittery and uneasy as he continued to dodge Y/N’s pleading looks.
He felt like an asshole, especially right then, as the year wound down to its last half hour. Sanemi was standing in the kitchen alone, turning over a bottle of champagne in his hands as he debated taking it along with him when he went to find Y/N, and work things out between them. Perhaps they could open it in celebration if it turned out that she returned his feelings; if not, he could always drown his sorrows in the bubbly.
“If you don’t grow a pair and talk to Y/N, I’m making out with her at midnight,” Shinobu threatened, brushing by Sanemi to grab another bottle of cheap champagne to uncork. “Right in front of you.”
Sanemi shot her a shit-eating smirk. “Don’t think your boyfriend would be a fan of that idea,” he challenged, grabbing the opened bottle from Shinobu’s hand and pouring himself another glass of sparkling wine.
“I support it,” Giyuu called out from the living room, much to his girlfriend’s satisfaction and Sanemi’s irritation.
Shinobu tossed her hair over her shoulder and turned sharply away from him on her heel. “I rest my case.”
At that, Shinobu departed with a shrill reminder for him to man up! and Sanemi was left alone in the kitchen once more. With a deep inhale, Sanemi lifted his champagne flute to his lips and tipped back its contents, swallowing his champagne in a single wet gulp, before setting the glass back in the counter, and wiping his lips with the back of his hand.
He set out to find Y/N.
—————————————————————————
He found her outside, leaning up against the side of the cabin as she nursed her own flute of champagne, as she stared past the line of trees where their friends had begun assembling the various rockets and fireworks they’d gathered to mark the start of the new year.
Sanemi felt his tongue go thick at the sight of her, so pretty in the snow, though he didn’t know how she wasn’t shivering; she didn’t even have on a coat, and the only thing on her legs was a thin pair of nylons and her platform boots she insisted made her “nearly” as tall as him.
He joined her in leaning against the cabin on the opposite wall of her, though she did not acknowledge his presence past a small inclination of her head, her gaze instead falling to the glass clutched between her hands.
The silence stretched endlessly between them, making him shift his weight from leg to leg as he squirmed.
“Where’s that pretty smile o’ yours?” Sanemi finally broke, and Y/N looked up at him, a frown pulling her painted lips into an adorable pout.
He may have been a tad buzzed from the champagne, but his head felt clear, and his heart felt full as he looked towards his beautiful best friend, so very underdressed for the single-digit weather and snow in that sparkly two-piece Mitsuri had insisted she wear, even though it was just them at the cabin, celebrating.
“Back at the train station,” she mumbled after a moment, returning to her own champagne flute, swirling the liquid around.
Sanemi felt his gut sour, and he found his tongue incapable of forming any words, much to his embarrassment.
Neither said anything for a moment, the distant echoes of their friends cheering as they set up the fireworks magnified against the snowy backdrop of their mountain retreat.
“Why’re you avoiding me?” Y/N’s voice was so small, so unsure that Sanemi felt his heart ache because he hated that he’d been the cause of her doubt.
“I mean, how can you tell me that — what you said, a week ago, and now you can barely meet my eyes?”
“Y/N-“ Sanemi sighed, but Y/N cut him off once more.
“I understand if you didn’t mean it; I get it’s easy to get caught up in the moment, but just tell me that.” She pled.
Sanemi exhaled sharply and ran a hand through his hair. “I guess I was worried about your reaction,” he confessed after a moment, and Y/N’s frown deepened.
“I was also pissed at myself for doin’ it that way — I had a whole plan, I was gonna take you out somewhere nice, like you deserve, but, well,” Sanemi trailed off, awkwardly. “You just looked so happy at the Christmas party, and then you hugged me, and I guess I went a bit stupid.”
Y/N was silent, only staring at him with wide eyes, her champagne flute dangling precariously from her loose hand as she gaped at him.
“Y-you meant it? You really meant it?” She breathed.
Sanemi looked to her and rolled his eyes. “Yeah,” he answered, as though it was the most obvious thing in the world.
“I’ve been waiting…a long time, to hear you say that.” Y/N admitted, a tentative grin spreading across her face.
Sanemi met her smile with his own, and he began to advance slowly towards where she leaned against the cabin wall. “Sorry to make you wait, princess.”
Y/N responded with an airy laugh. “I expected I would have to break the ice,” her heart thundered against her sternum as Sanemi boxed her in against the logs with his arms. “I’ve been openly flirting with you since the snowball fight.”
Sanemi snorted. “And I’ve been putty in your hands since Halloween. Probably longer.” His hand rose to rest on the small, exposed sliver of her waist and Y/N shuddered at how warm his touch was.
“You sure know how to keep a girl waiting, then.” Y/N’s eyes narrowed in on the proximity of Sanemi’s lips to hers. Though felt the warmth of his breath caress her face, he maintained just enough distance between their lips to tease her.
“Jesus, you’re freezing,” Sanemi murmured, his thumb stroking the small patch of exposed skin above her hip.
Y/N smirked. “Then warm me up.”
Somewhere beyond the trees that dotted the property, Sanemi and Y/N’s friends began the countdown to midnight; but the two of them did not react to the impending new year, instead only holding one another’s gaze, steadily in the snow.
Their faces were titled towards one another, both still teasingly withholding the satisfaction of being the first to close the marginal distance between their lips from another. But in the distance, Sanemi vaguely heard his friends cry “ONE,” and so, right as the New Year arrived, he finally gave in, and he slanted his mouth over Y/N’s.
Later, Sanemi would muse over the fact that that had been the second time he’d missed a fireworks show with his friends, but he would not be able to care.
Because no display of colored sparks in the sky could compare to the feeling of Y/N’s lips moving fervently against his; could not compare to the way her fingers buried in his hair, or how she felt beneath his palms as he pressed her against the cabin wall and kissed her for all she was worth.
When they finally broke apart, the winter night had fallen silent once more, but it did not remain so; in an instant, their friends erupted into applause, with Tengen letting out a very loud Finally!
Y/N laughed and wrapped her hand around the collar of Sanemi’s jacket, hauling his mouth back to hers. As their friends made suggestive oohs, both Sanemi and Y/N stretched their hands out and simultaneously flipped the group off.
“It’s about damn time, you two,” Tengen drawled as the group made their way inside the warmth of the cabin.
“If you find a rocket in your bed tonight, Tengen, I want you to know it was me.” Sanemi replied smoothly, not taking his eyes off Y/N as she blushed under the hand he kept on her cheek.
—-———————————————————————
It was after two in the morning, and most of the revelers had finally drifted off to bed, drunk and happy and partied out. Only two couples remained awake, not quite yet ready to let the sparkling night fade to black.
One couple was seated on the ornate leather couch before the cabin’s lit Christmas tree, talking and giggling softly to themselves. Mitsuri stifled a sleepy yawn behind her hand, settling in against Obanai’s side as her eyelids drooped.
The ebony-haired man smiled to himself as Mitsuri’s breathing slowed, the beautiful girl finally nodding off against him as the excitement of the weekend lured her to sleep. Slowly, so as not to disturb his girlfriend’s peaceful rest, Obanai turned his head to watch the other couple still awake, though they were in the adjacent reading room.
There, standing before the large bay window of the cabin, Sanemi slow-danced with Y/N as the sound of some old holiday song crackled through the old record player of the cabin’s study. Y/N’s back was to Obanai, but her head was resting against his friend’s chest as Sanemi rocked them from side to side, his lips pressed against the girl’s hair. After a moment, Sanemi bent to murmur something in her ear, and Y/N drew back from his chest and nodded, causing his grin to spread wide across his face.
Obanai turned away from the sight of his friends, a small smile creeping onto his face, as Sanemi led his new girlfriend to his room.
—————————————————————————
Everyone was slow to rise later on New Year's Day, in no short part due to the previous night’s indulgences.
The last to rise, however, was the friend group’s newest couple, and it was with no small amount of delight that the friends saw Y/N emerge from Sanemi’s room, dressed in his sweater from the night before and a pair of men’s briefs. She padded into the kitchen, happy to accept the steaming mug of coffee that Shinobu handed her with a knowing smirk, while flipping off Tengen as he’d loudly asked her if she’d enjoyed her night.
When Sanemi finally entered the kitchen, a dark purple bruise seared into the side of his neck, the whole gang erupted into applause, much to the couple’s laughter and slight embarrassment.
Mitsuri sidled up to her best friend, nudging her with her shoulder. “Shinobu and I had a bet as to who would show up this morning with hickies. She owes me $5.”
Y/N’s returning smirk was naughty as she brought the steaming mug of coffee to her lips. “You just can’t see mine.”
Mitsuri giggled and Y/N couldn’t help but join her, feeling too warm and happy as her eyes met her now-boyfriend’s while he watched her from across the counter. As she’d swiped a donut from one of the several boxes scattered around the table, Y/N felt Sanemi’s fingers shyly brush against her own, and the pair exchanged small, sweet smiles before resuming conversation with their respective roommates.
Later, as the group loaded up cars with their luggage in a haphazard game of suitcase Tetris, Sanemi caught Y/N’s eye again and winked, prompting the latter to blush.
As they piled into their cars and drove away from the cabin, Sanemi realized he was the luckiest man in the world.
—————————————————————————
Epilogue — New Year’s Day, 2 years later
“He just texted me — they’re walking up,” Kyojuro whispered, and the group dissolved into renewed giggles and excitement as the snow drifted lazily outside.
“Shush!” Shinobu urged over the tittering group, as they all crouched in the dark, excitement buzzing among the friend group as they waited anxiously in Sanemi and Y/N’s apartment.
Mitsuri rocked on her heels beside Shinobu, squatting behind the couple’s sofa, her hands fluttering in glee. “They need to hurry up! I can hardly wait!”
“They’re almost — shut it!” Shinobu hissed at the unmistakable sound of a key entering a lock on the front door.
There was a wash of light from the apartment hallway as the door swung open, and Shinobu and the others burrowed deeper into their hiding spots. Only as the door clicked shut, and Sanemi flipped the light switch to their living room, did the group erupt.
“CONGRATULATIONS!” Every one of them — Mitsuri, Obanai, Shinobu, Tengen, Gyomei, Kyojuro and even Giyuu sprung from their various crouching spaces behind furniture and closets as they greeted the newly engaged couple.
Y/N’s hands flew to her face in surprise and joy, her cheeks bright red as she laughed. On her left hand, a beautiful, emerald ring sparkled.
The blushing bride-to-be turned to her fiancé and smacked him lightly on the chest. “You ass! Is this why you’ve been so weird and secretive over the last few weeks?”
Sanemi caught his fiancé’s hand and brought it to his lips, prompting the young woman to flush even further. Before she could return the gesture, Y/N was nearly knocked over by the flurry of pink and green that hurtled toward her, locking her arms around her neck and sobbing with joy.
“He was afraid he was gonna blow it,” Tengen offered, though he flinched at the sharp glare the scarred man shot his way. “Okay fine — he thought we would blow it.”
“I can’t imagine why he’d be concerned,” Y/N shook her head in mock-solemnity over Mitsuri’s shoulder. “After all, Giyuu did spoil Gyomei’s 22nd birthday.”
Giyuu made some sound of indignation as the tips of his ears reddened. Kyojuro thumped Sanemi on the back in congratulations. “I still think it would have been much nicer to have us all there when you finally popped the question, Shinazugawa!”
Sanemi rolled his eyes. “Like hell was I gonna let you shitheads ruin a romantic moment.”
Mitsuri, who’d not yet unwound her arms from Y/N’s neck, leaned in close to her best friend’s ear. “Did he cry?” She whispered conspiratorially.
Y/N’s grin widened. “Like a baby. He got down on one knee and started blubbering.”
It might have been a slight exaggeration — though her snowy-haired lover had gone misty-eyed as he’d knelt before her in front of the large Christmas tree in the city square and poured his heart out. As he pulled her in tight against him after sliding the delicate ring on her finger, Y/N had felt the wet droplets of his joyous tears as he’d buried his face into the side of her neck.
But Y/N couldn’t resist the chance to make it known amongst their friends that Sanemi Shinazugawa had the softest heart out of any of them.
The pair of best friends dissolved into giggles, before Mitsuri pulled away and the two hummed and hah’ed over Y/N’s engagement ring, Shinobu joining in as they marveled over the way the emerald shone.
Beside them, both Obanai and Giyuu looked accusingly at their smug friend. “Neither of them are gonna shut up about the ring now. Thanks, Shinazugawa.” Obanai grumbled.
Sanemi locked an arm around his friend’s neck and ground his knuckles into the top of his head. “Please. Like you don’t have a Pinterest board titled ‘future wedding’ for when you decide to have the balls to ask ‘Suri to marry you.” He grinned. “I’ve seen your phone, dude.”
“Jackass,” Obanai mumbled, though any ire he felt towards the snowy-haired man was quick to dissipate, because he couldn’t remember the last time Sanemi had smiled as broadly as he did right then.
He was happy — really, and truly happy.
Because Sanemi Shinazugawa loved many things.
He loved Saturday mornings, when there was no alarm or no obligations, and he could just exist peacefully in his bed with his woman wrapped snug in his arms. He loved when his phone had zero notifications, because that meant he was being left the fuck alone, and in peace.
He loved his friends, that wonderful group of people whom he’d known for most of his life, who’d always supported him or provided a good kick in his ass whenever he needed it.
But most of all, Sanemi loved New Year’s Day, and the snow, because it had brought him Y/N — his fiancé, and the great love of his life, and all her smiles that he had to look forward to every day, for all the days to come.
More Posts from Xdncrkay and Others
WEBSITES FOR WRITERS {masterpost}
E.A. Deverell - FREE worksheets (characters, world building, narrator, etc.) and paid courses;
Hiveword - Helps to research any topic to write about (has other resources, too);
BetaBooks - Share your draft with your beta reader (can be more than one), and see where they stopped reading, their comments, etc.;
Charlotte Dillon - Research links;
Writing realistic injuries - The title is pretty self-explanatory: while writing about an injury, take a look at this useful website;
One Stop for Writers - You guys... this website has literally everything we need: a) Description thesaurus collection, b) Character builder, c) Story maps, d) Scene maps & timelines, e) World building surveys, f) Worksheets, f) Tutorials, and much more! Although it has a paid plan ($90/year | $50/6 months | $9/month), you can still get a 2-week FREE trial;
One Stop for Writers Roadmap - It has many tips for you, divided into three different topics: a) How to plan a story, b) How to write a story, c) How to revise a story. The best thing about this? It's FREE!
Story Structure Database - The Story Structure Database is an archive of books and movies, recording all their major plot points;
National Centre for Writing - FREE worksheets and writing courses. Has also paid courses;
Penguin Random House - Has some writing contests and great opportunities;
Crime Reads - Get inspired before writing a crime scene;
The Creative Academy for Writers - "Writers helping writers along every step of the path to publication." It's FREE and has ZOOM writing rooms;
Reedsy - "A trusted place to learn how to successfully publish your book" It has many tips, and tools (generators), contests, prompts lists, etc. FREE;
QueryTracker - Find agents for your books (personally, I've never used this before, but I thought I should feature it here);
Pacemaker - Track your goals (example: Write 50K words - then, everytime you write, you track the number of the words, and it will make a graphic for you with your progress). It's FREE but has a paid plan;
Save the Cat! - The blog of the most known storytelling method. You can find posts, sheets, a software (student discount - 70%), and other things;
I hope this is helpful for you!
(Also, check my blog if you want to!)
angsty romance prompts :
(feel free to use<3 credits are appreciated, tag me when you write 2nd, 3rd, 5th and 10th oneee! )
"was all this just a joke to you?"
reaching out to them, but finding them happy in the presence of somebody else, and thinking, maybe you're the only one suffering
"Why didn't you.. tell me?" "I-I.. I t-tried-"
"i don't want to get my hopes up, thinking that we'll ever be together someday..."
"None of that mattered to me. You hear me? None of it mattered, when all I saw was--- you." they pause, wiping a tear furiously. "Nothing mattered to me, but you."
"Please don't cry"
"are you crying?"
"shh , it's fine now, my love."
"stay. please"
"why don't you come here for a sec, love?" you look at them, who is shamelessly smiling with their arms open. you laugh through your tears, "you're so annoying."
"Stop telling me you're okay."
"tonight is all about you."
"magically, i feel fine when I'm with you."
"let's talk about how you've been, love."
"i just want to see you."
"i missed you." engulfing them in a bear hug. the night so quiet and the sky as clear as the crystals, slightly sniffing tears back cause it finally--feels like home.
Ardyn’s friends teaching him the life skills that made him the savior of his people: Benevolo Besithia.
Ben: “Okay, Ardyn. Today we have a very special lesson. Today, you are going to earn the trust of a majestic creature. Doing so will increase survivability when dealing with wild beasts as we’re adventuring across Eos.”
Ardyn: “Sounds simple enough. But why at a volcano?”
Ben: “It’s where she makes her nest. Now, the important part here is to not flinch.”
Ardyn: “Flinch? Why would I-“
Ardyn: “Astrals save me….”
Ben: “You’re doing great, Ardyn! You have nothing to fear!!”
Ardyn: “Then why are you all the way over there?!? Benevolo Besithia, what in the void did you get me into?!” (AND HOW??!)
Ardyn: “I swear if I live through this, I’m just going to let the Starscourge take you!”
Ben: “Duly noted. Now don’t move. You’re intimidating her.”
Ardyn: “I’M INTIMIDATING HER?!?”
“……”
Ben: “Oh! She likes you? Fantastic!!”
Ardyn: “WHAT WOULD HAVE HAPPENED IF SHE DIDN’T?!?!!?”
cyno x gn!reader
“You’ll like him, I promise!”
“If he’s anything like you, I suppose.”
“Well…” You trail off, imagining you and your brother growing up and constantly being told how different the two of you are, from your personalities down to your looks. “Anyway! He can be a bit of a dummy, but he means well.”
Cyno nods, a thoughtful frown on his lips as he crosses his arms and waits for your brother to arrive at your meeting spot.
You spy the eye-catching ahoge from a mile away. Your beam, raising your hand in a wave and turning to your partner beside you—only to blink as you realize that he left without your notice.
The sound of steel against steel in the distance blares an alarm in your head. Frantic, you whip your head to the direction of the sound and find two very familiar individuals duking it out.
Oh no.
“Big brother Haitham, stop!”
They both freeze at the sound of your voice for two completely different reasons.
Al-Haitham pulls you behind him and points his sword at your very confused partner, uncharacteristically slow to connect the dots. “Choose your next actions carefully, Cyno.”
Cyno completely lowers his weapon as he switches his gaze between the two of you as if in disbelief that Al-Haitham, the so-called Akademiya lunatic who he’s barely spoken two words to, is your older brother. You, the light of his life—but also an Akademiya drop out who only managed to get in through sheer luck after your random answers on the entrance examination turned out to be right—were related to him?
Impossible.
…Or so he would have thought a minute ago before his world was turned upside down and his partner’s brother wasn’t the most suspicious person in Cyno’s eyes.
My brother is really smart like you! He’s really nice and he used to help me study for my tests back when I still went to the Akademiya. A little, um, mean—but he’s actually a good person!
Hah, mean. A large understatement. It would equate to a scholar calling the General Mahamatra benign.
He suppose he should have expected it from you. You do have the tendency to think the best of people, even when they don’t deserve it.
“Brother.” You tug on Al-Haitham’s arm to bring his sword down, but he refuses to do so, unwilling to take his eyes off Cyno. Huffing in annoyance, you stomp on his feet and feel immense satisfaction when he turns his head to glare at you.
“This isn’t the time—”
“He’s Cynie!”
There’s a joke to be made about a pin dropping in the silence after your words and your brother’s dawning look of realization and the skepticism that follows.
He whirls his head to Cyno and points, “That’s Cynie?”
You nod with a growing smile, delighted that your brother finally lowered his sword so you can come up to Cyno and drag him close by the arm. “Cynie, meet my brother, Haitham!”
“…I told you not to call me that in front of others.”
“But it’s cute!”
“Only when we’re alone.” To this, he sends a baleful glare to Al-Haitham that your brother returns with a glare of his own.
“Oh, please. My sibling has told me everything that’s happened in your relationship,” then, as if to add salt to the wound, he strictly emphasizes, “Cynie.”
A muscle in your partner’s brow twitches.
“It’s great that you two are getting along!” You exclaim with a smile that could rival the sun.
They can’t say no to that face. They both have no choice but to reluctantly grumble a hesitant ‘yes…’ that has your eyes shining bright.
“I have our outing planned for today! I saw a promo in a restaurant that said if you can finish some kind of large meal in under an hour, you don’t have to pay for it! Not too sure how big it is, but I know I can eat it all. I also passed by this really cool place yesterday…”
They let you drag them by the arm across the city, shooting glares at each other and throwing subtle barbs when they think you aren’t looking.
You called that day the ‘brothers-in-law bonding day’. They hated every second of it and vowed to never talk to the other again.
Unless you asked them to, of course.
“CHOISKZ” is a romance otome mobile game produced by 00hj and JYPE* coming to iOS and Android soon! *This graphic has no real connection or affiliation to/with JYP Entertainment, this was created solely for fun. [insp.]
please do not re-upload without my permission or delete my caption. click the images for better quality.
that boy is a monster. blade
jealous, clingy and possessive blade. suggestive + fluff content. gn! reader. 1.2k wc
Romance is an irrelevant variable in his records.
There is no storage space for that kind of foolish expression in his chest, his body nothing but a tool and physical entity filled with cracks and open holes from every nook and cranny. Blade doesn’t need love that would spill from his open wounds, he is someone who had pledged to Destiny’s slave. He was way too dutiful, too focused with work and violent in nature for something like that. So he shouldn’t feel anything, not even when Kafka had noticed the way his eyes had always stuck to you ever since you had first met, how often it’d soften so slightly in your direction. The cunning woman had sent Blade a mirthful look and a quick prompt of “looks like Bladie’s in love.” which he immediately dismisses with a breathy scoff and a roll of his shoulder.
Him, in love? It would’ve been passed on as a phenomenon.
So why. Why did his chest squeezed tightly when he saw you peering up at him. Blade’s eyes twitch when Xianzhou Alliance’s General himself sends you a fond smile, leaning down so you could reach and coddle the bird that perches on his shoulder. You laughed so heartily, ruffling the feathers of the small critter as Jing Yuan watched you, whispering something with his face so dangerously close to your own. If Blade wasn’t a wanted man in Luofu he wouldn’t resort to merely just standing and staring at the scene before him. He would’ve jumped out of his hiding spot, march up, scoop you into his arms and run off, whisking you away from that silver haired bastard and taking you somewhere private so he could coax you to look at him and only him—
Blade immediately catches on to his thoughts before they could flood over the walls. Thoughts that struck him surprise, thoughts that he didn’t know he was capable of having. Then, his hand landed on his chest where an odd ripple rested on his heart. It’s so foreign and so brand new to him to feel this way. Whatever it was, Blade had initially thought he had just caught a fever. But the undeniable voice at the back of his mind is prominent. He hated every second you smiled up at him, hated how your fingers had brushed ever so slightly at the fluffs and tousles of that general’s hair even if it was unintentionally, and how your sweet and adorable laugh mingled with his in fond unison.
He hated how you were giving someone else the attention that should’ve been his alone.
So when he finally gets to meet with you, in the cloak of night and the youthful stars kissing your bare cheeks a cold wispy promise, Blade could barely hold in his reigning annoyance. You were standing by the docks when he revealed himself. His stature is rigid, almost looming predatorily at you, his eyes stark ruby. But when you spot him, instead of fear your eyes waver a gentle glow of delight. “Lovely evening we are having, come join me?”
He doesn’t respond to your greeting, nor did he close the distance between you two. “Lovely.” he repeats. “The night is wretchedly cold, although it appears you do not need my company to warm you up, you’ve already found someone else for that role.”
“What are you on about?”
Blade leans closer, a dangerous murmur leaving the crook of his lips. “Pray tell, how did your sweet little confab with the Cloud Knight General go? You seem to be getting along with him quite well, very touchy even, out in broad daylight. So shameless.”
You were surprised by his cold tone.
“You..” But instead of being offended by his degrading words, feeling betrayal or fury, Blade is surprised when you chuckle.
He bites back a retort. “Did I say something amusing?” Shaking your head, you close the distance between you and the wanted swordsman, gathering both his cold cheeks into your palms, catching him off guard.
You tip your head ever so slightly. “Jealousy is a new look on you, Blade.”
His body stiffens. Jealousy?
“Jealous, me?”
“Why else would you come to me all pouty and gloomy tonight?” You smiled. “You’re practically covered in dark clouds from head to toe.”
“I’m not jealous, don’t be so ridiculous.”
His words catch in his throat when he sees your expression; crinkled eyes, a playful grin and a slight burn on your cheeks.
“So you’re saying I’m ridiculous for thinking you were jealous of General Jing Yuan interacting with me?”
“Right.”
At his response, you let out a defeated exhale. “So that’s how you perceive me?” You take a step back from him, shaking your head. “Ah well, what a shame. Since you’ve been so adamant about the General warming me up today then I might as well just visit him now and ask—“
You didn’t have time to finish your sentence, not when you’ve felt Blade’s arms wrap around your waist and in a flash your back is pressed against one of the building walls. He has you pinned, his chest making contact with yours and ruby eyes daunting, treacherously flickering at you.
“Quit playing with me.” He grits out, cradling your face and studying every visible line in your expression. Then you jolt when he leans down and nudges his nose in the crook of your neck, inhaling deeply before retreating slightly to trace his lips up and on your jawline. Your fingers tighten around his arm, face heating up at his sudden actions. “Blade?” You’ve stuttered out.
His mind moves on his own, finally giving in to this burn that could not falter. His blood is humming in his chest, heart pounding you a song as he lets his lips travel towards your cold, bare flesh. Oh how long he had actually dreamed of touching you like this.
Every teasing manner that bubbles in your throat had died and paved its way for the whimpers to come spilling down your teeth. Blade had his steady eyes on you, translating every squint of your brow or tremble of your lips, tucking it somewhere on the cabinets of his head—you looked utterly adorable, he wanted nothing more than to swallow you whole.
He’s not jealous, he reminds himself, tipping your chin and tilting his head to the side, enough for your lips to be mere centimeters apart and he cannot help but smirk.
He’s not jealous, his heart just feels a little green. He says to himself when his hands run down the crooks of your body, memorizing the pattern of your dips and falling victim to your sweet voice and warm touch.
He’s…not necessarily jealous, he thought when his eyes sought yours and his heart drew to you like a moth to a flame. Your hands wind up to tangle upon his raven locks, pulling him in, and in response he leans closer where a wall between you two slowly fissures at the seams.
Maybe, he quietly admits when his lips slot against yours like a perfect puzzle, tongue tasting your sweetness and hues as he deepens it, holding your waist firmly and thriving upon your scent on his nose, your lips on his, your touch swimming on his palms. Like you were just meant to be his.
Maybe he's a little bit jealous. Just a little.
jisung: chan truth or dare?
chan: truth
jisung: how many hours have you slept this week?
chan: dare
jisung: go to sleep
chan: i don’t like this game
fruits basket ⇢ THIRD TIME’S A CHARM ft. hatori sohma
a three-step guide to hatori sohma’s heart.
wc: 3k
warnings: smoking. talks of soulmates but not really a soulmate au. f2l but you’re more like hatori’s annoyance (affectionate). he’s a simp in denial. fluff with one grain of angst. self-indulgent because i miss my seahorse bae
one: try to get into hatori sohma’s interests.
“i didn’t know you smoke.”
hatori turns to the sound of your voice and upon seeing your approaching figure, he instinctively scoots over to make room for you on the bench by the river.
“occasionally.”
“can you do that thing?” you raise your index finger to draw invisible circles in the air. “you know… smoke rings?”
“yes.” when your eyes light up, he quickly adds: “but i won’t.”
“you are not fun at all,” you tease lightheartedly.
for the first time since you sat next to hatori, you take a look at your surroundings—maybe it was the zodiac curse but despite the already bright green landscape made technicolor by the variety of flowers peppered among the trees and the glitters of sunlight on the clear blue waters, you don’t remember the sohma estate being so alive and vibrant.
bit by bit, you soak it all in before sliding your gaze over to the man beside you as he takes another drag. even with his somber expression, he still looks beautiful from behind the cigarette.
tearing your eyes away from him, you notice a pack of squares peeking out of his lab coat.
“can i try?” you ask.
hatori follows your line of sight and immediately shoves the small carton deeper into his pocket. “no.”
“why not?”
“it’s not good for you.” you open your mouth to protest but he interjects. “stop asking.”
“do one smoke ring then i’ll stop.” at your request, hatori looks at you as if his patience is wearing thin but you don’t budge. “if you never wanted to do it, you should’ve just told me you couldn’t.”
he pinches the bridge of his nose as he internally curses in frustration because you’re not wrong.
“fine,” he concedes, visibly against his will.
genuinely captivated, you keep your eyes trained on hatori’s lips, completely oblivious to the fact that his composed demeanor is now mere pretense and right underneath is a man extremely self-conscious and hyperaware of your close inspection. suddenly, his throat feels dry and his hands clammy.
he’s thankful you’re too preoccupied to notice.
forcing his thoughts away, he puffs at his cigarette and with his mouth formed into an “o”, he blows out a smoke ring. he waits until it fully takes shape in front of you before fanning it away, deliberately ignoring the awestruck gleam in your eyes.
“you have to teach me that,” you enthuse.
“i thought you said you’d stop asking.”
as a doctor, hatori is aware not only of the dangers of tobacco, but also the greater risks of secondhand smoking. and it’s his job to make sure you don’t suffer from any complication—not you in particular, he tells himself—so in spite of his cigarette still having a few drags left, he drops it to the ground and crushes it beneath his heel.
he’s just doing his job.
two: ask hatori sohma if he believes in soulmates.
shortly after sundown, swirly hints of orange and pink have begun mixing with the incoming muted shades of blue across the sky, the temperature of the wind dropping with it—rather rapidly due to the ocean breeze—but that doesn’t stop anyone from going for a swim, save for those dotted about the sand, and giving life to the seafront which only grows brighter due to the lampposts along the perimeter.
however, the oddness of your question pushes the scenery to the background as hatori searches your face for any telltale sign that you’re messing with him. you’re not.
“what brought this on?” he asks.
“just making conversation.”
“have this conversation with ayame.”
unable to count the number of times you’ve rolled your eyes at his curt replies, you’re surprised they haven’t stuck. “can you, at least, humor me?”
“no.”
typical, you think.
walking side by side along the boardwalk, you fall into silence that hatori quickly finds unbearable—which is ironic, considering he’s naturally a reserved man—so he gives in. “fine.”
something jumps in his chest when you turn to him, beaming, but he immediately shoves the feeling down before he can give it any thought.
“i don’t believe in soulmates,” hatori claims. “i think you choose the person you want to be with—or meet them through happenstance, even. but not fate.”
“so…” you drawl, a soft smile involuntarily tugging at the corners of your lips. “you spending time with me tonight—was it by choice?”
you choose the person you want to be with. hatori mentally kicks himself for letting the words roll off his tongue without a care. now you have him right where you want him.
“a coincidence,” he asserts in an attempt to shut you down, already predicting where you’re going with your ribbing. “you were alone and i happened to have some free time.”
“which you chose to spend with me,” you counter triumphantly but even the melodious laughter from your lips fails to blunt the daggers he’s now throwing your way. “okay, sorry. sorry. but assuming soulmates exist, who do you think you’d be with right now?”
“i don’t know,” he answers in one breath.
“what would you be doing right now?”
“i don’t know.”
“you’re the worst.” you huff, finally dropping the subject.
and he’s grateful because he’s lying.
he does believe in kismet.
bound by the curse for most of his life, it was as if he’d been walking on a path that was already carved in stone and waiting at the end of it was his fate with no one to share, only his for the taking—so like some sort of paradox, he refuses to acknowledge destiny altogether, even after the spiritual ties had already been cut. it’s all he’s ever known.
besides, indulging in the idea that something written in the stars could ever be within his reach—even if it was right in front of him taking after your image—is like setting himself up for heartbreak and disappointment.
and hatori sohma’s smarter than that.
three: say “i love you” to someone else.
“you’re quiet today,” hatori says.
“has shigure not annoyed you enough that you actually want me to talk?”
you know shigure hasn’t because he’s been gone for a while now, along with ayame, and hatori’s choice to stay behind is enough for you to assume his friends are up to some shenanigans he couldn’t care less about.
“you’re only half as bad as him,” hatori jokes, a small grin playing on his lips and you can’t help but smile back.
truth be told, your playful exchange can only do so much to mask your feelings until they threaten to spill out of you as soon as you open your mouth. and though you’ve surprisingly managed to keep them under control this whole time, it’s as if you’re constantly being pulled towards opposite ends of the spectrum.
hatori has his way of being within your proximity and still seem so out of reach—you’re never sure if he’s suffocatingly close or you want to be smothered by him.
but you can’t tell him that.
“i’ll just go for a walk,” you say instead.
the sudden announcement causes a look of worry to form on hatori’s face but despite the warmth blooming in your chest over his concern for you, you convince yourself it’s just the doctor in him.
of course, he cares. he cares about everyone.
“are you alright?”
“yeah, i just need some air.”
you leisurely tread the pathways of the estate, mentally counting your steps to keep your mind occupied but eventually losing track anyway as your thoughts drift back to hatori.
before you know it, you’re sat by the lakeside which you instantly recognize from the first time the sohmas took you to their family cottage for an outing.
“care to share the woes of your heart?”
the familiar lilt of ayame’s voice—and his dramatic language—soon echoes in the wind and a smile makes its way to your face, finding his theatrics somewhat comforting at a time like this.
sitting next to you, he asks again. “something on your mind?”
“it’s nothing.”
“perhaps this will lift your spirits?” he plucks a wildflower from the ground, presenting it to you. “may i?” when you give your consent, ayame delicately tucks it behind your ear, leaning slightly further as if to admire his work. “so beautiful and ethereal. truly out of this world.”
“stop.” you say, giggling as you take the flower out of your hair and lean on his shoulder. “thank you, aya. love you.”
ayame rests his head on top of yours. “i love you, too, darling.”
unbeknownst to you, hatori followed you quite shortly, unconvinced by the way you brushed off his concern. but he doesn’t expect to find you with ayame, lax and cheery as opposed to you being closed-off earlier—with him, the voice in his head adds and he wishes he could strike it off.
“can i ask you something?” hatori hears you ask his friend but it’s the familiar question which follows that has his ears perking up. “do you believe in soulmates?”
hatori’s not one to listen in on other people’s converstions so without waiting for ayame’s response, he heads back to the cottage, suddenly feeling like an intruder.
“i know that’s just your face but… why the long face?” shigure asks.
hatori groans. “shut up.”
whatever shigure is about to say dies in his throat as ayame enters through the front door alone.
“where were you?” shigure asks him, acknowledging his arrival.
“i was at the lake with y/n.”
“oh?” the former dog incarnate shoots hatori a knowing look, though he continues to address yuki’s brother. “and what were you two doing?”
“i was wandering around and found her lonesome. like a poor damsel in distress in need of a comforting shoulder so i let her take advantage of me.”
hatori winces at ayame’s ill phrasing. “did you have to say it like that?”
leaning closer, shigure whispers low enough just for hatori to hear. “maybe she needs your comforting shoulder, too.”
“i told you to shut up.”
hatori gets up to leave before shigure can get another word out—he knows shigure will get another word out. with no set destination in mind, his feet move on their own accord. soon, he’s at his usual spot by the river.
you cross his mind again. recounting the events from today, he fails to pinpoint what caused the shift in your demeanor—if he caused it. it only leads to more questions because what did he even do?
he pushes his thoughts away, reaching into his pocket for a cigarette to clear his head but when he sees you walking in his direction, he decides against it.
“why do i always find you here?” you ask as soon as you join him where he’s stood at the riverside.
“it’s peaceful.”
“i’m guessing shigure finally pushed you to your limit.”
“i spoke too soon.” his dry humor coaxes a chuckle out of you and it’s only then hatori realizes how much he missed the sound of it. “i saw you with ayame today.”
“he just stayed with me for a bit. seeing me all by myself must have been too depressing even for him.”
“are you sure you’re okay?”
“mhm,” you hum in confirmation. when hatori doesn’t pry further, you change the subject. “remember when i asked you about soulmates and you told me to ask ayame instead?”
“i remember.” and you did, he doesn’t say out loud.
“well, i did. and he does,” you tell him. “believe, i mean. he said meeting his soulmate would be a beautiful surprise—something about braving the search for the uncertain making the discovery all the more blissful.” you smile as you recall ayame’s words. you can’t fault him for his flamboyant idealism because you know he has a big heart to show for it—it’s who he is. “i know it’s ayame we’re talking about but i think it’s nice to believe in something like that.”
“do you?”
how a question so concise can hold so much weight, you don’t know. but something in the way hatori asks you feels like the load has been dropped to your chest.
i don’t believe in soulmates. to this day, you still hear hatori’s words loud and clear and it’s like your heart is going to cave in. because you do—at least, you want to believe in it.
“i don’t know... maybe?” you suppose that’s the safe answer. “maybe soulmates exist but not everybody gets to meet theirs. sounds unfair, doesn’t it?”
“you can’t let that hold you back.”
a chuckle erupts from your lips though the sound is free of humor. “i’m scared i’ll meet my ‘soulmate’,”—you air quote the word—“and they don’t feel the same way.”
“if they are what you say they are, i don’t think you should worry about it.”
“and if they’re not? i don’t know if i can handle that.”
hatori takes him time mulling his words over before settling on a response. “you can avoid it altogether but there’s nothing worse than spending your whole life thinking what could’ve been…”
you glance at his direction and catch him smiling to himself wistfully as if he’s reminiscing a fond memory. you wonder if he’s thinking about kana.
you’ve never met his ex-fiancée but from what you’ve heard, they seemed to be the epitome of fated lovers had akito not meddled. and as if the knife hadn’t been twisted enough, hatori was forced to erase kana’s memories—being the only sohma to possess that ability—to free her from the torment of her entanglement with the binds of his curse which, in turn, had become hers as well. all because she loved him sincerely.
without any recollection of her relationship with hatori, kana is now married to someone else and hatori seems to have moved on.
you look away from him, staring straight ahead and feeling ashamed because it feels so wrong to use that in your favor but…
“you think i should just go for it?” you ask hatori.
“i do.”
“even if it’s you?”
your voice comes out a whisper but the immediate hush from hatori, amplifying the tension encompassing you both tells you it’s enough to bring everything at a standstill.
the longer his silence drags on, the deeper your heart sinks. you can only wish that in its descent, it crushes the butterflies in your gut, putting an end to your foolish feelings once and for all. but you know it won’t.
just like how you’ve fallen for him, no depth is deep enough—your heart will just have to plummet endlessly. maybe time will numb you but you’re certain that one way or another, you’re always going to have love for him.
“this is the part where you tell me off,” you say in jest but it falls painfully flat.
“if i told you i feel the same way, would you start believing then?”
if it was possible for your entire system to shut down in an instant, you’re almost convinced that it already has because with your breath catching in your throat comes the pounding in your head that matches the beat of your heart hammering wildly against your chest.
you muster enough courage to finally look at hatori, almost flinching when you find him already staring at you. and with that, everything begins to fade out of focus until it’s just him—laying himself bare for the first time and yet, you’re the one who feels disarmed.
even at the zenith of your emotions, his touch still grounds you as his thumb gently swipes over the apple of your cheek. “you’re crying.”
“i’m nervous,” you sheepishly mumble.
“i think i’m the one who should be nervous. i heard you say you love ayame.”
you can never tell with the monotony in hatori’s voice so for a moment, you think he’s crushed but when you only find the affection he holds for you in his eyes, you decide to poke fun at him in your usual good-natured fashion.
“jealous?” despite the shake of his head, a smile creeps across hatori’s face. “he’s my friend, too. i do love him. and shigure. a little.”
hatori laughs—an actual laugh, you note—and closes the distance between the two of you, pulling you into his embrace as he presses a chaste kiss on your temple.
as infuriating as shigure’s teasing may be, hatori realizes it’s the little push he needed to take another leap. ever since what happened with kana, the notion of falling in love again seemed too big a risk but now standing on the edge with you, he doesn’t mind the free fall at all.
but hatori swears to die before he tells shigure. otherwise, he’ll never hear the end of it.
“i can’t believe you actually like me,” you mumble against his chest. “is it by choice or you know… ‘happenstance’?”
releasing his hold on your torso, hatori gently cradles your face in his palms, his purple eyes staring into yours so lovingly that it’s in full contrast with the words that come out of his mouth.
“i almost forgot how vexing you are.”
your smirk morphs into a full-blown grin. “you’re not answering my question.”
“figure it out yourself.” his words are muttered against your lips before he captures them with a kiss that swiftly grows in fervor, setting your nerves ablaze—and like ice to a flame, you melt into his touch.
the whole world is soon forgotten—just the two of you in motion as time freezes, giving way and lending itself generously to prolong this moment for your lover to commit to memory. perhaps this is the universe remembering what it owed him and handing it over on a silver platter.
there’s no more binding promise to tie hatori down but careful not to push his luck with jinxes, he doesn’t say anything definite. maybe it’s fate, maybe it’s coincidence, maybe it’s neither or both but one thing is for certain: hatori believes in soulmates.
how else would you have found a way to get under his skin and on his nerves then straight to his heart?
perfection = Qian Kun
his last unfulfilled wish.
— featuring. sunday x gn!reader
synopsis: before departure, sunday needed to bid you his farewell and make his silent amends, rather than leaving his emotions unsolved.
contains: 1k7 word vomit, 2.7 quest spoilers, angst (& fluff <<< clickbait), childhood bestfriend implication, messy emotions, minor character studies (if u squint), meeting you after he met robin first.
forenotes: sunday is such an overthinker and lana del rey coded to me. however i’m not content with how i write the siblings here so i’m sorry if it doesn’t sit right with you crowbie 😭😭
header img by 隐世樱yyy on weibo. kindest regards to my two pookies @akutasoda and @vxnuslogy for brainrotting with me and proof-reading this piece for me, i love yall so much!
🎼 — ( ding ding!! a message for crowbie @asundries / @rainswept the receiver! )
merry christmas my dear director crow :stares_at_you: are you surprised that i am your secret santa ? (somebody is definitely not ready for sunday angst as a christmas gift ngl.) BRO IT'S YOU HAHAH.
jokes aside for now... iko wants to say that she is very blessed to have such a wonderful friend like you to be around, she hopes your relationship will continue to thrive and maintain as you both step into 2025 ahead! with every kindest words and this piece dedicated to you, she is once again wishing you a merry christmas and a happy new year! xoxo.
“dear mr. sunday, you have now finally witnessed the sun, your wish has been fulfilled.”
in the seemingly deafening silence of the radiant orange-hued sky, sunday stood still.
“however, before you depart,” that indistinct voice was a light and gentle echo but felt dripped with sarcasm in his ears—he believed it was his heart that spoke. the wistful glint in his eyes betrayed the repetitive chant of his rational determination, sabotaging and leaving him slightly wavered about his predetermined decision.
“are you completely certain you would leave penacony behind without regrets?”
was a prime fugitive like him allowed the privilege of deciding such a personal matter? ironically, he wouldn’t want his answer to that question to be anything else.
“…no, i do not.”
not when he never got the chance to justify himself to you before the day he abruptly vanished. vividly, it haunted him—your sad smile haunted him, indicating that he once again had disappointed somebody, and it shocked him at how he never planned that ‘somebody’ to be you. (he never planned to disappointed anyone, really.) it was almost laughable at one’s stupidity, the one who refused to recognise that your reaction he observed this time was never akin to the momentary awkwardness in your voice caused by his usual polite and harmless nonchalance to your little silent declarations out of affection. he heard your love, yet he had never responded.
contrary to the cold and refreshing thin air it seemed, the tip of his tongue felt bitter. sunday knew it all too well. it was the guilt of turning you down and neglecting you for more significant matters that he grew tired of experiencing once more; typically, all of his doubts could only be dissipated as soon as the bright smile he adored written on your face not long later, you seemed to be unfazed quick enough—a truly admirable yet disheartening scene he witnessed; carefree and understanding, that was what you were.
(sunday never admitted it but your radiant smile was the cause of the thumping heart in his chest, one that made his collected facade falter ever so slightly when looked at, and one suddenly brewing his stomach with guilt each time it didn’t match with your soulless gaze.)
sceptical, cunning man in the way he was, sunday was unsure if that was the very last time he ever saw you like that again after he had failed you so many times before…
you would come back, yes. that was what you’d always done, wasn’t it?
that was what you had always done.
not this time, though… you left him awaiting.
and when he was standing next to you in his cowardice disguise in the light but freezing-cold evening, admiring the way you blew out on your fingers gracefully, hot breaths turning into smoke, that breathtaking smile still, lips plumped red like roses in the white snow, the world stilled for a moment. (he wished it would last forever.) you looked happy and bright, he couldn’t search anywhere in your eyes for the adoration you once harboured, the one that used to be easily spotted every time your eyes met.
maybe you just didn’t know that the one you were conversing with wasn’t a mere dreamweaver.
maybe you still had feelings for him… maybe, it simply wasn't appropriate to discuss such private matters with a passerby, a fact he completely agrees.
but were you, though? after all this time? sunday felt his chest heavy. you were there, like a star within reach, but far enough to only be observed in the radiant sky. then suddenly and a little too late, it came to his perception that his heart had long been beating for you. and at the biggest loss of it all was he only realised, you and robin, were everything he had left.
was he too late to make amends?
you were beautiful, he’d take that. not to mention the way your hand loosely clung onto the smooth material of your slightly worn-out scarf. a maroon colour that utterly complimented your skin tone, he recognised that scarf.
“you have an exquisite scarf… it suits you.”
the dreamweaver couldn’t help the words that slipped “her” lips, “she” mentally cursed “herself” for saying such an odd thing, but your light laugh after the bewildered look you gave dissipated every quickened pulse of “hers”, completely drew all of “her” attention to your graceful demeanour, rather than what you were saying by the moment.
“xipe up above… please, hear my plea”
“it was a gift from an old friend, whom i really cherished.” the glowy tint of your lips arched into a thin smile, and, dear aeons… there it was, that same endearing look with so much stars swimming in your eyes. the look of love.
(two winters ago, your endearing shy look, heated cheeks as you reached out for the delicately box in his hands—a simple present for you for the first holiday ever spent together as adults, your fingers brushing against the comforting material as you opened it, eyes glimmered with joy. of course he remembered. that expression of yours imprinted in his mind, confused but amused at how his little gift has an effect on you, you were an adorable thing if he must admit.)
“forgive my desperation to sin just this one last time.”
“he went away for some reasons, i believed it was the same reason why my adoration was left unrequited,” you looked up at the sky, nostalgic. “it’s a little embarrassing to admit, don’t you think?”
at your simple and hearty laugh, sunday could only manage a silent shaky breath.
“please, xipe.”
“i do miss him, dearly,” you let out a light chuckle, nuzzling your face against the fuzzy fabric with the corner of your eyes crinkled. “do you think that i would be able to see him again?”
— “please for once, allow me to be deserving of them, to make amends for everything i’ve damaged”
with certainty, in his heart, that ‘everything’ was you. never one-sided, never unrequited.
sunday thought about you, ignoring the blooming feeling of overwhelmed emotions, his steps were restrained from approaching closer. but then your final question had the words die on his tongue, lingering like an illness that couldn’t be cure.
would your paths converge underneath the sun?
reality is different. having come this far, the boat that used to guide sunday here was burnt down, and there was no way of turning back.
“i miss you, too, dearly.” he wanted to say.
“i like you” or “the feeling is mutual” even, and how he wanted to tug the strands of your hair behind your ears like he always did back then the moment he saw them fell out of place. but sunday was still a coward. he wondered if you hated him, that you couldn’t bear witness the person you love disappeared then reappear and just begging for forgiveness, it kicked at his dignity and insecurities. perhaps… this barrier between you both was comfortable alright.
“i think he misses you, too.” words emboldened by the sudden courage but soon deflated when “she” meet your observant gaze. yeah… how could a nobody be so sure about that?
“…my apologies, please forgive such an bold assumption.” “she” cleared “her” throat.
“it’s okay, i’m glad that you get comfortable when talking to me.” and sunday realised that he had lost count of how many times he was mesmerized by the melody of your laugh, your soft hum.
the small talk could last for an eternity, that was the greediest wish sunday allowed himself to yearn for. (he thanked xipe for that.)
“mr. sunday, are you ready to board the express?” and he peeked over his shoulder. welt yang, his companion by pure serendipity, stopping on his steps and looked at him with anticipation.
by now, the sun has dipped deeper and almost disappeared in the horizon, purple-blue hued vast sky sprinkling with faint streaks of stars, city lights awaken, leaving the man with the small void in his chest, half-filled. heart spoke otherwise but mind obliged to the better, but wasn’t “better” always hurt most? it was all over, it’s time to go.
you studied the way robin was blowing out smoke, panting softly as she ran over to you not long after the fellow dreamweaver left. the expression on her face was what you couldn’t decipher, a frown was written, her smile was filled with sorrows, and it made you fumbled.
“it seems like you have met her, too.” she sighed with a smile, adjusting her scarf, which was also a gift from her dearest brother.
the dreamweaver did say an odd thing earlier before “she” departed, though. “she” claimed to only knew a thing or two about beliefs, but then you sensed the dejection in “her” tone before “she” clasped “her” hand together and seeming to close “her” eyes and wish despite the machinery face.
a mutter of sincerest apologies and best wishes for the person “she” wished to make amends to, followed by shaky chants of whispered please’s that sure was heart-warming. then “she” looked at you, “her” wistful and delighted expression was seen through somehow, how confusing, yet so beautiful and sympathetic.
and when “she” changed her gaze elsewhere, speaking out her final words before silence settled in between the two of you again.
“they mesmerised me, i should’ve recognised that sooner” and you think that was heartening. that it was good for her.
“i’m glad” said robin.
“you’re… glad?” you blinked, didn’t hold a grasp on why she seemed happy about it.
the singer only chuckled brightly, she nodded.
“what a pity that the story of yours was incomplete…” she trailed off.
“…[name], your name has been prayed.” you didn’t miss the way her eyes softened, a glowing hint of wetness then she looked away. “for now, we must wait for THEM to cast an eye upon his unfulfilled wish.”
when sunday was down on his knees, you were how he prayed.
(lol u thought.)
© 2024 https-sourlimes. all rights reserved.
-
whoreforlanadr liked this · 2 months ago -
jlovscatsss liked this · 2 months ago -
sanemisfreakywife liked this · 2 months ago -
leighheartz liked this · 2 months ago -
pinkheartbeat reblogged this · 2 months ago -
miraemae liked this · 3 months ago -
bringmethewolves liked this · 3 months ago -
jaemcaffe liked this · 3 months ago -
violetvixen13 liked this · 4 months ago -
gojosatireou reblogged this · 5 months ago -
gojosatireou liked this · 5 months ago
-
tcctchzoke liked this · 6 months ago -
chocolatemoon156 liked this · 6 months ago -
iayanam liked this · 6 months ago -
sanemisworld reblogged this · 6 months ago -
sanemisworld liked this · 6 months ago
-
nathalynata liked this · 6 months ago -
craftychildcrusade liked this · 6 months ago -
bttmasepop16 liked this · 6 months ago -
9unfire liked this · 6 months ago -
flutterbutter177 liked this · 6 months ago -
beeh-ive liked this · 6 months ago -
soleisolos liked this · 6 months ago -
itsyourlocalfriendlymars liked this · 6 months ago -
yaemikoisamommy liked this · 6 months ago
-
saccharinesolaris liked this · 6 months ago -
snekluvsbread liked this · 6 months ago -
nitnat87 liked this · 6 months ago -
omgstudyingrocks liked this · 6 months ago -
stayvibesss liked this · 6 months ago -
thoughtfulhologramcolor liked this · 6 months ago -
sunarinsbabymomma liked this · 6 months ago -
attemptztowrite liked this · 6 months ago -
kixny liked this · 6 months ago -
demonslayerismylife liked this · 6 months ago -
musiclover84898 liked this · 6 months ago -
bunny-belle-11 liked this · 6 months ago -
venixx liked this · 6 months ago -
rauv-a liked this · 6 months ago -
iwaizumiee reblogged this · 6 months ago -
iwaizumiee liked this · 6 months ago
-
tomiokasecretlover liked this · 6 months ago -
foundmyikigai liked this · 6 months ago -
starryknight565 reblogged this · 6 months ago -
chuuyaworlddomination liked this · 6 months ago -
watcher1-101 liked this · 6 months ago -
hotpinkbimbo liked this · 6 months ago -
yurisuperb liked this · 6 months ago -
getosshampoo liked this · 6 months ago -
era-etra liked this · 6 months ago
