Gue Mengalokasikan Energi Ke Hal-hal Penting Buat Gue.

Gak boleh pasrahan, harus aktif!

Heading to 30 #1

Semoga aku bisa jalan2 ke luar negeri

Bisa ngasih duit lebih banyak ke Bapak Mama

Punya sumber penghasilan lebih dari 1

70 kg

Punya badan sexy sampe memuja diri sendiri

Punya keluarga sendiri :) Suami aja cukup

Rambut tebel!

Random banget pagi-pagi bikin akun Google Ads sama MailChimp.

Bukan tanpa alasan sih bikin 2 hal ini. Bikin Google Ads karena pengen nyoba beriklan kos Puri Cartenz. Sementara utk MailChimp sih yha pengen iseng2 aja gitu nyobanya wkwkkwkw

Subuh2 overthinking

the problem is I'm craving for men's attention... I always see myself as a whore.

Being surrounded by men makes me feel secure and...wanted

Alongside, people who do not reciprocate my feelings are more attractive than those who do otherwise.

I'm that ungrateful girl as I'm still seeking other men (or women) while I have one who is willing to accept my true self.

the issue here lies between I need external validation and i love being the center of attention

I love it when ppl say I'm pretty, a good kisser, the goddess on the sheet, a motherly figure, smart or independent. they define my self-worth. however, it comes to my subconscious mind that - sadly - I'm attempting to fit men's conventional standards. You can guess where I lead to be? yes, that pick-me-girl type

Been aware that my childhood has shaped me into what I am today and fixing is a loooooong journey. i dont make any improvement yet. it's so fckin hard to be consistent and disciplined. see? im still struggling.

in reality, I really understand the reason why I was cheating or seeking other opportunities is to find security. my birth chart said that I can grow if I have been in a stable environment. stable here means in a secure place literally - figuratively. yet, i can confirm this is 100% accurate.

how can I create this safe place on my own? everyday, i have battles to win for

how can i be independent?

how can I stand up for myself?

how can i stay loyal and be grateful for what I have now?

do I feel enough?

Happy Aquarius Season!

Sebentar ya.. Aku lagi capek

1/30

Harusnya aku merasa bersyukur. Masih memiliki orang tua lengkap yang sehat dan mencurahkan kasih sayangnya pada anak-anaknya. Meskipun kami berada di hubungan yang rumit, tapi mereka tetap orang tuaku.

Sayang, benci. Suka, duka. Emosi, logika. Semuanya berkumpul menjadi dinamika.

Tuhan, izinkan aku membahagiakan mereka. Aku ingin mereka bangga padaku. Bukan. Bukan jadi benalu.

Aku memilih untuk bertanggung jawab yang sudah aku mulai.

Moi

How Not to be Disappointed by Other People

How many times do I have to tell you, Vic? Never expecting someone abundantly!

It’s not literally their fault, unless they promise for nothing. Here here I tell you to do better:

1. Make your points clear to avoid misunderstanding and unnecessary assumption from both parties.

2. Giving trust is not a crime. Some people deserve trust but some of them could ruin it. So, keep checking to assure they’re in a right track, but do not be aggressive. They need a space too.

3. Forgiving is ok, yet if they break more than once, you’d better think do they deserve the second chances.

3. Separate personal and professional matters.

4. The world does not revolve around you, put yourself in their shoes.

5. Any situation could happen in a blink of your eye, so keep calm. Then, anticipate what you can control.

Are you newcomer here?

Welcome, you are reaching to this post.

I have no idea whether Tumblr is still hyped here. People mostly use Blogger, Wordpress, and Medium. <i> However, it’s alright </i> because I am not blabbering my personal matters here for monetization. 

I own two Tumblr’s blogs. This blog sparks the light side, while the other one is like....a sin spot. Teehee

Ok, happy reading!