Fanfiction is becoming people’s primary form of entertainment right now because most media right now is so cheap, bland, recycled, and sponsored by people who love money more than the source material. Fanfiction is written for free by people who genuinely love what they’re writing about. That’s why it’s better. That’s why it’s more satisfying. Fanfiction is a home-cooked meal made for yourself and for your friends. Media today is junky fast food spoiled by too much grease and the knowledge that the people producing it are being criminally mistreated and underpaid.
They could be so funny and terrifying, like Obi-Wan went through a soul shredding experience with Alpha-17 as his only company. They're friends because what else are you gonna be after you witness each other at absolute rock bottom from torture.
It's like 'dog put in cage of cheetah who's threatening to go crazy', except the dog is a grizzly bear and also threatening to go crazy.
Emotional support trooper except the trooper in question has never done any sort of supporting in his life and is actively an emotional distress trooper to a great number of the CC batch.
I want them texting everyday, I want Obi-Wan mailing handmade BFF bracelets to Alpha and Alpha sending pics back of him flipping off the camera but still wearing them, I want Alpha using Obi-Wan to keep track of and occasionally terrorize his cadets, I want 17 ending problems in the GAR (like Krell) before they begin because Obi-Wan has him shipped out on a personal transport at the first opportunity, decked out with slug-throwers Obi-Wan got him for his decant-day.
Natborn officers think this is all just an odd indulgence of General Kenobi, the Vode, however, correctly identify it as a goddamn threat and their danger assessment of Obi-Wan ticks up significantly.
When Alpha arrives on Kamino, Shaak Ti presses a shiny new comm into his hand. It has the Jedi Order symbol painted onto it alongside a smiley face sticker, and it pings immediately with a new message: Hello! I hope you're settling in well!
Alpha stares at the message, stares at the singular contact named 'OWK' and then stares Shaak Ti in the eye as he pitches the comm straight into the ocean. Shaak Ti's serene smile only grows larger as she calmly reaches into her robes and pulls out an identical comm, only this one has a frowny face sticker, and presses it into his hand. It lights up: I'm afraid we've bonded, Alpha :). Alpha shuts it off and pockets it with resignation.
Cody arrives on Alpha-17's personal recommendation.
A-17: He's the most difficult little bastard I have. You're perfect for each other. OWK: Thank you, he's very handsome :3 A-17: No. Stop.
The first thing he asks once he gets comfortable is who his general is texting so much that has him swinging his legs and twirling his hair. Cody assumes it's Anakin, given they seem joint at the hip anyway, but little does he know Obi-Wan's ability to consistently have the Weirdest Relationships Ever.
"Oh, it's Alpha-17, I understand you're familiar with each other?" Hmm. OK. Cody.exe is experiencing a processing error, please hold. He exits the room instead of answering. The next day he peeks over the General's shoulder when he's texting and sees walls of rambling messages from Obi-Wan. Alpha-17 replies every hour with a single text: Lose this number. Obi-Wan giggles. "He's so funny." he says.
When Obi-Wan meets the rest of the CC batch, Cody makes sure to stand perfectly angled so that he can record the reactions when his general cuts off their introductions with "Oh, no need, Alpha-17's told me all about you." It's always immediate FEAR.JPG followed by a slow spiral of What The Fuck.
What do you mean by that General. What does that mean Cody. What do you mean they text. No. Cody. What the fuck is happening, Cody. Alpha-17 doesn't have friends he has enemies and enemies he tolerates enough not to shoot on sight.
OWK: Wolffe reached for his vambrace? when I mentioned you A-17: That's where he keeps his spare knife. OWK: Hm that does explain the way he eyed me up, ambitious. A-17: Clearly not enough, he should have followed through. I taught them better.
— Luke Skywalker
Okay, okay so I’m thinking of an au mashup in which Obi Wan gets de-aged in the middle of the clone wars, except Obi Wan is now at the age when his prophetic visions and slightly offputting nature were at they’re height.
I tend to follow the belief, in Seer!Obi wan fics, that Yoda took one look at the 8 year old Obi Wan who keeps telling him increasingly creepy little snippets of his future and the looked at Sifo-Dyas rocking back and forth in the corner doodling the same face over and over, with slight variations, muttering insanities as Dooku tries to lure him out with a trail of biscuits and tea, and just went. No. Absolutely not. Not doing this again. And the council at the time just sort of agreed to put a mental block in place to stop Obi Wan from growing up into Sifo-Dyas Junior.
This is was all fine and dandy, until Obi Wan is suddenly 7 again without this block in place and planets away from anyone capable of rebuilding it again. Force forbid they allow Skywalker a go at it.
Now there’s an unsettling redheaded child making very worrying, very creepy comments.
Anakin: awww, aren’t you a cute!!!
Baby!Obi-Wan: Your hands drip with the blood of trillions, Your arrogance veils the sins you wish not to confront, Your decrepit body shall live on long past your own death, in a cage of its own making.
Anakin: : - 0
Baby!Obi-Wan: but thank you : - )
Ahsoka and Rex are very reluctant to be near the baby after he tells them how everyone they love will die and they shall continue on, surrounded but alone all the same.
Cody and the 212th choose to endure the comments on how they will die enslaved, put down by the masters that created them, deprived of personhood and kindness because creepy baby or not, that’s they’re general right there, they can figure all the freakiness out after the they’ve comforted the child. (They are immensely worried over this, though)
It’s not like Obi wan is enjoying this either. He doesn’t want to predict all this, it won’t stop!
Dooku, on the other hand is thrilled. He kind of regrets not keeping his lover Sifo-Dyas around as his own personal fortune cookie machine / Magic 8 ball. Not cause he misses him or anything. Not at all. He just thinks the tactical advantage would be wonderful! (This is slightly ignorant of how unstable and harmful Sifo’s visions were) To have his Grandpadawan back in this impressionable, powerful state would also be wonderful!
He changes his mind after about 10 minutes with said grandpadawan.
He wants the adult one back please. The 7 year old is dissecting his soul and telling him how pointless his life decisions have been :-(
Shit really hits the fan when baby!Obi-Wan accidentally bumps into Sheev.
Obi wan returns to adult form in a galaxy that sort of resembles this
He can’t do much complaining though considering it was him that caused this.
I’m a total sucker for fics where Harry is dark and gets sorted into Slytherin, but I’m also really disappointed with how Ron and Hermione are treated in them
So: dark au where the trio is sorted into Slytherin
Hermione, who wants to use knowledge to change the world
Ron, who wants to finally be free of his family’s shadow
Harry, who wants to be great, to be admired, to be free
The teachers adore quick, clever Granger, but Severus worries when he sees the way she eyes the restricted section, how her mind is filled with deadly recipes and the ways to use them
The purebloods learn not to badmouth the halfbloods, not to bully the muggleborns, because Hermione knows forbidden magic, Hermione knows the untraceable poisons and the painful curses-and Hermione knows how to avoid being caught
No one outside of Slytherin pays attention to Ronald Weasley, so quiet compared to his brothers, and that’s a mistake
Ron casts his first dark spell and the power takes his breath away, Ron sinks into the comfort of blood rituals and makes outlawed sacrifices to forgotten gods
Ron wonders how his family could abandon this happiness in favor of a flickering light
Harry, the chosen one, the special one, the abandoned one
Harry looks at the light, looks at the people that did nothing for him, and dives into the dark
Lockhart dies drinking poison, Snape finds the trio huddled around Peter’s body, the aurors that find Umbridge’s remains vomit, and the Wizarding World doesn’t notice
Voldemort rises and does not face an old man and a group of do gooders
Voldemort rises and faces a witch with a brilliant mind and no taste for mercy, a wizard that delights in bloodshed and manipulates people like he moves chess pieces, and the broken, bloody boy that’s won their loyalty
Voldemort falls
Part 2/7 - Previous / Next
Track: ‘Glitter & Gold’ - Barns Courtney
Cody had always said Rex would be the death of him, but he never thought about it quite so literally until he was watching his younger brother running headlong towards The Kriffing Sith Lord with two lightsabers in his hands. The cry Cody let out didn’t even sound like a word, simply a guttural feeling of fear as Rex was launched thirty feet into the air without even a second of hesitation.
It felt wrong. It was all wrong. Rex should never be alone like that. Cody was his big brother, he should always be there for him. He would die if he was alone, they always did.
He isn’t alone.
Cody wasn’t sure how the thought had come to be, but with a sudden clarity it all made sense. The goal was clear and as Rex landed before Palpatine's sneering face Cody whipped around to Obi-Wan.
“General, I need to be up there!” he yelled.
Obi-Wan blinked at him. Obviously the thought of his commander, and more importantly love of his life, running towards what looked like certain death was not what he wanted to hear right now; especially when he already had his little brother potentially dying behind him. He even got so far as to scrunch up his nose and start to argue before Ahsoka cut in.
“Master Obi-Wan!” she yelled, still holding her ground by the cliff and using it as an advantage to launch droids off the edge. “Focus on the force. It is their fight!”
Cody didn’t really know what they were saying and he wasn’t sure he cared as he watched Palpatine's red saber slowly grow. “Obi-Wan,” he nearly whispered. “Please.”
Obi-Wan took a breath, smoke burning his throat and tears from more than just the sting of ash in his eyes. He held out his lightsaber, his very life, for Cody to take. “You are coming back to me.”
It was a statement; and Cody took it and the lightsaber with more reverence than he could ever convey. He let the blade come to life, flooding him in light as he met Obi-Wan's gaze. “Always.”
STAR WARS cast morphed [credit: morphy_me on IG]
Daisy Ridley & Carrie Fisher
Hayden Christensen & Adam Driver
Harrison Ford & Alden Ehrenreich
Ewan McGregor & Alec Guinness
Felicity Jones & Daisy Ridley
Mark Hamill & Sebastian Stan
Harrison Ford & Adam Driver
Natalie Portman & Daisy Ridley
John Boyega & Oscar Isaac
And this is why I could never be the hero
some might think i just have a bad boy/rebellion complex for shipping hermione w mostly slytherins & being an absolute sucker for gray/dark hermione...... but here’s the real reason!!!!!
(saw this on Strictly Dramione facebook group)